A filly lives in a lab. She's lived in that lab all her life. The lab just happens to be on Earth. She wants to go home.
Raised to rated T and added the dark + sex tag for the most recent chapter/story arc.
Don't worry though, it's nothing smexy or anything. I don't write that kinda stuff. It's just Gadget beating up a kidnapper.
So I'm apparently a horse, for obvious reasons. But at the same time, I've got both a human-level intelligence, and control over what this show calls "magic".
it's weird, but for now, the biggest thing on my mind is going home.
"Professor," A man spoke as he slid open the door, "we've received notice of a strange being spotted in a local neighborhood."
Professor Delmar, a middle-aged man of relatively tall stature, didn't respond. His body was draped over his desk, a cold cup of coffee sitting near the glowing monitors. On said monitors were various graphs and charts, updating every three seconds. It was monitoring their current project; the levitation of small objects using minimal force.
Levitation has been done before. In fact, quite a few times, even by amatuers. In principle, the most basic form of levitation is simply the repelling forces of two magnets within a restricted area, allowing the upper magnet to "float" without falling out of range. Though in this case, the magnets were instead being used to create waves of ultrasound, which had been proven prior to have the strength to carry small objects.
"Delmar. Wake up."
The professor groaned as he lifted his head from the desk, a small imprint of his sleeve criss-crossing his face.
"What?" Delmar grumbled, taking a sip of his coffee. It had been a long night for him, and he wasn't amused by the rude awakening.
"Like I said," the man continued, "we've been notified of a strange being within the city."
Delmar rolled his eyes, exhaling loudly before standing up. He silently brushed past the man in the doorway, heading for the communications room.
"So it's true?"
"Yes."
The professor didn't make eye contact with the Communications Manager. He was too busy searching the papers for signs of a mistake.
"No, it can't be..."
"Well, it is, so suck it up, old man."
The papers in the professor's hands all pointed to the same thing: an animal that's visibly similar to equines, but appeared to have unmatched powers in the quantum field. Namely, there had been signs of it levitating objects, teleporting, and even on rare occasions, creating shimmering barriers of solidified light.
Basically, Delmar thought, it's living proof of the quantum theory.
"Take me there." Delmar finally said, startling the Comm. Manager.
"I can't," the other man replied, "I'm just the guy who passes along information. You'll have to find it yourself."
The professor turned without a word, and left the room.
"Professor?"
Professor Delmar drowsily gazed out the window of the bus. He hadn't eaten breakfast yet, and on top of that, he left his coffee back in his office. The most he could do at the current moment was to stay alert, taking into account that the creature that the papers talked of seemed to have the capability to run long distances, as well.
"Arriving at Bus Stop 23-A. All passengers leaving at the moment, please remain in line as the doors open."
That was his stop. Delmar stood up, waiting with the few other people for the bus to park before opening its doors.
After stepping out, Delmar took a quick glance about his surroundings, hoping that he had found the correct place. A dim flash of light caught his eye. Turning, he saw nothing but an empty stretch of sidewalk. A rock flew past his face, startling him as he ducked out of the way.
"Who's there?!" he shouted, pulling out a handgun. He may have been a scientist, but it didn't mean that he wasn't allowed to have a concealed weapons permit.
The snap of a twig caused him to twirl around, sending bullets shredding into the unkempt grass that blanketed the derelict buildings. The few people that had also come out of the bus stared, but never said a word as they quickly shuffled away from the seemingly deranged man.
Delmar, after seeing that he hit nothing but the grass, turned back, only to face what appeared to be a small, teal unicorn.
The unicorn stuck its tongue out, blowing a raspberry before disappearing in a blinding flash of light.
"WAIT!" Delmar shouted, spinning around once more to try and spot the unicorn, "WAIT!"
It was gone. The professor sighed, pulling his phone out. As he keyed in the password, he felt a warm breath blow down his spine. He froze at the sensation, knowing that the unicorn was likely perched on the fence post behind him. reaching down with his free hand, Delmar quickly pulled out a small taser, and stunned the unicorn.
"GOTCHA!"
"And that's why you're here now. You've been a bad little filly, and we caught you after you harassed one of their top scientists."
The filly did nothing but stare. Stare, with its large, puppy-like eyes... likely into the soul of the animal catcher.
"Aw, what am I doing? I'm talking to a freakin' unicorn, here. I'm probably losing it..." The man said to himself as he shut the trunk of the van.
The filly, though quite young, and unable to talk due to age, was able to pick up magical abilities at an amazing pace, copying her parents throughout her early years. She charged her horn, ready to simply teleport out the van. She couldn't.
In confusion, the filly looked about. She was still in the steel-wire kennel that she was put in, and combined with the Faraday Cage-like effect of the van's body, she was unable to pinpoint a location to teleport to.
She was trapped, and would likely be so for the rest of her life.
"Hey Rob," she heard coming from the front of the van, "what do you think they'll do with the unicorn?"
"Probably dissect it or something. Professor Delmar said that he saw the thing teleport with his own eyes."
...Yeah, let's just say that the only reason why I'm here now is that I was being a clumsy, cheeky little filly after traversing realities.
They say that I was found in a gritty ol' pasture, even when I remember being tazed by that crazy scientist. They don't know that I can talk, or really even understand English. To them, I'm just another pet; some sort of weirdly intelligent horselike animal that happens to be cute and cuddly. They already know that I have feelings, however, after quite a few tests that they had brought upon me. I still shudder at the thought of some of them.
I'm feeling bored of this life. I know that there's more out there, past those all too familiar whitewashed walls and security cameras. There's a whole world out there to explore, and I'm pretty eager to see it for myself. I don't remember very much from my days before I was holed up here, but I do remember the smell of the outside. It was... fresh, as I've heard the people here say. I've smelled my fair share of air fresheners that've claimed to "bring the outdoors inside", but honestly, if you ask me, those things are just ripoffs.
What I want is, as this one particular internet meme has stated before, is out.
I want the out.
I awoke with the usual blinding lights of my room. Bright, fluorescent, y'know, the typical lab-lights. Being that I was more of a 'feel-good' pet that they kept around than an actual lab animal. Due to my tinkering nature, I was named "Gadget" soon after I arrived, mostly because my levitation skills were still a bit haywire at the time. I obviously have much better control of it now, and I mostly just help around.
Though I'm content with my current life, I've said many times before; it gets boring. Day after day, I wake up, follow some random guy around to tote a cup of coffee for him, then return to my little corner of the lab complex. I occasionally get some nice ear scratches in return for my work, but I typically just get semi-friendly grunts in return. Some of the guys around me stare sometimes, which just sends shivers up my spine.
Today was to continue as usual, no different from any other day... That is, aside from a little surprise pancake for my birthday. It's still nice to know that these guys treat me fairly. After finishing the pancake and licking up all that delicious whipped cream, I went off to take a shower. The people running this place used to send someone with me to keep an eye on me in case if I got chaotic, but they trust me now with the handheld shower heads in the medical research wing.
A quick run of shampoo later, and I was back to smelling like strawberries. If you ask me though, I'd have to say that I like to smell like mechanical grease and singed fur. I really don't know why though... I think it might've been from the looks of the scientists' faces after I short circuited a backup generator when I was seven.
Either way, I smell like strawberries now, so yeah. Not gonna be smelling like that anytime soon.
I trotted out of the medical wing with my saddlebag, concealing a copy of a textbook I had *ahem* borrowed from their engineering department. They gave me the saddlebag years ago to make it easier for me to carry things around, before I was good at levitation. But now that I don't really carry anything else in it anymore, they kinda forgot that I even have it. Sooooooo... I pretty much have a way to sneak things around for myself.
As for the rest of the morning, I split the time up into reading the textbook in my "secret corner", and lazing around in the break room watching Spongebob with the kids of some of the people here.
Seriously though, I still wonder why these guys are even allowed to let kids into a place where something regularly goes haywire. At least the break room and kids' room are both located on the far end of the software department. That way, anyone inside is far away from any potential disasters.
Oh yeah, and my secret corner's over there, too. It's not really a corner though. I just crawl under one of the big fluffy sofas there, since noone ever bothers to look under it.
Soon, lunch came around. Though at first it drew quite a few questioning glances, I'm perfectly fine with the notion of eating meat. In fact, just today, I had a nice cheese melt with rosemary-roasted chicken. Yum.
Once again though, after lunch, it got boring again. I sat around randomly in the lab, just kinda... staring at anyone who passed by. I don't really know what else happened after that, 'cause I fell asleep on the armrest of the couch.
Dinner came around, and I woke up to the smell of... hay.
Being a horse, (or at least, I think I'm a horse), I paid little mind on the fact that I was casually munching on hay while everyone else either ate take out, or left. Hay tastes pretty bland, if you ask me. It's kinda like chewing a stick mixed with grass.
A few hours later, once everyone left, I was once again completely alone in the lab. My lab.
I'm the lead scientist. I'm the assistants. I'm the Lab Horse, Gadget.
Just to be clear, even though the computer I cobbled together marks these as "Subject Logs," it's more of a personal diary than anything scientific. And said computer is kept tucked away in a loose air conditioning vent behind the sofa.
As for myself, I was enjoying the fact that without anyone here to tell me what to do, I could do anything I wanted.
I began wandering about sometime around 2:00 AM, when I heard something clattering near the back entrance of the digital technology department's wing. Naturally, I followed the noise.
Oh, and why do I do this? Well... let's just say that aside from ear scritches, a lot of people around here give me bits of candy. Coffee candy.
Now then, back to the noise. So I was sneaking around in the area that I heard the noise, when I noticed a tall man wearing a ski mask unplugging several nodes of our recently-installed cluster computing unit. I watched in curiosity as the man continued unplugging each module in a very calm manner, before pulling them all out of their rack, and stacking them beside him.
It must be pretty cold outside... I thought as I watched, if even the technicians are wearing stuff like that.
I casually strolled back out of the room, which unfortunately, revealed my presence. the technician jumped at the sight of me. I assumed that he wouldn't be surprised, however, since everyone here is used to me. But his surprise became my surprise, which led to me revealing my vocal skills.
"Woah!" I shouted, shaking up the technician even more, "Don't do that. You surprised me." I turned back around and galloped away, afraid of what may come now that someone knows that I can talk. What would they do to me then?
Before I left entirely, however, I remember one thing that the man said before passing out:
"Mutant!"
During the night, I slept balled up in my room, thinking about what could happen to me in the morning. However, to my relief, none of those thoughts came true. As I ate a plain breakfast of cereal, the guys over at the "control center" called over the intercom that police had arrived to arrest a thief who had failed to steal extremely valuable machines.
Huh. And I thought he was a technician. Well, at least I know what to look out for. Anyways, before the police arrived, I helped the scientists tie the thief up with some steel wire. He was already blabbering on about me being able to talk, and luckily, considering the fact that everyone was calling him a lunatic, noone took him seriously. I shudder in anticipation just to think about how big of a laughingstock he'll be in court.
As for me, the scientists figured that I was playing the guard dog, and took out the thief while he wasn't looking. They were close enough, though the bruises that the thief had were from falling on the rack. Not from me tackling him. As a reward for stopping him, I got a free day to do whatever I wanted, and so I did.
It's kinda funny though, 'cause technically, every day for me is a free day. I just occasionally have to help out with something or another. The people here, however, are still treating it like a special day for me.
I continued on to do practically the exact same things that I did yesterday, only for longer. All in all, I do feel pretty proud of myself though. Breaking out of the lab can wait for another day.
Another author's note:
I shudder in anticipation. - My science teacher in eighth grade used to say this whenever someone began talking about what they were gonna do. I finally got to use this myself. In this story.
Okay, let's just say that today was... interesting. For one, apparently Professor Delmar, the guy who runs this place, (not to mention the guy who caught me,) thought that it was a good idea to come to work drunk for no reason. Let's just say that he's kinda... derped right now.
Instead of the usual lights-turning-on that woke me up, I had awoken to the sound of heavy footsteps and the clinking of glass. It seemed like overnight Professor Delmar had returned to the lab for something, but ended up somehow getting drunk instead.
The other guys here say that from the security footage in Delmar's office, it looked like the professor was working on some sort of alternative fuel source derived from ethanol, but somehow managed to end up consuming a diluted mixture of the alcoholic substance. So he's basically drunk beyond recognition right now.
The day, once again, went on as usual, aside from the occasional mumble about Delmar tripping on something. If I remember correctly, just an hour after breakfast a few guys in hazmat suits rushed to the chemistry wing after Delmar tripped on a box of acid.
As for Delmar, he was perfectly fine, landing face-first on the hard tile floor while the box began dissolving itself in sulfuric acid. The funny thing is, the box was in a closet the entire time, before Delmar brought it out thinking that it contained ramen.
But yeah, other than that, today was kind of a "meh" day.
I woke up far later than usual this morning, due to the fact that for some reason, the lights never turned on. Out of curiosity, I stumbled blindly from my room, blinking out the wisps of sleep while I wandered around. No-one was here. Not Delmar, not the janitors, and probably not the would-be thief. I was alone still, and apparently, either everyone suddenly forgot about the existence of the lab, or something happened.
To make it short, something happened. To be exact, apparently after Delmar had the... "incident" last night, the head management thought that it would be best to move all the staff around to different labs. And judging from the letters that arrived in the mail this morning, the lab I live in is scheduled for not only a renovation due to safety concerns, but it's destined to be the future home for biomedical teams, of whom specialized in animal products.
Like as in, those guys that you see bashed on over the internet for their animal testing procedures.
I'm starting to reconsider breaking out of this place if these guys want to... experiment on me. 'Cause honestly, from what I've seen and known about these guys, they're no gonna be very nice to me.
Around noon, a few new people began coming in. I was guessing that it was the people doing renovations, but after they put on labcoats, I'm assuming that the lab swap is gonna happen early. Hopefully these guys'll know what to do with me.
Of course, they're all eyes right now. Since whatever genius who came up with the lab swap didn't know of my existence or whatever, noone bothered to tell me to get my butt out with the rest, so I'm still stuck here. Only this time, everyone's staring at me. And taking pictures.
...and one of them is calling animal patrol asking what they should do with mystical beings.
The good thing about the renovation is that at least they didn't move the big sofa. That would've been baaaad for me. But I'm not gonna ramble on about the renovation. I'm gonna talk about the new guys.
To start, they're a bit... strange. I mean, I get why there's now a whole lab rat breeding room next door to me, but did they really have the thought of dissecting me or something? I know that when Delmar first caught me, he was planning on doing just that in the name of research, but before he announced the plans, he had a change of heart, and kinda just left me around as a pet instead.
But these guys, they're crazy. I mean, when someone says studying, I normally think of reading through piles of books, or even googling something. But to the new peeps here, it pretty much means stick a probe in some orifice, write something down, and repeat. If I didn't know better, I'd have said that they were aliens!
Enough on that, though. The animal control's here again, and judging from their faces, they're just as confused as I am. If it weren't for the fact that these new scientists were... well, scientists, and said animals were lab rats, then they'd all pretty much be in jail for animal abuse. I'm still not entirely sure about what they're gonna do with me though.
As for breakfast, they didn't know what else to feed me besides apples and carrots. They also took away my bed, too. Apparently, whoever it is that's in charge now thought that I had wandered into some guy's room and fell asleep, 'cause they also took away my bag of stuff.
It didn't matter all that much, though. Most of those were just little trinkets I made from old parts that the engineering department threw out. For now, I'm left with a pile of old sheets and some sort of weird block of salt. Oh yeah, and a haystack. A literal haystack. They seem to be treating me like an actual horse. Geez, don't they get the fact that a freakin' unicorn with a human-like intelligence should get more than that?
The answer to that is no. No, they don't. I'm pretty sure that they think I'm just some tiny horse thing that happened to have a horrible deformity on my head, and dyed fur. Idunno. Something. Either way, I'm still being treated like a pet for now, only I just got demoted from lab assistant to barnyard animal.
Lunch came and went. Some grass, another apple. A few mane rustles and petting. And then suddenly...
This guy just kinda barges into the main office, saying "We need to do something with that unicorn."
How do I know? Well, the sofa's still there, and I've got a little something hiding down there to hack into the security systems.
Okay, so there's a chance that they may know about me being able to talk. The footage from the thief event was from an older camera without audio recording... but there's two other cameras in the area that may have picked up my speech, and--
The backup tapes are gone. I can't do anything about the footage. Can't delete it, can't hide it. If someone finds out about what I've been holding back, and I'm not just talking speech, then I'm pretty much screwed.
Like as in, laying on a dissection table screwed. (The thought of that still brings me chills.)
Messing with the mainframe to destroy unwanted information screwed. (Let's just say that they had a few things about my reproductive organs stored on there that I didn't want anyone to know about. Geez, they restrict naked human pics, and they're perfectly fine with naked me pics?)
Driving that golf cart in circles around the engineering department screwed. (Yep, that was fun. Until it crashed.)
And yes, I really have done those things... Not the dissection, but the other two. Usually no-one really checks the backups, since nothing big really ever happens, but if anyone, anyone, decides to randomly check, then it's all over for me.
Talk about cliche. Something bad happens, you hope that it doesn't get worse, and BAM! Right in the face. The past few days have been relatively normal now that things have settled down, since everyone's focused more on whatever it is that they're testing.
And then, some doofus decided that he was bored enough to go on and check through the entire backup of the past three weeks' security footage. Obviously, they found out about it, and sent the video to Delmar, who then forwarded it to the new head of the lab. And said head of the lab is this guy who kinda just lumbers around doing nothing until he finds something interesting to do.
At this current point, trying to squeeze a word from my mouth is the most interesting thing in existence to him. As I type this under the table, I'm trying my best to imitate as many horse noises as possible, without giving him any clue otherwise. He hasn't even given me his name yet, either. In my eyes, he's slowly inching closer and closer to that "stereotypical mad scientist" sort of guy, with the endless questions, that maniacal smile... and those hands, I haven't seen anything grimier in my life... Does he even wash his hands? I mean--
"Do you see my hands, horse?"
Well then. Mind reading much? I pretended not to know what he said, and glanced at his face for several seconds before zoning out again. Finally, after a few moments of mindless staring, he continued speaking.
"These are stains from my endless toil. Medicines, mostly. While lab rats are sufficient for most things, it's pretty hard to know what they're thinking. How they feel. You can't just walk up and ask, 'Oh, hey, Ratto, how ya doing?' to a rat, now can you?"
I watched as the man paused for a moment. He was either taking a breath from rambling, or he was seriously thinking that a dramatic pause was needed to interrogate a freakin' horse.
"What I need is something I can test on, and get immediate reactions from. I've already tried human testing before, but it's always shot down in one way or another. What I want to test isn't painful in any way. In fact, it's very much the complete opposite. Our team's been working on a non-addictive pain relief medication for the past couple o' years, and it's pretty hard to tell what the rats think."
Oh boy. I know where this is going. He's gonna go full-on inspirational and say that "We need you, because you can make a diffe--"
"We need you, because you can make a difference. You can tell us how it affects you, and at the same time still allow us to avoid human testing. Please, just say something."
Huh, sounds sane enough. I'd might as well see for myself before I push it away.
"Something" I murmured with a grin. I'd might as well mess with this guy as long as I can.
The man (I still don't know his name...) nodded, and left the room.
I've been watching what's going on for the past few hours now. Everyone's scurrying around with various papers and things like that, and noone's even asked me about helping.
I tried lightening up the mood a little by doing something cute like I did when I was little, but that didn't work at all. Noone here seems to have any sense of humor but me. They're all so... stern about everything.
It's almost scary, in fact.
Today's the day that I'm supposed to start my work as a "test subject". Hopefully, it won't be painful in any way. I hope.
"So, I need you to sit still while I get the machinery ready for your readings. You got it?"
I nodded, hopping onto the medical stool in the room. I winced for a moment as the stool's wheels shrieked at the sudden impact, but I was fine.
As the man began measuring out the correct dosage, I finally caught a glimpse of his name plate; Dr. Hagen. I guess that's good now that I know his name, since I don't have to repeat myself so much with "That guy" or "The man".
Dr. Hagen continued futzing around with the measuring when I suddenly blurted out, "Why would testing the medicine on me work, anyways?"
Hagen turned to face, me, stunned for a short moment before he answered.
"Because you can talk? I mean, sure, rats are fine specimens in their own ways, but short of human testing, we can never really tell how they feel."
"Yeah," I replied, "but how do you know that the drug works the same way in my body, compared to rats and humans?"
"What?" Hagen replied. I clearly caught him off guard with that question.
"Are you sure that the drug works the same way in my body as the rats and other people?"
Dr. Hagen paused for a moment. Once again, I must've struck something that he missed. If things like this keep happening, I'm pretty sure that I'll enjoy the new crew just as much as the old guys.
"Uh... we're not entirely sure if it'll work properly, but I'm pretty sure that it will. Your genetic makeup has quite a few similarities with humans, in fact."
Oh, yeah. Sure, sure, just toss in the typical "You act human, so we must be related," gag. Amateurs.
My biggest question is though, how am I supposed to test the effects of the pain medication if I feel no pain?
I continued pondering this question as Dr. Hagen nodded in my peripheral vision to some assistant creeping up behind me.
The last thing I remember is the loud thump of a bat to my head. If it weren't for my strange biology allowing my body to be much more resistant to force, then I'd probably be in a coma right now. Or dead.
Okay, geez. OW. Who was the doofus with the great idea to slug my with a bat? That Hagen guy? The lab assistant wielding said bat? 'Cause that hurt.
"Hey, you alright girl?"
Well, at least it seems like an accident. I've still got that terrible headache now though, and probably some sort of massive bruise on my noggin. Just for kicks, I continued laying limp.
"Wakey wakeyyyyy" the voice called again. This time I was sure of who it belonged to: Dr Hagen. Even though I knew I was safe for sure, I continued my faking.
"Alright then, I guess that I'll have to use the Insanely Long Needle™ to inject this pain medication into your bloodstream..."
Okay, you're crossing a line there, doctor. Don't you use that children's threat on me. Just to be sure that he was fibbing though, I cracked my eyes open, and caught a glimpse of the infamous Insanely Long Needle™ attached to a syringe in Hagen's hands.
"Welp. I'm awake!" I hollered, immediately bolting upright. Though, now that I think about it, I kinda regret doing that due to the sudden spike of pain in my head.
Hagen, on the other hand, smiled kindly. He put down the syringe and the two foot long needle, and handed me a couple of pills.
"Here's your dose." He said sternly, which didn't fit at all with the current mood that was screaming off of his face. It's like a mime trying to play the part of a stand-up comedian, complete with the corny jokes. In fact, the only thing more out of place than Hagen's voice and face pairing at this moment would probably be that one time I saw that weird folder labeled "Favorite cat pictures" on Delmar's desk a few years back.
"Are you going to continue your staring, or are you going to take your headache away?"
Oh yeah. The pills. I lit my horn and grabbed the pills, popping them into my mouth before taking a swig from a cup that the lab assistant had brought.
Wait for it...
Wait for it...
...
Okay, nevermind, I forgot that pills take a little while before they work. Darnit.
One short nap later, and my headache's gone! Hopefully, for Dr. Hagen's sake, it's because of the pill, and not my nap. Though, my main point is that it doesn't hurt to shake my head anymore.
"Horse?"
Okay then. So apparently I forgot to even let them know my name. I perked up, and directed my gaze towards Dr. Hagen.
"Hey," I deadpanned, "the name's Gadget, m'kay?"
Dr. Hagen rolled his eyes in amusement at my act, and ruffled my mane.
"So, um... Gadget?" He began, "I've been talking with some upper management for a few hours now."
Oh, crap. Do they know?
"You're gonna be removed from the lab, Gadget. I told them about your human-level intelligence, and they told me to immediately stop any tests on you, both current and future. Instead, they want you to be donated to a small hospital on the edge of town to keep people company."
Well, that's one secret out the window. I wonder if he's told them about my ta--
They also want you in that hospital because that way, you'd be able to freely talk without alarming a mass amount of people.
Well, that's a bit better than I expected. I should probably stop overthinking things like this...
A good eight or so hours has already passed with me riding a bus to whatever hospital it was that I'm destined to live at. Honestly, if I knew that it would be this remote, then I would've told them to just get a freakin' plane ticket or something. They said the edge of town, not the middle of nowhere.
The bus was a personal one as well. Even though I knew that others knew about my secret now, I wasn't ready to just blurt out my existence for all to hear, y'know? It's just... weird. Dr. Hagen personally drove the bus as well, so we talked about my life and his the entire way through.
"Whatcha doing there, Gadget?" Hagen suddenly asked from the front. I had gotten carried away with writing and didn't notice him looking at me through the mirror.
Since my biggest secret's out, I didn't really think that it would be very big of a deal to let the rest loose too. I held up the tablet that I write these logs in, waving it in the air. "Just typing!" I responded, before setting it back down.
It's kinda funny, 'cause since I've got these handy telekinetic abilities, I can literally type as I waved the tablet in the air. Hagen, like Delmar before him, had quickly gotten used to watching me work my "magic", so he never questioned it.
"What are you typing?"
I turned back to gaze at the doctor through the mirror, raising my brow at the question.
"Well?" he continued, returning the look for a quick second before focusing back on the road.
I sighed. He was getting a bit nosey into what I do. But I'd might as well, right? I mean, he doesn't seem like a bad guy.
"It's basically a diary. A long time ago they were actual logbook entries that the researchers at the lab wrote while they watched me go about my life, but eventually once they had enough information they pretty much handed me the entire database on this tablet. It's got enough memory to last a pretty long time, too, with a spacey 512-gig ssd in it."
Hagen nodded while I read back over what I wrote. I'm not really the type who likes to put actual numbers into my writing unless it's something that requires them, but I don't want to write 512 out in words. It just gets annoying. Same thing goes for ssd. I could've said the full 'Solid-State-Drive', as well as typing it, but once again, it gets annoying when you know that it can be shortened. But enough with that short rant about not liking the ability to shorten words but doing it anyways.
"You seem a bit mad there, Gadget. Is something bugging you?"
I shook my head. That was when I realized that somehow I had completely ignored the fact that I was sputtering random insults at my tablet under my breath.
But yeah, hopefully that doesn't become a habit. Either that or I've always done this but never realized.
Eventually, after several additional hours on top of the eight that had already passed, I got bored of typing down our conversations. Instead, I took a nap.
Honestly, I'm not sure what I should say about this. We apparently drove through the night as well, 'cause it's morning now. And even though Hagen mentioned that the hospital was "Out of town", it's definitely in a town. Well, more like a full-on city, actually. I can tell that we're not too far off from it, considering as how my vision is currently filled with distant skyscrapers and bridges.
Wait a second... where's the mountains? I mean, sure, we've probably driven far enough that the ones I'm used to seeing outside the observation windows of the lab are gone, but I'm just not used to seeing flatness all around. Instead, the tallest objects are the skyscrapers and the bridges. And speaking of bridges, they're pretty big, too. Mm... is that a breeze I feel?
I rolled the windows down further, letting my mane blow with the cool wind. There's also this distinctly salty taste to it. I've never been able to taste wind like this before.
I let my mind relax for a moment as I took in the view, before realizing: We're nearing the beach! And judging from the length of the car trip, as well as the fact that we took a westbound interstate, we're somewhere in California!
Considering the two-state jump, I'd have to say that this is a pretty big shift from the dryness of the midwest. I mean, the mountain view was nice and all, but I've never been able to experience anything like this before... it's pretty relaxing to take in the scenery.
I'm no longer locked into the lab that I've known for all these years. I'm not a lab horse anymore. I'm just me, Gadget. And honestly, this is probably a definitive turning point in my life.
We've just arrived at the hospital, and while the doctor finds a place to park, I'm gonna be packing my stuff back up. It's kinda just a big mess back here now that I've been spending a full day or so messing around.
Yup. definitely not the little backwater shack that I had imagined. This place is clean, shiny, and crazy busy. I'm guessing that I'll have quite a good time here.
Hopefully.
...
I just realized, I was to be put in a hospital so less people would know of me, not more. What's up with that?
Oh. Now I understand why this place would keep me away from others.
It's not just any random hospital like I thought it'd be. Instead, it's a mental hospital. I can't say whether or not it would truly count as a hospital, considering the complete lack of surgical equipment in each room. Instead, it's just a small collection of various mood-altering drugs, some comfy seats, a bed, and the occasional person randomly blabbing off.
So... yeah. Hospital? More like crazy house of weirdos if you ask me. (Though if anyone is reading this over my shoulder, *ahem* Hagen, then please note that I don't mean any offense to anybody.)
The room that I got is pretty nice by what I'm used to. It's spacey, has it's own bathroom, and plenty of storage space for my various trinkets and stuff like that. It's also near the main office as well, so if I ever need anything I can just trot down the hall and ask.
And aside from the occasional kid opening my door on accident, it's completely cut off from the rest of the building. I'm pretty sure that this used to be a part of the main office itself or something, considering as how there's still a faint outline of a walled-up door.
For now, I'll just have to make-do with the constant noise of kids running around though. 'Cause y'know, it's a child mental clinic and all. But besides the constant noise, it's a comfy place all around.
Hopefully, it won't get too long to get used to. I'm already liking this place.
Wait a sec. Someone's coming. I've gotta hide my tablet now.
I already knew that his place was pretty much built just for mentally deranged kids, but I never expected that there would be ones who were utterly addicted to anything cute.
Like as in, to the point of which they permanently latch onto said "cute" thing and need to be pried off using a crowbar. And apparently, I'm one of those "cute" things. Why? Because apparently, even though I haven't taken a bath or shower or anything in a few days, my greasy mane is still, to them, the fluffiest thing in existence.
So yeah, there's that. And the fact that I've somehow managed to type this from the other side of my room since all the kids here would swarm to my tablet if they saw it. And probably also counting how I'm currently a walking ball of children.
Anyways, I'd better stop now before someone notices the floating tablet behind the closet door.
And I thought this was a hospital. Turns out it's leaning a bit closer to the insane asylum sort of facility. I'm only here to help comfort children, not to become a living snowball of them. I hope they arrive with the crowbar soon. It's really tiring to walk around with three times your own weight clinging to your back.
Okay, good. The crowbar-man's here. Obviously, these are human children that he's working with, so the crowbar's more along the line of 'fluffy foam poking stick'. It still apparently does the job well though, with the kids immediately jumping off from the tickling effect of the fake fur on the stick.
Okay, so typing behind the closet door wasn't a good idea. I'm now typing this from under my bed, since it's low enough that even the kids here wouldn't be able to crawl under there.
The bad news is, apparently they think I'm some sort of smurf-horse. Maybe it's my fur color? I've been hearing that my white lab-vest makes me look kinda like Smurfette, so... yeah... and on top of that I've been also called a "Big Blue Cat".
So I guess I'm now the CatSmurfetteHorseThing? I honestly don't know. Hopefully though nothing too crazy or bad will happen anytime soon. Like I said before, I've been enjoying every part of this except for the crazy children.
It's kinda crazy just to think about what these kids go through every day though. A lot of them were brought in from foster care and orphanages, so in a way, they kinda need me to be around. There's not really much here aside from teddy bears and stuff like that to help them, and just to see me walking down the hall gets them all riled up. It's exhausting, but sweet in a grabby, clingy sort of way.
Are you secretly a smurf horse?
... Um, how'd you get to my tablet? And no. I was just... ugh.
I like computers.
What?
Especially this flying tablet. It's cool!
Can you please put down the tablet? It belongs to me, and I don't want anything to happen to it.
Aww. Please?
No. How did you even get in to my tablet anyways? There's no way you could physically get to it.
Oh, that's just me remoting into it from my laptop.
Why are you here, kid? You seem sane enough that you could go live a normal life. And judging from the fact that you literally just remotely bypassed all of my tablet's security features, I'm pretty sure that you belong in some sort of technical college, not just this facility.
And also, how do you know that I'm using my tablet under my bed?
I also have a view through the integrated camera. I can tell that it's about an inch off the floor.
Please, just get off my tablet.
No.
Why are you here?
I'm too smart for my own good. Like, I often go into a vegetative state in which my entire body is paralyzed. During that time all I can do is think, so naturally I've gotten quite smart over the years.
Oh. Sorry for asking.
No probs. I'll leave you alone now.
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Aaaaand some kid apparently managed to drag theoihoIH:obh98 08y3 hoiqho 3o0y8 108yoihcbsOIUHnGUOG
Okay then. I guess I'll just get the rest of this in later. For now I'm just writing on paper. But geez, between whoever it was who got into my tablet and the kid that keeps mashing the screen every chance they get, I'm not sure how I'll be able to keep my own privacy. Geez.
Oh yeah, and just a few minutes ago some more kids came by and complimented me on my supposed "smurfiness".
Yup. I'm gonna dye my hair later.
Log 4033: PFSHDOR (Or, Pink Fluffy Smurf-Horse Dancing on Rainbows)
So, after constant abuse of my new nickname "Smurf Horse", by the children here, I finally decided to dye my hair. The color I had decided on was a brownish-red hue, and at the least it would get rid of that horrible nickname.
Too bad that hair dye for humans doesn't work the same way on me. The pink mane tells it all. On top of that, when I finally got my own name lapel to pin to my vest, I realized that, being issued by people who wanted only the best for the children, decided to write my name on the lapel as "PFSH", or "Pink fluffy smurf-horse".
I really wish that I could just buck them in the face. Or maybe roundhouse kick them. I heard that this Chuck Norris guy does that to a lot of people. Same goes for Bruce Lee.
But yeah, I'm now supposedly "Miss PFSH". Why can't they get it right just once? I mean, it wouldn't take that long for the kids here to memorize a name! In fact, wouldn't the nickname be harder for them to recognise due to it's length?!
By logic, yes. It would indeed be far more difficult to memorize a string of words than a single one.
You again! You're smart, right? Do you think you could get into the hospital's database and change my name back?
Um... don't you have the ability to do that? I've read through your previous logs in my spare time, and you seem to be a smart cookie.
But I'm not a cookie, and those were just coincidences!
Yeah... about that mainframe that you deleted images on.
Well, okay. BUT THAT WAS ONE TIME.
Yes, but wouldn't you still be in possession of the skills required to do it again?
Huh. Good point.
Judging by the lack of gibberish I take that you've hidden this tablet of yours in yet another location?
Yup.
Talk later?
Sure.
Geez, I seem to be getting pretty good at typing these from far away. Just a couple of days ago I had to be in the same room, standing right next to the hiding place. But now, I can continue typing from the other side of the hall! (Though to be clear, the specific hall I'm talking about has only two rooms in it, and both are bathrooms. Don't ask.)
Now, as for the resident hospital mainframe. Granted that I'm officially a staff member, I have full access to the system with read-write permissions. So I already know that this'll be far easier than guessing passwords every night for a month. The only problem is that I only have write access to patient files, while everything on the topic of staff members including myself were limited to read-only.
So it's essentially a matter of figuring my way around the encryption.
Though I still have the very annoying problem of being called "Pink Fluffy Smurf-Horse".
And also, obviously I'm writing this from my memory of today, since I couldn't possibly use the tablet as I snooped. That, and the fact that if I did bring it with me earlier, it'd be covered in paint.
'Cause apparently, some more of those upper management doofuses decided that it was a nice day to paint some of the hallways.
I'll just say that along with my current nickname I now also have "Dancing on Rainbows" tacked onto the end by the kids I meet.
So according to them, I'm the PFSHDOR.
Great. Just great. I'm already hooves-deep in trying to get rid of the "PFSH" part.
And my hair smells like strawberries again. Can't I at least have access to something I can mess with? I mean, yeah, it's a hospital and all, but there's got to be some sort of break room or lounge or something. Or do hospitals not work like that? I don't know.
Hey, I'm back. What's up?
Not much. Why'd you leave earlier?
My right hand froze up and my left hand attacked my face.
Geez. Sorry for asking. Isn't this a mental hospital though?
Well, technically yes, but they also treat patients with motor control problems like me.
I thought that you said you go into a vegetative state.
Oh, I do. But that's relatively rare. My biggest problem is that sometimes my body acts without any sort of instruction from my brain.
That doesn't sound fun. What's the treatment?
There's not really any single way to treat it, so I just live it out. I've gotten used to it anyways. I'll chat tomorrow.
Well then. So the closest thing that I have to a diary is also some kid's chatroom. Great.
Log 4034: I don't actually know what to name this because all I really did today was get lost in the hallway after eating lunch...
No, really. I'm just glad that that kid is practically my GPS for the hospital's halls.
Hey.
Hey, wazzup?
Not much, though I see that you've found a way for us to continue chatting without junking up your logs.
Yeah.
Y'know, I'm able to walk and stuff today, so maybe we should meet?
I don't see why not.
Well, I guess with our two minds put together, we could be the Dynamic Duo of... Something.
Currently, since I've been practicing, I'm now able to float the tablet through the air vents in the ceiling and still type as I walk, so I know that my skills are getting waaaay sharper.
I continued through the stretch of hallways, ignoring the fact that I was still "Smurf-Horse" to most of the others here. My stomach grumbled as I trotted, making me take a quick detour down to the so-called "restaurant" within the facility. The bad thing about it is that the food tastes even worse than cafeteria food. It's practically just nutritious mush. No flavor, no anything.
Enough with that though. I quickly grabbed an apple, and continued on my way to whoever it was that's been sending messages to me daily. A few heads turned at my new brightly-colored neon pink hair, but other than the fact that it just makes me even more noticeable, I didn't really care.
Judging by your current location according to the security cameras, you should arrive at my room at the next corner.
Oh. So apparently this kid also sees what I'm doing... We'd make a great team!
Apparently, due to the fact that I had been running around the halls for the entire day, combined with the fact that I had only eaten an apple yesterday, I had collapsed from exhaustion before I was able to reach the room I was looking for. Once again, I'm currently writing this on paper since my tablet is currently unavailable. Specifically, I've got a spiral notebook with me now that I use as an alternative when my tablet's gone. I know where it is though. It's still up in the air vents near rooms 1750 and 1752.
I also know that I probably won't be able to go retrieve it for today, since I'm still kinda stuck in a hospital bed with an IV. I should really pay attention to when I'm feeling tired.
Oh, and I also happened to make a small voice recorder I can hide in my mane. It's not really all that complicated, considering as how I built it from some old sing-along toys I found in the recycle bins. But hey, it's still recycling if you scrap three toys for parts, right?
"Hello?"
"Hey, doc. Do you think I can go now?"
The nurse raised a brow. At the same time, a rapid knocking came upon the door.
"Not quite yet, Gadget. There's someone who'd like to meet you."
"The kid with muscle control issues?"
"Yes, he's the one. Come in, Ranell!"
A short pre-teen entered the room on crutches, his smile beaming brightly. For someone who was currently half paralysed, he was in a pretty good mood.
"Hey," he began, "you're Gadget, right?"
I nodded, looking up from the notebook. Dropping the pen, I waved back at him. Well, I didn't necessarily drop the pen, just shift from holding it in my mouth to levitating it to continue writing. It takes some practice, but it makes multitasking pretty easy.
And then the awkward silence rolled in.
"Um... so what do you want to talk about?" I asked, lifting myself from the bed. The only response I received in return was a shrug.
"I don't really know..." Ranell finally replied, watching me as I continued struggling under the heavy blankets. "What do you like the most? I've read through your logs, and I can tell you like technology."
I nodded. An upbeat "Yeah!" escaped my lips, and along with me springing from my bed at the mention of technology, I also faceplanted on the floor.
Ouch.
Okay, so I've got my tablet back. That "ouch" at the end of that last part was from my reaction to myself falling off the bed in the security camera's video feed.
"Cool, so are you using a similar technique to the one I used to view through your webcam?"
"Maybe." I responded through the video chat. After I had fallen off the bed Ranell was escorted out of the room in case if anything else might happen. 'Cause y'know, there was heavy machinery that I could've knocked over.
"So you're using that security vulnerability that people found that allows you to root the device over-the-air?"
I shook my head, frowning.
"No, that's only an issue in linux-based devices. The security cameras use an in-house designed firmware."
The image of Ranell showed that he was deep in thought. Though he was now out of his crutches again, it didn't mean that he spent any less time using his mind.
"But Gadget," he finally responded, "even if it was designed in-house, wouldn't it still be based on an existing architecture? These are medical science people, not computer science. They don't have the resources to develop a whole new operating system and API."
Huh, he has a point.
"But still, I didn't use the backdoor to root the camera's firmware."
"Then what did you use?"
I smirked. "Y'know how not too long ago someone found that bug that allowed anyone to bypass login just by spamming the backspace key?"
Ranell raised a brow.
"Really? That happened?"
I nodded. "I read it in an article. Something about nobody ever bothering to try it during testing mainly because it's such a random bug. It was discovered a couple of years ago. Luckily for me, the firmware in those cameras still has that bug in their bootloader."
The boy chuckled. "That's what they get for not installing those security patches."
"No," I replied, "it's not a bug in Linux. It originated from the Grub 2 bootloader."
Ranell rolled his eyes. "Same difference, right? Usually Linux and Grub are found with each other."
"Yeah, in most cases. Though don't forget, Grub can also boot Windows, remember? It stands for GRand Unified Bootloader."
"So you're saying that you just hooked up to the serial console from whatever control system handles the camera, and pressed backspace?"
...Um. Are those other... ponies? I mean, sure, I can tell that something is happening, and judging from the description of the video, it's a fan animation of some sort of show.
But my biggest concern is the visual similarity between myself and the supposed ponies in the video. Obviously, they're just 3D models, but... I just...
Urgh...
Log terminated.
...Gadget?
Hello?
Helloooo?
...
Remote logging initiated.
Remote V-O initiated.
Log copied.
Warning! Root access requested from an unknown source.
Password accepted.
Internal logging triggered by unusual activity.
P0Ni OS Terminal > notepad.exe
There is no such application.
P0Ni OS Terminal > edit
There is no such application.
P0Ni OS Terminal > vim log_4036
Okay, so it seems like Gadget's carrying her tablet in her saddlebags. I can hear the thumping through the mic.
"HEY! I WANT TO TALK TO HAGEN, DELMAR, ANYONE!"
Aaaand she's mad. I probably shouldn't have shown her that video considering how it's a fan-creation for... yeah... I'll just leave it at that.
"THEY'RE BUSY?! THEN TELL ME WHAT THIS IS!"
Crap. I'm pretty sure that she's about to--
Yup. She's showing them the video. It's a good thing that I'm on the backend of the software under all the fancy GUIs and stuff.
She's probably gonna go on some sort of "Truth Hunt" or something now.
Huh. So on top of realizing that I somehow came from a cartoon, Ranell decides that it would be a perfect time for him to break into my tablet and record me. Great.
So, now that I know that I'm technically not real, I can safely say that I don't exactly care about reality anymore. After all, if I'm from a show, wouldn't that mean that I'm just the physical embodiment of a figment of imagination? That I only exist to follow the script that some voice actor reads aloud? Heck, this even explains me as a whole! It's impossible for any sort of equine to have naturally blue hair, and to have such a high level of intelligence...
I mean, I personally don't have much care about the supposed "real-world" anymore, considering as how there's an equally likely chance for it to also be nothing but a simulated imagination, or whatever. All I really care about is meeting these other "ponies" from the show I probably came from. Maybe even meet my parents!
There's still a major problem though. All my life, I've been surrounded by people, technology. From the bits of the show that I've seen, I can easily tell that the world that my kind lives in is sort of a backwater country with limited technology, quite possibly due to their "magical" abilities. I know, I know. As a scientific persona, I'd have to dismiss this "magic" crap as garbage, but once again, I can relate directly to the experience.
Levitation? Check. Teleportation? Yeah, I guess, but I haven't had any reason to teleport for a while now, and I've mostly forgotten how to do it.
According to the show, there seems to be three primary types of ponies under the species name "Equus Sapiens" that I'll give them for now. Those three types are the unicorns, such as myself, pegasi, which have ridiculously small wings for their body size, and "normal" ponies, which lack wings and horns.
There's also a fourth type as well, which has both wings and a horn. From the show, I heard mention of them being called "alicorns", so I guess that'll do.
Geez, I just realized that I went from suffering a crazy-meta identity crisis to analysing a kids' show and organizing the populace into groups based on physical traits.
Yeah, I've seen other kids here do something similar. One second, they're all wacko-crazy, and the next, they're chill as ever.
Can you please not but into my logs for now?
Hey, maybe if you separate the log and the chat apps instead of just using the log as a text editor for both, then you wouldn't have to be interrupted.
Hmmf. Fine.
Why are you replying directly in the log instead of in chat, anyways?
Because I'm lazy, and I'm tired from thinking about this.
Okay, so the freakout I had yesterday made the people running this place think that I should probably be returned to Hagen or something. They think that I'm going crazy from not seeing my "old owner" anywhere, so they pretty much strapped me into a horse trailer and hauled me back to the lab. As of right now, we're about two hours into the drive, and it's waaay less comfortable in this thing than sitting normally on a comfy seat. On top of that, all I was given for food this morning was oats and hay, and no matter how many times I pleaded for at least scrambled eggs, they refused every freakin' time. That's the problem with these guys, they treat me like a person, but at the same time, they don't understand that I practically am a person, just in my tiny unicorn body.
Unlike the horses they were probably thinking of when they gave me food, I'm an omnivore. "Your digestive system is built specifically to handle tough fibers" my butt.
So you're not at the hospital anymore?
Oh hey, Ranell. Yeah, I left this morning while everyone else was sleeping so that no-one would cling on to me when I leave.
Smart decision. There's a buncha crying toddlers in the next room over to me asking where the "Smurf Horse" is.
Heh, they'll find a plushie or something to replace me.
The kids?
No, the staff. They've got an entire room filled with all sorts of toys and plushies. I saw it while I was looking for your room.
Oh yeah. That room. I remember this one time when I lost control of my muscles while I was looking through the toys when I was younger. I freaked 'cause I wasn't able to move, and there were plushies falling all over me when I tipped over. It took them half an hour to figure out what happened and dig me out.
That sounds both hilarious and traumatizing at the same time.
Trust me, it was.
I think I'm gonna take a nap now to avoid getting nauseous from this crappy trailer.
Ugh...
Where am I?
Oh yeah, the Lab. Or at least, the delivery bay at the Lab... I should probably memorize the name of this place at some point though. Calling it "The Lab" is getting boring.
"Hey, wake up, pony! We're here!" Shouted a gruff voice. The trailer's doors opened, hitting me in full with a blindingly bright ray of sunlight.
I eyed the familiar off-white buildings that I called home.
Okay, lemme just leave this thing on auto for the time being. I don't feel like typing today.
Auto-Logging: Enabled
Migrating current log to A/V log...
Initializing neural link...
Wait... NEURAL LINK??? Why didn't you tell me that you were able to LINK YOUR MIND TO YOUR TABLET?!
Oh, that? I came up with it not too long ago. I've been learning quite a few new abilities based off of what I've seen from the show I supposedly came from. Win some, lose some, right?
I... guess so. But how does it work?
I'm honestly not sure, but I do know that it kinda feels like letting down a mental wall, followed by this tingling buzzing sensation.
Lemme guess, "magic"?
Pretty much. I don't have any explanation for how I can mentally link with my tablet from fifty feet away either.
Ready.
And how are you reading my tablet's internal logs, anyways? And why are they showing up on the normal logs?
I kinda messed with your tablet after your freakout. Sorry.
It's fine, at least I know what's going on now.
Actually, if I remember correctly, it was a function that was accidentally enabled when that kid was mashing the tablet.
Yeah, those logs started showing up around the time when that happened.
I continued conversing with Ranell for a good ten or so minutes as I unpacked my stuff and moved back in. Apparently, Hagen had never come around to clean up my old room yet in the time I was gone, so everything was still just as it was.
"Gadget?" I heard the professor call from another room while I moved some boxes, "Delmar sent you a message, could you pull it up on your tablet and read it?"
New message from: Professor D.
Well, it would've been nice if that came up before Hagen told me.
Retrieving message...
Dang. This is getting annoying already. Especially since it's happening in my head.
Message received. Opening message.
Gadget, I was informed just a couple of hours ago that you have finally discovered your origins. That being said, I must say, it certainly took you quite some time. When I first found you wandering the street, (not in a dirty blanket on a field, as the others say), I immediately recognized the telltale physical makeup of a character from an old show I knew of from many years ago. At the time, it had garnered a massive following, and even to my own surprise in my days as a student in university, many such fans were not only children and preteens, but fully-fledged adults.
In other words, I already knew who you were from the start. The "show universe" that you have wished to return to for the past couple of days has grown old. I'm not even sure if it is capable of existing anymore without new episodes being released. After all, it was quite a long time ago when it had ended.
I have my doubts on your capability to return, but I still wish you luck in your findings. If I could be of any assistance, just tell me.
-Prof. Delmar
Oh.
Wait... HE KNEW?! WHAT?!
Log automatically terminated. Reason: user has dropped neural connection with the device.
Well then. If I ever am able to communicate neuralpathically with an electronic device, remind me to not freak out. Okay, Gadget?
"Okay, so here's what I know," I began, tossing a paper onto the table. Hagen was sitting across from me, and Ranell was currently on video-chat with me.
"Last night, after realizing my origin, I've decided to try and go back."
Hagen raised an eyebrow. Ranell simply sat quietly, staring back through the illuminated screen.
"What do you think?" I asked, pushing the paper closer. It was a diagram I had crudely sketched of different ways that I could possibly break into my home universe.
Ranell cleared his throat as he read through the paper. "Y'know, Gadget," he finally said, "I don't think that strapping you into the Large Hadron Collider would do any good other than obliterating your atoms."
Hagen nodded, and returned his gaze to me from the paper. "And neither would 'punching a hole in space'."
I frowned. "Don't blame the eleven year old for her childish plans, geez." I replied.
The doctor sighed, rubbing the bridge of his nose with his fingers.
"Gadget, I may not know as much as Delmar in terms of universal physics, but..."
"But what?" I snapped.
"...but these ideas here all lead to either certain death, or cataclysmic explosions. Either way, they'd result in death to all parties involved."
Yeah, I guess he's right. Accelerating me past the speed of light would probably kill me.
"What about that Delmar guy?" Ranell suddenly asked, breaking through my train of thought.
I shrugged. I guess he'd be able to help.
Okay, so Delmar sent me another message. He's arriving sometime tomorrow, so for now I'm just gonna sit here, eat some pizza, and think.
The show that I supposedly came from ended almost half a century ago, based on what Delmar said about his college studies and his current age.
My body structure, intelligence, and the so-called "magic" skills that I have all point to the conclusion of my origins in that show.
...And if I'm here, and the show ended back then, that means... it still exists.
Welp. I'm back in Hagen's bus again, and this time I'm heading to Delmar's new lab! Dr. Hagen told me that he wouldn't be able to help all too much with me going back to this "Equestria" place, but I'm sure that Delmar would be able to. After all, he is the kind of guy who's pretty much a master at everything.
Not to mention the fact that he was the first one to get to know me. (Though I do remember being tazed. Definitely not a good feeling.)
But yeah, after I was taken into the lab, Delmar realized that I had a human-level intelligence, and by moral standards, it'd be horrific to use me as a test subject of any sort. So instead, I became the primary lab assistant/helper/pony who's acting adorable in the lab.
Eventually, he also got tired of making daily logs for me, so he just handed the entire log database to me on a tablet. My tablet.
So... yeah, pretty good time in general up until the craziness that occurred.
I just realized that I still don't know when my real birthday is.
I should probably stop rambling now.
Voice logging disabled.
And I should probably also figure out how to disable the event notifications that are filling up my logs.
Now then. I'm gonna stop spilling the bowels of my mind onto this thing and just enjoy the view. I know that it's gonna be another long ride.
Trees. Trees. Desert. Mountains. Lake. More desert. Small farming towns. Geez, it's taking a freakin' long time to get to wherever Delmar works now.
Though, it kinda makes sense that it's taking this long, considering how we're traveling across the country. Based on what I'm seeing, we're passing through the midwest right now, in the eastbound direction.
I'm starting to wonder if Delmar works at MIT or something based on the time Hagen's been driving. We probably should've taken an airplane, if you ask me.
Oh yeah. Hagen doesn't have any private aircraft.
Huh. I probably should get something to eat now.
"Doctor Hagen?" I called out from behind the seats, "Are there any snacks?"
Hagen shook his head, pointing at a road sign ahead of us. "You ate the last pile of granola bars and crackers an hour ago. We'll stop for some food at the next exit."
Next exit. Public place. Huh.
"Should I try out my illusions?"
Surprised at what I just said, Hagen quickly replied, "Illusions? Like as in, make something look like something else kind of illusions?"
I nodded, making sure Hagen could see from the dash mirror.
And yes, I've actually been picking up new abilities based on what I see in both the show and fan-works. (I'm staying faaaar away from those "mature spells" category.)
"Sure, why not?" the doctor answered.
Yup. Lemme just switch to my thought-control.
Neuropathic link established.
Okay, so I gotta concentrate. Balance on two legs, got it. Cast spell, check.
I felt a brief chill run over me as my own eyes adjusted to the sudden flash of light wash past. In place of the teal fur and springy pinkish-blonde hair was a light tan skin, covered by a green-blue blouse.
As long as I don't trip too much, I'll look like Hagen's daughter. Heh.
Hagen stopped the bus, and turned to face me.
"Woah!" He joked, "Did I pick up a hitchhiker back there or something?!"
I smiled, and stumbled through the rows of seats.
Wait a sec, just realized that I could probably add a bit of maneuverability to my upright legs with a bit of levitation.
There. Now I can walk "normally".
Aaaand I just realized that I'm probably trashing up the log with these short bursts of thought.
So there. Don't mind me, the totally actually a human girl walking out of the bus behind her supposed father, on her way to grab a hot dog or something because she's hungry. And quite possibly use the restroom as well.
As I followed Dr. Hagen into the rest stop, I immediately saw the line of sandwiches lining the open fridge lining the wall. I instinctively ran straight towards the food, and lit my supposedly nonexistant horn. And then I realized that I'd have to make it look like I was picking it up with my "hand".
As long as I hold the food in the perfect position, it'll also look like I'm just holding it with my "hands", too. It's all a matter of precision levitation.
Okay, so this feels really weird. I can physically feel the sandwich on my hoof, but at the same time I'm holding an illusion "spell" and levitating said sandwich at the same time. I'm just gonna be calm and hope that I don't drop the sandwich or either of the spells.
...
...
Aaaand I can feel the levitation failing. Either I pull more energy from the illusion, or I take away my balance from my legs. I don't wanna drop the sandwich either, so... uh...
Whoop. The levitation apparently dropped while I was thinking. But somehow, the sandwich is still in the same position. Wat.
Like, I can feel it there, as if I had fingers gripping it or something. I don't have hands, but it still feels like I'm holding the sandwich with them.
MY MIND IS FREAKING OUT OVER THIS. WHAT THE HECK'S GOING ON WITH MY NONEXISTING HANDS?!
Okay, okay, calm down. Just ignore the fact that I'm using nonexistant hands as real hands, and continue casually waiting for Hagen to finish paying.
My eyes wandered over to the restrooms, reminding me that I drank two bottles of water earlier when we were passing through the desert area.
"Um... dad?" I asked in a definitely-not-awkward way, "I need to go to the bathroom..."
Hagen sarcastically rolled his eyes, playing the part of annoyed parent quite well.
"Hurry up then. We've still got two hours!"
I dropped the sandwich on the counter, and rushed to the restrooms.
Now that I think about it, how was I able to drop the sandwich just like that? It was firmly stuck in my hooves, and no amount of shaking could release it as long as I wanted to continue holding it. And the moment I wanted to let go of it, it just... drops.
Once again, what.
It feels so weird to use the toilet in this illusion. It mimics the tangible feeling of what it's pretending to be, so it feels like I'm actually washing my hands after using the toilet, when I'm pretty much trying to start a fire with my wet hooves.
I should probably stop thinking about everything I'm doing in the bathroom.
And so, I finished washing my "hands" without another thought, and strolled back out. Hagen had already finished paying, and was back in the bus.
I stepped into the bus, and immediately dropped every spell as I collapsed in a heap.
"Tired?" The doctor asked from the front as he started the engine.
I nodded, taking a bite from the sandwich. Of course it's egg-salad.
I don't remember ever falling asleep, but when I woke up, the sun was already set, and we were in another city.
Well then. That city was apparently just another rest stop. Again. We continued driving after stopping for gas and breakfast, along the way joking that it was the breakfast that gave us gas.
And so, we continued driving.
I'm pretty sure now that Delmar works at MIT or something now, based on the drive length. It's been nearly two days now, and we're still driving.
I'm also pretty sure that he's taking the scenic route just because that means that he gets a longer break from work.
Meh.
I'm also getting pretty used to my "human form" as a preteen girl. I can now walk comfortably, not to mention the fact that I've just decided to stop questioning my own abilities.
Great. Another rest stop. Time to "morph" again.
I don't really like the sound of how I said that. Both reading and saying it aloud. It just sounds weird. I know that I'm not physically changing to a human form, but "morph" isn't really a term that I like all that much.
Hey Gadget. Haven't talked for a few days, and you've been offline for a while, too. What gives?
Hi Ranell. I've been traveling with Hagen again, so the network's been unavailable a lot of times.
That explains a bit. I was reading some of your logs again as well when you came back online at the last stop.
Find anything that interested you?
Yes. Specifically, your human "illusion" self that you used to fake out the public into thinking you were Hagen's daughter.
Yeah... it took a bit of practice, and after a few surprises I've actually become comfortable with holding the form for multiple hours.
Alright. Just don't hurt yourself.
Yup.
After talking some more, I entirely forgot about the fact that I was currently halfway through a Subway sandwich while Hagen was getting something at Walmart. What made the situation even more awkward was the fact that people could see my tablet casually floating above the table typing on itself while I chewed.
And I know for a fact that there's gonna be a youtube video or two popping up soon about the "Magical Subway Girl".
We're back on the road again. The rest of the day was meh.
I felt the sun's rays warming my body as yet another day began. For a moment, I nearly forgot the fact that I had slept in a bus for the past few days, until I remembered that the reason why was because we were parked at one of those rest stops that allowed you to sleep in their parking lot.
I stretched my legs, wincing at the invisible pins jabbing all over them.
Why am I narrating like this?
One big breakfast of greasy McDonald's food later, and I'm thinking normally again. Though, I'm guessing that along with "Magical Subway Girl", there's gonna be "McMagic Girl" as well. I really need to remember when to act human and when to just be normal.
Another thing I noticed is that my hair's already fading back to it's original yellowish color, so maybe I can try a different hair dye this time... and hope that it'll actually turn the color I want.
Anyways...
Back into the bus.
And more driving.
Seriously, I'm pretty much convinced that Hagen's doing this for the long break.
Two rest stops, a fast food restaurant, and three hours later, we arrived.
Well, here it is... Massachusetts Institute of Technology, or MIT for short. I guess I'll be staying here with Delmar?
Honestly, I've always assumed that professors and teachers lived in the buildings they worked in. Though, now that I see the nearby apartment complexes, I'm beginning to doubt that.
Based off of what you just wrote there, I'm assuming that you've arrived?
Yup. How'd you access my tablet even without any internet access? I haven't connected to any wifi networks, and I'm not using my mobile data right now.
Let's just say that I've still got access to some mockup satellites I sent up at school for imaging. They've all got radio modules in them, so I just rigged them to fake a GPS signal.
But how are you able to chat? Wouldn't that only allow you to fake my location?
Eh, i'm using a glitch I noticed in the GPS to access information in other apps. It's basically just a memory overflow. Just spam the app enough times and there's a chance that you get in.
So... like those custom games people made using memory glitches in Super Mario World?
Pretty much.
Okay. I gotta go now.
K.
I momentarily glared at the lone "K" that appeared on-screen.
Meh.
Pretty spacey in here.
And noisy. Though that's probably due to the fact that I'm currently standing in the middle of a frenzy.
You're beginning to sound like you're trying to describe something that you have no idea about, Gadget.
:P
Oh hey, Delmar.
I stepped forward, and proceeded to trip on a random cable, falling face-first. Normally, I'd be unfazed, but when you're in the form of a human, the fall seems to be multiplied by two due to the additional height.
I woke up in a fluffy bed. Amazingly, I was still in my "human form", and for that, I'm glad, 'cause I really don't want anyone knowing that I'm actually a highly intelligent equine that may very well be from an alternate universe created unintentionally by a children's show.
Wow. That's a lot to take in at once when you think about it. I mean, Delmar and Hagen took it pretty well, Ranell seemed fine by it, but everyone else? I doubt that they'd manage to keep calm.
Now, about the name of this log. Before I started this log, Delmar came into the room and told me that he had brought me back to his apartment, since I couldn't live on the MIT campus like I did back at the old lab. Because of that, I'd have to stay at my new home all day while he worked, and we'd be able to work on the supposed "Back to Equestria" plan I've been thinking about during the evening.
Hey, Gadget.
Hi Ranell. What's up?
Not much, but after reading about you staying at Delmar's apartment, wouldn't someone eventually find out that you're not in school?
Are you serious? Living in a research facility like I did pretty much counted as my schooling all the way 'till college. Heck, I read textbooks before going to bed.
Yeah, but all it takes is one slip, and people would be coming in to take you away in no time. You have to either drop the human disguise completely, or go to school.
But... if i drop the disguise, then I wouldn't be able to go outside, or even look out the windows...
So you're going to school?
I guess. What about you? You've been living in that hospital for how long now?
Eh, a few years now. I do online courses.
Um... I'm not entirely sure if Delmar would let me do those. Even after all these years, he still limits my internet access to my tablet, and even then it still only lets me watch a few videos and stuff like that.
But you can hack your way through, can't you?
I'm pretty sure that it's hard-coded into the NIC chipset. Delmar usually gets everything custom-made.
Darnit. You'd have to get an entirely new device then.
Yup. And I highly doubt that Delmar's gonna get me another tablet anytime soon.
Yeah. So...
Yup. I'm gonna probably be going to some private school or something.
So now that that's out of the way, I've gotta tell Delmar when he gets back. Not to mention the fact that I'm gonna have to amp up my "daughter of some famous guy" attitude or whatever it is that those so-called "popular girls" in TV shows do.
Either way, I'd have to act like Delmar's daughter enough to the point of which they'd think he really is my legal guardian.
Watching TV gets boring when you watch it for too long. Three spongebob episodes later and I felt like my eyeballs were gonna leak onto the floor. I need to find something better to do. Normally if I were still at the lab, I'd just go off and find some newbie and help keep them from blowing something up, but when you're crammed in a tiny apartment that's smaller than some storage rooms at the lab? The choices are limited.
I mean, yeah, I can probably get some light gaming going if I get enough parts together to build a scrappy computer, but I doubt that it would last very long. Delmar's already let me download games on my tablet as well, but popping pigs with birds also gets tiring.
I'M BORED.
Naps are good for when you feel like your brain's gonna implode out of boredom. Delmar came back around 9:30-ish, and mumbled something about crazy teenagers as he plopped onto the couch beside me. Since I'm not near the windows or anything, I was back in my normal body, which meant ear scritches from Delmar.
Totally not acting like a housecat right now. Ignore the purring noises. IGNORE. THEM.
Neural command received. Ignoring all "purring" noises.
Wait, WHAT?! NEURAL COMMAND?! WHAT?!?!
Ooohhhhh... that felt good.
Ugh. My thoughts are getting fractured again. Both out of tiredness and because of ear scritches feeling so good.
I just realized how awkward I'd look if I was still a human girl while I'm getting these ear scritches.
Obviously sarcastic though. What is it that I could look forward to at school when I already know everything they can teach? Delmar decided that putting me with others my age would work the best, and so I'm kinda sorta stuck in the tail end of 5th grade as a "transfer student".
I wonder how well my illusion will hold up when I'm bored out of my mind?
...
Ooh, I could maybe drop it for a second and put it back up to make the kids think that they're seeing things!
Gadget, are you sure that's a good idea?
Yuppers!
'Cause what if you don't get your illusion back up in time?
...Then everyone would know...
Yup.
Yeah... Didn't really think that one through.
Neuropathic link established.
Backpack, check.
Textbooks, check.
Tablet, check, 'cause I'm obviously using it if I'm logging this.
Squirt gun to get the little buggers off of me during recess, check.
Pocket terminal, check.
Broadband internet, check.
Augmented reality headset, check.
"GADGET, WHY IS THERE A TASER ON THE TABLE?!" Delmar yelled from the main room.
Oops. Forgot to pack that.
"Gadget," Delmar said in a creepily calm voice when he entered the room, "In what circumstance would you use a taser at an elementary school?!"
I shrugged. "Self-defense?" I replied. I warily eyed the taser, of which I designed myself from scrap parts in the lab.
Delmar sighed. "You know, Gadget," he began, "the real world isn't that dangerous, you know that, right? And besides, you've been practicing that "magic" of yours lately. I'm sure that you'll be safe without a taser."
I nodded, and floated the taser back to my tiny room.
First day of school's tomorrow. I'm packed and ready to face whatever boredom that confronts me, whether it's in the form of overly irritating classmates, or the "typical" boring teacher.
Aaaaand nevermind, it's pretty much just as I expected it to be. Though, the teacher seems pretty nice. I packed a few energy bars in my backpack just in case if my disguise starts to fizzle, too. Between trying not to completely dominate the class in everything and keeping up said disguise, I'd have to say that the first day actually isn't all that bad so far.
I'm also glad that my disguise hides the faint light that appears when I'm manipulating objects. That'd be a dead giveaway to the fact that I'm just pretending to be human.
And for my disguise to drop in the middle of math during 5th grade? Nope. Just... no.
Okay, I should probably be doing more than just staring off into the distance while I'm typing this. Let's see what this worksheet has to throw at me.
Neuropathic Link Established
50x5=250... easy,
72x3=216
12x7=84
Dang, these are pretty easy.
Heh, let's just throw this one into the mix, shall we?
(4x²-9)=(2x+3)(2x-3)
Let's see how Ms. Julie handles that when she grades these.
"What's that?"
Wha-- "Oh, um... hi, er..." I trailed off at the sight of the girl next to me.
"Lily."
"Ok. Hi, Lily," I began, "so... you were wondering what I was writing?"
Lily nodded her head, still staring at the factorization that I had just done.
"It's called factorization. You'll see it when you're in... high school? Yeah, pretty sure you'll see it in high school."
I smirked as her brain attempted and failed many times over to process what I said. probably shouldn't be breaking their minds though. They've got their own worries.
Lily shook herself back from her stupor, and began attempting to solve 34x7.
Just what I suspected. 'Cause you know... me already getting experience from years of helping out in the lab and all... yeah.
Oh hey,lunch bell.
Cafeteria's a bit small by my standards, but taking into account as how it's apparently both the gym and a lunchroom, I'm not complaining for the school's money saving strats. Lunch itself was kinda meh, but aren't all school lunches? I mean, I don't have any experience with stuff like this, but I've read and watched videos, and generally school lunch is represented as either bombarded in the microwave, or as pre-cooked slabs of somethings.
Though, I probably shouldn't be stereotyping. This mac n' cheese is actually pretty good.
Wait... why are those kids going out the back door? Aren't they supposed to go back to class?
I quickly shoveled the rest of my lunch into my mouth, grabbed my backpack, and ran after the next few kids who were about to leave.
"Why are you going outside?" I asked, blocking the door, "What about finishing school?"
The three boys scoffed. "Duh, it's called recess, blondie. Now get out of our way!"
Oh yeah. Right. I completely forgot that most elementary schools have 1st recess after lunch.
Yeah.
But geez, those guys could've been a bit nicer, y'know? 'Cause seriously, blondie? Sheesh.
The playground was actually pretty big compared to even the jogging track that circled the lab. Altogether, I'm estimating that it's almost 2 football fields across, and one wide.
At least there's somewhere I can sit and read.
Fifteen minutes of reading about theoretical physics later and it's time to go back to class and start the whoooole cycle all over again.
After a gruelling process of reading through the textbook to finish the next few week's worth of homework, I'm pretty sure that I'll be perfectly fine in terms of grades for a little while. At least I can go back home now.
Half an hour drive to school, half an hour back. Why couldn't we have chosen something closer?! I can tell that Delmar's probably working on something big, too, considering as how he's just kinda... wilted... in the driver's seat as we're driving home.
I didn't see any point in recording my day at school today again in a log, mainly because it's pretty much a repeat of yesterday. Though, one thing that did actually put some of my interest in was how flirtatious some of the boys at recess seem to be. And not just towards me, but to pretty much every female in the area.
Long story short, they know not to mess with the girl that has a pneumatic high-pressure squirt gun in her backpack.
But... yeah, besides that, school was pretty meh. Just like yesterday.
Also, Delmar seemed a lot more awake today, and I found out why: Instead of working, he was allowed time off to speak with his project manager about a possible experiment involving multiple dimensions.
Taking into account as to how technically, interdimensional travel counts as inter-universal travel, I can pretty much assume now that my long run home is just about to begin!
(And yes, interdimensional travel is inter-universal travel, as long as you travel through a high-enough dimension. I believe it's somewhere along either the 6th or 8th dimensions that allow one to "hop universes". Either that or you have to charge all the way through the 10th one.)
Log 4049: On the topic of interdimensional travel:
Okay, so blah blah blah, school things, blah blah something about using my squirt gun on those boys, you get the gist of it.
Now, onto the real point, 'cause Delmar said that he was gonna set aside some time to talk with me.
"So, Gadget," Delmar began as he dried a dish, "do you have any ideas on how you're gonna get back to Equestria?"
I shook my head sadly. "Most of the things I can think about are either suicidal, or would bring doom to the world."
Delmar paused for a moment, idly polishing the dish beyond dry as he thought.
"How about an artificial wormhole?" he replied at last, setting the plate down, "As long as the gravitational field is stabilized, it should theoretically allow for passage."
I raised a brow. "Continue?" I said, writing the idea on a paper.
Delmar sighed. "Taking into account that we're talking theoretical physics here, I can't be entirely sure that it would work. There's also always the possibility of the wormhole becoming unstable, and collapsing on itself."
I grinned as I recalled a bit of a movie I remember watching on one of those old 'blu-ray' players.
"Like Big Hero 6?" I asked, remembering how the wormhole had begun sucking everything up around it.
The professor sighed. "Yeah, pretty much. Those Disney folks definitely did their research."
My grin faded away, leaving a frown in its place. If the wormhole is gonna work the same way as it did in that old show, then I'd be terrified to go through it.
"What if Equestria isn't an entirely different universe, but just an entirely different planet?" I suddenly blurted, my mind racing faster than my mouth could keep up with. As a result, it came out more like "What if Equestia want a entirely giffert--" before I slowed myself down.
"What?"
"What if Equestria isn't an entirely different universe, but just a different planet in our own universe?"
"So basically," he began, "you're saying that it's possible that the creations of our own imagination essentially 'loop-back' into our own realm of existence?"
"Yup. Pretty much."
Suddenly, Delmar's face lit up, before suddenly turning into an obviously regretful expression. "Gadget, do you remember... how we met?"
I rolled my eyes. "Yeah, you pretty much were going trigger happy, and then I got stuffed into an animal control truck."
"Do you remember how often you teleported around the lab when I first brought you there?"
Ah, I see where this is going.
I can tell that you were a pretty fussy filly back then.
Ay, Ranell! Why weren't you on for the past few days?
I was too busy reading your old logs. There are several thousand, y'know.
Uh huh. I'll talk to you later. It's getting hard to write the current log of my conversation with Delmar and talk to you at the same time. See ya!
yeah. Bye.
So anyways...
"Yeah," I replied to Delmar, "so are you saying that I might be able to teleport to Equestria?"
The professor nodded.
If my gut's telling me the truth, this'll either be very exciting, or the most agonizingly hard-to-do thing I've ever faced. 'Cause y'know, teleporting through dimensions and all.
Wait a second... didn't I teleport to Earth when I was a foal?!
Well then. I guess I could try it a second time. If I even can do it at all anymore.
Now that Delmar and I both have a basic plan for how to get me home, I guess we're both gonna go our separate ways, and whoever figures it out first gets... idunno... and ice cream or something.
The problem with my idea of teleporting back is that I'll need to practice. And since the majority of my day is taken up by school now, I'd either have to cram the practice and possibly kill myself in a screw up, or try to avoid everyone at school and practice during recess.
Either way, I'd have to be very careful. And since I've got school for the next three days, I guess I could try both methods.
Blegl. More busy work. Hm.
I raised my hoof hand.
"Ms. Julie?" I asked, waving from behind my book fort, "May I use the restroom?"
Ms. Julie nodded. I don't really think that she cares about what I do anymore, as long as I'm not disrupting the rest of the class.
Okay, so I'm outside the classroom now. There's a couple of security cameras in the corner, but if I hide behind the garbage cans, then they won't be able to see me when I teleport.
Just walk normally and act casual. Pretend you're walking towards the bathroom, and... dive!
Luckily, the classroom opposite to the trash cans had it's door closed, so no-one saw me miss and land in the trash. Either way, the moment I saw the garbage cans drawing close to my face, I instinctively teleported to the first location I had on mind.
Unfortunately, I teleported to the wrong bathroom.
Hopefully the kid at the urinal doesn't notice the girl who just appeared in a literal flash in one of the stalls.
By the way, you may be wondering how I'm logging this when my tablet's so bulky. Let's just say that I've got a pocket terminal I linked over an empty FM band to the serial console on my tablet.
Gadget, literally nobody asked.
Yeah? Doesn't mean that I can't write my logs in a way so anyone reading it knows what's going on.
Eh. Have it your way. I'll stay silent for now.
Yeah. Chat later, Ranell.
Okay, the boy left. Without flushing or washing his hands, unfortunately. Since I'm only doing this for teleportation practice, I guess I could try jumping floors to the small student-use rooms downstairs.
3,2,1... aaaand I'm here. I'm not entirely sure what good this practicing would do for jumping beyond the boundary of the universe, but I guess it's something. I might as well go back to class now. And that brings us back to the book fort. I built it in the corner of the classroom next to the door, so I'd be able to teleport back in, and make it look like I walked back instead.
I flashed back to class, and quietly closed the door I had left open earlier to make it seem like I came back. Hopefully, nobody noticed the brief flash of light that appeared in the reflection in the window.
But... judging by the surprised looks I'm getting, they did.
They saw me yesterday teleport in. What would they think?! Would they realize I'm not human? Would I get shipped to some crazy mad scientist's lab? How would Delmar react? I haven't told him about it yet, but I'm sure he'll find out so--
"Gadget?"
Hooo boy, I'm dead meat.
"Gadget, could you come over here please?"
Welp. It's either face Delmar or be an eternal prisoner in my room forever.
I slowly walked down the stairs, watching for anything that could point to my doom.
"Gadget!" Delmar said, appearing at the bottom of the stairs, "Your Principal wants to see you!"
I froze.
"He wants to talk about some sort of 'incident' from yesterday that he heard about from your teacher." Delmar went up a few steps, and whispered, "I'd recommend that you disguise yourself now, Gadget."
I nervously nodded, and cast on my 'disguise'. And then I fell down the stairs. 'Cause y'know, one should never try and distort reality at the top of a flight of stairs, no matter how short the staircase is.
"OOF!" I grunted as I landed at the bottom. Though it looked painful, it really isn't. Just another quirk of being apparently as disaster proof as some colorful cartoon characters, I guess.
"Gadget?" The principal asked as he pulled me up, "Are you alright?"
I weakly nodded, trying the best I could to appear dazed, if not slightly concussed.
The principal turned to Delmar. "Should I call an ambulance?" he asked worriedly, looking between me and Delmar.
The professor shook his head. "Nah, she's fallen enough times now that she'll be fine in a few minutes."
I nodded, forgetting that I was pretending.
"Oh... alright." the principal replied, "Now then. About yesterday."
I really regret forgetting that I was supposedly dazed.
"Your teacher, Ms. Julie, as you know her, sent me an email yesterday about the strange occurance of you entering with a blinding flash. I'm concerned about this, Gadget. Do you have any history of violence?"
Delmar answered for me. "No she doesn't." he said, "In fact, she's been quite a good little lady for all these years, haven't you?"
I faked a smile, and nodded accordingly.
"Along with that," the principal continued, "multiple students have been reporting sightings of you appearing and vanishing from one second to the next without any trace."
Aaand he finally got to the point.
"Along with this 'teleportation' phenomenon, you've been associated with those bright flashes that occurred in multiple locations."
I looked to Delmar, who raised a brow.
"The key point is, who are you, Gadget?"
My eyes darted about the room, searching for something I could use.
"I'm... uh..." I saw a detective movie playing on TV in the background. "I'm Secret Agent..." quickly, my eyes continued their search, but failed fantastically, leaving my brain to fill in the blanks. "Doorknob!"
Delmar winced, facepalming at my epic fail as my principal groaned with impatience.
"Gadget, until you tell me what's really going on, I'm gonna have to suspend you. So either speak up, or don't come."
Um...
Once again, my mind raced ahead of my logic, pushing as many words as it could to my mouth.
"I'M A SO-CALLED 'MAGICAL UNICORN' FROM THE LAND OF EQUESTRIA IN A TV SHOW THAT AIRED ALMOST HALF A CENTURY AGO!" I blurted.
I'm pretty sure that I just dug myself into a deeper hole, considering as how I'm currently being taken to the hospital to screen for drug abuse.
I woke up inside the police car I was escorted into this morning while I was still in the haze of sleep.
Well, this is great. Juuuussst great. I'm crammed into the back of a police car, being taken in for drug screening, and even after I'm clear, I'm sure that they're gonna ship me off to another mental hospital of some sort.
I gotta get out soon.
Looks like we're getting on the freeway. What I don't get is why they didn't have any drug testing equipment on-hand. That would've been reeeeaaaal handy right around now.
Come to think of it, why isn't the officer wearing any sort of uniform? He had one on earlier, before he stopped for some coffee...
Waaaaaaaiiiiit...
Why does his face look different?!
Neural link severed. Likely reason: Blunt force trauma.
Log 4052_1: I'm most definitely messing with this guy.
I woke to the sounds of a door being locked, followed by heavy footsteps up a set of stairs. Apparently this idiot has absolutely no idea who he's messing with. Earlier on, in the car, I wouldn't have been able to teleport out because of the metal body, but now that I'm in a musty ol' basement, it's just a matter of figuring out where I am, and then pinpointing a location. I pulled my tablet from my backpack, and opened the GPS, which responded with a light "ding!".
Oops. Probably shouldn't be making too much noise. I turned the volume all the way down, and refocused on my location.
Of which happened to be unavailable due to me being in a basement.
I tried using network location instead. Once again, nothing. This guy must've lined his entire floor with aluminum foil or something, 'cause I'm not getting any signal. Not even the radio app detects anything besides static.
Sooo... I guess I'm trapped in a basement. Lucky me that I'm not actually human. If that guy comes back down without pants then he's in for a surprise.
And by surprise, I mean that his face is gonna be whacked off by the tiny unicorn with a chunk of concrete. Either that or my backpack full of lab equipment and textbooks is gonna pelt him.
Oh yeah, and my pneumatic high power water gun. Yeah. I've got this.
Now time to play the "weak kidnapped kid" role.
"Hello?" I cried weakly as I knocked the door, "Anybody there? Let me out! I'm hungry!"
There was silence at first, but I heard the sound of footsteps draw closer. I made sure to keep my illusion on, and 'cower' in the corner. At this point, I don't even know why I'm baiting this guy so hard anymore. He's not even a threat to me, and I'm still messing with him.
But meh. I'm bored.
He unlocked the door, and slowly came down the stairs. Good, he's still got clothes on.
"Whaddya want, laddy?" He grunted, tossing a pack of crackers at me, "I'm waitin' for that ransom pay from your old man and the PD."
I smiled sinisterly. "Oh, it's not what I want."
He took a step forward. "What ya sayin' to me, missy?"
I smirked. "Oh, I'm just gonna say that you'll be wanting to call the hospital for an early pick-up."
He raised a brow. "HA, you? And how are ya gonna even leave a scratch on me?"
I dropped the disguise and lit my horn. "Care for some scorch marks?" I asked slyly, forming a fireball from congregated dust.
The guy who was supposedly holding me for ransom jerked back. "WHAT ARE YOU?!" he cried, pulling a gun from a previously unnoticed holster, "WHAT DO YA WANT FROM ME?!"
I shrugged, dropping the fireball onto the concrete, where it promptly extinguished with a puff. "Me? I'd like it if you just let me out, turn yourself in, and drop the gun."
He raised the gun at me shakily. "WITCH!" He shouted, "I KNEW IT! I KNEW THERE WERE WITCHES ON THIS EVIL PLANET! WIIIITCH!"
My blood ran cold. I could die right here, right now. This guy was losing it quickly, however. I might be able to bend him even more.
I raised a barrier around me by levitating the oxygen molecules, holding them in place. I wouldn't be able to run without dropping the shield, and if I drop it, I might get a bullet to the brain.
So instead, I continued trolling.
"Ah, so you think I'm a witch?" I asked, mentally focusing on the image of a storybook witch.
I quickly shifted to the form of said witch, complete with the green skin and pupil. "Is this witchy enough for you?" I asked, before further altering my image to that of a young girl with a broomstick. "Or do you prefer anime?"
"STOP IT!" He yelled, his body trembling with fear, "JUST... STOP!"
I dropped the illusion, reappearing as my human self.
"Y'know, it's funny how a grown man is afraid of a filly such as myself. Even funnier is the fact that you don't even realize what's going on behind you."
Right as he turned, a SWAT officer stepped down the final stair, eyeing him fiercely.
Yup. I secretly dialed Delmar, who then triangulated my position and alerted the cops. I wonder if the one this guy knocked out is still sleeping on the pooper?
I believe that in the process of saving my own butt, I've managed to accidentally royally screw myself over.
And by that, I mean that I'm all over the news now as the girl who mentally wrecked her own kidnapper. School's been harsh on me with the counselors asking if I was okay and all, but generally, I think that if I managed to mess up a guy's mind as far as I did, then I'm probably fine as far as mental health goes.
Ooh, and here comes another reporter. Geez, can't a not-so-normal not-actually-human girl live in peace?
"Tell us, Gadget, how did you escape?"
I shrugged, playing it cool to keep my secret safe. "Oh, y'know, blabbering on and on 'till he couldn't take it anymore, y'know?"
The reporter raised an eyebrow. "But the police say that he's been ranting about dark magic and witchcraft. Could you explain to us why he might've done so?"
Oh. They want the truth. Well then.
"Uh..." I began, "Do I have to answer?"
The reporter shook her head. "No, you don't, but it'd be nice if you shared some information. Things like this happen every day, and advice from a kidnapping survivor would do quite well for any future victims."
Dangit, is she trying to shame me?!
"Listen," I said harshly, slapping my hand (hoof?) on the table, surprising my interviewer/reporter/whoever, "I still gotta do my homework, so if you'd kindly step aside please--"
"Gadget!" Delmar called from the kitchen, "Do you wanna read this paper about creating wormholes? You might just be able to open that portal to go back home!"
...WHY, DELMAR, WHY DO YOU HAVE TO BE SO SCATTERBRAINED?! DOES HE EVEN REMEMBER ANSWERING THE DOOR TO A REPORTER?!
As my mental scolding continued, I tried to put on the most clueless and innocent face I could muster in the light of hearing Delmar asking if I wanted to open a wormhole to Equestria.
"Um... I can explain?" I squeaked quietly, shrinking down further with each word.
The confused reporter nodded. "Yes, please."
I sighed. "Well, do you want the simple truth, or the full truth? 'Cause with what you've just heard and likely broadcast live, it probably wouldn't matter anyways if you know now."
"Gadget?" Delmar called again.
"WAIT A SEC, DAD" I shouted back, "DON'T YOU REMEMBER THAT I'M BEING INTERVIEWED?!"
I swear I could almost hear him stop dead in his tracks. He knows he screwed up. I'll deal with his self-shaming later.
The reporter continued again after my reply to Delmar.
"So, you say that you have a simple truth, and the full truth. Care to explain the differences?"
I shrugged. "The simple truth is just that-- simple. The problem is, you'd likely mark me as insane if I told you the simple truth. Though, if I were to tell the full truth, or... heck, even show you the full truth, then I doubt that I'd be left alone ever again."
The reporter facepalmed, before continuing, "Well, if both options appear just as bad as the other, and you know that this could be vital information to prevent future kidnappings and murders, then why don't you tell us both truths?
Well then. Here it goes... I guess.
"So, start with the simple truth? The one that's dumbed down enough to fit in a single sentence?"
The reporter nodded patiently.
I took a deep breath. "I'm actually a unicorn pony that was unfortunately nicknamed 'Smurf Horse' by some kids at a hospital."
GADGET, WHAT ARE YOU DOING?!
Heeey Ranell, chill. They already have suspicions, and I don't see any reason to hold it back now that Delmar's kinda already given them hints.
Heh. Good luck with the chaos.
Yep.
I could tell during that short conversation with Ranell that the reporter was trying to stifle a laugh. I mean, who in the right of mind would just say "Oh, I'm a magical happy unicorn that looks like a smurf!"? Well... I did...I guess...
Once the reporter calmed down, she began writing notes for the newspaper. 'Cause apparently she works at both the TV station and the newspaper. Finally, she looked back up, and kindly said, "Continue?"
Welp. Here's the doozy.
"Okay now... the full truth." I began, "My name is Gadget, and though I may look human," I paused, and dropped my disguise, shocking both the cameraman and the reporter into dead silence. "I really am a unicorn, and along with multiple abilities that humans have only dreamt of, such as teleportation and near-effortless levitation, I have recently discovered that I originated from an alternate universe unintentionally created by a kids' show from nearly half a century ago."
Now that that's out, I just gotta wait and see what's gonna happen. Probably chaos, like what Ranell said.
Like, worse than ever. I've now taken on a new disguise to avoid recognition from the public, but it's beginning to become pretty taxing to keep the illusion going for so long at a time.
I'm starting to regret doing the whole "Crazy Reveal" thing I did yesterday, and for now,I'm just hiding under my bed. In the form of an oversized cat, that is.
'Cause why be bipedal when you can just walk normally in a different form? I mean, sure, being "human" has its advantages, but as a cat, I don't have to worry as much anymore about whether or not I'm gonna trip the next step I take.
Delmar himself's been beating himself up as well. I'm pretty sure he still hasn't left the table downstairs yet. Last I saw him, he was surrounded by beer cans.
Well then. So apparently, after all the ruckus about me not being human and someone realizing that I lived with Delmar, things didn't exactly turn out well.
While I was staring out the one-way window, I noticed that Delmar was in a pretty bad mood. Turns out that he'd been fired for the chaos that resulted from before, so now we're floating on the few thousand that he's got left.
And during the time Delmar spent passed out last night, he must've dreamt of Smurf. Unfortunately.
'Cause seriously, this guy's wearing a full-blown Gargamel costume, calling me Asrael. And also, he's blabbering away about some sort of forest laboratory-whatever.
Did I mention that along with thinking of himself as Gargamel, he's got a "ruler wand" now?
Well whoop-de-freakin'-doo, Gadget. Seems like he's gone off the deep end.
Ay, Ranell... yeah, pretty much. I wonder what happened to make him go this far?
The beer, maybe? I mean, alcohol can screw you up pretty badly.
Yeah, I guess. Though, I'm not entirely sure about Delmar's ability to help me get back to Equestria anymore. I don't think he's sane enough, and even if we do manage to get there, he'd likely chase me through and treat the ponies like smurf-horses. Y'know, like as in, 'harvesting their essence/magic' sorta stuff.
Yeah. Hey, maybe find Hagen again. He'd probably be happy to help.
Sooooo... yeah, Delmar's drunk again, and he still thinks he's Gargamel. It seems like Ranell was able to contact Hagen, luckily, since right now I'm back on his ol' bus. As for Delmar, he's gonna be in rehab for a while.
"That Delmar fellow of yours was pretty crazy back there, wasn't he?"
I nodded my head, making sure that Hagen could see in the mirror. Now that I'm away from everyone else, I assume that it's safe to just be myself, undisguised. Though, with the public fiasco about me going on, I'm not even sure if the disguise is necessary anymore, since people would recognize me in it...
Oh wait. I forgot that it's not the only thing I've got.
Heh, I could be a goat if I wanted to.
...
...
I just realized that I seem to have the shapeshifting abilities of a "Changeling" from the show. Am I a changeling?
I highly doubt that you're a Changeling, Gadget. From what I've seen in the show, the Changelings not only visibly change their form, but physically, as well. You disguise yourself by bending light around you into an image of whatever you're disguised at, so you still have access to all your abilities.
Eh. Makes sense. Though I still have my doubts.
???
GRARRR!
...really, Gadget? Really?
*snerk*
So yeah, probably not a Changeling, but I won't know for sure until I'm back in Equestria.
Speaking of Changelings, I've also found a few old MLP comics, including one about the backstory of Changelings. Pretty interesting, considering as how they apparently got their holes from being blasted into a desolate wasteland. I mean, seriously, wouldn't they die from having holes physically punched into them? Like, sure, maybe the blasts also cauterized the wounds, but I doubt that one could possibly live for very long with so much of their body missing.
Not much goin' on. I skipped a few days due to the fact that Hagen's been practically yodeling the entire time that we were driving back.
But now that we are...
I just learned that to even reach the level of technology required to send something through a portal of some sort would either be completely unreachable, or would leave me as a frail old mare before it's even half-done.
So I guess teleportation practice it is.
I really don't see much of a point in daily logs anymore, with so much stuff just being repeated.
Oh boy, I can feel my new disguise slipping already.
Walkin' faster,
Running fast,
Running faster,
Aaaaand of course, I trip. Who'd expect that? I sure did.
Gadget, what are you doing, anyways? Your tablet's GPS tells me that you've been all over the city today.
Oh, just buying supplies.
Supplies for what?
I figured that based on how easy Twilight made it look in the Equestria Girls movies to reactivate a portal, why not try it myself?
Are you sure that this won't end in disaster? You seem to be heavily relying on footage from the show as backing to your logic.
I'm sure it's okay, Ranell. After all, what could go wrong?
I'd advise that you don't say that very often.
???
Never mind...
Alright, back in the lab! I've got my hiding couch, my room, (which now smells oddly of mops and brooms), and best of all, a small basement room in which I could construct my portal!
I highly doubt that I'll have time to log each and every second of each day now. I've been testing the portal, casting "spells" on it, and once or twice even accidentally lighting something on fire.
And yes, Twilight did make it look easy when she simply forced open the portal. While she just happened to pull random parts from some closet or box or something off screen and made the portal work just like that, I've gotten a contract to use an experimental room-sized particle accelerator to closely track the effects of what could possibly come from traversing dimensions.
In order for me to "pop" from this universe to the next, I've essentially got to maneuver myself through the theoretical tenth dimension, which holds every possibility of every possible timeline of every possible universe, and so on. But even then, I still have to figure out exactly which universe I come from. It'd be pretty weird if I ran into myself in a universe where I never left Equestria.
Though, I do have my DNA sequence that I can track through each universe. Even in alternate universes, no two strands of DNA should be the same, according to what I've worked out in my head. Along with that, I can additionally narrow it down to find universes containing traces of my DNA that lack my physical presence, and from there I'd simply have to pick out the one with the correct timeline.
As for Hagen, he's told me that the medics plan on sending Delmar with me, since his mental state is still in shambles. And according to them, a place like Equestria would be perfect for healing his mind.
But then comes the question of what would happen once I arrive in Equestria. In the movie, the portal turns ponies into humans, and vice-versa. I'm not entirely sure if that would be the case with my own portal, but frankly, as long as I'm in Equestria, I'm fine with it. As for Delmar, it'd be interesting to see him as a pony.
Oh, and also, considering as to how my baby self probably didn't use a network of quantum computers, particle accelerators, and loads of government funding to get here, I'm starting to get a bit suspicious on whether or not I was sent to this universe on purpose, like some sort of banishment on the highest possible level or whatever. Though, for all I know, it might just be Discord.
Either way, I did also have to make a promise to help create a trade deal between Equestria and Earth through a scaled-up version of my portal once I make contact. After all, what government would throw money into a portal-building project without expecting returns? And this portal is designed to be two-way, after all.
I'll just sit here and hope things go well.
...
...
Well freakin' geez. I just realized that I'm barely even in my pre-teen years yet, and I'm already the second in charge in the construction of a device that literally transverses reality.
Hmmf. Apparently last night someone managed to sneak into the facility and steal several server modules from our datacenter. There wasn't any data actually lost, with the backups and all, but now that we know that some screwup has their hands on very secretive information, I'm starting to wonder if I should try and hunt them down myself.
After all, what good is a lawyer when all they do is ask for money to shout at people? Why not take matters into my own han--hooves?
I mean, seriously. We already had plans to open source certain parts of the portal once it's confirmed to work, but at such an early stage such as now? There could be pretty bad things coming around if they try to reconstruct a version of the portal.
Heck, they even recently got Ranell to help out on the team, since it'd be better off for him to spend time doing something productive than to look up random things on the internet all day out of boredom. He's been working with the physicists to develop possible methods to open and stabilize wormholes.
But geez, I wonder what the saboteur has in mind right now for the data they stole? They didn't seem to leave behind any trace either. No DNA, no footprints, no nothing. It's just like as if they took the data from within. Like, they were working on the portal themselves, and one day decided to up and leave with four server modules in tow. If they managed to not leave footprints anywhere as well, (which they didn't, and this floor gets scuff marks like there's no tomorrow.) then I'm gonna assume that they somehow brought a quadcopter or a drone of some sort in during the night and floated the servers out through some vent or something.
I really don't know. My thinking's been off for a while now, with all this leading the entire squad of scientists and all...
Not much to say, but it turns out that the servers weren't even missing in the first place. They were just unplugged and carted into a storage closet by the IT team so that they could make room for newer ones. And the lack of footprints was because they were apparently testing a roomba-powered server cart, and the nacho dust-coated Xbox controller on their desks prove it. (And so does the roomba-powered server cart driving around erratically.)
As far as progress on the portal goes, we haven't been able to do all that much recently due to the "missing" servers, but now that the data's been transferred, we can continue working on it.
Wow. It hasn't really been all that long at all, and we've already seen multiple breakthroughs. It's kinda funny, though, 'cause people have devoted their entire lives to this kinda stuff for a pretty long time, and yet we just wander in and progress faster in the field than anyone could've ever thought of. I'm not sure if it's the prospect of fame, a better life, money, or heck, even the feared "Interrogation Room A" that people were talking about when the servers went "missing". For all I know, we might just be lucky to have the technology we have today, and considering as to how I've technically done this before, we've also already got a reference of sorts to how things work.
Come to think of it, was it even me that hopped universes? I mean, sure, all pointers show that I probably did, but to have a foal do it before they could even talk...
Okay, that just sounds mildly stupid. But still, to be able to do something that big at such a young age shouldn't be possible. I'm starting to wonder if it was something else that might've brought me here. In the show, Princess Celestia banished her sister to the moon for threatening the safety of Equestria, as well as her life. Maybe perhaps back in Equestria, my family might've (un?)accidentally insulted the Princess, or even sent a death threat to her. whatever way it is, it would somehow have to end up with me being booted to here.
Or maybe it could even just be Discord messing with me in the long-run. Idunno.
Today I was allowed to take a day off, and let Ranell take over for me temporarily since we both have access to the designs. I guess that means that I am... free? I mean, sure, I've had plenty of off-time, but this time, since I've been an active part of the team itself, I'm not only allowed to take a break but go outside.
Well, I guess it's worth a shot, though I'll probably have to choose a different disguise considering how everyone out there knows me now.
Hmm... brunette, medium-tone skin, slightly-above-average height. Should be fine. I've gotten used to walking around as a biped, so I probably shouldn't have any balance issues like before.
Also, with all the abuse I've been throwing at my abilities recently with the portal construction, my "magical" strength feels a lot greater than before. I might just try a stealth teleport or two, in fact. In public.
My basic idea is that for a stealth teleport, just after I pinpoint an exit location for the localized wormhole, I also create a temporary illusion of myself in my previous position, feeding off of residual RF waves from things like cell towers and radios for energy until it can safely fade away. That way, I'd be able to look like I just walked into n alleyway or something, when in reality I'm already like, halfway across the city or something. Heck, I'd probably be able to teleport to the moon if I wanted to.
I guess there's nothing else to do but to actually try it now. Outside world, here I come!
Urk... the brightness. What is that fiery orb of doom in the sky that burns my eyes with such fury?
Just kidding, it's the sun. Duh.
Though, with the darker hair that I chose to cloak myself with, I think it'll be better if I first get a sunhat or something. Or maybe passively float a cloud over me the entire time. People wouldn't notice if a massive cloud seemed to follow one person, considering just how many people there are around here.
Sunhat, check. Sunglasses, check. Alright, let's see here. Casually walk down the busy sidewalk... 3... 2... 1... go!
Instantly, I reappeared back beside the storefront of the store I had exited.
Log 4090: Who cares that I'm a magical tiny horse?
After a while of hiding from the public and vowing to never step outside again, I've made up my mind.
Who freakin' cares that I'm a pony? Sure, I might have the capability to destroy humanity as we know it by diverting missiles with my telekinesis, but does that really matter?
I say that today I'm gonna go outside, struttin' in my full pony glamor, and not give a single care of it.
Uh, Gadget?
What?
What if you get kidnapped agai--
You know well now that I've proven my capability to break bones with my thoughts.
Um... okay...
Speaking of kidnapping, why don't I try to get kidnapped??? That sounds like great fun, compared to slaving away at datasheets and commanding my tiny army of labcoats!
I'ma go outside right now, and the first thing I'm gonna do is find the most rapist-looking guy in town!
Gadget...
WhAT???
Stop it. Get some help.
nOPe!
"Hello, guy with a creepy lookin' face standing in the dark alley with a cigarette!" I chirped happily as I trotted into said dark alley, "I'm Gadget!"
The man threw down his cigarette, raising a brow. "Eh?" He began, eyeing me curiously, "You ain't that horse-thing that's been stirring all this ruckus 'round here, are ya?"
I shrugged. "Depends on your definition of a ruckus. All I know is that I wanna be kidnapped for no reason other than to get away from the craziness!"
GADGET. REMEMBER. MAKE GOOD DECISIONS.
Shaddup. I'm telling you, this is gonna be fun!
Can't you just make it look like Hagen is holding you for ransom or something? Or maybe Delmar?
Nope! 'Cause they're my friends, and I say that it's better to find a random bum on the street than to risk harming them!
Gadget... just... why?
"Whatcha doin' there, lassy?" the man asked as I gazed off into the open during my conversation with Ranell, "You drunk or somethin'? Never heard of a drunk horse before, I gotta tell ya that."
Meh. This guy seems to know me too well to be willing to snatch me up. Next!
"Bye, Gadget!" the man yelled from behind me as I took off for the streets. Apparently he's not a bum. Just some random guy on a smoke break with a mildly creepy face. He should maybe shave sometime. Idunno. It's up to him.
Anyways, I'ma head back to the lab. I've got my entertainment for today, even if it was rather short.
Log 4092: I'm here to get kidnapped and blow some minds... and I've already been kidnapped. ~~(Part 1)~~
W00T! Ran into someone using my human disguise and got them to kidnap me! Though, to be fair, I did copy the looks of those ladies in this magazine that I found a while back in a closet... but, stingy clothing aside, YAY!
Gadget, I can tell that you've utterly lost it. And how have you not gotten your tablet taken from you yet?
Easy, I hid it.
... Need I ask how?
Simple. Disguised it as part of my miniskirt.
Uh huh. Okay. Tell me when you need someone to pick you up. I can get a taxi to you or something.
Anyways, so this guy is currently holding me for ransom, and just like what I hoped, he said that he's gonna do 'nasty things' to me if the ransom isn't paid.
Ooh! I'm hoping that he's planning on trying to tear off my miniskirt! Boy, is he gonna be in for a heck of a surprise when I throw him at the wall!
GADGET. SANITY. REMEMBER.
no!
Aaaand here he comes... looks like he was just denied the ransom, and from the looks on his face, his location's already been triangulated.
I'm guessing that he's wanting to do whatever it is that he wants to do to me ASAP. Fun!
Wait for it...
Wait for it...
Aaaand he's just getting a drink. Aww.
But hey, I'm tied up in this chair still. I'm Houdini!
He's coming back!
GADGET, CAN YOU PLEASE STOP DETAILING YOUR POTENTIAL RAPE?!
No, Ranell. We're gonna use this as evidence to haul this guy's butt off the streets.
Huh?
Gadget seems to be able to work her way through just fine, but once she starts detailing what he's doing to her, we'll know.
Guys? Can you stop talking so closely to the voice chat?
Hmmf. Fine.
He's set the drink down...
Ooh, he's running a hand towards my miniskirt... lifting it up now... reaching for my 'underwear'...
Aaaand... BAM! PONY TIME!
Hey voice log, enable!
"GAH!"
Heh, didn't expect that now, did you?
"WHAT THE FUU--"
"Tut, tut! No swears!" I shouted as I undid my ropes, lifting the man at the same time.
"And besides," I continued, "What did you really expect when you found a pre-teen wearing bikini at your front door? An easy target? PFFT. Ha!"
Okay, you know what? When that filly gets back here, give her the best therapist you can find. She needs help pronto.
"D-DEMON!" The man screamed, "WHAT ARE YOU?!"
I grinned wider than I'd ever grinned before. Or at least, it felt like that. Now, on to the theatrical stuff.
"Oh, little ol' me?" I began, slowly shifting into my next disguise-- a phoenix. "I am the one who avenges. The one who rises from the ashes of what once was..."
'Smoke' began to rise all around me. In reality, it was just me levitating a massive amount of dust in a single direction.
"I seek out only those who harm, those who hate. Those who take, with their grubby, greedy little hands."
"St-stay back!" The man stammered, backing into the corner, "I'm sorry! Please! I-- I repent! FORGIVE ME, O ETERNAL GODDESS!"
Heh. I've broken him already? This is gonna be more fun than I thought.
Due to time concerns, I'll split this chapter in half, since I can tell that y'all like this fic. Hopefully, I'll be able to get the second part completed sometime soon.
Log 4092: I'm here to get kidnapped and blow some minds... and I've already been kidnapped. ~~(Part 2)~~
I snorted. "Goddess?" I began, "Hardly. I prefer Gadget."
"OH, PLEASE FORGIVE ME, O' GREAT GADGET OF THE HEAVENS ABOVE!"
"Helloooo?" I asked, knocking my hoof on his head, "Anybody home?"
"ALL YE WHO SHAN'T REPENT SHALL BE BURNT IN THE PIT OF DOOM!"
Yeah, he's a goner. I wonder when the paramedics will arrive to take him to the crazy house? After all, he went from this big ol' Macho Guy type of person, who wanted to rape me, to this quivering pile of flesh that's currently worshipping me as their new goddess.
I grinned. "Tell me," I said, "Where is your god now?"
The man sniffed, wiping the wet streaks from his face. "Y-you, O' Great One."
I shrugged. "Wrong!" I answered, pointing directly at his chest, "You have control over yourself. You are the one who makes all your decisions."
"So... I am god?" he stammered weakly, still kneeling before me.
I shrugged again. "Beats me. If you're a god, then why am I holding you in your own basement?"
"Uuuuuuuuuuhhhhhhhhhh..."
"Exactly. Now, tell me what you were planning to do to me when you first saw me?"
"I don't believe that you'd like to hear, O' Great One."
Fair enough. I already know that this guy wanted to *ahem* raise my tail and all. But to be fair, I did lure him in a way. But technically, this just counts as being an undercover cop to catch all the bad guys!
The man stood back up, still visibly shaken from the whole 'I'm actually a phoenix' gag that I pulled off earlier. Now that I think of it, it's starting to get a bit tiring keeping this get-up running smoothly. What should I do next?... Meh, I'll just be myself... wait, I did that already.
Ooh! I'll just be him!
Poof!
"Ayyyyyy" I hollered, raising my now visibly gruff arms, "Huggies!"
I began to advance towards him, watching as his eyes grew to pinpricks as he attempted to squirm his way out of the situation.
"P-please! No!" He wailed as he backed into the stairwell door, "Forgive me!"
Even though it was pretty awkward for me, and terrifying for him, I proceeded to hug him, and using my 'magic', I squeezed him in a bear hug until the police came.
Okay, so that... was awkward. I don't remember all that much, but from what I've heard, that burst of insanity a week or two back was partially due to my extreme boredom, and partially due to apparently being put under extreme pressure. Basically, my sanity cracked.
But I'm all better now!
So yeah, while I was out cold in a medically-induced coma for a while, apparently Ranell took over my position, and was able to complete the portal! It's gonna be powered on by tomorrow. For now, we're running tests to ensure the stability of it.
Wow... it's actually complete. I mean, sure, the portal looks far more like a crazy particle-accelerator of doom, but some tests of sending tethered mice through the portal returned with safe (but slightly dazed) mice.
What I mean is, it works. We can't see what's on the other side, but whatever it is, it's safe.
Just in case though, I've brought a hazmat suit, airtight helmets, and several other essential things into the acceleration pod. You can never be too prepared for the theoretical apocalypse, y'know?
Also, Ranell told me that I should probably drag Delmar along as well. Ever since the news incident and his alcohol-related insanity, he's pretty much been ejected from the scientific community. He doesn't have any family anyways, so the rest of the peeps here agreed on letting me take him with me.
Basically, the way the portal works is by using a wormhole created by the repelling force of this so-called "exotic matter", which is held in place by strong magnetic fields. If the exotic matter ever degrades in any way, then the wormhole would become unstable with large masses passing through it, and immediately collapse.
What I'm worried about, though, is that the tests were done using smaller capsules and mice, not an SUV-sized box on maglev rocketing through with two passengers.
Anyways, Delmar's regained his sobriety, so he's agreed with me to help with being a possible diplomat between Equestria and here if we ever want to start trade relations. Since we don't know exactly where we'll exit from, or how fast we'll be ejected from the wormhole using the much larger maglev box, I've also made sure that the capsule is airtight, and could survive an impact that would normally only be survived by a tank.
Hopefully nothing goes wrong...
We're both in the capsule now, and the autopilot's rambling on about safety procedures that don't really do anything except to make you even more uncomfortable. Either way, we're strapped in, and waiting for the countdown. Since I'm pretty sure that we're both gonna be knocked out by the acceleration force, I'm gonna boot up the neuropathic link again for the log, since I don't exactly have to be conscious to think.
Ooh, the countdown's starting! Delmar's somehow managing to be perfectly chill with this. Like as in, he's strapped down, reading a novel kind of chill. How could he possibly be so calm???
Wait a sec now. I've gotta take the anesthesia they gave us if I don't want to feel like I'm getting torn in half. I'm pretty sure that Delmar already took it, considering how chill he is.
Urgh... these flashy lights...
I opened my eye just a crack, spotting Delmar out cold, book sitting on his face as the pod raced into the wormhole.
Soon, I felt myself slipping into unconsciousness as well. Partially due to the anesthesia working its magic, and partially due to the sheer G-forces.
It's kinda funny how I am apparently 'Internally Conscious'. Like, I don't actually have any physical control over my body right now, but instead, I'm just floating in this sort of weird, murky darkness of my own imagination.
Wait, does that mean that this thing logs dreams? Sweet!
I mentally blinked as a bright, golden sun rose above the horizon, banishing the darkness to the confines of the deepest parts of my mind. The vast, sprawling infrastructure of Equestria spiderwebbed beneath me as I gently hovered above my dreamwork.
And just as that happened, I felt a physical jolt as the real-life me lurched forwards from what apparently felt like an impact. I still can't really move though. The anesthesia also contained a temporary paralyzing agent to ensure that we wouldn't go into a seizure or something. All I know is that apparently, Equestria's very dark, and has extremely weak gravity.
At least, I think this is Equestria. I can't open my eyes yet, but from what little light is reaching through my eyelids, and the fact that I can barely feel my mane starting to scramble a bit, it honestly feels more like I'm in space or something.
