- Member Since 24th Sep, 2014
- offline last seen March 28th
Wandering Pigeon
I came here to eat breadcrumbs and indiscriminately shit on cars. And I'm all out of breadcrumbs...
Wandering Pigeon
Joined 24th Sep, 2014 ·
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So, how long until Rarity becomes so foal like that she can't do anything by herself? Seems like that's what it would take for Sassy to come to her senses, assuming Rarity's friends don't find out first.
Why has this got so many downvotes? I can't see anything wrong with the grammar or technical execution.
9549121 I'm kind of thinking it has to do with how Sassy is here. This is pretty cruel behavior.
9549163
True.
9549121
Because this has been uploaded about an hour ago? That means it's on the front page of fimfic. That means people that dont like diapers will see it before the people that check their feed for new stories. It'll should balance itself out.
Eh downvotes are just from ignorant people who praise some fetishes and hate on other fetishes, including stuff like this. Most people are this way but the important thing is that you write for fun and for yourself, plus the people who like this can now look at it whenever they want. They couldn’t do that if the story never existed in the first place. For the most part, I doubt W.P cares about those downvoter people’s thoughts anyways.
9549121
Also, thank you for the comment on the grammar. While there wasn’t really much to correct since W.P is pretty good at finding those before letting me take a look, I like to give myself a little pat on the back for making a story as perfect as possible so a story can be read without interrupting a readers “flow”.
9549050
Probably wouldn't take very long at the current rate, but then who's to say Sassy would let it get that far? Foals can't make dresses after all.
9549146
No worries. I knew ahead of time this wouldn't be everyone's cup of tea.
This was great! Do you think you'd ever make a sequel?
9549276
A sequel is always possible, but I don't think that it's likely. I got down the idea I wanted to for this one, so unless I think of a continuation I really like then I don't think one will happen. But even so, I'm glad to hear you enjoyed it!
hehe What a crazy boutique I wonder if Raroty will ever get changed
9549668
Oh she will... eventually
9549175
Fair enough. I would only downvote a story on technical execution.
9549195
I suspect they get a few from the content, which tends to get downvoted without being looked at.
Whoah! Don't mess with Sassy Saddles. She's certainly a mare to not cross. Especially when we learn her talent in magic is hypnosis.
It seems all Unicorns have a specialty in their magic. Rarity is great with working with fabrics and items that can be made into clothes. Twilight and Starlight both have their own ways of using magic for strong spell casting. Then you have Trixie who is capable of creating illusions. Cadence impacts emotions and Shining Armor is adept at shields.
Sassy Saddles having hypnosis power is certainly a hidden gem and one I know her desperation may make her use in all the wrong ways after all she'd been through up until her moment with Rarity.
Eventually her friends would come to find her and Sassy would have to deal with it. The question would be if Sassy would ever let her magical hold on Rarity go given the potential for being found out by Twilight? Twilight can be a little dense at times, but she's hardcore when she knows something needs fixed.
9550910
Sassy will probably have to give up once Twilight goes looking. I mean, it's not like Twilight would end up hypnotized too... right?
Well sassy your shop will fail once the trend passes. Fads fade. Also don’t think Rarity will even be able to focus with blisters on her plot from the rash
9564802
Even Sassy's going to have a hard time making her forget about that.
She is going to have one heck of a rash come morning, isn't she?
Good one as usual. You really nailed Rarity's mind.
One improvement point is that Sassy really didn't push Rarity push. Almost all the arguments came from Rarity's own mind. Sassy should still somehow plant those ideas in her.
In mind control like this it's most effective to lay down some ideas that don't directly involve the diaper. Such as that the future of Rarity's shop is more important than her immediate discomfort. Or remind her that she is alone (without mentioning the diapers)
"I really admire your dedication Rarity, being willing to work alone for so long."
Not only does that enforce to Rarity that she is alone but it also would make her feel slightly afraid to lose her only current companion.
I get that it's mind control but I would still like it if the process of it was a little more involved. That Sassy does need to get Rarity to open up to the idea. Sassy's magic could be that those 'ideas' don't stay as just temporary but manifest themselves as laws in her mind.
"...No, no that’s not right. Sassy gave me this diaper and she knows what’s best, Rarity determined. It couldn’t be her padding’s fault. It’s… my fault…?"
I would think Rarity would still try to logically deduce it. After all logically why would the diaper ruin it? It's not the diaper, it's her own desire to hold it.
That is a great move to make Rarity submissive. The idea that Sassy will protect her.
Maybe to amplify that have Sassy take on a protecting attitude when she does show off Rarity. Not allowing her to be said nasty things to or being laughed at too loudly. Being treated as very fragile would reinforce her submission.
She’s going to end up in jail for this.
9598400
Not bad ideas. Will probably aim for a more involved process in my next mind control fic.
9598544
Starlight didn't
9600125
To be fair, it’s never been stated whether or not what she did was actually illegal.
9600144
True, but what she does in Every Little Thing She Does isn't too dissimilar to Sassy here is all I'm saying.
9600125
It doesn't have to be long. You can do what I described using only around 5 sentences or so. But Sassy should give Rarity some idea what to think. Right now it entirely comes from Rarity's own mind and I don't see why Rarity would think these things. Once she is in a trance and under Sassy's control than her mind will indeed build on the idea. However Sassy needs to lay the foundation of this.
9600281
Yeah but I’m pretty sure this is closer to slavery than what Starlight did plus I’m pretty sure that this would count as holding someone against their will.
9600412
Which Starlight also did, lol. Not trying to say Sassy shouldn't or wouldn't go to jail for this, I was just pointing out how Equestria is usually pretty lax about this sort of thing.
9600398
Well once she's in the trance Sassy has given her a command that keeps repetitiously appearing, compelling Rarity to stay on task. That's why she keeps thinking of those things, because she's trying to maintain the pace she's being compelled to keep. I don't think having Sassy seed any more ideas than she already does is all that necessary right now.
9600641
Well it is necessary to keep Rarity into it. After all if her brain works too hard it might find things that Sassy doesn't want. Also I think it would add to the story if Sassy makes a mistake at some point. She would of course correct it but that not everything goes completely smoothly.
9600674
Could you elaborate? I'm not sure I entirely get how that's supposed to undo the mind control.
As for mistakes, Sassy did make one: not realizing that Rarity's diaper was leaking, which she then blames on Rarity to cover up.
9600904
You don't? I thought that you really integrated it into your story. That Sassy keeps Rarity distracted in making dresses to keep her from figuring things out.
Really? That felt more planned to me. To make Rarity feel ashamed and in need of guidance.
9600908
Ah, that's what you meant. I assumed you were talking about Rarity working so hard she would find problems that Sassy wouldn't want and then solve them for her, or something. It didn't make a lot of sense, but now I see what you were getting at.
Probably could have conveyed it better, but no, it wasn't part of Sassy's plan. She just capitalized on it.
9600912
Oh, no no. She isn't yet to the point where she would take such steps out of her own initiative.
Yeah, Sassy does have quite over-the-top reactions. Not Pinkie Pie level but still more than is needed.
Meh
Another lovely short story
I kinda wish this would get a sequel where one of the others realizes what happens and hypnotizes Sassy as karma
well...this...was...quite...interesting...I...guess?