A burning fire as big as a house, grown colts crying in the streets and weirdo barkeeps that laugh at you when you walk inside. What kind of town is this? And why is this unicorn looking at me like he’s never seen a strong, dazzling mare before? Well, I guess I do have that effect on Colts, not everyone can be blessed with my gorgeous coat and mane. Although now that I’m feeling it, it could probably use a stroke or two just to straighten up a bit. Eh, it can wait. What I really need is food. I’ll just take a seat at the other end of the bar. No need to make a scene with my presence.
What is this guy’s deal? He’s been staring at me ever since I walked in. I mean, I know I look great but come on! Have a little subtlety. Geez, I can feel his stare on the side of my face...Should I look? Or would that be weird? But he’s already being weird! Maybe just a peek.
Sweet Celestia what was that face! Furrowed brows, open mouth and why was he leaning back? It looked like he just saw someone wipe peanut butter in their pits and then eat it. Wait, what is there something on my back or something? I must have been too tired to notice! Just stay calm Trixie, just wipe it off and you’ll be fine. Easy does....there’s nothing there. Then what is he...Oh, the barkeep is coming this way. At least he isn’t making a face…
He’s just standing there... Did I do something to make these ponies mad at me? Should I order? Should I leave? But where else am I supposed to get something to eat? Snap out of it Trixie, You’ve done nothing wrong and there is no reason these ponies should be upset at you! The colt across the bar is probably the town weirdo and it is kind of late so maybe the barkeep is just tired. Worry about yourself first.
“Do you serve food here?”
“Yeh.”
“Oh.” I don’t think he’s gonna follow up with anything.
“...”
“Could I have a…” I can’t read this guy's face and there’s no menu on the wall. Just a bunch of alcohol. “Daisy…sandwich...please?”
He’s not saying anything. He’s just walking through some doors over by the weirdo. I hope that’s the kitchen. I don’t know how long I can take this stomach ache for. My head is starting to hurt too. I’ll have to get some water before it gets really bad. Maybe I’ll just rest my head a bit. I’ll just use my hat as a pillow until the food gets here. Ahhh, this is nice. I haven’t felt this good all day, even with that other pony at the other side of the bar. I wonder if he’s still looking at me? Maybe just a quick peek…
Oh my gosh, he still has that face! Has he moved at all since I sat down? Doesn’t he know it’s rude to stare at somepony for so long! He must be some kind of lunatic. What if he was waiting for someone like me to wander into town? Is he gonna try to do something? Nopony would be able to find me in these mountains if I go missing. Where would they even start? Who would even look? Does the barkeep know? Is he in on it too? This is bad, I should leave.
Oh No! The barkeep just came out! And he’s got a...sandwich… Heh heh, I’ve been hungry for way too long. I’m letting things get to me. I’ll be fine once I’ve eaten. Mmmm, that sandwich looks pretty good right now. Can’t wait to...Now he’s just standing still in front of me. Am I missing something here. Is he gonna perform or something.
“Can I help y-”
“Bits.”
“Oh, right.” I don’t have much left, but food’s food. “How much?
“Two.”
It’s a little cheaper than I thought it was going to be so that’s pretty good I guess. Back in Las Pegasus they went for about- Where’s my pouch? Where is it!? Oh no. Oh no oh no oh no oh no. Where could it have...the river! It could be anywhere by now. What am I supposed to do? Calm down, just explain the situation and maybe he’ll understand. Yeah, we can all be reasonable adults about this.
“I seem to hav-” HE’S WALKING AWAY! No please! Don’t walk back in there. Sweet Celestia please no… I can’t yell. I don’t have the strength for it. This is it, isn’t it? Hide your face Trixie and stop your sniveling. Don’t let that weirdo see you like this. Oh, who cares. I’m stuck up here with no money, no food, no shelter...Out of all the ways to go who would have thought it would be starvation. The Great and Powerful Trixie! She died because she couldn’t eat! What an Idiot! I should have just stayed home. What was I thinking!? Was I just going to set out and find my big break just like that!? Of course not. Nobody knows who I am. I would have ended up in this same situation, but maybe those extra couple of weeks would have been nice. No point in thinking about it now; it’ll just bum me out. Looks like its sleep for dinner again...
***
Aaaaah! What was that noise? It sounded like...What’s this? A daisy sandwich! And oats! And Milk! But I didn’t pay for it. Who...was it that weirdo? He’s gone. The barkeeps still here though.
“Hey… Is this mine?”
“Yep.”
“How.”
“Bits.”
“I know but, how? Who paid for it.”
“Colt.”
“The one who was sitting there.”
“Yep.”
“Did he leave?”
He just pointed toward the staircase over by where the colt was sitting. There must be some rooms upstairs to sleep in. Maybe I’ll thank him before I head out. But first, Mmmmmm. Where to begin? The sandwich of course! So light, and yet so refreshing. It feels like the petals are dancing on my tongue! And these oats! Mmmmm, crunchy with hints of sugar and cinnamon! I don’t know how I would have made it without this. Now to drown it. Ooooh, The milk’s warm, like a puppy’s belly. Really hits the spot when it’s this cold out. Come to think of it I need to find a place to stay for the night. It’d be suicide trying to travel in this weather.
“Hey, how many rooms did this guy rent out.”
“One.”
I guess it was a stretch. Why would somepony pay for somepony else’s room? We didn’t even speak while he was down here. Maybe I can try and earn a place to sleep for the night by washing dishes or sweeping the floor or something. I appreciate the food but I’m not a charity case.
“Hey barkeep, do you need a hand with any-What’s this?” He just handed me an envelope. It’s not full enough to be money. It feels like a small piece of metal.
“Key.”
“For what?”
“Room.”
No way! A free room! Who needs work when you have this kind of effect on ponies. That colt must have been able to see just how amazing I was. I mean, that would explain all the staring. Oh, Trixie, you should really work on trying to control your powers for good. There’s only so much the world can give you.
“Thank you, good sir! Know that you have helped the Great and Powerful Trixie on her quest to stardom!”
“Hah.”
There are only two rooms up here. Mines two o’ one so he must be staying in two o’ two. He’s probably already asleep so I’ll just try and catch him in the morning. It’s been a long day and I’d rather just settle into a nice warm bed. That’s weird... what’s the point of the key if the door is unloc-
“Ahhhh, so you are a mare of the night!”
What.
“Are you just going to stand there or do I have to get myself going first?”
Is he talking abou-
“Well if you insist.”
“Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah!” Sweet Celestia he’s naked! Just keep your eyes covered Trixie, you don’t need to deal with this! This is a bad dream! Yep, still dreaming. You’re so hungry that it's starting to affect your dreams too. That’s it, yep! Can’t be anything else!
“Well, I think screaming is a bit rude-”
“WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN MY ROOM!”
“Your room?”
“Yes, my room! I have the key!”
“Well yes, you have the key bu-”
“Then get out!”
“But! This is my room.”
“What are you talking about!”
“Did the barkeeper not fill you in or something?”
“Just get out!”
“I told him that, if you were one of those promiscuous mares of the night that I hear stories about, he should send you my way for a post-meal workout!”
“WHAT!” I can’t believe this is happening. He’s a pig! And he expects me to- “Oh my gosh, What makes you think that I am even that kind of mare!”
“Well, when you walked into the bar- you can let go of your face now-”
“I will not! Not until you put something on!”
“Geez, ok. Let me just uh… there. Good enough.” All he did was wrap the blanket around his waist. “Is this fine?”
“Fine.” It’s not fine. None of this is fine. I just wanted to get some sleep.
“So, like I was saying, when you walked into the bar you looked, how do I put this...Absolutely horrendous.”
“Well now you’re a pig and rude.”
“That first one’s debatable, but your hair was disheveled, you had some weird stains on your clothes, and speaking of clothes who brings a wizard hat with them if its not some kind of weird thing to get them going, you know?”
“I’ve been stuck in the woods all day so excuse me if I’m not exactly stage ready right now!” Great now I have to get some clothes while I’m here too. “And shut up about the hat!”
“Hey, I’m not judging--except your looks--to each their own.”
“Is this how you treat every mare that you trick into your room?”
“Tricks! I have yet to trick anyone, I merely offer them the opportunity of some after-hours magic if you understand what I’m saying.”
“Uh-huh, and how’s that working out for you?”
“To be honest, it’s never worked.”
Damn right it’s never worked. As if someone’s just going to play into your pathetic game like that. This guy is a weirdo. I mean who does that kind of thing anyway? “So are you going to get out or am I going to have to get the barkeep to throw you out?”
“Well, if you were paying attention--clearly you weren’t,”
“I’m sorry If I’m deciding to omit a few details!”
“This is my room. I’ve paid for it, I’ve signed the register.” True. “Now, there are no other rooms left-”
“-then who’s room is that next door?”
“The barkeeper’s. Anyway, seeing as there are no other rooms and seeing as the lobby is not exactly well insulated on this frigid evening--and as an ‘apology’ for my assumptions--you are more than welcome to stay in here for the night.” That grin on his face. Ick! Who knows what’s going on in that twisted brain of his.
“Uh-huh, What’s the catch.”
“Oh well that’s simple really, I get to sleep in the bed.”
“No wa-”
“Now should somepony also want to rest their cold weary head in that same bed-
“Just shut u-”
“-I would not object. In fact, I would welcome it. So long as said pony understands that I come from a proud family of cuddlers and I am second to none save for my dear little brother.”
Is he really still talking about this.
“All other parties are free to partition the floor, for what cruel monster would force those seeking shelter out into an uninsulated tavern or, Luna forbid, the freezing mountain air.”
“I’m gonna wipe that dumb grin off your face.” But... he’s right though, I don’t exactly have anything to keep me warm. The tavern is not cold enough to kill you but I’d be too sick to travel in the morning. I guess the floor wouldn’t be so bad. Gosh, could this get any worse?
“I’ve decided to make an addendum, should all parties not decide soon they will be kicked to secure the restful sleep of the leasee. No guilt will be applicable to said leasee.”
“I’m weighing my options! Give me a sec!”
“Five.”
“Hey!”
“Four.”
“Would you jus-”
“Three.”
“Oooooooh.”
“Two.”
“Fine! Shut up! I’ll take the floor.”
“Wonderful!”
“But I get the pillows and blankets.”
“You will get a blanket and nothing more. Pillows don’t belong on the floor.”
“Fine! Just give me the blanket.”
“I’m glad all parties have been able to reach an amicable conclusion. You have a good night Ms…”
“Trixie.” He doesn’t deserve my full title.
“Ms. Trixie. Sleep well knowing you are under my charge for the evening. Oh. Knight is my name. Arcane Knight, knight only in name.”
“Fitting.” Knight. Hah! Don’t make me laugh. I doubt he’s even called that ironically. Forget it. In the morning he won’t be your problem anymore. Just get some sleep and deal with tomorrow when it comes. You’ll get out of this mess. You always do.