• Member Since 22nd Apr, 2012
  • offline last seen 9 minutes ago

Nyronus


Greetings World. You may call me Nyronus. I write stories, among other things. My hobbies include existential ennui, being Princess Luna, and Saving the World. Feel free to hit me up on Steam to chat!

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Source

Rainbow Dash has become quite the mare since joining the 'Bolts. Brave, loyal, charming, and the fastest flier in all of Equestria to boot, and Spitfire would be lying if she said she didn't admire that and didn't find that more a little attractive.

Not that she has a crush or anything.

So after a good night out on the town, Spitfire decides to make an offer to Rainbow Dash to do something special. It's an offer Dash can't really refuse.

Unfortunately there are a couple factors Spitfire didn't account for.

A story of sex, friendship, small talk, and aggressive awkwardness.

Gracious thanks to CarcinoGeneticist for his proofreading support.

Part of the Shelf Cleaning Initiative

Chapters (1)
Comments ( 52 )

Well, this was definitely nice.

Nice.
This whole fic is a tease, though. Has all the talking bits, but no... action. :yay:

Oh well... :rainbowlaugh:

Does very well building it up and leaves it just at the right time.
It's really interesting to see Dashs thought patterns here. And the thought that Spitfire considers herself a cougar hilarious.

Wing #4 · Jan 18th, 2016 · · ·

A couple typos still linger, but that aside... I really like the antics between Spitfire and Dash in this. I think my favorite line is Spits telling Dash that she doesn't have to have sex with a bunch of ponies just to look impressive. There were really two battles here that we got to see: the battle between Spits and Dash, and the very interesting battle between Spits and herself. :)

This was extremely awkward and amazingly adorable at the same time. :raritystarry:

That was cute. :yay:

I’m honestly impressed you came in her at all.

:pinkiegasp:

A clopfic with no clop...

Will wonders never cease?

Just teasing; this was actually pretty good.

I reviewed this story!

My review can be found here.

“Look, I’m sorry I acted like that. It was feathering stupid of me. I’m honestly impressed you came in her at all.”
( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

Spitfire can't stop being cracking jokes even if the situation seems serious.
Reminds me of someone I know. Or better said, someone I see in every mirror I happen to look into :rainbowlaugh:

Still, a fun little story, and Dash's reactions are just too adorable!

Well you see Dash, when a mare and mare love each other very much, they do a special kind of hug until the both of them scream for Celestia-

:rainbowlaugh:

This story is funny and kind cute. and 120% awesome.

6847212 nice profile pic

Careful, a commanding officer putting the moves on a subordinate is a big no-no.

6854960 For military at least, we don't really know if the author sees the Wonderbolts as just a stunt flier team or more than that.

6854854 you're welcome. Edit: :pinkiehappy:

i have my settings on "View Mature" to "Off".

y i stil see dis stori lel

6856077 Because it's rated Teen. It's not porn.

6854960 Depends what rank Rainbow is. Commissioned officer/enlisted is a no-no. Commissioned officer/commissioned officer is (generally) alright.

Sequel! Get to the good parts!

6858205

You mean the parts where Spitfire and Rainbow Dash become a classy, world touring adventurer couple living a life of romance, excitement, and passion, right? Or how about their wedding where Dash carries the bride to the Honeymoon, from the reception, via Sonic Rainboom? Oh oh, what about if they decide to adopt kids?

These are the good parts, right?

6858219 The adorabetus ship shall not be sunk!

I've not actually read much of this pairing and this was a good story to start on. Liked it--really felt genuine. (Also I totes hear you on the little financial aside, funny how the little things can be fun like that.)


And that ending line? Perfect.

6854960

Or a big 'yes yes' in the bedroom.

6854138 I noticed that as well, talk about a typo. :rainbowlaugh:

Im not a big fan of the ship but I liked it a lot !!! :rainbowkiss:

At first I was kind of hesitant to read this. Not because it was a Dash x Spitfire ship. God knows how many of those I've read. It was because I was unsure if you could pull of this story well. I knew from the title, it was going to be a story about Rainbow Dash's first time. But the thing is, many authors that write these kinds of stories are virgins, and most of the time, single, which means that they have almost no experience, or solid idea to base the story off of.

But after reading this story, even though, I'm a virgin,(I've been saying virgin, basically meaning, never participated in, or been offered sex.), and have only had one girlfriend, I can say that this story was pulled off, very well. The awkwardness of such a conversation, the pauses, the mess ups when attempting to speak, and the anxiety when confronting such a situation are all captured in this story. It was a very natural conversation, and I was pleasantly surprised to see you even gave Spitfire's thoughts too.
The pacing was perfect, and you end the story at the perfect time.

Overall. I think this is an amazing read, and I can safely say, this earned a like, favorite, watch, and maybe a spot on my top 10 favorite stories.

Well done, and I wish thee a similar luck on future stories.

6858219 *in a hushed whisper* Hey, are you, you now, cruelly gonna write that stuff? If you are, you might just be finding yourself with another follower.

You really don't see this kind of subtle awkwardness from other stories and in movies; characters just acting like adults before sex. Usually it just shoves em right in there, consequences be damned. That is more than enough to give this a like and a fave.

Hohohohoho, oh man... this... this was ten tons of yes! :yay:
Hahaha, faved, damn good writing my good sir! :heart:

I LOVE this! Won't lie, almost expected it to go further, but as is, it really is a gem. :pinkiesmile: You really did nail the dynamic though. Haven't read dialogue written that well in a long time! Seeing Dash's confidence and bravado knocked down in a single sentence was just great. :rainbowlaugh: You've earned yourself a follower, and if you ever write a sequel, I'll read it without a second thought.

That was so awesome ! You nailed the bold type that Spitfire and Dash would have, doing akward explanation, jokes at each other and such. it really was a lovely fanfic, very romantic. Thank you.

Beautifully written! "ild and strong" should be "wild and strong", though.

A might more at ease than she had been when she came through the door.

That should be "A mite more comfortable"

That was a bloody good read. Short, sweet, the characters perfectly human (pony?) in their manners. I love the way Spitfire talks/thinks to herself after she enters the apartment, very well executed.
Above any specific praise I could give, I would just say that you are good at writing people (or ponies). Something that really makes a story is when the characters feel like real beings who could exist somewhere, and you have definitely pulled that off. I say, Sir, good show! :moustache:

You know, I think this is just about perfect as it is.

DAMMIT!! RIGHT WHEN IT WAS GETTING GOOD!.....well done.:pinkiehappy:

Very good story ;)

I really wanted to hear more about the 401K and which type or portfolio she used for her stocks.

Most entertaining...but be honest...that's actually Cloud Kicker, isn't it? :rainbowlaugh:

As for me, I'm still waiting for more info on Spitfire's investment portfolio.

Awwww - so cute!

Brilliant!

Instant favorite ...

Definitely one of the best Spitfire x Rainbow stories I’ve read :pinkiehappy:

Thanks for writing, and I think it finished at just the right point! The amount of detail that went into Spitfire making those drinks was delightful :twilightsmile:

Rainbow Dash was a piece of work. Lean even by the standards of pegasi, she was more cat than pony.

Meow!

Dash's mane fascinated her. It was almost like a second Rainbow Dash: cool and loose at rest, swept back and determined when the chips were down, and wild and strong with joy. Dash's mane, like everything else about her, was every inch Rainbow Dash.

She has a point.

“Dash... do you... even know what 'coffee' means?”
“That you wanted to serve me coffee?”
A moment of silence hung in the air.
[...]
“Dash, 'coffee' means sex.”
Dash suddenly sprung backwards, wings flaring and flapping in panic like a startled bird.

But the jump was like the aforementioned cat, right?
And is it bad I didn't get that reference either?

Dear Celestia. I don't know if that is the most adorable or the hottest thing I've ever seen...

Don't worry, those things aren't exclusive to each other; means they can be both.

“Just wanted to get away from me with my sleek, toned body and my years of experience? Wanted to avoid the pain of screwing all night like an animal?”

“Why did you come in, Dash?”
Dash said nothing, and took another gulp of her hot cocoa.
“That drink won’t last forever.”

:rainbowwild:: "Try me!"


Good story!
I enjoyed reading it.

Fun internal monologue of Spitz here.

Mmm, stock markets, hot chocolate, and retirement. Love me some REAL fillyfooling.

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