//------------------------------// // 3: The Next to Last Straw // Story: Pinkie Pie's Problem // by JP Jackson //------------------------------// Pinkie wandered her way around town trying to figure out what was going on inside her screw-bally head! She had had a superific fun time at the convention she was sure of that. But she still didn’t really understand what this “Love” that everypony, except her, apparently knew all about yet was unable to explain! She looked up at the ponies wandering around the town square. Each face was familiar, all of them she though knew well, but with her new knowledge, she wondered if she really did. This Love thing sounded really fun, a special friend, someone who is just for you? She didn’t understand why nopony had told her about it before. She felt a little more than angry at being left out. But all thoughts of turning everypony into cupcakes dissolved when she saw A.J. come ambling down the street. That was it! She could ask A.J. she didn’t know why she hadn’t thought of that before! She zipped over next to the farm pony. “Hey there A.J.” Apple Jack’s eyes opened wide in shock when she saw Pinkie cross he path. She tried to weave around her. But Pinkie dashed to the side to block her retreat. “I need to ask you something!” “And I’d be happy to answer later, sugar cube, but I have to get to the train station-.” “But I don’t know what love is and Twilight and Rarity say I have it but not to worry because it’s not a cure, so Twilight doesn’t know the counter spell to a curse that doesn’t exist, which I think she should, you never know if the curse is just PRETENDING that it doesn’t exist so that you wake up one day and POOF you’re cursed! But Rarity says that love is someone who completes you and that gentlecoalts are actually brutes but that doesn’t make since because those are opposites (I looked it up) and how can a Stallion be both? But this all come back to I don’t know if I’m in Love yet!” Pinkie finished and took a big breath. A.J.’s face contorted with frustration. “Consarnit! How come every time you have a one word problem, you can somehow expand it to a paragraph?” Pinkie shrugged, skill she guessed. A.J. huffed, and continued walking. “When ya’ fall in love you get married, that’s ma’ two bits, now I have to go!” She pushed past Pinkie and galloped toward the station. Married? Like Mr. and Mrs. Cake? THAT’S IT. She spun in place; she couldn’t believe she hadn’t thought of it before! They would be perfect! She couldn’t believe what a frosting head she was! The Cakes had taken he on as their apprentice when she first came to ponyville they had let her live above their bakery and taught her everything she knew about baking and making treats, she was sure they would be able to explain to her what Love is! She galloped to Sugar Cube Corner, the shop where she both lived and worked. It was mid-day, so the Cakes should be tending shop. The swing doors whipped wildly back and forth as she bolted through. But to Pinkie’s dismay the cakes were nowhere to be seen. The only pony standing in the small bakery was a blue rainbow maned pegasus. “Oh, hey Pinkie,” Rainbow Dash said. “Good thing you’re here! We need-.” But Pinkie didn’t give her friend time to finish her statement. She slammed the racer pony to the floor and spoke in an excited squeaking voice: “I don’t know what love is and Twilight and Rarity say I have it but not to worry because it’s not a cure, so Twilight-.” “Celestia’s giant glowing dung! Are you still on about that?!” Pinkie was shocked that her friend was aware of her predicament. Rainbow dash took this breaking concentration to slip out from the young pony’s pinning hold. “How do you-.” “It’s called a phone Pinkie,” Rainbow Dash quipped “You really should stay up to date on technology.” Pinkie shook herself vigorously to focus her attention back on Rainbow Dash. Rainbow Dash was the town weather pony, in charge of maintaining a proper weather pattern and keeping the seasonal changes in order. Although the brash pegasus would rather spend all day dashing (Pinkie giggled at her unintentional pun) around the sky racing imaginary rivals (and always wining). Perhaps she was not her first choice for advice, but the pegisus always felt emotions with the whole of her body, if she had ever experience love, she should be able to explain it to her. Pinkie opened her mouth to ask Rainbow dash her question, which was starting to become an automatic action, but the pegisus was already noncalontly walking out the door. “I’ll catch ya’ latter a’right?” “But Rainbow Dash!” “I’m not getting caught up in your sappy little quest for the meaning of Love!” she snapped and took off out of the door soaring up into the sky. But pinkie took off after the weather pony, Rainbow Dash being the fastest flyer in equestrian had never stopped her from chasseing her down before! Pinkie looked to the left and the right, then up at rainbow dash. Judging by her trajectory, speed of flight and angle of decent she was head just outside of town. Pinkie reached down and popped a peace of turf out of the ground. She had a secret system of tunnels that lead all over ponyville and the surrounding area, she had discovered the tunnels about a year ago, apparently nopony else knew they existed. By using the tunnels she could reach any point in ponyville even before Rainbow Dash! She dove into the dark cavern and closed the sod that served as a door. Two seconds later she was at the edge of town by the Everfree forest. Rainbow Dash dove down and skidded to a halt in front of the pink pony. “How did you!?” Pinky pinned Rainbow dash to the ground by one of her wings, and glared menacingly into her eyes. “What is Love,” she hissed, emphasizing each word. The Weather pony let out a squeak of fright. “Um, is everything alright?” a small voice asked. The two mares turned to see a small pegisus pony, with a pale yello coat and a flowing pink mane. Fluttershy was in charge of taking care of the animals around town. She was soft spoken and rarely got involved in arguments, but when she got angry, OH CELESTIA, she got angry. Pinkie released her captive friend and turned to the new arrival. “Do you know what Love is Fluttershy? “um, I’m not sure I’m the best pony to talk about that, Rarity might-.” “But I’m not asking Rarity, I’m asking you!” “I-I don’t know, I’m sure Twilight would-.” “But what is YOUR answer? “I-I don’t-.” “ANSWER THE QUESTION!” She had had enough! Everypony knew what this Love thing was but refused to tell her for so long! She would have an answer! In her rage, Pinkie failed to see the two figures being lead by rainbow dash up the hill.