Ofolrodi

by Imploding Colon


Fight or Stupid Fight

"Spit the cat-birb out!" Pinkie Pie bellowed. "Spit the cat-birb out!!!" she bellowed loudly before launching her ghostly self at the writhing neck of the Tatzlwyrm.

"Pinkie!" Twilight gnashed her teeth, twirling to keep up with Rainbow Dash's rapid movements around their otherworldly target. "It's no use! Will you give it a rest—?!"

"But it's got Wildcard!" Pinkie Pie stammered, continuing to "punch" and "kick" at the beast's scales with her incorporeal limbs. "Somewhere in there is a ghost throat just waiting to get choked! Rrrrrrrrrngh! Come on! Up the chuck, ya meanie-meanie-pants!"

"Could you please hang back?!" Rarity exclaimed, also struggling to maintain a professional survey of the fight. "You're more needed using that pinkie sense of yours to—"

"It's gonna dive!" Applejack shouted.

"She's right!" Fluttershy pointed at the ground. The scales of the beast shifted as it began descending into the sundered earth. "Any second now—!"

Holding her breath, Rainbow Dash dove low, twirled sideways, and strafed the pebble-riddled hole from which the wyrm was still protruding. As she saw the length of the monster sliding downward, she brought a hoof to her neck and summoned a burst of energy from her pendant. FLAAAAAAAASH!

A ruby stream of light pelted the circumference of the wyrm—startling it. It stopped in mid-descent and lunged its neck forward, slamming into the hard surface of the ground. THUD!

"!!!!!!" Wildcard was spat out. He cartwheeled Edgeside like a cricketball until—Thw-Thwppp!—the tentacles of the beast were launched at him. He blocked with Bard's staff. TH-THAP! The tips of the black tendrils stuck to opposite ends of the bludgeon, and Wildcard found himself struggling for control of the lengthy weapon. As the beast tugged and pullged at the late Desperado's staff, this only angered Wildcard all the more, and he wrestled with renewed vigor.

"Jordan—!" By now, Rainbow was gliding over to where the griffin fought a tug-of-war with the beast. He grasped his limbs and tugged at the ensnared weapon as well. "Just... let g-go!" her voice cracked. "Bard... Johnny would forgive you! I pr-promise—!"

But Wildcard only hissed and struggled harder to maintain control of the weapon. Sweat clung to his feathery headcrest as he wrenched a metal talon free and repeatedly slapped at the taut tendrils fused to the staff.

While Rainbow and Wildcard fussed with the creature...

...Seraphimus flew high above, studying the scene. She gazed at the upper half of the wyrm, slumped over and fighting with the two Heraldites. Then—with calm charcoal eyes—she looked aside and spotted a bevy of loose weapons and supplies. The spidersilk bows and chitinous arrows donated by the Spindlers glistened in the twilight, lying in full display.

"... ... ..." Swiiiiiish! Seraphimus descended in a pale blur. She landed, grasped an arrow in one hand and a bow in the other, somersaulted forward, then ended in a kneeling pose... aiming the projectile upwards at the beast. Notching the shaft of the arrow, she studied the head of the wyrm carefully. She took note of its torn frill, its dark blood leaking, its narrow black eyes arranged cylindrically around its fucshia crown. Finally—exhaling—Seraphimus squinted one eye and let the arrow fly. Thwiffffft!

SwiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiishChtung! The arrowhead sunk meatedly into one eye socket of the beast, embedding deep.

"RAWWWWWWWWRSSSSH!" The beast howled, shaking all over. Seraphimus tried firing another arrow, but the painful damage had evidently been done. The beast whipped its tentacles loose of Bard's staff, retracted the tendrils, and sank like a wet stone into the earth.

"!!!" Wildcard and Rainbow were flung forward, clattering across the broken ground with the Desperado's preserved weapon. Beneath them, the world shook and grumbled.

"Let us not forget the common rules of existence..." Seraphimus stood up with her bow and arrows. "If something lives... it can feel pain."

"Yeah... well..." Rainbow panted, standing up on wobbly hooves. "Let's just be glad your aim's way friggin' better than your poetry."

"Whatever..."

"Hey!" Logan's voice called from halfway between that spot and the plateau where the rest of the group were hiding. "Did you slay the damned thing or what?!"

As Wildcard struggled to get up, Rainbow looked aside at her friends. "Fluttershy? Rarity?"

"It's..." Rarity fidgeted. "...not exactly fleeing, darling."

"I sense it circling rapidly beneath us," Fluttershy said with a noticeable tremble. "It must be trying to get over the wound Seraphimus just dealt it."

"It's sure as heck mad!" Applejack's voice cracked. "That's for dang sure!"

"Well...?!" Rainbow slicked her bangs back, trying to catch her breath. "Is it coming back for us or not?!"

"Guuuu-uuuu-uuuuhhhhhhh!" Pinkie wobbled all over.

Twilight pointed at her. "What does that tell you?!"

"Luna Poop..." Rainbow tugged at Wildcard's talon and took off in a prismatic blur. Swoooosh! "To the plateau! Quick!"

As she and Wildcard took off, a solid column of broken earth surged after them.

Seraphimus cursed under her breath. Ascending rapidly, she flew backwards while aiming her bow and arrow at the ground—hoping for a length of scales to expose the beast at any moment. As if sensing her presence, the wyrm remained underground—burrowing ominously shallow. "It's in rapid pursuit!" she shouted.

"Move! Move!" Rainbow and Wildcard flew for the plateau. They reached down and picked up a gasping Logan along the way, dragging the fat stallion towards their lofty destination uphill. "Flynn! Kepler! Thinking caps on! We've got a super ticked-off space snake after our flanks!"

There was no response.

Panting, Rainbow squinted ahead at the plateau. Several large boulders and rocks were lying in the open twilight, and the bodies of multiple ponies—Herald and Dihmer alike—perched atop the loose chunks of earth. "Guys?! What the hay is going on—"

Rainbow spotted Ariel's sharp eyes stabbing her from afar. Kepler—perched next to her and Flynn—brought a silent claw up to his tusks, signaling for Rainbow and the rest to be silent.

Logan clammed up. Wildcard steadied his wingflaps as he and Rainbow dragged the stallion up onto a loose boulder. Perching down beside him, the two veteran travelers observed how still and quiet the locals were.

The Dihmers sat meditiavely on the boulders, scarcely breathing or saying a word.

Seraphimus hovered above the scene, armed with her bow and arrow and looking noticeably confused. She studied the still figures of the locals... then glanced Edgeside at the column of surging earth rolling towards the plateau. Holding her breath, she descended sharply and landed atop a chunk of rock—perching as silently as possible.

Rainbow's friends held their breaths. Fluttershy gnawed on her fetlock while Rarity squirmed visibly. In the meantime—though—Pinkie's body stopped shaking and quivering.

Then—as thunderously loud as the ambush had begun—the angry burrowing of the beast ceased. The ground beneath the plateau stopped shifting. The Dark Side was still.

One could hear a pin drop.

Instead, Rainbow Dash exhaled quietly. She pivoted about, studying the meditative poses of the Dihmers. "... ... ...how..." She leaned in towards Ariel and Flynn. "...how are they doing it...?"

"...they're not doing anything," Ariel whispered back. "...it's the boulders..."

"... ... ..." Rainbow stared down at the loose rocks separating their bodies from the solid earth of the plateau underneath. "... ... ...it senses us through the ground..."

Kepler nodded. "...and we have a bufferr," he whispered, gesturing at the rocks. "...so long as we rremain still..."

"...and quiet..." Flynn's mechanical eye rotated. He timed his breaths carefully. "...it doesn't know precisely where we are..."

Logan looked around, tail flickering nervously.

Wildcard was still sweating... catching his breath...

Seraphimus inhaled... exhaled. "...it..." She looked cautiously across the bed of rocks. "...it must know we're here..."

"...yes..." Kepler nodded. "...but if the actions of the Dihmerrs arre any indication, then we can wait it out..."

"...yeah..." Logan grimaced. "...but for how friggin' long...?"

Kepler blinked through his broken spectacles. He looked helplessly at Rainbow Dash.

Rainbow gulped. She stared at the ground—broken and disturbed—just beyond the crest of the plateau.

The Dihmers and the Herald sat in awkward silence... anchored in place as the twilight glimmered overhead...