//------------------------------// // Being a Real Estate Agent // Story: Twilight Tries... // by Peni Parker //------------------------------// Hi, everypony, and welcome to another episode of Twilight Tries! The thing I’ll be trying in today’s episode is something that I’ve actually been planning on trying for a few months now but wasn’t able to do right away because of, shall we say…a lot of red tape. It’s something that required 40 hours of training and passage of a licensing test for me to do legally, and it’s something that’s much more complicated than I think most ponies realize. But it’s something that I feel will have been worth all of the time and effort that I’ve put into getting to this point. And not just because I got a neat-looking license for it. Today, I’m going to try…being a real estate agent! Now you may be wondering why it is I decided to try being a real estate agent, especially if I had to go through so much just to become certified. Well, the answer to that query is simply because I feel that it’s another way I can help other ponies. ‘Cause let’s be honest, real estate is a pretty tricky business for most of us, and a real estate agent can play a big part in helping us navigate it. And I can attest to that based off of my own personal experience. After I decided to leave home and get my first place back in Canterlot the real estate agent I hired really helped make the whole homebuying process more bearable. Although she was rather pushy about me staying in the Crescent Park area of Canterlot. But anywhoo, that’s why I’m trying this today and I couldn’t be happier. Because as it turns out one of my friends from Canterlot is looking to move to Ponyville and asked if I knew any real estate agents that could show her a few places. And having just gotten my real estate license a couple of days ago you can probably guess who it was I mentioned. . . No, not Jade Flagg, Starlight! It was me, I told her I could show her some places around town! And if you don’t mind, I’m trying to film an episode for my vlog right now. So can you please take your fog machine and your glowing…sea urchin thing somewhere else? . . Thank you. I’m not even going to ask what she’s doing with that stuff. Anyways, my friend should be here any minute now. But while we’re waiting for her I just want to say a quick thank you to Vantagg Realty Group for taking me on per diem so that I could do this. Without their resources it probably would have taken me all last weekend to put together my list of potential houses instead of only an hour. Well, technically an hour and fifteen minutes but that’s because I stopped halfway through to make myself some sulaimani tea. Mmm, sulaimani tea. . Oh, great. Now I’m craving some sulaimani tea. Oh, one more thing I wanted to mention: any bits I happen to make while being a real estate agent will be donated to the Equestrian Foundation for Animal Rescue and Rehabilitation – or EFARR -, a 501(c)(3) nonprofit that’s dedicated to the care and healing of animals that have suffered serious injuries. I’m in a good enough financial place right now that I don’t really need those bits, and from what my friend Fluttershy has told me the EFARR could really use some more donations. At least I think that was the EFARR she was talking about. She might have been talking about the Equestrian Foundation for Animal Rights and Respect instead. . Oh, my friend is here. Hi, Moon Dancer! So good to see you! . . Yep, I’m all set to show you some potential houses here in Ponyville. I’ve got my files, my red blazer, and a hoofful of bits for lunch. So if you’re ready to get going right now I am too. . . Why do I have a red blazer? Um, because I’m a real estate agent. Aren’t red blazers standard attire for real estate agents? . . Oh. Well I think I’ll still wear it anyways. I think I really pull it off. Plus Rarity went through all the trouble to custom-make it for me so I’d hate to not wear it. But enough about my blazer, let’s go look at some houses! Okay, so this is the first house on my list. It’s a 1200 square foot single-family home with two bedrooms, one-and-a-half bathrooms, a basement, and a kitchen that was remodeled three years ago. Shall we take a look inside? . . Okay then. Let me just get the key real quick. . Aaand…open sesame! Heh heh. Why did I just say that? . . . So, what do you think, Moon Dancer? . . Yeah, I thought that too; the remodeled kitchen does appear pretty dated already, doesn’t it? . . And some of the rooms do feel a bit cramped as well, yes. The second bedroom seems more like a walk-in closet. Well, that’s alright. There are plenty of other houses in Ponyville that we can look at, most of which I’m fairly certain are larger than this one. So let’s move on. All right, this house is a 2150 square foot single-family home with three bedrooms, two bathrooms, a basement, and a backyard deck that was just put in last year. . . . Any thoughts, Moon Dancer? . . This place feels cramped too? Um, okay then. Well we can certainly look at a few larger houses if you want. But as your real estate agent I feel that I should tell you that the asking price for this one is already pretty close to the top of the budget you gave me, so any place that’s larger than this will most likely be too expensive. . . All right, if you insist. There’s a larger house not too far from here that we can look at, so I guess that we’ll head over there next. . . . You know, I hadn’t really figured on how much walking would be involved in this. My hooves are kind of starting to ache here. . . Sorry, what was that, Moon Dancer? . . Oh, that billboard up there with my picture on it? Yeah, it’s a bit of a strange story. See, when I signed-on per diem with Vantagg Realty Group they asked if they could use my image for some marketing material. So I said that would be fine and then they rushed me over to a photoshoot where they took a lot of pictures of me in a very short amount of time. I swear, it felt like it ended just as quickly as it had started. They ended up using some of those photos for things like pamphlets and flyers, but I had no idea that they’d use one for a billboard. Not that I’m complaining about that, I’m actually kind of flattered by the whole thing. Although I do wish that they’d chosen a different photo to go with. I feel like that one makes my flank look a little big. And by ‘a little’ I mean ‘very’. . *CAMERA SHUTTER* Huh? Uh, Moon Dancer? Did you by chance just take a picture of my billboard? . . No? Well, all right then. I could’ve sworn I just heard a camera shutter go off. . Oh, here we are. So, this house is 4200 square feet with five bedrooms, three-and-a-half bathrooms, a basement, and features very spacious living and dining rooms for hosting parties as well as a cocktail pool in the backyard. Whatever a cocktail pool is. And I should also probably mention that the asking price that’s listed for this house is higher than the amount of bits you said you have within your budget. And I mean significantly more. . . . Well? . . *SIGH* Still too cramped, huh? Well then I’m sorry, Moon Dancer, but I don’t think you’re going to find a house in Ponyville that’s right for you. There are only two other homes in this town that are larger than this one and neither of them is for sale; Filthy Rich’s mansion and my castle. . . Oh, I don’t know. I’d say Filthy Rich’s mansion is probably somewhere around 8000 square feet and my castle is somewhere around 17000 square feet. Why do you ask? . . W-What? Um, M-Moon Dancer. I’m glad that you like my castle so much, but there really aren’t any rooms available for rent in it. . . Well, no, it’s not that there aren’t rooms available in the physical sense, it’s just that I’m not renting any of them out to anypony. . . I mean, yes, Starlight lives in the castle. But she’s my student – err, was my student – and the circumstances under which she came to live in the castle were somewhat…complicated. . . *SOFT SOBBING* Are...are you serious, Moon Dancer? T-The reason you wanted to move to P-Ponyville is because you wanted to become my s-student too? . . *HEAVY SOBBING AND HUGGING NOISES* Oh, M-Moon Dancer! Of course I’ll take you on as my student! And you can live with us in the castle as long as you like! *SNIFFLE* . . S-Sorry, sorry. I got a little too emotional there. But I’m just so happy and excited that that’s why you wanted to move to Ponyville. How about we head back to the castle now and have some sulaimani tea to celebrate our new teacher-student relationship? . . Sounds good. Why don’t you start heading over there now and I’ll catch up to you in a bit. I just want to wrap-up my vlog real quick. . Well, everypony, this episode certainly didn’t go like I’d expected it would, but I have to say it certainly was interesting. And not just with how things ended with Moon Dancer just now either. It was also interesting to see all of the different kinds of houses that are here in Ponyville. I mean I’ve lived in Ponyville for some time now and I pass by a number of these houses practically every day but I’ve never really taken the opportunity to actually notice most of them before today. And yes, a big part of that was because I got to tour some of them, but I feel like after today I’m going to be more observant and have a greater appreciation for all of the unique and pulchritudinous houses in this town. And probably in other towns too. As for being a real estate agent I think I’m going to stick with it, though only whenever it’s a close friend who needs help finding a place. I mean, what with being a princess, a school principal, and president of my book club I don’t think there’s any way I could do this on a full-time or even part-time basis. So as always, thanks for watching, and I’ll see you next time on Twilight Tries! . Shoot. I probably should’ve consulted with Starlight and Spike before saying that Moon Dancer could move into the castle. Eh, I’m sure they’ll both be okay with it. After all, this is Moon Dancer we’re talking about. I’m sure having her around won’t be any trouble at all.