//------------------------------// // Chapter 3 // Story: The Witch of Canterlot // by MagnetBolt //------------------------------// “Whether we wanted it or not, we’re stuck with you as the face of this deal between Equestria and Saddle Arabia. From what I can gather, you’re supposed to be one of the most intelligent ponies to come out of the School for Gifted Unicorns.” Vuvuzela leaned closer to me. He probably believed he was being intimidating. It wasn't very scary compared to Princess Luna around breakfast time. My hangover - which I’d managed to get despite never feeling any of the more pleasant effects of what I’d drunk - made me flinch at his tone. He took it as a sign of weakness. “I have to ask myself who wrote those reports, and why they were apparently so very inaccurate,” the ambassador continued. “Unless you have a better explanation for why you vanished for hours in the middle of the night after drinking heavily, causing a scene, and generally performing even worse as a representative of Equestria than Prince Blueblood, whom I previously assumed had set an unbeatable standard for inexcellence?” “You know,” I said, after he’d finished. “I thought I made it pretty clear that I wasn’t in a mood to be yelled at. Doing it early in the morning doesn’t change my opinion.” “I’ll stop the very moment I think that you’ll manage to do the right thing on your own, which at this rate--” I didn’t bother listening to the rest of his rant. My head was pounding but not so badly that I couldn’t cast spells. He vanished in a flash of teleportation. A manebursh dropped to the floor next to me, the pony holding it gasping in terror. I’d forgotten the maid was even there with Vuvuzela yelling in my face. “He’s just down the hallway,” I sighed. “He’s fine.” The maid nodded and picked the brush back up, edging closer to me like she’d been asked to brush a manticore instead of a pony. I tried to stay still, and she very lightly stroked my mane, making it nearly halfway through the curls before it snagged on a knot, I twitched, and she made a sound like a surprised rodent and jumped back, leaving the brush tangled in my mane. “I’m sorry!” She squeaked. I looked over my shoulder to apologize for scaring her, even if it was her own fault to begin with, and she shrieked and ran. “What kind of feathering stories have ponies been telling about me?” I demanded, to absolutely no one. To my surprise, nobody answered. “You know, you should at least accept some of the blame for it.” A guard was standing in the doorway, watching the maid go. “I don’t think teleporting Vuvuzela into the ornamental pond was a good idea if you wanted him to stop yelling.” “I didn’t even know there was a pond.” “That’s surprisingly good aim, then. He could have landed in the cactus garden.” “Thanks.” I sighed, and started pulling at the manebrush, trying to yank it free. "I'll aim more to the left next time." The guard stepped over and rocked it loose, then started brushing with more confidence than the maid, if an order of magnitude less skill. “You don’t have to do that. It’s not your job” He shrugged. “As the only pony in armor, I’m the best qualified, right?” I laughed a little at that. “Sure. Maybe I’ll have you polish my hooves next.” “Don’t joke - personal grooming is something all guards have to learn. You can’t be in Celestia’s service unless you can look your best at all hours.” “What’s your name? You’re the only pony that doesn’t want to yell or run away.” “Flash Sentry. Pleased to meet you.” “Now you’re sure you can do this?” Flash asked. I rolled my eyes. “I don’t think there’s anypony that could mess it up.” “That’s what I thought about my first assignment. Just stand in one spot and don’t go anywhere for a few hours until somepony comes to switch with you.” He smiled. “I went through almost a year of training, and I ended up standing in front of some dusty room nopony had used since before I was born. I thought I’d done something wrong, and I was angry and upset.” “Are you really trying to teach me some kind of lesson?” I raised an eyebrow. “Just hear me out!” He laughed. “I requested reassignment, tried to figure out why I was being singled out, and eventually I was transferred to the patrols around the garden. I got to see ponies, actually walk around, talk to other guards. I thought I’d finally gotten back on track with my career.” “Hold on, I’ve heard this one before. Let me guess - after that it started raining every day?” “There was rain, as a matter of fact. But more importantly, a week after I got that transfer, Princess Luna came back and it turns out that dusty room was her bedroom. The post I’d been on became one of the most important in the palace, and I threw it away.” “You couldn’t have known.” “No. But sometimes you have to take things on faith. That includes having to sit and do nothing. I mean, they were going to have Princess Cadance do this, right? And they wouldn’t have her waste her time. That means you should treat this like it’s an important royal duty.” “Flash, it’s a parade.” “Exactly! A parade for you! So let’s see a smile!” I tried to smile, though it didn’t quite reach my eyes. “Hmm…” He inspected it critically. “Not bad. Are you sure about the cloak?” “Black is a good color on me. Somepony told me once it works at weddings, funerals, and everything in between.” I paused. “Besides, I didn’t really bring anything else to wear. Do you really want me to try squeezing into something fitted for Cadance? I don't have the figure, the wings, or the... pink.” “Well, just keep smiling and wave to the crowd and it’ll all be okay,” Flash decided. “I’ll be on the parade float with you. If something happens, let me deal with it, okay? I know you’d be able to handle it but it’s my job and I don’t want ponies thinking I’ve gotten lazy.” I snorted. “Fine. And you’re sure there’s no time to redecorate?” I looked up at the float. It was shaped sort of like one of those swan boats and covered in more shades of pink than I’d ever seen in one place before. “Do you have a spell that can do it in the ten seconds between now and when we have to leave?” I looked at the swan’s empty glass eyes and sighed. “I wish.” The crowds cheered. That’s what I’d like to say, anyway. What they did was line the streets and stare. I was starting to get a feeling for the town. The buildings here were all the same as the slums I’d been at last night, but they loomed taller above us because the road had been cleared of sand all the way down to a brick road the same white color as the bare stone I saw everywhere else. Banners and flags were hung from every window and wall, rope stretched overhead with ribbons dangling like curtains. I smiled and waved and the crowd responded with whispering and pointed hooves. “What am I doing wrong?” I hissed from the corner of my mouth, trying not to move my jaw. Things were already tense enough. If I stopped smiling they might stampede. “It’s a tough crowd,” Flash assured me. “Don’t let it get to you. We’re halfway to the palace. Just, uh, try not to insult the king.” “You say that like I was planning on it.” “No, no. I just want to make sure you’re planning on not doing it. It’s completely different.” I snorted in laughter and felt some of the muscles in my face unclench. “Hey, that’s even better,” Flash said. “A real smile looks nicer on you.” I shook my head and didn’t reply. There was no way I was going to be able to say anything without laughing or blushing like a filly or doing both. Flash had a lot of charm for a pony recruit. Maybe I was looking at it wrong. If I went out to see Songbird Serenade and she canceled at the last second and I only found out when they put somepony else on stage, I’d probably be upset even if the new pony was just as good. If I remembered the schedule correctly, there’d be another parade after all the events were over, and then ponies would know to expect me. I’d have to talk to Vuvuzela about doing a few minor magic tricks, maybe some fireworks and illusions, something to pump up the crowd. I was halfway through a mental lists of spells I could safely cast over the crowd when a tall pony in blue and white silk veils stumbled out into the street just ahead of the parade float. She tripped and fell with the kind of drama I was used to seeing from a certain seamstress, turning the misstep into a swoon. Flash reacted first, in the worst way. He stepped in front of me like he thought a fainting filly was some kind of real threat. I didn’t have time to yell at him. I teleported in front of the float and picked the mare up before she could get trampled. “Are you okay?” I asked, stepping to the side with her while the parade jerked and slowed to a halt. I helped by gently using my magic to gently help the dumb swan-float come to a halt like it had, again, gently, run into a brick wall. There probably wasn’t any permanent harm done except to the swan’s beak, which was now bent enough that it looked more like a shoehorn than a hornbill. The mare turned over in my magical grip, and I got my first good look at her. She was the most beautiful pony I’d ever seen, and I say that as a certified expert. I’d met supermodels, danced with Princesses, and this pony was so stunning it put them to shame. Her coat was a blue paled to almost white, with a sheen that made it gleam like brushed steel. The mare’s mane was stark black and as glassy as obsidian. “They’re after me!” she said, pointing back to the crowd. I followed her hoof and saw a half-dozen strong-looking figures in dark robes shoving their way through the assembled Saddle Arabians. As if they weren’t ominous enough wearing full masks in public, their robes were painted with wide snake prints, like somepony had used a stencil and spraypaint to tag them. Each wore a different color - white, red, green, yellow, blue, and black. “Let me guess,” I said. “Assassins?” The mare nodded, and the first of the masked killers jumped out of the crowd, who I’d mentally noted as Black Snake, spinning in the air and using the momentum to toss a javelin my way. I must not have been as famous as I thought, because when I caught it, I could feel there weren’t any enchantments, no special anti-magic metals, nothing that could pose a real threat. “What is this, amateur hour?” I asked. I snapped it like a toothpick and used the blunt end like a bat, cracking it across the first assassin’s chin and laying him out on the street. “Come on, put on a good show. We’ve got a whole crowd watching!” “Hold on, Miss Shimmer, I’m coming!” Flash yelled. He didn’t get far. Yellow Snake got in his way on the float, brandishing a long chain and whipping it through the air, keeping him pinned down and unable to take to the air. “You take that guy,” I shouted. “I got the rest!” The civilians were going to restrict my options, so I took a few steps back to the middle of the street and let the four assassins make their way out of the herd. There were plenty of spells I could have safely thrown into the crowd but most of them still wouldn’t have made me popular. Ponies don’t like being knocked out or glued to the ground even if it’s for their own good. “They’re very dangerous,” the mare in my magical grip warned. “You should--” “Just sit back and relax,” I said. I clapped my hooves, adding a little flair to setting off the explosive array I’d cast under one of the assassins. Blue Snake went flying, and I had some time to play around before I worried about where he was going to land. Green charged at the same time as Red. I immediately decided White was the smartest one, since he was hanging back and watching. My more pressing concern were the two curved swords being drawn from underneath dark robes. I threw a simple hex at them and watched the two assassins react in confusion as the steel in their blades magnetized, their weapons snapping together and refusing to come apart. A dozen more hidden daggers tore out of their robes and into the knot of steel. Their charge faltered as their torn clothing tangled their legs and sent them to the ground in a heap of groaning pony. “You should really know better,” I said. One of them tried to stand - I think it was Red, but most of his clothing was around his fetlocks - so I hammered them both into the ground with a force bolt. It wouldn’t kill them, but they’d be unconscious for hours. White gave me a look with his piercing green gaze, and I motioned for him to come at me. Instead, he produced a small flask and threw it to the ground at his hooves, smoke billowing as whatever alchemy was within hit the air. “You don’t get away that easily,” I said. I’d been keeping track of Blue, and I nudged his path back down to earth at the last minute. The falling pony flew into the mist and two horses tumbled out, White’s escape cut short by the crash landing. I threw a web spell across them to keep them in place, then turned my attention to Flash. “How you doing up there, bodyguard?” I teased. “This guy wasn’t a problem,” Flash said, from where he was sitting on top of the would-be killer, the pony restrained by his own chain. “You seemed like you were having fun, so I didn’t want to interrupt and get caught in the friendly fire.” “Thanks,” I said. “That was amazing,” the beautiful mare said, and then I remembered that I still had said beautiful mare to deal with. “All in a day’s work,” I said. I put her down on her hooves, brushing some of the dust off her silk… robes? Toga? If I knew more about fashion I’d know the name of whatever she was wearing. “You going to be okay?” “Yes, of course, I just… you defeated all six of them like it was nothing!” Her expression was just so precious I couldn’t help but laugh. “Don’t act like it’s a big deal. I’ve known foals that were more dangerous than those guys.” She looked flustered. If I didn’t know better, I’d think we were in the middle of a stageplay and she’d forgotten all her lines. “You sure you’re okay?” I asked. “Oh yes. Fine.” She coughed. “I was just… it’s such a relief! I must give you a reward--” I held up a hoof. “Don’t sweat the small stuff.” “Is that so?” She asked, shaking her head and looking amused. “You get home safe,” I said, teleporting back up to the float. Climbing was not an option with my bad leg acting up, and I wasn’t going to ask Flash to carry me. “If we meet again, I’ll buy you a drink and you can tell me how you ended up with assassins after you!” She bowed and got out of the way, letting the parade start up again. This time, the crowd cheered when I waved, and that made it all worth it. It was the first time I’d seen Vuvuzela smile. When he was happy, I could actually see why Celestia had made him an ambassador. He had the open, friendly face of somepony with nothing to hide. Somepony you could trust. “I was worried, but it seems I’m the one eating crow today,” the diplomat said. “An attack in the middle of the parade would normally be a disaster to any kind of treaty signing, but it was exactly what we needed.” “It felt good to cut loose a little,” I said, trotting along after him and trying not to stare. Now, I’m no country hick. I spent a good part of my life living in a palace, and then I spent even more living in another palace which was, admittedly, mostly in ruins. I’ve seen a lot of castles. This one was so opulent it made Canterlot look like a foal’s treehouse. When the parade stopped, it was less like we’d arrived at a building and more like we had come to the base of a vast cliff stretching as far as we could see in both directions with a gentle curve to the surface that let the ends vanish behind the buildings of the city. Instead of a fortress behind a protective wall, the palace was the wall itself, the central structure a tower as tall as a Manehattan skyscraper and with wings and balconies shielding the capital city from whatever lay beyond, though the size of it was like a statement that this was it, the edge of the world, and ponies in the city never had to think about what was outside. The Saddle Arabians had helpfully provided a way up that cliff. A staircase wound its way from landing to landing like a mountain trail edged in brass and silver. “That’s a lot of stairs,” I muttered. “A thousand, or so I am told,” Vuvuzela said. “I’ve never tried counting them myself. It takes several hours unless you’re a skilled athlete. The elite guards can do it in ten minutes. I’ve seen the drills.” “Let me guess, it’d be rude to just teleport to the top.” “You aren’t the first to ask that.” Vuvuzela craned his neck to look up. Way up. “The palace is warded in much the same way as Canterlot Castle. Teleportation would be all but impossible.” “I cracked Canterlot’s wards years ago.” “No doubt. I would ask that you avoid doing so here. It might be seen as espionage or even an act of war.” “It might be worth it. That’s a lot of stairs.” Three hours later, we were almost at the top, sweat was running down my neck, and I had come up with several elegant solutions for getting ponies to the top of the palace. Around the time my bad leg had gone from painful to totally numb I decided that a cannon shooting them through the air was the most effective method. “You have your lines memorized?” Vuvuzela whispered. I nodded, not trusting myself to speak. “As the representative, you have to go first,” he said. “Mister Sentry and I will be right behind you.” There was only one short flight left. I took the opportunity to look back over the city. From this high up, the details all blurred together and the city looked like a maze of white and black. Sun-bleached rooftops stretched to the glimmer of the sea, and a haze of dust and sand in the air gave it all a dream-like feeling. I took it all in, the wind at this altitude cold enough to help peel the sweat off my coat and leave me feeling less like I was going to collapse. I should have taken the time to learn spells to make myself presentable. Cadance probably knew a hundred different spells to make her mane stay put. If it hadn’t been for Flash I wouldn’t have even gotten it brushed. Horns blared above us in a tune I didn’t recognize. Vuvuzela met my gaze and I nodded, trotting up that last flight of stairs with my head held high. It was like walking into Canterlot’s throne room, except without the walls. A pavilion of polished stone as large as a city block, with pillows, benches, and a walkway leading to a raised platform upon which sat a brass and silver throne that looked practically like a fossil, like it had been dug up all in one piece from an era a million years in the past. The thin air and traces of wind tugging at silk shades hanging from ornate open frames made it feel like we were meeting near the summit of some great peak with the sky huge and open above us. The pony sitting in the throne wasn’t nearly as old, maybe twice my age and dressed all in violet and burgundy, a sharp contrast with his sky-blue coat. His crown was a simple twist of metal dark with age. I bowed. “King Zephyranthes, I bring greetings in the name of Her Royal Highness, Princess Celestia of Equestria. I present myself as a newcomer to your lands with the hope that I can further the strong relationship between our nations.” He paused for longer than I would have thought necessary before replying. “I welcome you with open hooves. There is no need to bow in my presence. You have already done a great service to my subjects.” His voice was deep and resonant and managed to carry even with the totally open floorplan. He’d also gone off-script. My next line was supposed to be about my credentials. I was going to have to improvise. “It was no great trouble, your majesty,” I said. “I couldn’t just watch idly while ponies were in trouble.” “Indeed. And instead of ordering your guards to help or calling for the local authorities, you took matters into your own hooves.” He leaned forward to look at me. “Princess Celestia is a cautious ruler, but she does produce subjects who strive to act on their own initiative. You do your nation proud, though I suspect seeing a beautiful damsel in distress made the decision somewhat easier.” I blushed a little at that. “I’d have done the same no matter who it was.” “Yes, I suspect you would have,” Zephyranthes agreed. “I don’t think you even stopped to ask the name of the pony you rescued.” “I was more worried about making sure she was safe. I’m sure if Your Highness wishes, I could find her again.” “There’s no need,” Zephyranthes said. He clapped his hooves twice, and that beautiful mare stepped out from where she’d been hidden behind the hanging veils. She wasn’t dressed the same way she had been at the parade. The plain robes had been replaced with ornate, embroidered patterns of dragons in flight and edged with silver jewelry and gems. Even with the translucent veil obscuring her mouth, I could tell it was the same mare. You don’t forget a face that hits you like a bolt of lightning. “Sunset Shimmer, you didn’t let me introduce myself to you properly,” she said. “My name is Princess Shahrazad.” “I cannot thank you enough for saving my daughter,” King Zephyranthes said. “She shouldn’t have been outside the palace and she somehow escaped the palace guard as well.” “Oh, well, I can’t say I haven’t done the same back when I lived in Canterlot…” I laughed a little, trying to cover up how flustered I was and wishing that Vuvuzela would step in and say something. “You refused a reward when last we met, but this time I wish to give you this.” Princess Shahrazad stepped up to me with her hips bobbing in a way that had to be absolutely intentional. Nopony in the world walked like that unless they were doing it on purpose, not even Cadance, and she had so much natural charm she got a dozen love letters every morning. She unclasped a pendant from her neck and offered it to me. It was a simple twist of silver around a glass bauble. It seemed harmless enough. I couldn’t sense any serious magic around it. “I’d be honored,” I said. I moved to take it and she shook her head, taking the opportunity to do it for me, leaning in with her breath tickling my ear and clasping the silver chain around my neck. “Excellent,” the King said. “This will mark a new age of peace between our nations. This treaty was merely going to grant us wealth, but I did not expect that I would be honored to find my daughter a fiancee at last.” A what? “Tonight, we feast in their honor!” Zephyranthes declared. A cheer went up around the palace, and ponies who I hadn’t seen at all seemed to melt out of thin air to begin setting up decorations and music. I looked at Shahrazad. She grinned, her eyes twinkling, and I smiled back because that’s what you do when your new fiancee, the most beautiful mare you’ve ever met, smiles at you. I was in so much trouble.