Twilight Sparkle shares some of her conspiracy theories with Fluttershy
Twilight is all about facts and figures, if she can't see it, smell it, touch it, taste it, hear it, or in any way completely prove something without any room for doubt, then she didn't take much notice of it...... except for conspiracy theories.
Twilight has a strange interest in conspiracy theories despite the fact she doesn't believe a single one, this is a fascination she shares with Fluttershy on a regular basis and one day, Twilight decides to spout some conspiracy theories of her own!
Twilight Sparkle was interested in a lot of things, star gazing, antiques, history, magic, there was a lot of things that the purple unicorn liked... though there was one thing that she couldn't admit that she had a fascination for, conspiracy theories. Despite her belief in Pinkie's bizarre assertion that she had a "Pinkie sense", Twilight Sparkle affirmed that as a mare of science and logic, she couldn't buy into the bizarre conspiracy theories of Equestria. There weren't a lot of conspiracy theories out there but there were more than enough for Twilight to look into, like the strange theory that the Chrysalis that attacked Canterlot was actually Luna in disguise, or the theory popularized by Lyra that there were humans living in Equestria.
Twilight had always steered clear of conspiracy theories but she had to admit that some conspiracy theories tended to make a modicum of sense, after all, why was Luna so absent during the attack on Canterlot and why did she ask if she'd missed anything like she hadn't known anything had happened? Twilight figured that if she could research and find credibility in the theories of science then she could at least entertain the theories of conspiracy, though she couldn't exactly admit that to any pony......... no pony except Fluttershy.
Fluttershy was a nervous pony and it didn't exactly surprise Twilight that Fluttershy bought into a decent amount of conspiracy theories, which is why she was so terrified of everything. Then the fateful day came that Twilight herself started to formulate her own conspiracy theories to share with Fluttershy.
"I mean... what I'm saying makes sense right? You get where I'm coming from don't you? It's so obvious! I can't believe I didn't see it before and I can't believe you're skeptical about it!" Twilight proclaimed, she had just dropped a bombshell of a conspiracy theory but Fluttershy was extremely doubtful of the claim, how could Pinkie Pie be a changeling?
Fluttershy went "Geez, I don't know Twilight, I mean... Pinkie Pie being a changeling? I know she's odd but that's just Pinkie Pie being Pinkie Pie, don't you think she would have told us that she was a changeling by now?"
Twilight rolled her eyes and went "Well DUH! She doesn't know that she's a changeling! Remember, a changeling can perfectly mimic any creature even if they haven't seen it before!"
Fluttershy nodded and said "OK... but how do you explain the pie family then? Are they all changelings?"
Twilight scoffed as she said "Of course not! They must have adopted Pinkie Pie or something, that would explain why she is so different from her family! She's a changeling!"
Fluttershy, still unsure, stated "Alright, present a case for your conspiracy theory and then I'll point out the flaws, if at the end of it I believe that your argument is even remotely believable... I'll post it anonymously on a conspiracy theory blog, if not... then you'll have to feed Angel"
Twilight raised her eyebrow as she asked "The forfeit is feeding your rabbit?"
Fluttershy nodded and replied "Uh-huh, he's a fussy eater! Go ahead, provide your evidence!"
Twilight grinned and prepared to detail everything that had led her to the conclusion that Pinkie Pie was a changeling.
"To start with, let's start with the fundamentals of a changeling, their shapeshifting. There have been numerous occasions where Pinkie Pie has hidden her appearance seamlessly but in her delusion that she is a pony, has chalked up her skill to nothing more than mere costumes! I believe the strongest example of this comes from that time in the Crystal Empire, remember? Pinkie Pie rejoined the group perfectly disguised as you, even you saw that! Secondly, the changelings need to feed on love, that one is obvious, Pinkie Pie wants to be friends with everyone and sure you could just say that she is friendly but how does that explain all the times that her appearance changes when she is depressed? Not to mention she actually once sucked the life force out of plants when she was depressed! It also explains why she can eat such ridiculous amounts of food, it's sustenance to keep her going when she isn't being bathed in adoration, why do you think she's so eager to throw so many parties? For love! Thirdly, changelings can fly, right? How many times have we seen Pinkie Pie defy gravity? Remember when we were cleaning up Rarity's boutique in Manehattan and Pinkie was sweeping up using her tail? She was hovering all the while! There you have it Fluttershy! Three big main points of evidence, Pinkie Pie is a changeling!"
Fluttershy considered Twilight's points and said "Well... she is good at disguises, I'll give you that... though we have plenty of evidence to suggest that the costumes were just very good costumes... in the case of her disguised as me... she just took the suit off and left it on the floor so unless she was shedding her skin then I don't think she was shapeshifting. Though... Dashie did say she disguised herself inside a bell during that one birthday. The love consumption thing? Honestly... I can't really fault you on that one. The flying? Again... I can't think of any rebuttal or argument against that... one question though, why wasn't she affected by the love blast during the battle of Canterlot?"
Twilight bit her lip and said "That... is something I don't have the answer to, though I suspect it's because of her status as an element of harmony, you see what I'm getting at though?"
Fluttershy nodded "Yeah Twilight, I gotta admit you're making a lot of sense here, you're conspiracy theory isn't perfect but let's face it, what conspiracy theory is perfect? It's posted!"
"I mean... what I'm saying makes sense right? You get where I'm coming from don't you? It's so obvious! I can't believe I didn't see it before and I can't believe you're skeptical about it!" Twilight proclaimed, she had just dropped a bombshell of a conspiracy theory but Fluttershy was extremely doubtful of the claim, how could Pipsqueak be a dog?
Fluttershy went "Geez, I don't know Twilight, I mean... Pipsqueak being a dog? I know he's a little different but I think it's a bit of a leap to assume he's a dog, don't you think ponies would have noticed that he was a dog by now?"
Twilight rolled her eyes and went "Well DUH! No pony knows that he's a dog! I don't even think that Pipsqueak himself knows that he is a dog!"
Fluttershy nodded and said "OK... but how do you explain the fact that he can talk and looks exactly like a pony?"
Twilight scoffed as she said "Simple! He may seem to be a pony but he doesn't exactly look like one, what pony do you know with colors like that? Besides, diamond dogs can talk!"
Fluttershy, still unsure, stated "Alright, present a case for your conspiracy theory and then I'll point out the flaws, if at the end of it I believe that your argument is even remotely believable... I'll post it anonymously on a conspiracy theory blog, if not... then you'll have to feed Angel"
Twilight raised her eyebrow as she asked "The forfeit is feeding your rabbit?"
Fluttershy nodded and replied "Uh-huh, he's a fussy eater! Go ahead, provide your evidence!"
Twilight grinned and prepared to detail everything that had led her to the conclusion that Pipsqueak was a dog.
"To start with, let's talk about the appearance of a pony, namely our color palette.There are countless examples of ponies having more than one mane color, myself included, though it's rare that we ever have more than one skin color and if we do, the difference is sparse and is often a different shade to our main color, so how does that explain how Pipsqueak has so many patches of brown on his white skin?! There is only one other creature that could have such an interesting color palette and that creature is a dog, just an example, look at Winona. Is it just me, or does she have a similar, if not identical, color palette to Pipsqueak? Winona is clearly not a pony so the only explanation is that Pipsqueak is a dog! Sure he can talk but let's not forget that diamond dogs are perfectly capable of talking and let's face it, there isn't much difference between them and ordinary dogs, it's perfectly reasonable to think that he could learn to talk and maybe learn even more to blend in at school! Secondly, his size, he is way too small for a pony his age! Compare him to the CMC and the difference is clear, he is far too small and yet there is no report of him having stunted growth at all, he is just dog-sized! Like a dog! Thirdly, he came here from Trottingham, right? Well where is his house? Or his parents for that matter? Nowhere to be found, Ponyville wouldn't allow for homeless colts and fillies so where does he live and where is his family? Nowhere... because he is not only a dog, he is a stray dog! He has no home or family because he is a dog! There you have it Fluttershy! Three big main points of evidence, Pipsqueak is a dog!"
Fluttershy considered Twilight's points and said "Well... the color palette idea I'll grant is a very good point, I don't think I've ever seen a pony with more than one skin color and the ones I have seen only have maybe a small patch focused on a single area that's either a darker or lighter shade of the main color... so Pipsqueak's colors are... interesting, especially considering the similarity to Winona. The size? Again, I can't exactly fault you on that, he is too small for his age and even ponies that are younger than him don't look like he does. The home and family? To be honest Twilight... I got nothing, I can't argue with any of the points you've made apart from the talking and being part of pony society... can you explain that?"
Twilight bit her lip and said "That... is something that I can't properly explain, true. Though as I said, if diamonds dog can talk, maybe a stray dog could learn to talk and maybe even more! You see what I'm getting at right?"
Fluttershy nodded "Yeah Twilight, I gotta admit you're making a lot of sense here, you're conspiracy theory isn't perfect but let's face it, what conspiracy theory is perfect? It's posted!"
"I mean... what I'm saying makes sense right? You get where I'm coming from don't you? It's so obvious! I can't believe I didn't see it before and I can't believe you're skeptical about it!" Twilight proclaimed, she had just dropped a bombshell of a conspiracy theory but Fluttershy was extremely doubtful of the claim, how could Sweetie Belle be Rarity's daughter?
Fluttershy went "Geez, I don't know Twilight, I mean... Sweetie Belle being Rarity's daughter? I know they're pretty similar but they're just like any other sisters, don't you think ponies would have known that they were mother and daughter by now?"
Twilight rolled her eyes and went "Well DUH! Rarity doesn't want ponies to know! Having sex and also having a child out of wedlock? It would ruin her image! She's a high class pony!"
Fluttershy nodded and said "OK... but how do you explain her parents then? Did Rarity bring Sweetie Belle home saying she was an orphan and they just adopted her or something?"
Twilight scoffed as she said "Of course not! They must be lying for Rarity's sake but are trying to force Rarity into motherhood! It's the only thing that makes sense!"
Fluttershy, still unsure, stated "Alright, present a case for your conspiracy theory and then I'll point out the flaws, if at the end of it I believe that your argument is even remotely believable... I'll post it anonymously on a conspiracy theory blog, if not... then you'll have to feed Angel"
Twilight raised her eyebrow as she asked "The forfeit is feeding your rabbit?"
Fluttershy nodded and replied "Uh-huh, he's a fussy eater! Go ahead, provide your evidence!"
Twilight grinned and prepared to detail everything that had led her to the conclusion that Sweetie Belle was Rarity's daughter.
"To start with, let's focus on the first thing you mentioned, Rarity's parents. I don't care who you are or what your situation is but most parents do not normally just ditch their own kids to live with their big sister! Good parents don't do that and from what I know, Rarity's parents are very nice ponies, they've no reason to just dump Sweetie Belle onto Rarity and say "take care of your sister, we can't be bothered and we hate her, bye!" While we are on the subject of Rarity's parents, have you noticed that Rarity always speaks really posh while her parents are... let's say not-so-posh when they talk? That doesn't just happen, Rarity has made an effort to distance herself from her parents, why? Probably a theory for another day but it's a strange coincidence that Sweetie Belle takes after Rarity in terms of her voice, not to mention looks! I know siblings can look similar, like Aloe and Lotus or Flim and Flam, though other than those four can you name me any siblings in Equestria that look even remotely similar? Think about your own brother for instance! You could say that it's not a fair comparison because of gender but all you have to do is look at Applejack and Applebloom, they don't look anything alike! I think Rarity's parents forced Rarity to take Sweetie Belle in so she could be a real mother, Sweetie Belle clearly adores Rarity but Rarity often wants nothing to do with her because she knows that if the truth came out it might damage her fancy facade! Also, between you and me, those two have a dynamic that is way more like a mother and daughter than two sisters, wouldn't you agree? It just makes sense, right? There you have it Fluttershy! Three big main points of evidence, Sweetie Belle is Rarity's daughter!"
Fluttershy considered Twilight's points and said "Well... the point you made about her parents is a decent deduction, I don't think I've ever seen pony parents who were so terrible as to foist their own daughter onto their other daughter, so that can't be it. The likeness? Again, I can't exactly fault you on that, they look way too similar to be sisters and to be fair, they don't look similar enough to be twins... also they don't share too many similarities to their "parents" and as for their strange sister dynamic seeming more like a mother/daughter dynamic? To be honest Twilight... I got nothing, I can't argue with any of the points you've made apart from the fact that Rarity has inherited skin color and mane color from her parents while Sweetie Belle only inherited skin color which she could have easily got from Rarity assuming your theory is correct... though on that point, if Rarity is Sweetie Belle's mom... then who is the dad?"
Twilight bit her lip and said "That... is something that I don't have the answer to unfortunately, though everything else lines up doesn't it? I'd say my strongest evidence is eye color! Rarity's parents both have blue eyes, Rarity has blue eyes but Sweetie Belle miraculously has green eyes? Highly suspicious! There is a green-eyed stallion out there who's a dad and probably doesn't even know it!"
Fluttershy nodded "Yeah Twilight, I gotta admit you're making a lot of sense here, you're conspiracy theory isn't perfect but let's face it, what conspiracy theory is perfect? It's posted!"
Plenty of ponies discussed Twilight's conspiracy theories on the blog, though the ponies that happened to be the subject of the theories never caught wind of them and ponies were smart enough to know to not go snooping about in their business, so the theories were never truly confirmed. Were the theories believed? It was a mixed response, Twilight wasn't perfect in the art of establishing believable facts to back up her wild theories but that never mattered to her, she didn't really buy into conspiracy theories, she just thought they were fun, kind of like horoscopes or when she visited "Madame Pinkie" for a reading, harmless fun!
Some ponies believed the theories and some didn't, none of them ever bothered to search for more evidence because they either didn't need more than what was provided to believe in it and the ones who didn't believe considered the theory so ludicrous that it was pointless to try and dredge anything up just so that either team could say "I told you so" and declare victory. Pinkie Pie may or may not have been a changeling, Pipsqueak may or may not have been a dog, Sweetie Belle may or may not be Rarity's daughter, though whatever the case was, the simple fact of the matter is that Twilight often liked to take a break from cold, hard, concrete information and just kick back and relax with Fluttershy for pointless debates that, in the grand scheme of things, didn't really matter.
If her theories were correct, would it make a difference? Probably, who knows? So long as the theories remained conspiracy theories and nothing more, then it didn't matter, it was a waste of time to try and solve something that was all just baseless speculation and guesses. Anyway, they were all just theories, conspiracy theories!
