//------------------------------//
// Chapter 8 
// Story: No Reservations 
// by Snaproll 
//------------------------------//

As I plodded down the road, the wagon rattling along behind me, I glanced aside at our traveling companions, then over at Trixie. "So, let me get this straight. We're supposed to head out and see if we can investigate rumors of people infiltrating Equestria and the world at large from alternate dimensions." 

Trixie nodded. "Yes, that's right." 

"And we're starting our journey off at a small town two days walk from Canterlot." 

Another nod. "Your grasp of the obvious is remarkable." 

I let that one slide to keep pressing. "Despite the fact that the town in question is home to the-" 

"Elements of Harmony." I was pleased to see a twitch had developed in Trixie's left eye. Ah Hah! Her skin could be gotten under.

"Right, them. So, my question is, why start there? It's basically Canterlot's suburbs. Surely anything unusual would show up in the local newspapers?" 

Trixie gave me a level look as she spoke. "Well, in the last few years, Ponyville-" 

"Wait...It's called Ponyville? That's a little on the nose, isn't it?" 

"I didn't name it, shut up and let me explain." She took a deep breath through her nose before she continued. "The last few years, Ponyville" she said with a slight edge and a sideways look at me, to make sure I wasn't going to say anything sarcastic, "Has been the epicenter of the return of an elemental creature of darkness possessing one of the diarchs, ground zero for the living embodiment of Chaos...twice...local magical anomalies, the ascension of a new Alicorn princess, the battlefield for a magic-absorbing centaur escaped from Tartarus, a megalomaniacal little filly teaming up with the aforementioned centaur and a shape changing bug to overthrow the balance of Harmony, and the biggest Goof Off in the last thirty years." 

"Goof Off?" 

"Don't ask." 

"And", added a drily amused alto voice from my other side, "Two instances of a sorceress with delusions of grandeur unleashing havoc on the town." I was starting to get a better read on pony expressions, and Princess Luna seemed to be doing her level best to hold back a smile.

"Hey!" Trixie said, bristling. "The first one wasn't my fault! If those two chowder headed foals hadn't somehow managed to bring an Ursa Minor-." 

Celestia cleared her throat from her sister's left. "The point that Miss Lulamoon is trying to make is that even if there were hostile elements from outside our reality, recently it would be rather hard to tell if they were naturally occurring or simply a part of the natural weirdness of the place." 

I gave the two royal sisters a look as they walked alongside us. "And that's another thing. Why are you two coming along with us?'

Princess Luna hiked her tail and gave me a sidelong glance. "'Tis our royal perogative for an evening stroll, is it not?" 

In fairness, she had a point.1 it was definitely nearing high summer in Equestria, but we had passed the most oppressive heat of the day. Gentle breezes kept the worst of the heat off, along with the occasional tall trees that dappled the road beneath with shade, and the air was redolent of the smell of tree sap and the aroma of the local flora. As for the local fauna, birds wheeled and flitted from tree to tree, adding to the ambiance with their song. The sun was starting to sink towards the horizon, and it was just starting to get to the point where Princess Luna's description of time of day could be conceivably be called 'Evening'. Furthermore, my stomach reminded itself, I'd been towing a wagon since noon and that "Evening" also usually equated to "Suppertime" in my book.
1: She had wings too, but you probably knew that already.

That said, something didn't seem to add up. I couldn't be certain, but we'd probably covered something in the realm of twenty miles since we'd started our journey. Granted, the two regal sisters were certainly taller than the average pony and, given their previously hinted-at abilities, probably had the stamina to keep things up. But that was a rather long ways to go for a casual walk. And while nearly every pony we'd passed in public had bowed, curtsied, doffed their hats or otherwise abased themselves before the two, there was something...girlish in their manner that was increasingly at odds with their Royal Facade. I took further note of their appearance. 

"I notice Celestia that, while you are, as you said, retired, you're still decked out in jewels and finery." 

The alabaster mare arched an eyebrow at me as her golden torque glittered in the sun. "Come now, Comstock. Even back in your world, surely a lady is entitled to her accessories?" 

I nodded at that. "That's a fair point. But you both also appear to be laden with fully loaded and monogrammed saddle bags." 

Luna tossed her mane, which glittered like a starfield in the deepening twilight.2 "Pah! 'Tis every lady's obligation to be prepared for any hardship which might come her way." She nodded back to the wagon in Trixie's colors I was towing behind me. "Just because we don't travel with such a gaudy conveyance-" she ignored Trixie's huff with magnificent indifference "- doesn't mean that we should be ill prepared for the rigors of..." Celestia flicked a wing out and cuffed her sister's flank. 
2: Not that Twilight, get your minds out of the gutter.

Trixie gave them a sideways look. "The rigors of a casual evening stroll?"

Celestia rolled her eyes as she spoke. "All will be made clear soon enough. Suffice to say, Luna and I are taking a well-deserved holiday. A very long holiday" 

Trixie gave them a level look. "A holiday." 

Luna nodded, recovering her composure. "Yes. I'm sure you're familiar with the concept. A pony leaves their normal routine and goes somewhere where they can sit on the beach, catch up on their reading or their sleep." She looked thoughtful for a moment. "Though I've heard rumors that one can now purchase tropical adult beverages with tiny umbrellas in them now. 'Twould be fun to sample a few." 

Something didn't add up. "And...you're going to vacation in Ponyville?" 

Celestia smiled, her eyes distant. I followed her gaze down into the valley below to where the road we were following wended its way between hills and gullies. A town lay spread below us, nestled up against a wild looking forest. In the distance, I could see a train gliding across the tracks as it pulled into the town station. Smoke curled from the chimneys as lamp lights started to light up. The road passed through the town, as did the railroad. Most impressive, however, was the massive crystalline structure that dominated the skyline. Standing stories above the thatched roof cottages and storefronts, it resembled nothing so much as a massive, gnarled, hoary oak tree, rendered in angular crystal. The sun glinted off of its spires and, in a flash of intuition, I realized that this must be our destination. 

"No," Celestia spoke, coming out of her reverie, "Though we have been to Ponyville plenty of times and would be more than welcome, Luna and I are planning our sojurn somewhere more relaxing." She levitated a pocket watch out of her saddlebags and contemplated it. "We will take our leave of you presently, but for now we should keep going." 

I nodded, another thought occurring to me. "I mean, that looks like a pretty fair distance yet. I don't think we'd make it until midnight at least." 

Luna nodded. "Certainly, which is why we've made arrangements for the two of you." 

Trixie and I traded a look, and spoke in unison. "Arrangements?" 

Ahead, the trail curled around a small rise, and I suddenly became aware I could smell woodsmoke accompanied by the smell of roasting vegetables. My stomach howled in furious need and I found myself quickening my gait. 

Around the corner awaited an unusual sight. At least, by my recent standards. 

A pair of robed, bearded unicorns sat beside an uncovered, two wheeled wagon, tending a merrily burning campfire. One, gray furred, clad in a gray robe and peaked hat, was smoking a long stemmed pipe as he tended the fire and stirred the cast iron pot hanging over the fire from a tripod. His mane, tail and beard were long, flowing and white, and he wore a pointed, wide brimmed hat. I couldn't see his full expression under the brim of his hat, but as far as I could tell, he was built with plenty of apparent muscle, and only a fool would have written him off for his age. Though he was sitting down, I could tell he would have towered over me had he been standing. 

The other unicorn was taller and more slender. He was clad in a midnight blue robe and hat spangled with silver stars. Both were strung with a series of small, silvery bells at the hem and rim. Though he wasn't as muscled as his gray clad compatriot, his silvery beard was thicker and better tended enough to raise his personal levels of majesty. As we rounded the corner, he noticed us and came to his hooves. "Princesses Celestia and Luna! Hail, and be welcome at our camp." 

As we approached, the gray clad unicorn came to his hooves as well, snorting smoke out his nostrils. We were near enough I could hear him mutter under his breath as he tapped out the ashes from his pipe and stowed it up one of his sleeves. Celestia waved at the two of them. "Starswirl! it's been too long!" There was something...girlish in her manner, like she could barely conceal her excitement. A second glance showed me she was blushing ever so slightly. Luna hung back from her sister, giving the gray robed unicorn an appraising look, much like he was a car she was deciding to take for a test drive, or something interesting she was debating ordering on the menu at a restaurant. 

The gray robed unicorn spoke as we grew nearer. "You're later than we expected you to be." 

Celestia gave him a blazing, sunny grin. "Well, a Princess is never late, my friend. Nor is she early. She arrives precisely when she means to." 

The unicorn with all the bells on barked a laugh that he turned into a cough. "My apologies, friend. I might have passed that particular nugget on to her when she was in her...formative years." 

The gray unicorn shook his head, irritation on his face. "If nothing else, they certainly seem as beautiful as you said, Pallandro." 

The blue belled unicorn kicked him in the shins with his forehoof. "I told you, it's Starswirl here. I didn't go parading around from Eriador to Harad calling you Olórin, did I?" 

The gray unicorn gave him a look, and then sighed. "Hail, Princesses Celestia and Luna. Hail and be welcome at our fire." He then glanced at me and Trixie, then waved a hoof dismissively. "Oh. And your chattel." 

Trixie bristled. "Chattel! I've got half a mind to-" 

I clamped a hoof over her mouth, some unknown instinct warning me that these two were dangerous. "Thank you, honored elder, and we are welcome." I looked sideways at Trixie giving me a panicked, questioning look, and muttered out the corner of my mouth "Don't give these guys guff. They're more dangerous than they look." Her eyebrows quirked in a silent question, but she nodded and I removed my hoof from her mouth. 

I brought the wagon around to the edge of the fire and shrugged myself out of the traces, grateful that I didn't have to go through the trouble of having to set the wagon down gently had it been mounted on a single axle. 

I took a moment to...well, not admire the other wagon sitting by the fire, but appraise it. It stood over a single axle, with high sides and cargo piled high, covered with a canvas tarp. The timbers were worn, the wheels made of five separate planks banded together with steel, and the axle was un-sprung. More curious was a mark burnt into the tailgate. It resembled a tree with two upward-curving branches on the right side of the trunk, or perhaps a menorah if someone had removed all but the first two arms on the right. It seemed familiar, somehow, but I couldn't quite place it. Given that and my previous intuition, I knew it added up to something, but damned if I knew what it was. 

"Something on your mind, young man?" I turned to regard the stallion slowly with a raised eyebrow, and without flinching and yelping.3

3: This hoofnote left intentionally left blank.

After getting my heart rate under control, I glanced over at the gray clad unicorn, who was giving me a shrewd look. "Just...woolgathering, sir." 

Something satisfied flickered across his expression, but vanished quickly. "Well, you certainly seem to know enough to show respect for your elders, at any rate." He gestured towards the trio of mares. Celestia was chatting animatedly with Starswirl while Luna and Trixie looked on, bemused and trying to get a word in edgeways, respectively. "You seem to have fallen in with interesting people." 

I smiled, despite my earlier misgivings, and nodded towards his bell clad companion. "If you don't mind my saying so, I could say the same for yourself, sir." 

The gray clad unicorn rolled his eyes. "Pal-ahem, forgive me, Starswirl has always been a bit of an odd duck. Even worse than Aiwendil, if you would believe it. Although..." His voice trailed off as he took in the glade around us, the birds singing their evening song in the trees, and the rustic village below us "If I am being completely honest, he would have enjoyed this trip as well. Unfortunately, he would very much have been a...what is the expression? Ah yes...a third wheel." 

Something like a mental puzzle piece clicked into place. "Third wheel?" I followed his gaze over toward Luna, then glanced back at him. His expression was contemplative, though his eyes roamed over the dusky mare, and I decided to risk saying my thoughts out loud. "Wait, so you...and Starswirl...are going on a date with..." I glanced over at the two alicorns, and back. "With them?!" I finished, because I am a talented wordsmith and not because I was gobsmacked. 

"Is that so shocking to you?" 

"Well..." I rubbed the back of my neck with a hoof, and increasingly feeling like I was tapdancing on thin ice in red-hot shoes. My conversational counterpart, meanwhile, looked drily amused and perfectly willing to let me continue my Fred Astaire impression. "I mean, don't take this the wrong way, but aren't they out of your league?" 

"Out of my league?! Nonsense!" And with that, as all other eyes turned towards us, he cast aside his gray cloak. There he stood, grown suddenly tall. His hair and beard fairly gleamed white in the late evening sunlight, and underneath, glowing nearly as bright, was a white casual shirt patterned with tropical flowers in silver, as well as the wide brimmed, gray banded panama hat. His cutie mark, likewise, caught the evening light: a crossed staff, sword, and massive firework.  I took an involuntary step back, bathed in his glow,  feeling quite sure that I knew precisely who he was. 

The entire glade was silent for a full thirty seconds, before Luna's wings flared in what seemed to be an involuntary reaction, naked admiration and interest spread across her delicate features. Meanwhile Starswirl came to his hooves, his eyes threatening to roll clear out of his skull. "Really? Do you ever tire of that Sudden Reveal act?" 

He turned to regard Starswirl, and somehow the brightness diminished. "Well, no, not really. You only get two or three chances to pull it off properly." 

Starswirl snorted. "Oh of course. That's why you were wearing your robes over that Haywai'ian shirt." He shook his head, then crooked a foreleg for Celestia. "Well, my dear, I would say that it was time we were going, wouldn't you?" 

Celestia was keeping a studiously straight face, though I could hear the laughter threatening to bubble up as she spoke, threading her foreleg through Starswirl's. "Oh, most definitely. Coming, Luna?" 

Luna had, meanwhile, gotten her wings under control and she regally paced over towards myself and my interlocutor. "Not before being first introduced to the stallion who is to serve as my...escort." Her eyes smoldered as she said the last word and held a regal forehoof up, and the unicorn next to me straightened briefly before sweeping his hat from his head and bowing deeply. "I have been called many names in my time. I am the servant of the Secret  Fire, wielder of the Flame of Arnor." He took  Luna's forehoof in his own, and bestowed it with a kiss, while his eyes met hers. "You may call me whatever you wish, for currently, I burn only for yourself." 

Luna maintained her composure for a bare second, then danced in one place, squealing like a teenager. "Oh...Oh Celly, I like this one!" She grabbed him by the foreleg, and with a crack of displaced air, the two vanished. Trixie and I glanced at each other, before I looked back at Celestia. "Um...your Highness, before you go, I've got a question." 

She turned to politely regard me over Starswirl's shoulder. "Oh, by all means, Comstock, ask away." 

I glanced at Starswirl, then back to her. "Well, if I understand it, I'm here to see if folks from my reality have been making it to yours." 

"Yes, that's correct." She said, in a tone reminiscent of a kindergarten teacher with a particularly slow student just starting to grasp that two and two were four. 

"Well, it occurs to me that Starswirl and his...companion would present a fairly significant incursion." 

Starswirl nodded. "Young man, you would be correct, but for one thing." He nodded at Celestia before smirking. "We are here at her invitation." 

Celestia nodded. "Quite so. So there's no need for you to inform me in this particular case." She patted Starswirl's foreleg with her own. "We should be going, Swirly. If we don't hurry, Luna's going to hit the buffet like a wrecking ball." 

Starswirl snorted. "Only if she doesn't beat him there. The man's an absolute fiend when it comes to horse d'oeuvres." He gave me a look and nodded towards their abandoned wagon. "By the by, if you would be so kind as to bring that wagon to Ponyville for us? The contents are due for the Ponyville Summer Wrap Up Festival, and I'm afraid that we won't be available to deliver them." 

I could do nothing but nod. Trixie, meanwhile was just picking her jaw off the floor as Celestia gave us both a sunny smile. "Have fun, you two! And try not to blow up any part of town." And with that, the two vanished in another crack, leaving Trixie and myself alone in the clearing with the two wagons. 

I huffed out a breath, and then swore. 

Trixie glanced over at me, clearly on edge, "WHAT!? What now?" 

I laughed at myself, ruefully. "And I didn't even get his autograph. Come on. At least they left us dinner."

We both moved over to the cast iron pot stewing over the fire. Trixie gave it an apprehensive sniff. "What is it?"

Using my forehoof, I picked up the ladle and gave the pot an experimental stir, then brought it to my lips and sipped. Of course. "Potatoes."