Spike, the cute little dragon among ponies. Twilight Sparkle's number one assistant. But not many ponies know, that there is more to him than meets the eye.
Spike.
The dragon among the ponies.
Twilight and her friends know, that he would do anything to help them.
What they don't know, is just how much he is already doing for them. And for Equestria.
This story takes place before and during episode "Look Before You Sleep" from season 1.
Contains violence and sexual themes.
Original idea of a story with Spike as a 'secret protector' from Lokimen, thanks man. ;)
Once again big thanks to my friends irky3 and Kic for proofreading and sharing their thought on this fic.
“Look how many bananas I can juggle!” Princess Celestia was using her magic to levitate about twenty bananas.
“We're not sure if it is technically juggling, but it sure is impressive, sister.” But Luna didn't look like she was impressed.
Princess Celestia's humor was pretty random, but over the years he grew to like it.
“Princess Celestia.” He interrupted the sister talk. Few yellow missiles were fired at him, but with one swift move he dodged them. “You were expecting me?”
“As agile as always.” Celestia smiled. “But you can't dodge my banana arsenal forever, one day I will get you!” Princes winked.
“I'm sure you will, your majesty.” Spike smiled back.
***
“So, can you tell me how is my pupil doing?” Princess Celestia asked, as they were going through castle's corridors.
“Well, pretty good to be honest. She gets pretty well along with other ponies. And there I was worrying that it will take her long time to make some friends.” Spike replied.
“Nonsense Spike! She is going to be a princess soon! It's obvious, that she can make friends easily! EASILY!”
“If you say so, your highness.” Spike smiled. “I'm not so sure about this 'soon' part though.”
Princess clearly wanted to say something more, but door opened before them.
“S! How are you? How was the trip?”
“Hi, A! Long time no see!” Replied Spike.
“Shining Armor! Spike! Why are you using these silly nicknames?!” Screamed Princess. “Who had such a stupid idea?!”
“Well, that would be you.” Spike looked at Princess Celestia with serious expression on his face.
“That was my idea?” She was clearly shocked by this news.
“Yes.”
“Princess Celes-arghpfltrt...!” Shining Armor was interrupted by Princess Celestia. By Princess Celestia's banana in his mouth to be exact. In his throat, to be precise.
“Tshhhhhhhhhhh! Are you crazy, A? Do you want to blow my cover?!” She looked around before staring into his eyes. Then she slowly took out the banana.
“I'm really sorry, Pri...C! I'm sorry, C!” Shining Armor was a quick learner.
“Oh, hi agent S! Didn't see you here in a while! Do you have a break from protecting Princess Twilight?”
“Hello, agent D.” Answered Spike with a smile. “Good to see you. I think that Twi will be able to handle herself for some time. And I'm sure that few other agents were dispatched as my substitute, am I right, C?” Spike turned his head to face Princess.
“...Maaaaybe.” Answered Celestia.
“Good to hear.” Said Derpy.
“And how is going the 'Whooves' case, D?” Asked Spike.
“Rather smoothly, to be honest.”
“I'm sorry, but we need to go, agent D.” Interrupted Celestia. “Agent S has a very important task and we can't waste time.”
“Of course, C.” Answered Derpy and bowed a little.
Princess Celestia, Spike and Shining Armor went through the doorway and then downstairs.
“So what is my task exactly, C?” Asked Spike.
“You will know soon enough.” Answered Princess Celestia, as they were going lower and lower.
***
They were now going through another corridor. They were pretty far underground, lack of windows was one of the things that were reminding about that.
"Is it soon enough already?"
"I think, that you're supposed to know that, C." Said Spike.
"You're clever, S. That's why you're one of my best agents." Celestia used her magic to open the door. "We're here."
They entered the room. Or to be more precise: they entered a cavern, and pretty big one at that. But although it was a very big cave, inside was as bright as in daylight. Magic lanterns illuminated whole place, it was a spectacular sight.
But even more amazing was the number of ponies that were in the room. There were dozens of them, probably even more than a hundred. And every one of them looked busy. Some were sitting at their desks, looking at some papers. Others were working with weird machines. Many were just going somewhere in a hurry.
To their left, about twenty meters from them were biggest wooden desk in entire room. Behind that desk, on the wall, was map of Equestria and known world. On left and right side of the map were hanged big emblems of Equestria, each about two meters wide, five meters high. It wasn't separated by walls or anything like that, but this was Celestia's office.
Spike knew that. After all, it wasn't his first time in Equestria's Secret Service headquarters.
"What's all the fuss about?" Asked Spike. He knew that normally headquarters aren't this lively.
"C, A, these are the reports you asked for." Orange colored pegasus was carrying few scrolls.
"Thanks." Said Shining Armor as he magically picked the scrolls.
"No problem." Said orange pegasus and flew away.
"As you probably know, agent S, this commotion is caused by a problem." Celestia answered Spike's question.
"I figured as much. What kind of problem, C?"
"Big one."
"Can you be more specific?"
"Of course." Celestia rolled her eyes. "We're suspecting, that somepony is trying to mess with weather."
"How?" Spike was surprised. "Controlling weather is a task that could be handled either by powerful magic, on a level of alicorns or ancient dragons, or by labor of many pegasi ponies..." They approached Celestia's desk. "Is that even possible?"
"Well..." Celestia sat down and grinned. "Now this is a comfortable chair. I think that this is the most comfortable chair. It was worth going all this way."
"We're not entirely sure, S." Shining Armor decided to answer Spike's question. “We've received reports of weather anomalies.”
“To be honest, A, this doesn't sound so anomalyish to me.” Spike looked rather puzzled. “These things happen.”
“That's true, but these don't hit random targets. It's more like they are controlled by someone.”
“Controlled?” Spike was even more surprised. “And why do you think they are controlled?”
“Well... for one we've got reports of lighting strikes hitting same exact spot multiple times. And agent B got hit by one of these lighting bolts.”
“Buahahaahaha!!!” Spike got little too happy about Blueblood's misfortune. “Serves him right, I don't like this dick.” Spike wiped the tear from the eye. “Did he got anything?”
“Not really...”
“Incompetent dick.” Spike grinned, then looked at Princess Celestia. “No offense, C.”
“Oooooooooh... THAT CHAIR!!!” Duties of the head of sercret service absorbed Princess entirely.
“Well, S, we all here share your feeling about B...” Started Shining Armor, trying to keep his voice down.
“Is he dead?”
“No, he's in hospital, currently in coma.”
“Darn it.” Spike didn't looked pleased. “Better that than nothing I guess.”
“Well, maybe we're not as passionate about B as you are, but it sure is nice to not have him around.” Shining Armor started to walk. “But we have work to do, come with me, S.”
“Later, C.” Said Spike as he followed Shining Armor. Princess didn't say anything, as she still was melting on the most comfortable chair.
***
Spike was looking at his reflection in the mirror. Young drake was wearing a fancy tuxedo with a red bow-tie.
"Now this is what I call classy." Spike winked to his own reflection.
"Yeah, you look nice, S." Agreed Shining Armor.
"Nice doesn't even begin to describe it. I look awesome. But there's one thing missing." He snapped his fingers. "That's what I'm talking about!"
"Tell me one thing, S. We know each other for a long time."
"Very long." Agreed Spike.
"Tell me, why are you using magic so rarely?"
"I don't want to depend on it too much. And I use it more often than you think, A."
"For the mustache, I suppose?"
"You bet!" Spike stroked his mustache. "It's just too awesome." He stopped for a moment and looked Shining Armor in the eyes. “But you know, I just don't want to accidentally use magic around Twilight.”
“I guess you're right... I forgot how hard it must be for you to act like that around Twilight and her friends.”
“Well, it's hard at times.” Spike noticed distressed look on his friend face. “But don't worry, A. I do practice using magic quite often and I have some magic tricks up in my sleeve. You don't need to worry about Twi.”
“I know pal, I know.” Shining Armor and Spike did a bro fist bump. Or bro hoof bump. It's rather hard to tell when one of them has a fist and one has a hoof. “But back to the mission: do you have any questions, S?”
“About mission – not really. It's clear I should start in Cloudsdale and then take it from there.” Spike crossed his arms. “Simple spell will take care of walking on clouds, but how do I get there in the first place?”
“You're gonna love this, S.” Shining Armor smiled from ear to ear. “I have to say, C really went all out this time.”
“Go on.”
“Just follow me, Q will show you your new toys.”
***
“Hello, Q!” Shining Armor was the one to start conversation.
“Hi, Q!” Spike also marked his presence.
Rather old looking unicorn pony in a lab suit, with a gray mane and tail and only slightly darker coloration, turned his head around to face them.
“Finally! I thought you'll never show up.” He looked rather angry. “You're always doing this, S. It's getting on my nerves.”
“Sor-”
“Just messing with you, S.” He turned around and started walking across the room. “Come on now, you'll be pleased with what I've got for you.”
Spike and Shining Armor followed Q without any questions. He and his team earned respect of many agents. S and A included.
They approached table at the middle of the room.
“Well, let's start with these.” Q used his magic to levitate small wooden case with gold hinges and lock. “Standard writing set. Three quills, phoenix ones, according to your preferences. One scroll of paper and of course bottle of ink. As always, ink contains strong dormitive.”
“Looks like nothing new here.” Said Spike as picked up one of the quills. He really liked phoenix ones.
“It may look like it, but we worked pretty hard on this toxin. Now simple stab with the quill should put an adult colt to sleep in less than five seconds.”
“Now you're exaggerating a little... Ouch! Q! What the...!” Shining Armor was now taking a nap.
“I have to admit, pretty impressive.” Spike wasn't worried, he knew Q wouldn't do something that would harm his friend. “For how long will he be asleep at work?”
“Well, it depends, but it's between three and ten minutes. And him being A, I'd say it will be closer to three minutes. Little too short to get him in any trouble.” Q raised his head and looked at Spike. “Let us continue.”
“As you wish, Q.”
“I know you don't like this kind of weaponry, but these are our new throwing knives.”
“Well, they don't usually lead to very noble fights... But they come in handy sometimes...”
“They sure do, S, they sure do. We've changed them a little to better suit you.” Q grabbed one of them from the table. “We've made them from material much lighter and harder than steel, diamondium. It's state of the art.”
“Whoa, it's almost weightless!” Spike couldn't believe, that he had throwing knife in his claws. It felt like quill he was holding few moments earlier. But his eyes weren't deceiving him. There it was, dark gray throwing knife. “It feels well balanced, but does it even fly properly with such a little weight?”
“Good point, S, as always.” Q praised Spike. “It's too light for normal throwing it like normal throwing knife. It has to be enhanced with magic. Throw it more like missile, without rotation, with greater velocity.” Q demonstrated, knife almost reached target. “Well, maybe you should try.”
Spike looked at the knife in his hand. He enchanted it with magic and threw. He hit exactly in the middle, perfect throw. These knives really were something and Spike knew it.
“Now try to put a little more strength and aim for this pony armor.” Encouraged Q.
Spike picked up another knife, looked at the target and with one swift move he threw the knife. Hole in armor was the obvious reason for Spike's dropped jaw.
“I knew you'll find this impressive.” Smirked Q. “In your tuxedo there is room for eighteen of them. Three in each sleeve, with fast and easy access, each in it's own pocket, and twelve in inside pockets, as reserve.”
“I don't need this many!” Protested Spike. “Why would I need eighteen throwing knives, Q?!”
“Don't lament, you're carrying around much heavier things.” Q had a point. “But look at this, you're gonna love it.” He grabbed a dagger and showed it to Spike. Spike looked at him, not really amused
“Q, what exactly am I going to love about this?” REALLY not amused. “You know, that I hate daggers. They're so not in my style. I don't like assassinations and backstabbing...” Q forced dagger into Spike's hand. “I see... you didn't make this, did you?”
“We didn't. We received this artifact about three weeks ago, and as soon as I saw it, I knew you will love this.”
“Enchanted blade. This is really uncommon... to say the least. I don't know what to say, Q.”
“Don't say anything, just activate it.”
Spike did as he was told. In one moment dagger grew bigger, much bigger. It wasn't dagger anymore, but a one-handed sword. Spike could easily control size of the blade with his magic.
“Thanks, Q. I really LOVE it.”
“No problem, S. That's what I'm here for.” Q was always modest. Almost always.
“Uhh...” Shining Armor got up slowly. “I feel like...”
“You're awake at last!” Q scolded him. “I almost thought that we will have to look at the most awesome thing without you.”
“You've got something more, Q?” Spike was surprised, there was nothing left on the table.
“I sure do, and let me tell you, your mind will be blown.” Q smiled wide. “But for this one we will have to go to royal dockyard.”
***
Spike was amazed every time he visited royal dockyard. He was amazed how inappropriate that name was. Royal dockyard? There were hardly any ships build there, workers were spending most of their time on maintenance. It was more of a hangar. Hangar full of airships.
Somepony could be overwhelmed by sheer amount of airships, but each one of them was a sight to behold.
Closest to exit, and kept ready at most times, were Equestria's warships. There were about thirty battle cruisers, each of them required a crew of over half a hundred of ponies. With armor protecting whole ship, dozens of canons and countless places for archers and mages to attack from they were almost impossible to destroy. The mere presence of an airship like that could change the tide of battle.
Although times were peaceful now, it wasn't always that way. So it didn't surprise Spike, that vast armada of warships were ready to deal with potential threat.
Further in the back there were some more airships, much less lethal for a change. It was like a little museum of aviation. One could find here anything, from old fashioned hot air balloons to the state of the art, steam powered airships.
But centerpiece of this collection were two ships: Full Moon and Rising Sun. The very first two airships ever built in Equestria. And they were sight to behold.
In the meantime two unicorns and a dragon approached the door with “Authorized personnel only” sign. Shining Armor opened it and they went through.
***
Two royal guards looked surprised by their sudden appearance, but when they realized who just came in they only bowed.
“Sky, there you are.” Q spoke to navy blue unicorn. “Bring the Dragonfly here.”
“Yes, sir!” Sky Sailor immediately galloped away.
“Dragonfly?” Spike raised his eyebrow.
“Yeah, C gave it that name personally. She said that it would be a nice pun on you being a dragon that could not fly.”
“I appreciate her attention to details.”
“Yeah, whatever you say.” Sky Sailor was back with a rather peculiar vehicle, unsteadily approaching them. “We used to call it BMV, Barely Moving Vessel. I still think that this is pretty accurate.”
“That doesn't sound too awesome, if you ask me.”
“I didn't ask you, S. And it is not polite to interrupt somepony older than you.” Q turned his head to face the Dragonfly again. “Where was I...? Ah, yes. Barely moving isn't totally accurate, as it strongly depends on pilot's magical abilities. When we gave the prototype to Princess Luna we couldn't believe what she was able to do with it. She couldn't either. She kept that prototype for herself, I don't think you need anymore advertisement than that.”
“I don't.” Agreed Spike.
“Too bad, because you'll get it anyway.” Continued Q. “This is our newest airship. To keep it afloat we used a special gas, that is lighter than air. But in case of emergency hot air should suffice.”
“In case of emergency?” Spike decided, that it was good idea to interrupt Q.
“Well, if you had to rapidly decrease altitude there is a possibility of releasing gas to the atmosphere. If you combine that with ship's engines it will give you pretty fast dive. Of course after that you'll have to replace the gas with hot air if you don't want to integrate yourself into landscape.”
“So how can I avoid becoming part of the scenery?” Spike was sincerely interested in acquiring that knowledge.
“There's a burner that will heat up the air. Everything is described in user manual, I don't want to get in too many details.” Q grunted. “Control instruments are Sky's original idea. I have to say, that this kid did a great job. It would be great if he could focus on one thing for more than five minutes. Anyway, ship is moved around using magic enchanting devices. For example when you apply magical power to the ones used in this ship they suck air on one end and throw it out with great force on the other end, thus creating movement.”
“I've read somewhere about devices like that.” Protecting Twilight was rather boring task most of the time, so Spike often read books just to kill time.
“That's great. Now, get in there and show us what you've got.”
“Maybe I should look at the manual first?”
“Real colts don't read manuals, get in there and fly. It's pretty intuitive.” Q pressed Spike.
“I sometimes read the manual...” Shining Armor stated hesitantly.
“Princess Luna didn't read it.” Said Q. Nothing more was needed to convince Spike.
Cockpit of the vessel was pretty impressive, many gauges and blinking lights. Spike didn't know what are they for, but it didn't discourage him. He started with applying little magical force, flying around slowly. Controls were really intuitive, Q didn't lie about that. Spike soon started to go faster, turn tighter. He really enjoyed it, no wonder Princess Luna didn't return the prototype.
“Hey, S!” It was Shining Armor this time. “I don't want to spoil your fun, but we don't have all day.”
“Yeah, I know.” Replied Spike, as he landed in front of Shining Armor and Q. “Let's get the paperwork done and I'll be on my way.”
***
Princess Luna looked through the window, at the vessel that was now flying with great speed in direction of Cloudsdale.
“I have to ask you something, sister.” She started.
“Anything.” Few bananas fell to the ground as Celestia turned her head to face Luna.
“I know, that Spike is your good friend, and he is reliable. I agree, that as a dragon, a creature of great magical power, he is more than qualified to be Twilight's personal guard.” Luna turned around and looked in her sister in the eyes. “But don't you think he isn't really suitable to be a secret agent?”
“I don't follow you.”
“I mean, come one! He is a dragon! How can he be stealthy? How can he blend in with the crowd? He can act like one man army, but this doesn't make him a good material for a spy.”
“It doesn't make him good material for a spy.” Answered Celestia. “It makes him PERFECT material for a spy. And he can blend in and be stealthy as well as all my agents. Did you see that mustache?”
“Now I'm even more worried about our secret service.” Luna sighted. “But at least you could give him vehicle that doesn't stand out this much.”
“Oh, sister. What would that change? He is a dragon, it's not like he could just blend in anyway!” Celestia laughed.
“...Now I don't follow you, sister.”
“And it is one seriously cool vessel.”
“With that I must agree.” Said princess Luna and two sister looked through the window at the vanishing point, that was Equestria's number one secret agent.
Dragonfly was sailing smoothly through the blue sky. Spike was getting more and more used to it with every passing minute, but not many of them have passed before he got to Cloudsdale. This ship was getting pretty fast, when considerable amount of magic power was applied.
Weather factory wasn't too hard to find, it was now producing massive amounts of black clouds. Downpour was scheduled in two days after all.
“This will be a good place to start.” He said to himself when he got closer.
Dragonfly landed smoothly on the cloud. Before getting out Spike snapped his fingers, to cast a walk-on-clouds spell. He was trying his best to avoid death. Especially as stupid one as falling through the cloud.
Without wasting any time Spike went to the one of factory's back doors. They weren't even locked.
Spike was pleased with himself. He was able to get to Cloudsdale's weather factory without getting too much attention.
“Who are you?!” Security guard was looking at him suspiciously. So much for being like a ninja.
“My name is Spark.” Spike started with confidence in his voice. “I'm a tourist. I had to take a leak and got separated from my group. And I'm afraid now I'm a little lost, could you show me the way to the main hall?” Confidence is the key to success and Spike knew it.
“We don't let the tourists into the factory since the incident two weeks ago.” Horn glowed with activated magic as guard got ready to attack Spike.
“Oh... I see...”
Unconscious body of security guard fell down to the factory floor. Confidence AND martial arts are key to the success.
Time was running out now, this guard won't sleep forever. Spike checked his surroundings. Map on the wall was just what he needed. Quick look at it and he knew where he needed to go.
***
“See anything?”
“For the hundredth time: NO!” One of security guards was clearly irritated.
Spike was creeping through the factory hall, keeping low profile. It was harder than he thought, getting to the executive office that is.
“Is everypony crazy?!” He whispered to himself in anger, with his teeth clenched. “Why are here so many guards?!”
Indeed, there were quite many security guards. Plenty of them. More than actual workers to be honest. If it wasn't for commotion inside the hall (after all these dark clouds won't create themselves, and time was running out) it would probably be impossible to sneak through.
„What was that?” It was the irritated guard.
Spike hid behind one of the crates and held his breath. He heard him approaching, his hoofsteps were closer and closer. ”This is bad.” He thought to himself – and it was pretty bad. Not only there were many security guards here, there were also many civilians.
“Did you see anything?”
“For a THOUSAND TIME I DIDN'T FREAKIN SEE ANYTHING!!!”
Emotional problems to the rescue. Spike sighted with relief, this was way too close for comfort.
”You've gotta be kidding me...” He thought to himself, when he felt a familiar sensation. Moment later he heard a burp and saw a letter that materialized from a green flame.
“What?! We've got an intruder!”
“Damn it...” Spike dipped his claws in Q's ink. “Why does it always have to be like this?” With swift move he poked one guard in neck, which severely affected his ability to stay awake. “Why couldn't it be peaceful reconnaissance for a change?” Two more guards went to sleep. “Why has it to be like this... every... single... TIME!”
Situation was getting pretty rough. With several guards attacking him at the same time he was no longer in comfortable spot. Some of the security officers were now taking hits, as Spike couldn't even afford to not harm them anymore.
Well, this spot was somehow even less comfortable for these guards.
***
Spike parried incoming blow, grabbed guard's front leg and after swift throw colt landed on his back at Spike's feet.
“I thought that this was never going to end...” Spike said to himself as he sent the last one of the security guards to sleep with poke of his claw.
He looked around. There were no factory workers in sight, all guards were now neutralized. This will be such a pain in the butt to report...
“Look at the bright side, Spikey: at least the building itself wasn't destroyed in the process.” Grim smile appeared on his face.
But explosion kept him from admiring his joke for too long. He noticed some chippings flying at him. Fire breath was usually solving this kind of problems and this time wasn't any different.
“Get in! Get in!” Spike heard somepony's voice coming from the direction of rather recent explosion.
Few rays in different colors were shot. ”At least three mages.” Moments later the dust started setting down and Spike was able to see that in fact there were more of them – nine. Nine masked unicorns. But even without seeing their faces it was obvious, that they were quite confused.
“What is the meaning of this...?” This one was definitely a mare.
“Looks like someone did all the donkey work for us.” Pony with much deeper voice laughed. “We owe him a big thanks.”
“We can save that for later.” Spike said while approaching them. “We have job to do and time is running out.”
“Who are you?!” The deep-voiced, pitch black colored pony took a defensive position, his horn glowed. Rest of the group followed his lead.
“Easy, no need to be so nervous. Boss ordered me to ensure that everything goes according to the plan.” For a moment Spike thought that this just might work. That was until he saw the anger, the madness in unicorn's eyes.
“THIS SUCKER INSULTED US FOR THE LAST TIME!” Cried out the unicorn. Spike took a half of a step back and shook his wrists, he knew this is going to get wild. “DEATH TO THE DRAGON!”
Spike created magic shield in front of himself to deflect few rays that were fired at him. Immediately after that he canceled the spell and dashed forward. He saw a glimpse of light in corner of his eye, it was too late for shield or counterspell. He jumped forward, ray missed him, but just barely. Blast from explosion, on the other hand, send him flying. He was spinning in the air, situation was rather bad. These mages were better than he expected.
Spike inhaled and fired two firebolts in direction of the closest enemy before landing on the floor. He saw that firebolts were stopped by unicorn's magic shield. They were good enough to stop dragon magic? MUCH better than he expected.
But this wasn't good time to admire enemy's skills, one of them was bold enough to charge while Spike was still mid-air and now was at point-blank range, on the Spike's left-hand side.
Little dragon felt burning sensation on his cheek, as he dodged the spell, but just barely. His opponent wasn't so agile, claws sliced through gray unicorn's throat.
“Shadow!” Cried out one from the group.
“He's gone, Ember, focus!” Ordered their leader.
And indeed, Shadow was gone. He tried to stop blood with his hoof before falling to the ground moments later and dying rather unpleasant death.
But this was only a small victory for Spike, there was still eight of them left. And, as much as he hated to admit it, he was being cornered. And time was running out. He didn't know for how long the security guards will stay put, or when some civilians will get involved.
“Oh! I'm so sorry! I didn't mean to bump into you!” Gray pegasus mare in yellow safety helmet apologized to one of the unicorns, one that was separated from the rest.
“You little piece of shit, shut the fu...” Loud cracking noise interrupted the unicorn. He fell down to the floor with his neck broken.
“Need a helping hoof, S?” Derpy winked to Spike.
“KILL HER!”
Mages turned to face Derpy. This was exactly what Spike needed. He took out his dagger and rushed forward. In split second his dagger became a sword and third enemy was down. Lying right next to his head. Six left.
Spike wasn't going to stop there, but his next target wasn't going to die without a fight. Spike jumped up and prepared to attack, but unicorn mare managed to cast a magic shield. Spike struck like his sword were a spear, got through the shield, through the forehead and all the way to the floor. Magic shields are better against spells, than swords. That's something she will remember for the rest of her life.
Spike changed sword back to dagger – it was much easier to take it out this way.
Five left.
Derpy wasn't idling either. Or rather she couldn't, pretty deadly spells were keeping her busy. But she was never too busy to kill an enemy or two.
She soared into the air to avoid few rays and dived almost immediately. She quickly approached pair of mages. Right one was dealt with right away – roundhouse kick was enough to knock him unconscious. And to make his jaw look painful-kind of weird.
Second one was about to get an uppercut blow to the stomach, but Derpy jumped aside. And just in time too.
Powerful spell almost vaporized the dark brown unicorn. They were sacrificing own comrades to kill her. She really didn't like this kind of behavior. But she knew someone that REALLY hated that kind of behavior.
White unicorn was still casting spell. That is, he was casting it until blow to his side send him flying. Wall helped him to stop, but it wasn't really gentle about it. Floor didn't really cushioned the fall either.
He opened his eyes. Vision was still little blurry, but he didn't have any doubts who was the silhouette standing before him. What he didn't see was Spike's face, full of disgust and contempt.
He coughed out blood but managed to cast the spell once again.
Spike stretched out his left hand and blocked it without problem. Then with blast of shier magic power he pinned the white unicorn to the wall.
He gave him last contemptuous look before green flames consumed his white body and burned him to crisp.
Two left.
In the meantime Derpy attacked the leader, to give Spike time. But he surprised her, as he seemed to be the only one of them to know some martial arts. After few blows and blocks she managed to throw him and pinned him down to the floor.
“Now, Storm!” Deep voice ordered.
Derpy looked to her right, unicorn was already starting to cast a spell. She tried to fly away, but the leader wasn't going to let her.
Storm's horn glowed with bright magic and two daggers appeared out of nowhere. They pierced right through his head. One could think, that this was pretty bad spell, but in fact it was Spike who threw these knives.
And now there was only the leader left.
Derpy gave him a grin. He tried to cast some kind of spell but headbutt was enough to stop him.
“Thanks, D. This was pretty tight spot.”
“No problem, S. I was in neighborhood.” Smiled Derpy.
“Who are you and why are you working with this scumbag dragon?!” Derpy ended black pony's question by hitting him pretty hard in the face.
“Enough about me, tell me about yourself.” Started Spike. “What do you do for a living? Who are you working for?”
The unicorn was now mad. He casted a spell, but instead of seeing dead dragon he felt terrible pain in his head. Scream filled the hall.
“Now he should be a easier to deal with.” Spike once again changed sword back to dagger and put it back to scabbard. “You can release him, D.”
After rolling in agony for a few moments black unicorn managed to stand up on his shaky legs. But could he still be called an unicorn? He realized, that his horn was cut off clean.
“You... dick...” He was breathing heavily. “You...”
Spike grabbed him and pinned down to the floor.
“Listen to me, friend.” Spike was really irritated. “You really don't want to waste my time. What do you know about lighting strikes, who do you work for and where can I find him?”
“Ah, I see, so you're working for this bitch Cele...arghthhhh...!” Claws digging in one's shoulder can be really painful.
“I've said already, I don't like to talk about myself.” Spike weakened his grip. “Answer my questions before my patience runs out.”
“Why should I? You kill me anyway.”
“No, this is not necessarily the case. I could kill you, I could kill you slowly or I could leave this task to someone else. But then you will be interrogated and tortured for months before dying a slow and painful death.”
“And what gives you the right to do that?! What gives Celestia the right to do that?! She is such a pussy when it comes to taking back our land and even uses a dragon to kill the one who oppose her! This bitch should just go and die! Queen wouldn't let that happen...”
“Tough luck, history is written by the winners.” Spike said through clenched teeth. “Decide now, while my offer is still valid.”
Black pony looked around for a moment and sighted.
“I don't really know much about the one behind this, all I know is that he calls himself a Doctor and really hates Celestia. And that's all I really need to know.”
“Where can I find him?”
“We were supposed to meet on the HMS Sleipnir tonight. A yellow mare called Charming Risk was supposed to be our contact. Tickets are in my coat.”
He wasn't lying, at least not about the tickets. Spike put them in his pocket and stood up.
“Should I call for guards to take him away, S?” Asked Derpy.
“You promised me! We made a deal!” Dagger left only a hole in black pony's head.
“You saw it, D. It was self-defense.”
“And I suppose I will be the one to take care of this mess?”
“Thank you, D, you're the best! I will make it up to you!”
Spike was already running. He was wondering how many boxes of muffins will it take to really make this up to Derpy. But he decided, that this can wait.
“What is going on? Why aren't we departing?” Important looking pony, dressed in tuxedo, with top hat on his head, was clearly irritated.
“I'm very sorry, sir. We do not have permission to depart yet.” Light brown earth pony with cutie mark picturing a ticket was backing off a little.
“Then get the permission already! I want to get to Manehattan in this century!”
Snobbish pony was about to receive another apology, but characteristic, wheezing sound of Dragonfly interrupted their conversation. Spike landed near the base of the stairs to the ship. Navy blue unicorn was waiting for him.
“Take care of her, Sky!” Immediately after landing Spike jumped out and started to climb the stairs.
“Yes sir!” Sky Sailor got into Dragonfly and started his, rather long and wobbly, journey to the royal docks.
In just a moment Spike was on board. "Good thing I wrote that letter to Princess Celestia." Spike looked around, searching for something he could start with.
“Excuse me, sir.” He heard voice behind him. “Could you, please, show me your ticket?”
Spike didn't even turn around to face him. He just gave him nine tickets and started to walk, leaving surprised pony behind.
He knew where he should start - in the casino.
***
"This is HMS Sleipnir, we're ready for departure, requesting permission to take off."
Drop of sweat fell down to the floor. Certain flight controller was having rather stressful day.
"Repeat, this is HMS Sleipnir, requesting permission to take off."
"Request den..." He started with a weak voice and paused, when yellow blade dab his throat.
"They can go now." He heard a whisper in his ear.
"Permission granted! Repeat: HMS Sleipnir, you have permission to take off!" This nightmare was soon going to end.
"Roger that." Answered voice from the speaker, and almost immediately enormous ship started its first voyage.
Hoofsteps were clear indication, that someone was now trying to leave the room. Flight controller turned around and saw certain white alicorn. In yellow zorro-style mask. And yellow cape. Holding a banana with her magic.
Their eyes met.
"YOU SAW NOTHING! BANANA-MARE OUT!" She threw banana smoke bomb and vanished.
"...Just what was that?..." He asked himself. This sure will be a day to remember.
***
"Thirteen." Said croupier and moved large pile of chips in Spike's direction. Spike picked up few of them.
"Excuse me, sweetheart." He accosted nearby light pink earth pony mare. Her uniform was clearly indicating, that she was a waitress. Cutie mark picturing salver with glass on top was also supporting this theory.
"How can I help you, sir?" She asked with a smile.
"Could you please bring me another Lunar Shine?" He gave her a fifty-mark chip. Saying, that his tip was generous would be an understatement.
"Of course, sir, right away." Waitress nodded and went back to the bar.
"Sir, are you going to bet?" Croupier interrupted Spike. Dragon can't even look at waitress' flank in peace nowadays, as it turns out.
"Hmmmm..." Spike stroked his mustache. "Yes, everything on fourteen."
Croupier's eyes widened a bit for a brief moment, but he was a professional. And remarks about intelligence or sanity of a better would be considered as highly unprofessional, so after moving Spike's chips to the fourteen he spun the wheel and rolled the ball in opposite direction.
The ball was circling, from time to time colliding with roulette and changing it's trajectory. Few ponies were observing this ritual with tension written all over their faces. Spike, on the other hand, was observing certain pink mare. She brought him his drink and received another fifty-mark chip as a tip. He really has a thing for beautiful mares.
Ball was loosing it's momentum, tension was rising. "Well, it's nowhere close to what Luna would mix, but I guess it is acceptable." Spike thought to himself after trying a sip of Lunar Shine. Ball was barely moving. "That was quite a party." He smiled to himself after remembering Luna's 'welcome back' party.
"Fourteen..." Croupier couldn't believe his eyes.
"Well, at last." Spike finished his drink in one gulp.
"H-how did you... Why did you bet on fourteen?"
Spike raised his eyebrow a little. "Because I wanted to win?"
"B-but... how? How did you know?" Croupier was throwing out the little bit of professionalism he still had.
"I just did." Spike looked at his empty glass, then at the bar. And at the glass again. "Send this to my deposit please, I think that's enough of roulette for me. Thanks." He started walking in direction of particular bar. Vast emptiness in his glass was something that should be addressed as soon as possible.
"As you wish, sir." Croupier nodded a little. He pretty much regained his composure.
***
"Can I offer to buy you a drink?" Spike asked next to a yellow mare with beautiful red mane. Her cutie mark was a card. Queen of hearts to be exact.
She looked at him, from head to toe (and back to the head). "Sure."
"What can I get you?" Barman was spot on with his timing.
"Crazy Horse for the lady and Lunar Shine for me."
"Right away." Dark brown unicorn used magic to pick up few bottles and started mixing their drinks almost immediately.
"You're pretty observant, mister...?"
"Spike. Spike The Dragon." He turned to face her. "That wasn't really that hard to notice, miss Risk. But I have to admit, I was a bit surprised. It's not what I would call a girly drink."
"That may be true, but it's still nowhere near Lunar Shine, mister Spike. But more importantly, how do you know my name? I don't think that I introduced myself."
"I was told to met with you after completing my task." Sudden realization struck Spike's mind when he finished this sentence.
"Ah, so it is you. Didn't expect one person to be honest. So the job is done?"
"Here you go!" Barman, once again with great timing. Great for Spike at least.
"Thanks, man." Spike gave him few coins. "Why am I so stupid? Asked voice in his head. "Why didn't I ask what was their mission before I killed him..." At least now he had a drink to hide his perplexity. He took a gulp. "Of course it is done, why would I be here otherwise, miss Risk?" He smiled for a moment, but then turned around. "Barman, could you mix me another Lunar Shine?"
"Sure thing."
"I guess that's true, mister Spike." Charming risk took a sip of her cocktail.
"It is." He smiled. "So when am I going to meet with Doctor?"
"Trip will take an hour from Manehattan... So there's still quite some time."
"That's for sure." Flight to Manehattan was going to take another few hours at least. "I know, that it could sound weird, but can you tell me something about him?"
"You mean, about Doctor?"
"Yeah."
"You've never met him?" Charming Risk looked at him suspiciously.
"To be honest I know next to nothing about him." Spike was calm. Lunar Shine was a real confidence-booster. "All I know about him, is that we share some... we have similar world-view. That's pretty much why accepted this job, but I have never met him in person."
"Well, Doctor is rather mysterious individual, that's for sure." She smiled and took another sip of her cocktail. "What do you want to know, dear?"
"Hmmm..." Spike finished his drink. "Not sure where to start... Do you know him for long?"
Charming Risk looked into her glass for a moment with somewhat sad smile. Smile that Spike knew well. "Will be one year next week."
Spike took another sip of Lunar Shine and wondered for how long will it last. Because he felt, like this could be a pretty long story.
"I still remember the severe blizzard from that day..." Charming looked Spike in the eyes. "Have you ever been in Stalliongrad?"
"Not really, never had the occasion." Lied Spike. He had. And he was.
"It is a beautiful city, but weather there is just awful. And that day it was even worse, I don't remember second blizzard like that." She once again looked into her glass. "I don't know what would have happened, if Doctor didn't let me inside his apartment."
Charming Risk paused for a longer moment. She took another sip of her cocktail, stirred it a little with straw. "So, what else do you want to know, mister The Dragon?" Flirtatious smile she gave Spike wasn't exactly matching the topic of the conversation.
But this wasn't what surprised him enough to choke on his drink. "I thought she would be a little more effusive... He thought to himself while coughing.
"You okay, darling?" This smile wasn't a good match for a 'worried' look either.
Spike ignored that and cleared his throat. "So he was living in Stalliongrad and moved to Manehattan suburbs? That's pretty radical change."
"Oh, no, he was there only for business. He went back home three days later... and I followed him shortly after." Merrier smile appeared on her face.
Spike was starting to get Doctor's image in his head, but there was still one thing missing. "I told you before, that Doctor and I share similar world-view. In particular reluctance to the member of our royalty. Do you know what are his reasons?"
"He never told me. And I never was really curious enough to ask." Her smile faded. "Is it something important for you?"
"Not hugely important, but I'd sure like to know what motivates someone, that can be my... business-partner."
"And what about you?"
"Well..." Spike took a sip from his more and more emptier glass. "Today's dragons are only a shadow of former glory... And Celestia was individual, that greatly contributed to dragon's downfall."
"I've never heard about that..." Risk looked surprised.
"There are many dark secrets in Equestrian history, that you won't hear about in school. Or almost anywhere else to be exact." Spike told truth, for a change.
They remained silent for few moments. Charming, with depressed look on her face, was staring at her drink.
"Enough of these gloomy topics, let's change scenery." Charming Risk stood up and started trotting towards exit.
Spike followed her. Of course after emptying his glass. "Where would you like to go then?"
"I was thinking about swimming pool... Dragons aren't afraid of water, are they?" Charming mocked him a little.
"Dragons, miss Risk, aren't afraid of anything." Answered Spike with grin on his face.
But his smile faded a little when he noticed two well built stallions following them. He saw them earlier in the casino, they were observing him and his companion. Spike knew, that the chance of them just wanting to stare at Charming's flank some more were pretty slim, and that meant trouble.
***
"This ship never ceases to amaze me... I think they've got everything here." Said Charming Risk when they were walking by bowling hall.
"Well, Sleipnir was build to emphasize how prosperous Equestria has become in recent years. It's only natural to build it with such splendor... but I have to agree, it amazes me too." This was the first time Spike was more interested in two stallions than in chatting with mare.
At this point in time there was no doubt about it - they were followed. Two earth ponies, both in suits, both wearing sunglasses. They looked like thugs. Thugs in suits, but still thugs.
"You don't want to go to the swimming pool?"
Spike's surprised look was taken for an answer.
"You look kind of gloomy, mister The Dragon..."
"Guess that's just how I look, miss Risk." Laughed Spike. "But seriously, you don't have to worry about that, I do enjoy swimming. Although today I'm thinking about jacuzzi."
Charming didn't have time to verbalize any more of her doubts, because they reached their destination.
***
"This would be really nice, if not for the lack of Lunar Shine." Spike thought to himself. He was soaking up in jacuzzi while watching Charming in the swimming pool.
It was almost two hours since they arrived, and the pool was getting more and more empty with every passing minute. Actually, dark gray colored stallion was now leaving, and that meant there was only him and Charming left. And of course these two thugs, but they weren't technically at the pool.
Another half an hour have passed and nothing happened. Charming was still swimming, water in jacuzzi was still a delight, and thugs were still observing them from 'safety' of their 'hideout'.
"Maybe they really are just some perverts?" Spike entertained himself with this thought, but he knew it wasn't an option. These two were following them for quite some time. Charming didn't seem to notice them. "Are they her bodyguards...? She wasn't checking if they were following us... Maybe this Doctor send them to make sure everything went smoothly?" But before Spike came to any conclusion Charming Risk came to him.
"Do you mind?" She asked, but didn't waited for Spike's answer before joining him.
"You're quite a swimmer, miss Charming."
"Why, thank you, mister The Dragon." She smiled flirtatiously. "I hoped that you'll show me dragon style or something like that."
"Well... I also hope to show you dragon style." He grinned. "That's why I'm conserving my stamina for later."
"I didn't expect you to be such a pervert!" She laughed and dabbed him slightly. Then she turned around and got out of jacuzzi. "So... shall we get going then?"
The way she moved, the way she waved her flank, the way she wagged her tail... and of course the way she looked at him. "Jackpot." Spike thought to himself and followed her immediately.
"So, where do we go? Yours cabin or mine, mister Spike?"
"I don't even know where is mine to be honest. And you can seriously drop 'mister', Charming."
"My place then, Spike." She smiled. And then she stopped. "Can we go to sauna?"
That was sudden.
"Now?" Asked Spike.
"I have never been to sauna before..." Her goo goo eyes made it hard to refuse. Too hard.
Spike opened door for her and they went inside.
***
It was one of these high temperature - low humidity saunas, so popular in Fillyland, Canida and Hooviet Union. Narrow passage in the middle of the room with stone stove at the end. On both sides there were benches climbing up, so the last row was near the ceiling. Charming was lying on second row, while Spike sat on the last one, where the temperature was highest. It wasn't really affecting him, after all lava is a little hotter than that.
They were inside for about five minutes.
"This is boring. Let's go, Spike." Charming stood up and started walking towards the door, Spike followed her. But door opened before they reached them.
"Not so fast, Risk."
"Oh, yeah, I've totally forgotten about these guys."
Charming took a step back. Judging from the look on her face the hypothesis that they were her bodyguards wasn't really an option anymore. Two thugs were now inside.
"You thought, that we will not find you? That you can just run away? You were wrong, you bitch!"
"And if you behave then maybe we won't kill you too." Second one said to Spike and poked him in the chest with his broken leg. Well, not really poked, because leg never reached Spike's chest. And it was broken recently. By Spike.
Terrible scream filled the sauna as the first one fell to the floor. Judging from blood this was open fracture.
Second pony was quick to react. He immediately turned around, stood on his front legs and readied to kick Spike's head.
Spike wasn't interested in waiting for that to happen. He pushed pony's hind legs up, so he had to balance not to fall forward, and hit him in his chest with powerful right straight. He crashed through some benches and stopped on the wall.
Judging from deformed chest and one of the eyes not being in the eye socket anymore he wasn't going to wake up.
"You will get nothing out of me!" But Spike wasn't interested in interrogating somepony, that was trying to get in the way of him getting laid. Most hideous of crimes. "I'll kill you, you son of a...!" Three legged pony didn't have luxury of finishing his last sentence, because dagger provided him with additional hole in his head. Or rather hole through his head.
Spike turned around and looked at scared mare that was behind him. "This is boring. Let's go, Charming."
***
Charming Risk cuddled up to Spike. "That was amazing."
They were lying in bed, in Charming's cabin. Spike lighted up a cigarette with his flame. "You are amazing, sweet thing." He took a drag. "I didn't want to spoil the mood earlier, but I think that there is a little story that you want to tell me."
Charming remained silent for a while. "I guess I owe you an explanation..."
Rays of morning sun were piercing curtains, trying to illuminate particular small cabin of certain enormous airship. This meant that its maiden voyage was soon going to an end.
Spike puffed his cigarette. It was going to be another day of hard work, and this time most likely properly hard. Not drink-all-the-alcohol-and-end-up-with-beautiful-mare-for-the-night kind of hard.
But that could wait.
He stroked Charming's beautiful red mane and looked at her. She was sleeping peacefully with head on his torso, Spike felt her calm, rhythmic breath. He admired her beauty for several more moments.
"I guess everypony has a story..." He said to himself and let out a sight before taking another drag on his cigarette.
And this red-maned yellow earth pony had one hell of a story.
It required guts and serious deficiency in brain department to steal money from mafia. Stalliongrad's mafia was particularly bad choice. And Vengeful Fortune was probably the most cruel one of all the Stalliongrad's dons - definitely not the one to let something like this slip.
No wonder she was grateful to the Doctor, if he helped her in such situation. But this meant that this mysterious Doctor was not only rich, but also influential. Someone respected in the underground world. Or feared, which basically meant the same thing.
"No use in thinking about it now." He thought to himself and finished his cigarette before closing his eyes and trying to catch some more z's.
***
Sounds of fireworks and cheering crowd interrupted Spike's, not long enough anyway, sleep. This could mean only one thing - they arrived in Manehattan.
"We should get going." Spike said to Charming when she opened her eyes.
"Just five more minutes..." Her sleepy, little absent voice was clear evidence, that Spike wasn't the only one that got not enough sleep.
***
Spike was going downstairs, Red maned mare was closely behind him.
They were the only ones around. One could find it weird, that no one else was getting off from this huge passenger airship. Spike didn't. He had this weird hunch it was somewhat related to Charming's forty minutes long visit in bathroom. What mares do in bathrooms for such long periods of time is one of the greatest mysteries of ponykind. Or at least for the male part of the society.
"Damn it, I'd kill for 3 more hours of sleep." Spike thought to himself when they reached the ground. A long yawn followed that though. "Or minutes."
"I think that's our carriage." Charming spoke from behind.
Spike looked. Indeed, there was carriage waiting. Black, with dark windows, about ten meters long and harnessed by six stallions. That's some rich bastard for you. But he didn't waste time speculating Doctor's financial situation, he needed to follow in yellow mare's hoofsteps.
They quickly approached the carriage, because apparently Charming was in hurry all of sudden. Spike almost had to run. In tuxedo. And he doesn't like running in tuxedo. Not classy.
"Good morning, miss Risk. How was the flight?" Asked one of the stallions.
"Is that our guest?" Another one asked without waiting for answer to the first question.
"Good morning, guys! Flight was good, thank you, and yes, this is our guest. Mister Spike The Dragon."
"Good morning, sir." All six of them greeted Spike and nodded. Add their almost identical looks and you have definition of creepy right there.
"Morning." Answered Spike while squinting his eyes. This sun is killing me, how come we don't have sunglasses in our equipment?
But there was no use in thinking about that, because one of the stallions already opened door for Charming and him. He also helped Charming get in. Spike followed her and soon they were sitting in really luxurious carriage.
They were surrounded by expensive materials: several kinds of wood, mostly ebony, gems, silk. If it was fancy and expensive there was a good chance you would find it in this carriage. But the first thing Spike noticed was a liquor cabinet.
"Now this is what I'm talking about!" He said with a much brighter look on his face. "Do you think Doctor won't mind?"
"Please, feel free. It is guests' carriage after all." Replied Charming.
"Want me to mix you something?" Spike asked when he started to look through the bottles, looking for the one to make his day more bearable.
"I'm good, thank you."
But Spike's quest wasn't easy, as content of this liquor cabinet was contrasting with splendor of the carriage. There wasn't even single bottle of booze, that could be considered as a good one (by Spike's standards), and even considering these with questionable quality (again, by Spike's standards) there wasn't much of a choice either. After long contemplation Spike decided, that glass of Johnny Trotter was his best bet. Even though he didn't really like whiskey.
Spike left the liquor cabinet, or rather cabinet of disappointment, alone and sat opposite Charming. He took a sip out of his glass, it reminded him why he doesn't really like whiskey.
Conversation with Charming wasn't an option either - she has already fallen asleep.
"This is going to be a very long journey." Spike said to himself.
He looked at his glass with amber liquor inside. To his surprise it was starting to slide out from his hand and he wasn't able to do much about it.
Then the scent of whiskey gave way to another one, one that Spike knew was trouble.
The sweet scent of chloroform.
Crystal glass broke on the floor of carriage as Spike lost his consciousness.
***
Spike woke up in new, alien reality. In harsh reality, where his glass of whiskey was gone and there was nothing to replace it.
Also he was chained to the wall and could barely move.
He looked around. The room was rather spacious: about 20 meters wide square, at least 3 meters from floor to the ceiling. It was almost completely empty, apart from torches that were trying to compensate for the lack of windows. It felt more like a cave than a room.
Judging from the cold walls made from solid stone this was probably the case.
Spike looked at the chains. Pretty solid ones indeed. He tried to tear them out, but with no success. It wouldn't be a problem of course if he could melt them with his fire breath. But metal collar was pretty much blocking his throat. It was hard to just breath, breathing fire was out of question. Someone did his homework properly.
Then Spike realized, that someone else was in this room, or rather was still in this room, as he was leaving. "Could you bring me glass of Lunar Shine?! I could really use a glass of Lunar Shine right about now!"
But leaving pony, apparently Spike's guard, ignored his mocking and disappeared in the doorway without a word.
"Great." Spike's situation wasn't looking bright. Captured, defenseless, no way to escape for now. They will probably try to torture things out from him. Upcoming hours were going to be unpleasant.
That's when another figure appeared in doorway. A figure that quickly approached Spike.
White unicorn with white mane. His cutie mark appeared to be an empty flask. His whiteness was already disturbing, and red eye color wasn't really helping. Using his head as a means of transport for his cat didn't either. And his cat was also white. White persian.
Spike wondered, who would turn more heads on crowded Canterlot promenade: he or this fine individual.
Unicorn stopped about three meters in front of Spike. His cat got up and started to rub against his horn.
"Well, well, well... What an honor!" His cat was still rubbing against his horn. "Spike The Dragon, codename 'S'. One of the elite 'one letter' Celestia's secret agents, arguably the best one in entire Equestria's secret service. The one assigned to protect the apple of the eye of our beloved princess herself..." Cat was circling around his horn, few times even stepping on his eyeball. But it didn't seem to affect him. "I didn't expect Celestia to gave me such credit... Good thing I fried this stupid nephew of hers."
"This just can't be a bad person."
"If it wasn't for your thing for mares and weakness for alcohol you would be perfect agent, mister The Dragon." Cat on his head was now big, fluffy ball of static electricity, and with every rub was getting more and more powerful.
"What a dickhead."
"But this doesn't really matter now, mister The Dragon. You're probably wondering why." He started walking in circle. "I'm sure you wonder why. But fret not, I'll tell you why."
"Boss!" Brown stallion galloped into the room and quickly approached Doctor. "We don't have much time before SHIT!" He was interrupted by rather big static electricity discharge. And then his scorched face was attacked by a cat.
It took few seconds, but the cat finally stopped his furious assault and returned to his owners head, where it began cleaning its now not so white fur.
"What was that you were saying?" Doctor asked, now rather miserable looking, brown stallion.
"Eruption..." Painful grimace was showing how much his scratched face really hurts.
"Eruption what?"
"Soon..."
"Ah, right." Doctor left his subordinate to lie on the floor and faced Spike again. "So where was I...?"
"It seems that you know much about me, but I'm afraid I don't know much about you." Spike took advantage of the pause. "So what about telling me your name for starters?"
A smirk appeared on Doctor's face. "Nope."
Since when villains are not idiots anymore? This will make Spike's work much more difficult.
"Doctor Nope." White unicorn added after dramatic pause.
Well, looks like everything is normal in the land of Equestria.
"So, Doctor Nope, you were about to tell me something?"
"I was indeed, mister Spike." Doctor was about to continue but he was interrupted again. This time by a small earthquake. But it really didn't bother him too much, when last pieces of debris fell to the ground he started again. "So as I suspected, you are curious as to why your supreme skills won't matter?" He looked at Spike, anticipation all over his face.
Spike raised his left eyebrow. "...Why won't my supreme skills matter?"
"Because you'll DIE!!! MUAHAHAHAHA!!!" Doctor broke out in maniacal laughter. His cat had to grab onto his horn not to fall down. After few seconds the unicorn stopped and cat could carry on with cleaning his fur. "You don't seem to be surprised, mister The Dragon."
"I must admit, I kind of saw that coming." Answered Spike.
"Oh..." This clearly saddened Doctor. He looked on the ground and kicked some debries with his front leg.
"But I'm sure you've prepared some special way to kill me." Spike comforted him. Villains have tendency to kill their foes in fancy ways. These are great opportunities to escape, most of the time.
"That's right!" Smirk appeared on Nope's face again. "I bet you don't know how I'll kill you!"
"I don't." Agreed Spike.
"It took me a while. I was thinking about acid bath, but it is so last year. Some time later I've read this article about lasers in 'Villain's Journal', but I know I can do so much better than just cutting somepody in half with laser!" Doctor was speaking with such passion, that one could clearly see that he takes his job very seriously. "So I kept looking... and then - it hit me! Of course, it wasn't easy. I had to plan this carefully, build this whole facility here. Even then, I thought it will all be in vain, but I managed to pull few strings, so some ponies 'forgotten' abut rain in Ponyville, thus creating need for a downpour. Perfect for my main plan."
"Ponyville? So he's most likely after Twilight after all... The question is how much does he know...?
"Everything was finally going smoothly. That is until Blueblood showed up." Angry grimace appeared on Doctor's face. "Kill Blueblood? Celestia is sending him on suicide missions whenever she has opportunity to!... I wouldn't do her such a favor, not in a thousand years!" Now he presented to Spike new expression - evilish grin. "But lucky me, after I've got rid of that crock you've showed up. And just in time to experience my masterpiece."
In that moment another pony galloped into the room. Gray earth pony looked rather stressed out. "Boss! We need to go! Volcano is going to erupt soon!"
Doctor's grin faded. He didn't turn around to face his subordinate, instead he kicked him in face with hind leg. Hard. "YOU FUCKING IDIOT! YOU'VE SPOILED EVERYTHING!" Doctor was breathing heavily. "I was just going to tell him about volcano!"
"Aah sohhy, poss." Hard kicks to the face can severely affect diction.
"Volcano?" Spike couldn't believe what he heard.
"Ahh, yes, YES!" Doctor was quickly transitioning from maniacal anger to maniacal joy. Or just being a maniac, which he enjoyed. Very much. "Freaking VOLCANO! I bet you didn't expect that! I've built this facility in a volcano that is going to erupt today! Everything you see will be flooded by lava! You'll die burned to ashes by magma!" After that he enjoyed himself some more in maniacal laughter.
Spike was pretty shocked. He had to agree - this was much more than most villains would do to kill him. And he couldn't bring himself to tell this pony in front of him, that dragons can pretty much swim in lava and this isn't best approach to kill him. It would break Doctor's heart.
And of course it would ruin his chances to have an easy escape.
"Well, looks like I'm doomed." Said Spike. Doctor almost started to jump around in joy.
"Yes, yes you are!"
"But what are you planning to do in Ponyville? Villain of your caliber should attack some big metropolis, not a small village like that." Spike noticed that flattery seemed to be working good on this one.
"I'm not interested in attacking Ponyville, I just want to kill Twilight Sparkle. Just think about it, this bitch Celestia will be furious, if I kill her precious, little pupil." Looked like simply thinking about it droved him into state of ecstasy.
"You do realize, that this is not going to happen?"
"And why is that?" Doctor even stopped smiling.
"Like you've said, Twilight Sparkle is Princess Celestia's pupil as well as a bearer of one of the Elements of Harmony." Spike kept the 'future princess' part to himself. After all there is a chance that Doctor Nope doesn't know about this little fact, and the less he knows the better. "When you sum these up you don't have to be good in mathematics to..."
"I'm good in math!" Doctor burst out, most likely offended by mere suggestion.
"But you don't have to be, to know that she is one of the most protected ponies in Equestria."
Doctor grinned again. "But you are no longer by her side."
"While that is certainly true, there will be plenty of other agents to stop you. You must be mad if you think that you will be able to get close to her."
Doctor just laughed out loud. "You really think, that I want to get close to her? Then it is you who must be mad! Ha!" Doctor paused for a moment. "You must be curious why?"
Spike haven't said a word. Which was enough of an answer for doctor.
"It is because I can kill her FROM DISTANCE! Do you think I approach Blueblood? I would NOT make such sacrifice."
"Makes sense." Avoiding Blueblood was something that Spike could familiarize with. "How then?"
"With lightning, duh!"
Spike knew, there was one flaw with this plan. But he didn't intended on sharing it with his host.
"And don't worry, some magical lighting rod won't be a problem."
Or maybe there wasn't one. "But I wonder... How are you able to control lightning bolts?" Asked Spike.
Doctor's eyes lit up. "Let me show you!" Six other ponies entered the room. It was getting pretty crowdy in there. "Perfect timing guys! Bring the lightning-bolt-inator here!" Doctor ordered before any of them could speak.
"But we need to go now boss..." This tough looking stallion wasn't even trying to hide his fear. Which made Doctor pretty angry.
"The sooner you bring the lighting-bolt-inator here, the sooner we will go." Silent nods were the only answer. "You there, help them."
Stallions, one by one left the room. One of them had some problems, but even he managed to. With that the only ones left in the room were Spike and Doctor. And a cat that was not amused all of sudden.
"Oh, what is it Void? Are you hungry?" Doctor asked. He must have taken cat's total lack of response as an answer. "Don't worry, daddy will get you something to eat..."
With that Spike was left alone in the room.
***
"Careful, you idiot! It is a delicate equipment!" Doctor hit one of his subordinates.
"S-sorry, boss!" Gray stallion barely maintained his balance.
"Put it here, here!" He ordered. Moments later peculiar looking machine was placed before him. It was resembling piano, but there was no piano keyboard. Instead there were many switches and levers on the whole front side of this thing. "Feast your eyes on this beauty! This switch is for controlling..."
"I can't see anything when it's this far away." Spike interrupted Doctor.
"Why did you put it so far away from our guest, you imbeciles!" Doctor scolded his subordinates. "You heard him, he can't see anything!"
Without a word Doctor's subordinates moved the machine closer to Spike. It was now about ten meters away.
"Is this OK?" Asked Doctor.
"Little closer." Answered Spike.
Seven meters.
"Now?"
"Just a little closer."
5 meters away.
"How about now?" Asked Doctor.
Spike knew this might be his best chance. He focused as hard as he could, inhaled and used his fire breath. Pain in his throat was almost unbearable, but that was not important. Green flames shoot out from his mouth and lighting-bolt-inator was destroyed instantly.
Spike coughed up some blood. But it was worth it. "That's close enough, thank you."
In that moment two spells hit Spike. He was defenseless, if it wasn't for his dragon skin he would be dead already. But thanks to his thick scales this just hurt as hell.
Good thing it stopped quickly.
"What do you think are doing, you idiots!" Yelled Doctor. Spike opened his eyes and saw Doctor's subordinates looking at their leader with fear in their eyes. Some of them were knocked down. "You almost ruined everything! He must die in volcano eruption, you imbeciles!" Doctor have been breathing heavily for few moments, then turned to Spike. "Are you okay?"
"Yeah, I think I'll live long enough for volcano to kill me."
"That's a relief. Sadly, I cannot show you how lighting-bolt-inator works, now that you destroyed it."
"I'm sorry about that." He wasn't. "I coughed, it happens sometimes. Looks like you'll have to kill Twilight some other time."
"Oh, don't worry I'll just take the spare inator."
Spike jaw dropped.
"Waaait... that was the spare one, the first one is broken..." Doctor said to himself. "Well, whatever, I'll take the third one."
"What the..." Spike's jaw was still hanging low. Just who is this mad pony?
"Anyway, mister Spike, I shall take my leave. Please, make sure to die in magma. Farewell." With that Doctor nodded and left the room, his subordinates followed him.
And Spike just looked at the door. This is probably the maddest foe he ever faced. And sadly, it looks like there is a method in his madness.
***
The room has shaken again. Some debris fell to the floor.
Spike opened his eyes and looked around. Nothing has changed since the last time his nap was interrupted.
He didn't know how many hours did pass since Doctor Nope left with his subordinates. Probably few hours.
He was getting hungry. Even worse - he noticed hunger, even with his whole body hurting. Time was definitely working against him.
"I wouldn't mind, if this freaking volcano erupted already..." He thought to himself, before closing his eyes again.
***
"Spike! Wake up!"
"Five more minutes, Twi..." His chains were too comfy to just wake up right away.
"We need to run, Spike!"
With a click of the lock Spike's hand was free. This was enough to wake him up totally.
"What are you doing here, Charming?! Volcano is going to blow soon!"
"I'm rescuing you, thanks for asking." Spike's collar was opened and with that burst of green flame was enough to release his second hand.
It wasn't most graceful landing he ever performed, but at least he didn't landed on his face. "You shouldn't have come back, this is dangerous!"
"And that is why I should have let you die here? Besides this volcano haven't erupted for such a long time, why would it..."
"STOP TALKING!" Spike interrupted her, but shaking of the ground and sounds of rumbling were clear sign: it was already too late. "You ponies know so little about life..."
Charming didn't answer that, she just placed Spike on her back and started to run.
***
Spike had to admit, Charming's knowledge of Doctor's hideout was really helpful. Swimming in the lava through those corridors without even knowing where to go would be a pain. On the other hand now they had to outrun said lava, which, also, was kind of a pain.
He was massaging his throat. Burning down lighting-bolt-inator was rather painful, as were the spells Spike was hit with afterwards. But for now Spike knew, that he needs his fire breath as soon as possible. After all for dragons their fire is the source of their magic. And it looked like some magic might come in handy pretty damn soon.
***
Charming jumped to the left to avoid the boulder that fell to the floor.
She stopped, breathing heavily. Tears formed in the corners of her eyes.
The way was blocked.
Spike jumped off from her back and looked around. His throat was still hurting a little, but there was no time left.
"Hide behind that boulder and lie low." He commanded Charming and went onwards few steps.
He looked at the place where wall meets with ceiling. Somewhere up there must be surface. Or at least should be. He decided that. So there was only one thing left to do.
Spike took a deep breath. "Here goes!" He thought before breathing out fire.
Thanks to his magic wall gave in quickly, vaporizing under the tongues of green flames.
After few seconds Spike fell on one of his knees, he even had to support himself with one hand. It sure was exhausting, but Luna's moon visible through the hole was the proof of his success. Moon?
Time sure flies by when you have fun.
"What...? How...?" Charming looked rather puzzled.
Spike wanted to say something, but at the end of corridor he saw the lava approaching.
Time was running out.
There was no way for Charming to run up through the hole. It was far too steep, and also far too hot.
Spike took out his sword and shrank it down. Now it resembled letter opener more than a weapon. Spike gave it to Charming. "Could you please take care of this for me? Send it to Ponyville later."
"What? Why?"
But Spike wasn't going to waste time explaining. Instead he took another breath and breathed out fire at Charming.
She gasped, and closed her eyes.
After moment she gathered enough courage to open her eyes. She looked surprised to not be burned to ashes. Instead she was surrounded by weird looking, greenish bubble.
"This should be enough to protect you from the fall." Spike was breathing heavily.
"Protect me from what?!"
Lava was now really close. "I hope we'll see each other again, miss Charming Risk. It was pleasure to meet you." He kissed her hoof.
And before she had time to reply he grabbed her, took a swing and threw her through the hole.
"SPIIIIIIIIIIIIKE!!!"
He just smiled to himself. "That was smooth."
Lava hit him pretty hard. He instantly lost his footing and fell down, hitting his head in the process.
Everything was spinning round, partially from the hit to his head and exhaustion, partially because lava's current was literally spinning his body.
Then his back hit the rubble that was blocking their path earlier. It helped with spinning, but added to hurting head.
"That must've ruined my tuxedo." In fact there was none of that left. These things are surprisingly flammable in contact with magma. "No time to feel sorry for yourself, Spike! He thought to himself. He had to get back to that hole if he wanted to get out of this alive.
Strong current wasn't exactly helping him with this, neither were his injuries. But slowly he was getting closer and closer.
He could almost grab the edge of the hole when another shock took place.
Whole ceiling collapsed on Spike, submerging and hitting him hard.
He tried to swim forward, but this was in vain.
"Damn... Sorry, Twi..." Was his last thought, before consciousness faded away.
Spike opened his eyes, but it didn't change much. Everything was pitch black.
He decided to use his flame as light source, but that didn't help much either.
Adding that to his last memory being drowning in lava... It was looking rather bad.
"Greetings, Spike The Dragon."
"Princess Luna?"
"Indeed, it is I." Dark blue alicorn appeared before Spike, dim light coming out of her horn was just enough to illuminate her and Spike.
Few moments of awkward silence have passed, before Spike decided to speak up. "So, princess... Am I dreaming or have I died?"
"Sadly, I do not possess such knowledge, Spike." Luna replied.
"You don't?"
"You see, my mentor used to say that dream and death are like twin brothers. It isn't within my power to tell them apart within this realm."
"Well, that's a shame, I guess." Said Spike. "So, why did you come to see me here? Were you worried about me?" Mocking princess wasn't a really good idea, but Spike wasn't always all about good ideas.
"Actually I wanted to talk about this pervy dream of yours. You know, the one with Rarity."
For few moments only silence was filling the air.
It was Luna who broke it. "You know, the one with..."
"I get your point, I'm sorry, princess." Who would have thought, that dragon's scales can be this red.
"I'm glad to hear that. Let us get to your report hastily, we do not know how much time we've got."
***
"And now they're heading to Ponyville and Twilight Sparkle is their target." Spike finished his report to princess Luna.
"So this is how it is!"
"Yes, princess. Please, pass these informations to princess Celestia as soon as you can."
"I will, fret not." Luna stopped for a moment. "But isn't there something else... some other message you would like me to convey?"
Luna's words sent shivers down Spike's spine. Indeed... this might be his last chance to say something to his friends.
"There's so much I would like to say..."
"I've seen many ponies with this problem. We tend to say so little, yet when our time comes we'd like to say so much..."
"You know, princess. I'm... or I was a secret agent, I kinda had to keep many things just for myself."
"That's true, Spike. But don't be so negative, it isn't certain, that it is indeed your time."
"I sure hope so." Spike stopped for a moment to gather his thoughts. "I have a question... Will my friends know about my... service for the crown?"
"It won't be openly announced. But you will have a funeral with honors as an officer of Equestria's army, so I don't think Twilight Sparkle and her friends will have any doubts."
"I see... Well then... please tell Twilight that I'm sorry. I think she will understand, that I couldn't tell her everything. Tell her, that I'm sorry for leaving her side so soon. But she finally has found some good friends, I think she will be fine." He smiled. "Tell Shining Armor to find a good replacement for me, or I'll haunt him. And tell Derpy, that I'm sorry I didn't repay the debt. And one more thing: tell your sister, that I'm thankful for everything she did for me." Spike took deep breath. Hopefully he didn't forget anything.
"Are you sure this is all you want to say?"
"Well, of course not, but it sums it up pretty good."
"Don't you want to say something to somepony else?" Continued princess.
"Well... I'm sorry for your welcome back party, princess. I got little carried away..."
"Rarity?" Interrupted Luna.
This clearly saddened Spike. "What good would that bring? It is better to leave her oblivious, it will be better for her."
"In moment like this you can be little egoistic." Said Luna. "And guessing from her dreams she might be little less oblivious, than you might think, Spike."
Spike thought this over for few seconds. "I knew that... you know, that it might come to this... so I've written letters for all of my friends." He smiled slightly. "It was a pain to keep these up to date... Anyway, I've written two letters for Rarity. I wanted Twilight to decide, if Rarity should receive the second one. But maybe, princess, you're the one that should decide. Would you mind doing that for me?"
"You do realize, that I'll just give it to her, right?" Asked Luna.
"I do. I wouldn't ask otherwise." Spike and Luna shared a laugh.
Not for long though. Bright light appeared behind Spike.
"What's going on?" He asked.
"Looks like it isn't your time after all, Spike The Dragon." Luna smiled. "By the way, don't worry about what happened when we were celebrating my return. It was all in good fun."
Spike didn't have time to respond. He felt strange pulling sensation and everything vanished.
It was almost like he went right back to the realm of dreams. But this time he was hurting all over and was hungry, so there was a good chance he was awake and alive.
Of course being dead and burning in hell was also a possibility, especially with his lifestyle choices, but with current evidence there couldn't be any definitive answers. Not yet.
Spike was lying on his back, or at least he felt like that was the case. It was so dark, that even his dragon eyes weren't helping.
He decided that standing up was taking top place on his to-do list.
He didn't succeed the first time. Spike couldn't move at all, something was holding him. He decided the best solution will be to try again - this time harder. As they say, if at first you don't succeed, brute force. Brute force makes wonders.
"I have no idea where I'm now..." Spike began to analyze his situation. "But it looks like after all I wasn't squashed to death and I didn't drown. So at the very least I've got that going for me, which is nice.
He was now standing. Problem was, he didn't know where. He couldn't reach ceiling, which with his height taken into consideration wasn't that weird. The air surrounding him was still, which wasn't good news. There might be no connection to the outside. And that meant his air supply might be limited. But without light source he might as well sit and wait to die.
So he took a deep breath and breathed out small green fireball, size of his fist. But instead of flying straight, like a normal old fashion fireball, it started circling around him, illuminating his surroundings.
It looked like somehow he ended up in some other corridor of the facility, one that wasn't entirely flooded when volcano erupted.
He was really tired, hungry and pretty much beat, but lying down and waiting for death would be way too boring. So he started to look for a good place to create another exit.
"Guess there is no time for break for this dragon."
***
"This should be good enough." Spike said to himself.
He managed to get up several floors, but it was dead end after all. And that was something that Spike was going to change in a minute.
He looked at the wall in front of him and inhaled, focusing his fire. But effects weren't too impressive, as he started coughing.
There was no one to hear Spike's swear afterwards, and even if there was, it was drowned out by yellowish magical beam, that missed Spike by few meters.
"That's new." Thought Spike. He had an idea who could've casted such a powerful spell, that pierced whole mountain.
Moments later yellow figure emerged from the smoke. "I was looking for you."
"I know." Spike replied.
"You look hungry, would you like a banana?"
***
Enormous banana drifted around one of the corners of Manehattan suburbs with frantic speed, kicking up clouds of dust and destroying somepony's mailbox in the process.
Inside Spike was consuming regular-sized banana, next to Princess Celestia in her bizarre banana outfit. Apparently Dragonfly was now renamed to Bananamobile, and as such was driven by Banana-mare herself.
Spike took out his spare tuxedo from glove box. Q, that old pony really knows him well.
***
Spike looked at his reflection in side mirror. He straightened his bow tie and conjured moustache. And he even managed to do it all before the side mirror was lost, due to some reckless tree growing too close to Dragonfly.
"C, you do realize we don't have to fly so close to the ground, right?" Asked Spike.
Celestia had to evade orange cart while drifting through another corner, which resulted in destroyed fence. On the bright side the front of Dragonfly was damaged too, which reverted some of the bananamobile conversion.
"Banana-mare works in mysterious ways." She replied.
"And I guess Banana-mare realizes, that flying higher would get us to Twilight faster, right?"
Wind noise and whiz of Dragonfly's engine were the only sounds breaking the silence for a few moments. That is apart from the yelling of ponies, that were nearly killed or had their property damaged.
"Point taken."
Dragonfly shoot up almost vertically before speeding up in direction of Ponyville.
***
Dark, stormy clouds obscured the skies over Ponyville, big raindrops were hitting Dragonfly's windshield. They were hitting Princess Celestia as well, because she didn't fit behind the windshield. She didn't seem to mind though.
Spike was looking for Doctor Nope, or rather for his Lighting-bolt-inator.
"OK, C. We need some kind of plan." He stopped for a moment. Celestia didn't say anything, so Spike continued. "Doctor Nope looked like pretty potent mage. His subordinates also looked like a decent bunch of fighters. But that shouldn't be much of a problem." Spike stopped for a moment and looked at Princess once again. She appeared to be focused. "Of course they would be dead within thirty seconds if we were to fight them fair and square, but this is not going to be the case. His target is Twilight, and we must take into account that she is practically his hostage as long as Lighting-bolt-inator is operational. Of course, Twilight being herself, she probably will be reading books in library, so there is little chance to hit her directly. But we can't take any risk."
Lighting bolt, that hit few hundred meters from Dragonfly interrupted Spike. He looked around and quickly spotted suspicious looking group of ponies not so far from them. They had something resembling piano with them. "Bingo!"
"Ok, C. There they are. We should use element of surprise and snipe them from abo-"
"OK! LET'S DO THIS!" Princess Celestia was already on the hood of Dragonfly. "BANANAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!" Spike grabbed something in last the moment, before Celestia launched herself to the ground, leaving Dragonfly spinning. "MAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARE!!!"
"Should have seen that one coming." Spike thought to himself while moving over to Dragonfly's controls.
It took few seconds, but he managed to stabilize the craft. But it was still falling rapidly. Ground was closer with each passing second, too close. Even with engine in full reverse there was no chance to stop. And at this point there was no chance to change Dragonfly's trajectory. He was in for a crash landing.
"This is precisely why I can't have nice things."
***
Dragonfly took the beating surprisingly well. It was still in one piece. Smoking and rattling, but singular piece. Spike's body also preserved unity, and that was great news, considering he'll need all his limbs for what was coming. He could've do without bump on his head and split eyebrow though. But since when some blood in his eye was a problem?
Spike assessed the situation: he was about a kilometer away from Princess Celestia, Doctor Nope and his soldiers, and of course the Lighting-bolt-inator.
And it looked like almost everyone was focused on Princess. Perfect opportunity for destroying that wicked machine (and Doctor's plans with it), which Spike decided to seize.
He started to run on all fours. While he doesn't really like it running like that it is the fastest way of running for him. And of course he wanted to get there as soon as he could. Crash landing wasn't exactly the stealthiest kind of landing, it was bound to grab somepony's attention.
And that was the case indeed. Spike noticed that one of the ponies in the back saw him and alarmed the others. But he already covered about a hundred meters.
Eight ponies started galloping to Lighting-bolt-inator, majority (including Doctor) was still attacking Princess Celestia.
Seven hundred meters left.
Eight ponies will be easy to kill, but they will have to wait patiently for their turn. Lighting-bolt-inator is going down first.
Five hundred meters.
But these ponies didn't face Spike, well, at least not all of them. They gathered around the inator, facing outside, and started some incantations.
Three hundred.
Spike wasn't going to wait any longer, the machine was in his range (be it barely). He fired three fire balls while still running.
It looked like the incantation wasn't going to change anything, but the octagonal barrier formed in the almost last possible moment. The fireballs were deflected, first two were sent into the skies, third one on the other hand hit handful of Doctor's soldiers before hitting the ground and killing another dozen.
With the barrier formed Spike had to adjust his plans a little. He turned a little and got to Doctor's underlings before they could realize what happened.
He was done running on all fours, and there were at least three good reasons for that. First of all, he wanted to make use of his claws, and standing on his legs made it considerably easier. Second: at short distances he was more than quick enough.
And perhaps most important of all: he felt way cooler this way.
Gray stallion wasn't admiring Spike's coolness though, as he was staring in awe at his comrade, as this poor bastard's internal organs were falling to the ground. Being the next one on Spike's list wasn't something he considered cool.
He saw the purple dragon approach him, he saw claws closing in on his throat. But his body was unable to move. And to be fair, he wouldn't be able to avoid the blow anyway.
Spike sank his claws into this unfortunate stallion's throat and threw him over his head and to the ground. That way he died because of broken neck before he had chance to bleed to death. Or was it because of skull fracture?
It wasn't something that would preoccupy Spike. He looked around for Princess while shaking off gray corpse from his right hand.
There she was, standing in the middle, taking a beating.
"What the hell is she thinking?!"
It didn't took Spike long to get to the Princess, which was pretty unfortunate for the ponies that happened to be standing on his way.
"The hell you're thinking?!" He shouted after casting shield spell, so the beams won't burn her any further. "...Princess."
She looked around to make sure there was no one around (and ignored that there were plenty ponies around), lowered her head as well as her voice and spoke to Spike. "I don't have my costume."
"Excuse me?"
"You know, -" She lowered her voice even more. "- my Banana-mare costume. It burned off when I used Banana Beam. That's my new attack."
"And this explains why you don't defend yourself how exactly?"
"Fighting is not feminine enough activity for a Princess of Equestria." She explained calmly.
"You're depressed because of your costume?"
"Yeah..." She looked at her hooves. "Sorry, S. You'll have to do this without me, I'm not really in the mood."
"No problem." He cracked his knuckles. "Give me 3 minutes."
***
Two minutes and thirty seven seconds later Spike shook off some blood from his claws and looked toward octagonal barrier. Inside there was 9 more enemies to deal with, and from the look on their faces being dealt with was definitely something they would like to avoid (although Doctor Nope didn't seem to notice, he was fiddling with Lighting-bolt-inator). Something that was quite understandable, considering they've witnessed massacre during last three minutes.
"Let's see..." Spike said to himself as he approached the barrier. "FUCK!" He narrowly dodged his own fireball, after it was reflected by the barrier. "Should have seen that one coming..."
"Are we done yet?"
"No Princess, We must first deal with Nope..."
"But... but... three minutes!" She looked at him, full of reproach.
"I know, and I'm sorry, but we've got to deal with them."
"Yeah, fine, whatever."
"Muahahaha! DIE Twilight Sparkle!" Doctor Nope laughed maniacally as he pressed button.
