//------------------------------// // Chew It Over With Twixie // Story: Appledashery // by Just Essay //------------------------------// "Rainbow Dash?!" Twilight Sparkle clenched her teeth. "Are you out of your pony mind?" "Why, is it spring?" Rainbow Dash blinked at her from across the library. "I only shed my skull once a year." "She nearly destroyed Ponyville!" "So give her a banana sticker!" Rainbow gestured with a hoof. "'Nearly Destroying Ponyville' is... like... the chic thing to do these days. Heck, even you earn that achievement a few times each week!" "Grrrrrrrrr... Rainbow, I'm serious! Where did you even find her?!" "Living alone and destitute in a miserable town full of rocks." Rainbow's eyes narrowed. "Because her home and possessions had been utterly demolished." "And you think that's our fault?!" "No, but it still totally sucks." Rainbow sighed. "Look, I'm not asking that she live here in the library. There's a motel up the road for that. But she needs a way to earn her keep, and 'sorting rocks' totally isn't it!" "This town already has a magically gifted unicorn, thank you very much." "Yeah? And aren't you always on call with Princess Celestia to do freaky magic quests here, there, and everywhere?" "Erm..." Rainbow Dash smirked. "You can't be everywhere at once, Twilight! Think of her as..." Rainbow tapped her chin in thought, then brightened. "Your apprentice!" Twilight's eyes were straight as razors. "My apprentice..." "Sure!" Rainbow grinned. "Admit it! She's pretty darned talented! But with your tutelage to put her on the straight and narrow, who knows what Trixie is capable of!" From across the way, the blue unicorn harumphed: "The Great and Powerful Trixie finds this place far too dusty for the living, but it will have to do! When do we begin with the cosmic explosions?! Trixie is a fast learner!" Twilight frowned at Rainbow Dash. The pegasus smiled awkwardly. "Look, I didn't say it'd be easy..." "This is too large and stupid of a thing to be dumping in my lap, Rainbow!" Twilight snarled. "Don't you think I have enough on my plate?" "Doing what? Learning lessons on friendship?" "Precisely!" "Well, whoopty-dominoes!" Rainbow beamed. She hovered circles around the unicorn. "Here you have the opportunity for the best, most awesome lesson on friendship ever!" "Eh?" Twilight winced. "How do you mean?" "Think about it. What could possibly be a bigger... awesomer lesson than one where you bring the light of friendship to the mind of a unicorn so full of herself that she'd need a miner's helmet to climb back out?" "Hrmmmmm..." "It's difficult for a reason, but not beyond you!" Rainbow smiled. "You're Twilight Sparkle! Princess Celestia's prized student! Why waste your talents on writing about golden tickets and parasprite attacks?!" Rainbow pointed across the way at the blue unicorn. "Here's your biggest lesson ever right here! Show her the ropes... both the magical ones and the social ones... and everypony stands to improve from it! Trixie will learn a gazillion things. You will learn a gazillion things! Celestia will have even greater reasons to squee in delight over her favorite apprentice's tenacity... assuming princesses even squee." "Hmmmmm..." Twilight tapped her lavender chin. "Don't you get it?" Rainbow smirked. "This is win-win-win for everypony involved! And the best thing is... Trixie won't have to be miserable and alone anymore! I mean... isn't that the whole Friendship is Magic schtick is about?" "It is, Rainbow, but..." "But nothing!" Rainbow folded her forelimbs and smirked. "Don't make me ask the most talented unicorn in Fillydelphia or Trottingham to do this instead!" "But... Fillydelphia and Trottingham don't have talented unicorns..." "I can go lookiiiiiiiiing..." Rainbow winked. Twilight Sparkle sighed, gazing across the way at Trixie. Her ears drooped. "...and you say she's willing to be my apprentice?" She gulped. "I mean... with an ego like hers?" "Ungh! You have the Celestial Treatises of Starswirl as a Second Edition?! What kind of library is this?!" Rainbow winced. "Well... sure, it won't be like training Fluttershy, but honestly... Trixie's got a lot of super-duper talent beneath all of that abrasiveness. I truly believe that if there's anypony who can bring it out of her, it's you, Twilight. And only you." Twilight gazed across the library. Rainbow Dash bit her lip. At last, the unicorn exhaled through her nostrils. "Okay. I'll give it a try." "Woohooo!" "But she doesn't live here." Twilight glared up at the pegasus. "You brought her to this town. I'll leave finding her a place to crash on your plate." "Pffft." Rainbow shrugged. "I'm not hungry anyway." "Really, though..." Twilight smirked slightly. "Having an apprentice of my own has... a nice ring to it." "Always two there are." "Huh?" "Ahem... s-sorry. Just winging it." "And I'm sorry if I sounded mad at you, Rainbow," Twilight said. "You've been AWOL a lot lately. And suddenly you show up with... with THIS." Twilight shuddered. "It kind of threw me for a loop." "Hey. Some of us are really busy these days." Rainbow shrugged. "So what if I decided to share the love." "Y'know, Rainbow..." "Hmmm?" Twilight smiled tranquilly up at her. "Going out of your way to find a unicorn who had lost everything and then sacrificing your time and energy to bring her out of that pit...?" "Yeah? What about it?" "I can't think of anything more loyal." Rainbow fidgeted. "Uhm... let's just say I owe Trixie." "Like what?" Rainbow blinked. A few seconds later, she blurted. "An unforgettable favor." Twilight merely smiled. "I'll take your word for it." "Well... I gotta skate." "I figured you had to." Twilight sighed. "Just... don't become a stranger, Rainbow." "I'll try not to be." "Uh huh." As Rainbow darted out the door, Twilight stepped up to Trixie. "So, Trixie... where to begin? Oh! I know! Lesson One! Basic teleportation spells!" "Ungh! Trixie is not about to risk materializing inside one of this town's manure-reeking buildings!" "... ... ...Lesson Zero. Common Etiquette." Trixie gulped and blushed, ears folded. "The Great and Humble Trixie is listening..."