Inquisitorial Report - Ponies (Protectorate USA Assorted Units)
Name: Ponies (also; Equus ferus sapiens, Unicorns/Pegasi/Alicorns)
Formation Type: Infantry (Usually)
Numbers: Unknown
Introduction: The Ponies are a species of blasphemously adorable-looking xenos that serve a wide variety of roles among the heretical forces of the Cainite Protectorate. They are so named because of their bizarre, as-of-yet unexplained resemblance to Terran Miniature horses.
Initially encountered by Imperial forces during [REDACTED], they are believed to originate from Centaur III, and were previously encountered amongst the ranks of the Iron Warriors 38th Company prior to the little-known Chaos Warband being assimilated into the USA (see; Centaur III report). Wildly varying numbers of these creatures nave been seen amongst Protectorate forces on numerous battlefields, ranging from singular individuals to entire detachments of the creatures.
This xeno race appears to be split into four subraces: one with wings (Pegasi), one with a horn (Unicorns), one with neither (Earth Ponies), and one with both (Alicorns). Earth Ponies are arguably the least dangerous, though only due to relative simplicity compared to other units; they are possessed of immense strength that well outstrips their body size, and a singular Earth Pony has on occasion downed an incautious Astartes with a single strike of their hoof. Next up on the threat level are Pegasi, who lack the strength of their ground-bound kin but compensate by wings that grant them flight, allowing them to fly in-atmosphere with speed and agility on par with, and sometimes superior to, an Imperial jetbike. Above them are unicorns, which lack both enhanced strength and flight but possess powerful psychic capacity, on top of near-total immunity to the usual perils of the Warp associated with such abilities. And then there are alicorns, exceedingly rare combatants that combine the talents of all three aforementioned subraces to often-lethal effect.
Combat Doctrine: As stated above, Ponies serve a truly surprising variety of roles among the USA, though they often take to the field as standard infantry. The roles they can serve on the field are as varied as human troops, if not more so, but they tend to lean more towards melee combat, as their quadruped bodies make human-made ranged weaponry somewhat awkward to use, despite the BORG Hereteks' attempts to rectify this with their unique brand of techno-heresy (see Wargear below).
Despite this leaning toward close-quarters-combat, pony forces tend to fight more defensively than other USA units, taking maximum possible advantage of defensive positions and doing their level best to minimize losses and casualties. Some among the Ordos might be inclined to attribute this to cowardice, but do not be fooled; they can be as aggressive and lethal as any other Protectorate soldier if the situation calls for it.
It is also worth noting that pony forces will occasionally try to negotiate with Imperial Forces, attempting to impress the value of "friendship" and "compromise" upon our loyal soldiers and sway them to the Protectorate's side, in a textbook example of the Threat of Discord in action. These attempts always end in failure, and anyone who tries to claim otherwise is a traitorous heretic attempting to spread blasphemous misinformation. Such traitors are to be detained and executed at the earliest opportunity.
Wargear: Most Pony units arrive on the field of battle with wargear similar to rank and file USA soldiers, outfitted with power armor fitted to accommodate their quadruped bodies and outfitted with servo-harnesses that let them pick up and use human weaponry. Their wargear, however, tends to vary more than that of USA troops, and is often customized by the owner. The wargear they carry is also supplemented by their formidable natural abilities. Certain Elite pony units have also been outfitted with warp-touched artifacts presumably of their own design. This makes them far more unpredictable on the field than most USA troops, and harder to counter as a result.
Addendum 1: Pony forces have repeatedly been witnessed referencing "Harmony". This is believed to be some kind of cosmic force worshipped by the creatures as a diety. The nature and status of this force are unknown at the moment.
Addendum 2: On occasion, Ponies have been seen performing impromptu mass musical numbers, sometimes in the middle of battle and without impairing their effectiveness on the field, all while appearing to be perfectly choreographed beforehand despite the fact that such a thing is straight-up impossible. How this can be is unknown for now.
Addendum 3: As of this writing, we have yet to successfully kill even one of these creatures. While it is far from impossible to incapacitate them and their biology even makes death a very real possibility on paper (unlike necrons), in practice no servant of the Emperor has managed to inflict a mortal wound on a pony, and the few we've managed to capture have, without exception, been rescued long before we were able to execute or vivisect any of them. An Inquisitor once described this effect as if "we're in a badly-written anti-imperial propaganda piece and those things have Titan-grade plot armor". This is a surprisingly apt description of this effect's mechanics; how such a thing is possible is, again, unknown.