Autophobia

by Ice Star


Millennium

when she comes home
broken beyond all hope of repair
so small inside
heart shrunken and withered
with nopony to love
now that she knows
that she failed
as a sister

she's weak
but only on the inside
frayed threads of black
and white

little absolutes
that barely manage to keep her together
but never do they cross, if they could at all

insignificant
towering over everypony
her shadow is a blanket
a shroud that covers the coffin
of each and everypony
she has ever loved
at one point
or another

even if it took so long
to realize any of it
and how much she had
and how much she would never see
only to be told through ink-scribbled runes
that would crumble behind archive doors
while she sat on the throne

her wish from before it all
achieved
alone
her greatest fear, a reality
alone

everything she e/never wanted
before her
around her
ever after

she sits and smiles
glad in gold regalia with a shining new urn of a city
gilded around the edges of her heart
caught betwixt death's throes for what could only be
time, everlasting

pearlesent teeth gleam to each visitor
to squeeze back the tears she wants to cry
little drops of unshed poison
to nourish a loveless goddess

she loves each little pony
no matter how much they stab her back
all she can
taking the first steps these regal chains will allow
to make them change
no matter the sacrifice

no. matter. the. sacrifice.

so outwardly she sits and smiles
with a kindly wave
now and again
passively looking onward
since the fire in her is dying
along with the murmurs
of there ever being another
as the name that should have mattered the most to her
is struck from every record
she knows no hope, the mare in gold
just smiles and sacrifice
her belief in magic severs with each passing year
with no more answers to come

and she'll wait forevermore