Brusque & Brooding
Letting It Out
So it went without incident for some time at the Koopa Keep. On one particularly average day, nearly one week since his arrival, Sombra stood out on his suite’s balcony, looking over the barren wastes beyond while reflecting back on his time under Bowser’s roof. For the past two days the koopa king hadn’t dragged him along for any planned activities, or meals for that matter. At first it was a welcome break, but in a castle that wasn’t being demolished or experiencing some form of zaniness, things got dull pretty quickly. Originally, Sombra considered quiet solitude his ideal form of relaxation, but to his dismay he felt more restless than relaxed as of late.
Giving the empty plains a last look, he turned back into his suite and out into the hall in search of something more interesting. The castle staff had stopped escorting him a few days ago, giving him free reign to do as he pleased. A fatal oversight to anyone who cared the slightest for their castle’s security, yet for the past week Sombra had no mind for sabotage, or anything heinous for that matter. It upset him slightly when he thought to how fine he was with lounging about his enemy’s castle while his own was being rebuilt, but only slightly.
With no idea whatsoever for something engaging, Sombra headed for the throne room, thinking his awfully generous host would have some ideas. Perhaps even see why he hasn’t been pestering him these two days. Upon reaching the doors of the throne room, Sombra whipped up some magic to push them inward, and just as he was about to announce his presence an unsettling sight stop him in his tracks: Bowser was sitting atop his throne, and... playing with dolls?
“‘Oh no, it’s the ever terrifying and studly Bowser come to kidnap me again. Such an incredible devil of daring he is!’” He spoke in a high-pitch voice while dangling around a doll that looked like Peach. “Bwahahaha! Yes princess, I have come for you once again, only don’t bother counting on the Mario Brothers to bail you out. ‘Oh woe is me, I’m so useless and nothing more than a pretty face, I am completely powerless before your gruff charms.’”
“Ermmm, what is going on?”
“Bwuuh!” Bowser cried as he shoved the dolls and his claws behind his back. “W-What do you want; don’t you know how to knock?!”
“I wasn’t aware you were... busy,” Sombra replied with as straight a face as he could manage. “I was merely looking for a means to pass the time, as you haven’t come to bother me as of late.”
“W-Well I don’t recall telling you to barge in whenever you want, especially when I’m in the middle of, uh, private matters!” Bowser said with a reddening face.
“There wasn’t a sign on the door saying such, if these indeed were private matters. And also, did I actually see you playing with dolls just now?”
“Uhh uhh... yeah.” Bowser looked down, scratching the ground with his toe. “It’s just, something I do every once in awhile. Not all the time, just to unwind a bit. Nothing wrong with that, nuh-uh.”
“Considering how child-minded you are, it doesn’t surprise me in the least,” Sombra remarked as he turned around. “Since you’re preoccupied, I’ll go elsewhere.”
Just as Sombra stepped through the door,
“Wait!” Bowser’s outcry stopped the stallion, who turned back around. “Uh, if you’re looking for something to do, then maybe you’d like to stick around and play some?”
Sombra stiffened with an eye twitch. “Did you just seriously ask me that?”
“There’s no harm in it, and it’s supposed to be all therapeutic and junk. Besides, it’s not as weird if two people do it, right?”
A small yet loud part of Sombra’s psyche was screaming at him to get out of their as fast as his hooves could carry him, but a mixture of curiosity, boredom, and the sound of sincerity in Bowser’s request silenced it. With a deep breath he trotted across the length of the throne room and stopped short of the overgrown lizard manchild.
“Since there’s nothing else to do, I may spare a few minutes.”
“Awesome!” Bowser said delightedly as he withdrew the two dolls from before, as well as a few extras. “Here, you can be Mario, and I can be me.” Sombra telekinetically took the proffered figurine, flipping it over to inspect the wear and rugged textures. Clearly a toy that’s been around for a while... or played with more frequency than “once in awhile.”
“So you ready? I’ll lead.” Bowser held up the dolls of Peach and himself, alternating voices. “Ahahaha, you’re mine, my sweet little Peach! Hand over your kingdom and I’ll go easy on ya. ‘Oh yeah? Well no matter how smooth an operator you are, my pudgy hero Mario is here to save the day again!’ Is that so? Well I’m not afraid of him. Do your worst, foul loser plumber!” A pause followed. “Hey, it’s your turn.”
“Huh? Oh, yes, um...” Sombra waved the Mario doll around. “I’ve come to stop you, odious reptile—”
“No no no, you gotta be in character,” Bowser interrupted. “Mario doesn’t use words like that, and you didn’t even try sounding like him. Put some effort into it.”
Sombra looked at the Mario doll vexingly, then gave it another go. “Um... ‘It’s a-me, Mario’?”
“Wahaha! My eternal counterpart, I knew you would come,” Bowser resumed. “You might be cocky and sure of yourself from the number of times you’ve beaten me, but I assure you, things won’t happen like they usually— Hey what's that? Ha! Fooled you! Now you have a hammer to the back, and some Fire! Bwaaaaaaaa! Taste my wrath! Chzzz Chzzz. Yes! You have been defeated! I alone remain victorious, forever, until the end of time. And the crowd goes wild for Bowser! ‘Aaaaah! Aaaaaaah!’”
Sombra gave his hardest deadpan before saying, “...I’m done.” He whipped his mane as he turned to leave, but Bowser got to his feet and reached out to him.
“Wait hold on, why are you quitting now?”
“The whole thing’s absurd,” Sombra stated. “Aside from the fact two adults are playing with dolls—one being far more invested than the other—what fun is there if you’re going to defeat me when I barely have a say? That’s just bad role-playing.”
“Okay, yeah, I see your point. Didn’t take you into consideration. Heh, my bad.” Sombra still didn’t look amused. “Alright, I have a quick fix. Instead of Mario, you can be you.” Bowser reached behind himself and held out another doll, this one shaped like a pony and crudely painted black with a piece of red fabric affixed to its back. Sombra pulled the toy over to him and looked at it curiously.
“...I take it this is me?” he asked, though he already knew the answer.
“Yeah, I recently added it to the collection,” Bowser said unabashedly. “Sorry for it looking so cruddy. I couldn’t find one that had your color, so I had to paint it myself. Bit of a rush job, I know.”
“You had the time to give me an unflattering face and cross-eyes.”
“I mostly just stomp on it a bunch, so I wanted to capture the feel. But now ‘you’ get to be in the spotlight for once! So let’s take it from the top again.” Bowser held up his Peach and personal doll for another performance. “‘Oh no, what is that evil looming darkness that sweeps in like a terrible nightmare storm? I’ve never seen something so evil, except for you, Bowser!’ Bwahahaha, that’s Sombra come to back me up in taking down your pretty, innocent domain. “Oh, extra woes be to me and my prissy rulership!’” Bowser looked to Sombra and his dolls. “You’re not even worth being stepped on by me, Mario. Now you’re gonna get trashed by four hooves of misery at the behest of my cool, flowy-haired partner! Okay, now toss that impudent plumber to the ground.”
Sombra stared at Bowser a moment.
“Go on, that’s your cue!” Bowser whispered, and with a roll of the eyes Sombra lifted up the Mario doll and tossed it to the ground. “Yea-Heeh! Not so tough now, are ya? Now stomp him into the dirt! Don’t give him a chance to breathe!” Sombra shrugged and lifted a hoof. “No no no, use your other you.”
“Why?”
“Cuz it’s more realistic.” Bemused by that statement, Sombra brought down his own doll and banged it on the Mario doll repeatedly, while Bowser stood with glee. “Yeah, taste it, Taste It! That’s four instead of two feet hitting ya, double the pain! Stupid mustache not so high and mighty now, huh? No stop in sight on the pain train for you, loser! Bwahahaha!” Bowser brought out the Peach doll. “‘Oh, please stop it, you rugged stallion of a savage! He doesn’t have nearly enough fat to survive such a beating!’ There’s no use beggin, Peachy. That’s one stone-cold heartless horse, and ain’t no one gonna stand up to him for long, especially some overweight Italian! Look at him go; talk about a beast! Wahahaha!”
The act was rather amusing to Sombra at first, but Bowser’s commentary put a damper on his mood as something began to rise in his thoughts: something that had been bothering him since his second day at the castle, and which grew more vexing as time went by. With his host’s rapt attention on him, he figured now was as good a time as any to bring it up. Sombra stopped battering the big-nosed toy and stood silent a moment before facing Bowser.
“...Why are you doing this?” he asked.
“Cuz imagination is fun!” Bowser plopped himself back on the throne to fiddle with his dolls some more. “Why is it only alright for kids to do it without getting weird looks, the dumb pampered little snots.”
“No, I meant, why are you doing these things for me?”
“...What things?”
“Fine living accommodations, lavish meals, making the effort to entertain me, your very subjects waiting on hand and knee for me, sharing your...” Waved around his doll. “‘Private’ affairs, offering me shelter instead of leaving me out to the wilds. Why are you doing these things? I thought you despised me with a fiery passion.”
“Yeah, I did. At least, I used to, until we had that rumble from the other week. Then you didn’t seem so bad afterwards.”
A shot of surprise flickered through Sombra’s gaze, but he retained his cool. “Explain.”
“I had said real villains settle their differences with their fists. When I got the chance to finally wail on ya, I saw the kind of guy you really were, and it wasn’t too shabby,” Bowser exposited while still shaking around his dolls. “You get annoying by talking big and acting stuck-up, but that night I found that you could back those big words up. And I have to admit, there was a lot of stress going on at the time that may have clouded my judgment that I needed to vent, and luckily you were just the right punching bag for the job, huh huh.”
The stallion still wasn’t sure he had heard all of that correctly. “Then, what about my kidnapping of the princess, and destroying your invasion?”
“Water under the bridge. The Peach thing was a pretty jerk move though, but I got to bust you up pretty good for it. And the whole, you know, destroying your home deal. So bygones be bygones and what have ya. Up for another bit of kingdom conquering?”
Bowser held out his dolls eagerly, but Sombra’s mind had inexplicably blanked momentarily. But before the silence persisted too long, Sombra huffed and put his miniature softly on the ground. “I think I’ll retire for now, until dinner.”
“You sure?” Bowser said, a little disappointed.
“Yes. But this had been... interesting, to say the least.” Sombra began to trot to the throne room doors.
“Heh, you see? Nothing to be ashamed of! Well you rest up, my guest. Oh, and keep the door closed when you leave, will ya? ‘K thanks!”
The stallion remained stoic as he magically sealed the doors behind him, leaving Bowser to gleefully harass his patchwork captive.
Sleep didn’t come to Sombra later that night. Despite a hearty potato and gravy dinner, he was as wide awake as could be. He had even taken off his armor to better relax, but a cool breeze from the balcony over his bare coat wouldn’t soothe his thoughts. What had been said in the throne room kept whirling around his head, and it was frustratingly irksome to say the least.
Finding no respite in the darkness of his room, Sombra decided a nighttime stroll was in order. Putting on his cape before leaving his room oh so quietly, he walked the empty, dimly lit halls of the upper floor, his hoof falls reverberating as though to announce his solitude to anyone who listened. He wandered directionless down hall after hall for a time deep in thought, never once running into anyone.
His aimless reverie ended when a spot of light caught his attention. Streaked across the hall floor was a swath of orange that came from a door, slightly cracked. Curious, he headed for the door and peeked through the crack. Inside appeared to be study of some kind, with a nice-sized fireplace (the source of the orange glow), an animal-skin rug (probably Fido), and some bookshelves (though really they were more for decoration). Across from the fire sat Bowser in a comfy, throne-shaped easy chair, swirling a glass of a dark liquid before taking a large sip.
“Ahhh, Chuckle Cola,” he sighed in content. “Such rich, bubbly flavor. Expensive as crazy, but totally worth it.” Bowser took another gulp before resigning to silence once more. Sombra lifted a hoof, and bringing it to the door, tapped it three times. The courteous rapping brought Bowser’s attention to the door, just as Sombra poked his head through.
“Oh, heyo, Sombra,” Bowser hailed from his seat.
“Mind if I come in?” Sombra asked in a soft tone.
“Sure thing!” Bowser waved the stallion in, who obliged. “So what brings you by? Shouldn’t you be asleep?”
“Sleep eludes me. I thought I could walk about instead. Yourself?”
“Eh, I sometimes get in the mood for staying up and chilling here in the study. I had it installed for kicks, so why not make use of it?” Bowser downed the rest of his import cola. “I see you’re not wearing that armor of yours.”
“It proved to be a mite stuffy tonight. I hope it doesn’t offend you.”
“No qualms from me. Hey, the most I’ve ever worn was a tux. Other than that, it’s the full monty! Bwahahaha!”
The stallion just gave him a look. “Classy as always.”
Bowser ignored the remark completely as he looked to his guest. “Hmph, well it may interest you to know that I got a report from the construction site. Your brand-spanking new castle will be done in just a few days. That means you won’t be mooching offa me for long, heheh.”
“Yes, what a tremendous relief that will be for you, and what ecstatic joy it will be for me,” Sombra replied, lazily kicking a hoof. Bowser leaned forward in his seat, his mirth toned down considerably.
“What’s bugging ya? It’s ruining my vibe.”
“Am I really that transparent?”
“Sure; your face is longer than usual. So what’s eating ya already?”
Sombra sighed. “If you must know, it’s about what you said to me earlier today, when we played with your... dolls.”
“I didn’t make you sound cool enough? Or because I called ya partner? I could come up with a solo act for you next—”
“No you dolt, it has nothing to do with your over-elaborately staged cry for help.”
“Then what?”
“The last thing you said, about me, and how you didn’t think I was so bad.” Sombra trotted solemnly toward the fireplace. “After all the times I stepped on your toes, got in your way, even tried to overthrow you, it was startling to hear that kind of admission. And that opened up an entirely bigger realization.” He paused a moment, looking to the side before continuing. “Everything you’ve done these past days, have been the nicest thing anyone has ever done for me. And, freakishly enough, you have been the only one to show any form of kindness to me in recent memory.”
“...Seriously?”
“Quite serious.” Sombra looked back to the fire. “That gave me cause to think back on something I hadn’t thought about in a long time. On the times before my arrival here, before talking mushrooms and turtles and chaotic misfortune filled my life. Back when I was truly ‘King’... Is it alright if I get comfortable?”
Bowser waved a claw. “Knock yourself out.”
Sombra nodded in modest appreciation, and with a glow of his horn he undid his cape and laid it on the floor before the fireplace, placing himself down upon it. Curling his legs close to his body, he stared into the soothing warmth of the fire as he resumed.
“That remark you made earlier, about me being heartless? Just one of many entitlements, attributed to me by those whom I enslaved. They called me cruel, a monster without feeling or remorse, and they had every right to. My rule had burned into their memories an affliction of pain and despair brought upon by the very thought of my name. What had been a peace-loving society, I showed them a future of misery without end.”
“Heh, pretty hardcore stuff, if that's true.”
“Oh, it was very true. True enough to catch the attention of the land’s two ruling princesses. Hmph, I still remember the day they came to dethrone me: no peace talks, no negotiations. Just immediate banishment. They didn’t even find a need to hold trial. Far beyond such civility was what they thought of me; like any monster, I had to be put down without question.”
Sombra looked at his hooves in a long silence before resuming. “I was condemned to the shadows indefinitely instead of outright executed. Spare themselves the unpleasantries, yet the alternative proved to be much crueler. Without shape I was trapped beneath layers of ice, a forgotten shadow amidst frigid crystals. I can never forget how the cold felt that entire time. A biting freeze that seeps into your very soul, driving mad those who do not perish from first exposure. That growing madness became my only companion, as my sanity was steadily eaten away by it.
“Each year in my thousand year imprisonment, I could feel my mental faculties corroding away, little by little, in increasing agony. My reason gave way to unequivocal hate to those who put me there, and I became mindless, losing sight of who I had been. I was steadily becoming the pitiless monster they all feared me for, and it hurt beyond imagining.
“I could feel myself dying, although my spirit wouldn’t wane.” His eyes grew downcast. “Plunging deeper into fathomless darkness. Becoming less myself, less pony, less... real. So endless...” A choked sob cut off any further words as his stolid composure crumbled before a fresh flow of tears. Bowser, up to this point fixated by the morose tale, immediately got to his feet.
“Hey, you crying? H-hey, listen, when I called you Sob-ra the other week, I wasn’t being serious, okay?”
“I just... No, it’s just pitiful,” Sombra said, fighting through the stinging tears and heavy breaths to regain some semblance of his earlier control. “What has this place done to me? A cruel emperor of grand infamy, and I’m blubbering away. But, but I’m just... afraid.”
“A... fraid?”
“Pathetic I know, but...” A violent sniff disrupted him. “Remembering what that did to me: the torturous nature of it, that loss of self. How I barely avoided oblivion by the slimmest of margins. I, I never want to face that, that, damning cold. Alone, in the dark... not alive... just raw hate and nothing more...”
The stallion gave in to more crying, but Bowser stomped over to his side, bent down, and patted him on the back, offering words with as much comfort as a hulking turtle dragon could muster. “Hey, there there. It’s alright. There’s no ice prison or anything like that. Just a nice fire, in a safe, awesome study in a big, even more awesome castle.”
Sombra shuddered as he controlled himself somewhat. “I had forgotten how horrible it was. No place to go, no real company to speak of, and for so long. How could anyone recover from that?” Sombra broke into crying once again, seemingly inconsolable. In the face of this newly revealed fear wracking the stallion, Bowser did the most desperate thing he could think of: he hugged him. The thick scaly arms stopped Sombra’s shaking, but it didn’t stopped his tears completely.
“Never knew you had it so rough,” Bowser said in a surprisingly soft voice. “Can’t say I know what you’ve been through. All my life I’ve never been truly alone; there was always somebody around, even if I despised them. Heck, I’ve even been chummy with my biggest enemies from time to time. But you though, heh, you’re something else entirely.” The koopa began unconsciously petting the unicorn’s mane. “You just confirmed how tough a guy you really are.”
“H-huh?”
“Yeeeah. I mean, a thousand years sealed away, then coming out of it ready to conquer, I say you’d have to be made of some pretty tough stuff. Not only that, but you gotta be extremely tough to not only survive, but also be as smart, cunning, refined, and half-as-awesome-as-me big shot as you are. Anyone less than what you are would’ve been crushed after a month, a year if we’re being generous. So in the battle between thousand-year prison and you, you’ve won it, eh, hooves down. No contest.”
A few sniffles came from Sombra as the scaly embrace calmed him down some. He nudged his head deeper into Bowser’s chest before saying, “Just, hold me a while longer. To prove I’m still real.”
“Sure thing, Sombra. Kinda weird, but you got it.”
Allowing the warmth of the fireplace to soothe him, Sombra laid down his head onto Bowser’s lap and snuggled restfully. As his eyes began to slowly close, Bowser snuggled him right back, though somewhat awkwardly.
An unpleasant noise woke Sombra from his restful slumber, the light of morning revealing that he was still lying on the floor of the study. What’s more, he was still in the cradling arms of Bowser, who snored away loudly over him with a snot bubble. A forceful nudge from Sombra’s horn startled the overgrown lizard awake.
“Huh Buh Whuuh? I’m awake I’m awake! Uh?” Bowser looked down at the stallion on his lap. “Oh, morning there.”
“Did you sleep here the whole night?”
“Huh, I guess I did.” Bowser made an embarrassed grin. “Your fur felt all soft and fuzzy like a stuffed animal, and you looked all adorable asleep and I didn’t want to wake ya, so I musta drifted off sitting here.”
“A-adorable!?” Sombra said with all the surprise of someone receiving a punch to the gut. Bowser merely chuckled at his reaction.
“Uh, yeah. Like one of them over-sized Shetland ponies, the kind people keep as pets.”
“That’s just fantastic; truly the low point of my tyrannical career, being regarded as a houehold pet.” Sombra made a pitiful sigh, just as Bowser patted him on the head.
“You slept pretty good. Felt great to get all that off your chest, huh?” Bowser asked.
“Yes, it did,” Sombra replied. “Something about this world has made me more receptive to my emotions; that was the first time I’ve displayed such weakness. But, I appreciate you for listening and, most sincerely of all, for not mocking me once.”
“Aww, I wouldn’t do that. You were really hurting, I could tell. I admit, I can be a little rough and crude about things, but I’m not completely insensitive to others’ feelings.”
“...Thank you.” Sombra snuggled Bowser a little. “And not a word to anybody, right?”
“Yup, secret’s safe with me. And I don’t even have my fingers crossed for this one.” Bowser held up both his hands to show that, indeed, nothing was crossed. “So, wanna get breakfast?”
“Yes, I am feeling hungry. Though, I think I should head back to my room and pick up my armor. Don’t want to raise any suspicions about what happened here.”
“Good point. I’d definitely not want my minions getting the idea that I’ve gone soft, so we both got something to lose if either of us blab.”
“Indeed.” Sombra got back up on his hooves along with Bowser, and magically lifting up his ruffled cape he gave it a shake before putting it over his back. He turned and headed for the door. “I will see you in the dining hall.”
“I’ll arrange some lettuce. Extra crisp, to celebrate a new man! Erm, stallion.”
A smile crept on Sombra’s face as he left the study, closing the door behind him. Unbeknownst to him, while going in search of his suite, a Hammer Bro on patrol witnessed his departure from behind a pillar, and immediately darted off in the other direction. Soon he came upon a red-shelled Fire Bro and skidded to a halt.
“Dude, something weird is going on!” he said. “Lord Bowser has been getting waaay too cozy with that Sombra guy.”
The Fire Bro sighed. “I’m fully aware of that. And the sad thing is, I don’t think it’s some mind control.”
"Then, what do you think it is?"
The Fire Bro only looked at his fellow soldier in silence, before turning around and walking over to the nearest window. With arms crossed behind his shell, he looked long and hard across the land, mouth set firm.
"Something very, deeply, weird."