An unexpected visitor damaging her garden, Wallflower resolves to do the obvious thing about it.
Undeserving or not, there are a lot of things that had been denied to Wallflower. So when a stray kitten wanders into her garden, she will do everything she can to pet it, and make amends with herself in the process. As a treat.
A friendship in three acts, and mediums.
An aggressively SoL story, and mostly self-indulgent. Whatever that means.
My eternal gratitude to the sweetheart that is SleeplessBeholder for both generously providing the cover art AND also for proofreading the story. Would be a hot mess otherwise. The source for the picture in chapter 3 is linked in the cover art. Fun fact, it was originally the cover art that I clumsily put together because im a hack lol.
The flower bed of daffodils has been trampled entirely. Their petals scattered, just like with most of the daisies. And lots of holes dug around. The petunia’s petals have been torn from them, as well as from the rosemary plants. All around, this was a vicious attack.
I was furious at first. Then realized I had no right to be. These are the consequences of my actions. And even then I think I got off easy.
It has been two days since the destruction of the Memory Stone. Sunset and her friends recovered their memories, and everything has come back to normal. Or almost. I’m being more noticed now, but for all the wrong reasons. I’m sure word has gotten around about what I did to them, and how I’m a monster for hurting Sunset Shimmer. Which is not so far from the truth. Can't even look at her in the eyes, even though I want to. This was probably karmic justice for what I did. Or just an act of revenge from any student. Guess this is what it must have been like for Sunset.
She forgave me and promised to introduce me to some friends that shared the same interests as me, but honestly? It probably would be for the best if she doesn’t keep her word. I don’t really trust myself to not hurt those around me. I would rather surround myself with those I can actually tend to and take proper care of, plants.
That’s why I will start writing entries here, or logs of some sorts. Keep tabs on the plants' growth or progress, once they have recovered. It could be interesting. On the meantime, at least I get to indulge myself a little bit here, and have an outlet to say stupid things not out loud for a change. Sunset did this a lot apparently, when she spent her time scribbling in that weird journal of hers. It wouldn’t hurt to try. Perhaps that helped her become the Good Guy (girl) again somehow. While it probably won’t help me, if Sunset did that, it means it must be good. Just like her.
But that’s something for another entry. Scratch that, definitely not. My plant reports are more interesting anyway.
I sure hope nobody reads this.
Anyway. I may be deserving of the attack, but they (my plants) are not. If you damage them, you damage me. So, I am gonna catch the culprit(s). Too much care has gone into them for me to let this happen. And so many memories attached too, like that one time a teacher forgot to add me to the attendance register so I just kinda got up and walked out of the class. Just so I could spend more time in my garden, and feel less alone. That’s why, quoting something I heard in a cartoon show I watched as a little girl, I will, in the name of the hydrangeas, punish the culprit!
I really really hope nobody reads this.
Entry Number Two
Okay so this is BIG. Something amazing happened. The most exciting thing that has happened to me in the last two days. This completely changed things.
So I was lurking around the garden trying to see if anyone would show up this time, maybe even catch the attacker on the act, when I heard these weird sounds and the noise of rustling from the bushes. Then something emerged from them; A tiny ball of sunshine that materialized before my eyes and melted my heart.
A stray kitten!
It was so small and a shade of a warmth radiating orange with these stripes on its head and back. Wide emerald eyes sparkling with curiosity while surveying its surroundings, and gosh it looked like the softest and most playfullest thing ever.
The moment I saw him in all his fluffy and scruffy glory, I knew I was ready to make him my new hyperfixation.
Somehow I know it’s a him, don’t ask why. The weird sounds were actually him trying to puke or something. He looked sick. It clicked for me, the plants weren’t attacked by anyone on purpose. The tear signs from some leaves resembled bites. The kitten probably wandered into the garden and saw the flowers as appetizing. Makes sense.
See, if I was normal I would be normal about this. But being me I can’t help but feel excited and fascinated about a cat. It’s not everyday when I get to see a kitten up close. Bunnies, dogs, yeah sure. But there is something special about cats for me. I was always curious about them and always wanted to have one, scratch it, hold it… normal pet stuff you know. I was never allowed to have any pets at home, anything that would take more responsibility than a potted plant.
There is a funny story about that, actually. When I was eight years old, I asked my Mom if we could bring a kitten home. She chastised me as if I had asked her if I could ride a motorcycle, telling me I couldn’t even take care of a plastic plant and how she would have to take full responsibility over it instead of me. And so, on Mother’s Day, I gifted her a real sunflower. I had been growing and nurturing it since then (I also had to read about it in the library and ask in the flower shop). The gift lasted 3 days before withering. That’s where my love for gardening was born though! I also continued this tradition, out of spite mostly.
I didn’t even think twice. Carefully and silently, I began to approach him without him noticing thanks to my involuntary trained social ninja skills. When I was within petting range, I extended my hand. I was nervous, I didn’t know how he would react and how I would react at the touch of his velvet-like fur. Not like I had the chance to revel in the feeling, as upon contact, he got really startled. His body got up in a weird position as he spun towards me hissing, swiftly scratching my wrist with his tiny and soft paw before stepping back in a rather intimidating position.
I almost smiled at that. He was so cute, I would die for him! And he would be the cause of death, too.
But didn't want to scare him any further. So I took my leave in defeat and left him alone for the day. It was too good to be true, that everything would go alright. Probably will never see him again either. Oh well. I will bring food next time, just in case.
Entry Number Three
So, good and bad news. The good news is that for some reason the kitten has taken a liking to roaming around my garden. It tends to be a very quiet and lonely place so I can see why. The bad news is that none of my attempts to get him to warm up to me since yesterday have worked. He won’t eat anything I give to him. And that is provided that it won’t scatter away at my sight. At least he acknowledges my presence, I guess.
At this point I decided I may have no choice but to do something I wanted to avoid from the beginning. Talking to someone. Or specifically, talking to one of Sunset’s friends. She’s like some animal guru who surely knows how to go about this. Her name is Fluttershy. Of course I won’t approach her out of the blue in person to ask her how I can pet a kitten I found in the school’s garden, that would be awkward and weird. That’s why I will do that via MyStable, which will still be awkward and weird but I won’t have to see her reaction in real time.
She was there when I voided Sunset’s mind with the memory stone. That’s not the kind of stuff that can be forgotten so easily, ironically. It’s probably too soon for her to even pretend to be friendly with me. Everytime I try to message her, a force of 100 horsepower makes me put my phone down. Social media, Scary!
Even then, I can’t help but feel this is something I have to do. I have been trying to avoid Sunset’s group since then, even when they were understanding of me trying to essentially murder their friend over my own, self destructive habits. I will have to confront the aftermath of what happened, sooner or later. I owe them that much. Besides, it’s Fluttershy. The epitome of kindness and shyness here in the school. That’s what they say at least. And we do have that latter trait in common! This kitten could be a valid reason for us to bond together, too. Two friends for the price of one. Right?
Am I… Excited at the idea of talking to someone? Maybe this diary thing is not so bad after all.
Throughout all my life, there’s a lot that has been denied to me. Feeling like I could never have nice things and deservedly so. But I want to have this. As small and dumb as it may be.
It's likely I will screw this up, as always. But no matter my crippling anxiety, societal expectations, the consequences of my past actions, or my mother. I AM going to pet this kitten.
Wallflower_BToday at 17:45 PM Hey. Apologies in advance if I'm bothering you or something. I know how weird this is, messaging you out of the blue like that. I searched for your MyStable account (In a non stalker manner) and here I am.
Wallflower_BToday at 17:47 PM writing to you because I need help with something, so if you have a couple of minutes to help. And if you don't, that's okay, too.
Wallflower_BToday at 17:54 PM Sorry for bothering you. This was a bad idea.
FluttershyToday at 18:01 PM I'm so so sorry. I was very busy at the animal shelter. I didn't mean to ignore you. Sorry.
Wallflower_BToday at 18:02 PM fair. Hope I’m not bothering you though. I rarely use this account. Let alone for social purposes.
FluttershyToday at 18:02 PM You are not bothering me at all! Please don't feel bad.
I'm glad I finally got to talk to you Wallflower. I was meaning to approach you since the incident, as you mostly had kept for yourself. Are you doing well? And I will be happy to help with anything I can!
Wallflower_BToday at 18:03 PM You know a lot about animals right?
FluttershyToday at 18:03 PM I.. well, yes, I guess you could say that!
Wallflower_BToday at 18:04 PM So, there's this kitten. I found him recently in my garden, at the school. And he had been eating some of my plants.
FluttershyToday at 18:04 PM Awww, poor thing, he must have been starving.
Wallflower_BToday at 18:04 PM I want to pet him. Badly so. But I have no experience with cats. Every time I get close he lashes out. Any advice you can give?
FluttershyToday at 18:05 PM YES OF COURSE I CAN Sorry, caps. Okay Wallflower, so
Stray kittens can be really shy and skittish when it comes to human contact.
I’d recommend starting slow. Just sit near the kitten when it’s outside and let it get used to your presence. You could also try gently tossing some yummy treats at him, that could attract it closer to you. Let him initiate the contact, he will warm up to you in their own time.
Wallflower_BToday at 18:06 PM I see.
FluttershyToday at 18:06 PM Do you know how old he is, give or take? Are you sure it's a male? Does he look healthy? Any pics you can send me? :3
Wallflower_BToday at 18:06 PM Uhhh I'm not really sure. I have a gut feeling, mostly. He didn't seem to be okay after eating my plants though. All I know is that he reacts with hostility. Can rabies be infected via scratching? Because that would be bad...
FluttershyToday at 18:06 PM Oh That sounds bad :/
Wallflower_BToday at 18:07 PM I need to get the rabies shot then. Great.
FluttershyToday at 18:07 PM Actually it’s very rare for cats to carry rabies, and it has a low risk of being transmitted through claws and not bites. You will be fine. But I lament that the kitten may have been abused in the past. Maybe from a previous owner, or a passerby. It lacks trust.
Wallflower_BToday at 18:07 PM That 's... awful.
FluttershyToday at 18:07 PM Some people can be awful indeed. I can always come by to take it to the shelter, ensure he gets the care and home he deserves. Maybe it can be your home. If you are up for it.
Wallflower_BToday at 18:08 PM Oh no. Nonononono. My house wouldn't be a suitable place for a cat. And that's too much responsibility for me. I'm very sorry but that can't be.
FluttershyToday at 18:08 PM No worries, I understand.
Wallflower_BToday at 18:08 PM Also, I would prefer it if I could take it to you. To the animal shelter, I mean. Usually I would take the easy way out but, I want to learn during this process. And manage to finally touch a cat.
FluttershyToday at 18:09 PM That's valid. I for one think everyone should touch a cat at least once. It's good for your health. If you don't count the fleas, that is.
Wallflower_BToday at 18:09 PM You mean in the same sense as touching grass? Because I have done that. A lot. And it hasn't helped my case.
But yes, I think this can help me. Somehow.
FluttershyToday at 18:09 PM I know this may look daunting. You are not sure you can do this. But, if you follow my instructions, by the end of this week you WILL pet a cat! So you can bring it to me to get it adoption ready for you :3
Wallflower_BToday at 18:10 PM I don't think I'm ready for that yet. As a reminder.
FluttershyToday at 18:10 PM Just you wait until you are holding him in your arms. You will change your mind. Everyone does >:)
Wallflower_BToday at 18:12 PM Aaaaaaaaa too much pressure
So, where do I start?
FluttershyToday at 18:20 PM Sorry, went for a snack. First, you will need to gain his trust so he eventually warms up to you. For cats, the fastest way to their hearts is through their stomach. Start by leaving him cat gummies or actual food.
Wallflower_BToday at 18:21 PM Okay. I think there's some Tuna cans in my fridge.
FluttershyToday at 18:21 PM Wait No Tuna. Canned food can be potentially harmful to them.
Wallflower_BToday at 18:21 PM How about milk then? I'm certain cats love it.
FluttershyToday at 18:21 PM That's a common misconception about cats. In reality their stomachs tend to not like it.
Wallflower_BToday at 18:22 PM So what do they even eat???
FluttershyToday at 18:22 PM Meat. And fish. Preferably cooked. Oh, and some of them go crazy over corn, you can try that.
Wallflower_BToday at 18:24 PM Mmm. I have some corn laying around.
Wallflower_BToday at 18:56 PM You won't believe it. I left the corn in my garden and watched behind the bushes. The kitten went absolutely gremlin mode over it. It was the most precious thing.
FluttershyToday at 19:01 PM That's most delightful to hear! Keep leaving food and soon enough he will associate you with it.
Wallflower_BToday at 19:01 PM Will do!
February 27, 2018
Wallflower_BToday at 16:25 PM Okay, im at the garden and he hasn’t bolted from my sight so far. What do i do now??
FluttershyToday at 16:27 PM Stay calm. Can you make him more comfortable with your presence?
Wallflower_BToday at 16:27 PM Is this a trick question?
Wallflower_BToday at 16:27 PM Hes sprawled all over the grass. And hes looking at me lazily as if daring me to come closer
FluttershyToday at 16:27 PM Avoid direct eye contact. And Remain still. Cats are very curious animals so he will approach you sooner or later, but don’t reach out to him yet. Crouch and lower your body as much as possible so as not to appear intimidating to the kitten. Speak to him softly, make him feel secure.
Wallflower_BToday at 16:28 PM How, if I can’t even feel secure with myself?
FluttershyToday at 16:31 PM I'm sorry.
Wallflower_BToday at 16:31 PM No it 's okay. I was just doing a self deprecatory bit. Sorry. Huh, this feels… good to say. Like not actually meaning it. Is this what it feels like? Sorry. I didn’t mean to vent.
FluttershyToday at 16:31 PM That’s okay, I don’t mind. I’m here for anything you need, Wallflower.
Wallflower_BToday at 16:33 PM Umm anyway, to become one with the floor. Got it.
FluttershyToday at 16:33 PM Not necessarily so low. Just sitting on the ground will do.
Wallflower_BToday at 16:47 PM He’s walking towards me. It works! I wonder. What if I called you and passed you over to the kitten. Would your geode work?
FluttershyToday at 16:48 PM It probably would. But most likely it would make him retreat if you moved, so best not to. Just be patient. You are almost there!
Wallflower_BToday at 16:51 PM GOSH he's clawing at my trousers He wants my attention so bad Can I give it to him ?
FluttershyToday at 16:51 PM You must resist Wallfower let him knead at your lap a little more This is a good sign :)
Wallflower_BToday at 16:51 PM Now it’s walking over my leg and towards my face. He’s examining me and stretching and doing cat stuff. It’s so hard not to pet it right now, ugh. It took some sniffs at me and scattered away. Aw.
FluttershyToday at 16:52 PM But he got close to you, didn’t he? That means he has warmed up to you already. So fast! Congratulations, you should be proud of yourself.
Oh, by the way, I have seen some of the (few) posts you have done here in MyStable. I really like your cottagecore content. I dig it, even. ;)
Wallflower_BToday at 16:53 PM Pffffff Thank you. Kindly. This may be dumb but I’m glad I did this you know? I may take a shower now. It’s been days since I last did that. Anyway, talk to you later!
FluttershyToday at 16:53 PM Toodles!
February 28, 2018
WallflowerToday at 19:35 PM FLUTTERSHY I NEED YOUR HELP SOMETHING BAD HAS HAPPENED
“I must admit, Wallflower, that when I received that message from you, I was prepared for the worst.”
⠀ “Okay, I know maybe I overreacted. But you should have seen Trixie’s reaction when he latched onto her leg and wouldn’t let go. It was actually quite hilarious, now that I think about it.”
⠀
“Well, he is one healthy little kitten from what I have seen, so it will all remain an adorable scare. And a small wound on her knee. What was she doing in your garden anyway?”
⠀ “I think she was vaping? Who would have thought cats could be this territorial?”
⠀
“Turns out he really likes you. I can tell even without my magic.”
⠀
“Your gut feeling about the kitten being a ‘he’ was right by the way. I just checked that.”
⠀ “Of course I was right! I have a good intuition. Sometimes.”
⠀
“Unfortunately, what I initially feared turned out to be true. There are telltale signs of physical abuse. And from what he told me, from a former owner.”
⠀ “How could anyone do something like that? I don’t understand. It sickens me.”
⠀
“Some people don’t care for cats at all. Others are just sadistic and violent, and will hurt any animal because they can.”
⠀ ⠀
“ I know I have asked you this, and I don’t want to be pushy. But is there any chance I can convince you of keeping him?
⠀ “I really don’t think that’s a good idea, Fluttershy. Don’t you have room in your shelter for him?”
⠀
“I do. The question is, do you have room in your heart?”
⠀ “That’s just emotional manipulation. And so cheesy.”
⠀
“Didn’t really mean to. But the question still stands.”
⠀ “That’s still a no from me.”
⠀
“But I don’t understand. why?”
⠀ “Maybe because of the time it took me to just pet it? Without being clawed into ribbons? What makes you think I could give him the care he deserves?”
⠀
“But you did it! This is not something that happens overnight, I should know.”
⠀ “I just don’t think I’m up for the task.”
⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀
“It has to do with what happened a week ago, doesn’t it Wallflower?
⠀ “Look, I know you girls forgave me, but I-”
⠀
“There’s a lot of bad people in the world with many bad reasons for doing things. Like abusing animals. But the fact that you care, genuinely, means you aren’t the bad person you think you are.”
⠀ “You don’t understand.”
⠀
“Look. It takes time to regain trust, and to heal emotional wounds. But things get better. One small step at a time. Or a cat treat, in some cases. And I consider you to be on the right path.”
⠀ “What do you mean?”
⠀
“Your heart’s in the right place, Wallflower. You extended the second opportunity you were given to save an abused soul. You are a good person. And you deserve happiness.”
⠀ “I don’t even deserve this kindness. Now I feel like I am in debt.”
⠀
“How about this then?”
⠀ ⠀ ⠀
“You can always pay me back in kind. By doing the right thing.”
⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀
“So, what do you say?”
⠀
⠀
Entry Number six
I told her I needed a bit of time to think about it. Truth be told, I wanted to have a moment for myself, while holding the kitten. Fluttershy assured me she would be waiting for me, and my new kitten at the animal shelter. And also that she would call over some friends to help me restore my garden. With that, she left. But not before taking a candid picture of me, and the kitten. I won’t forgive her for that (I told her to send it to me though. It could be of use for me later.).
I will never be able to thank her enough. For everything.
I’m supposed to be here, meditating upon my decision. It’s probably been at least two hours since she left. The sweet scent of the blossoming flowers of my garden, carried by the gentle breeze of the evening; The kitten lying on my lap, purring at the rhythm of my scratches on his back. He’s nibbling my other hand, softly. Even without the sun, I could still go on.
As it darkens, this sense of peace and tranquility is washing over me. Almost enough to make me tear up. It’s weird, because I don’t know if I will ever have something like this again. I know I never had. While I made up my mind already, I wish this could last forever.
Even then, I really look forward to tomorrow. For once.
I was so high on this strange warm feeling, that things could get better, that I got the courage to do something to live up to that notion. The notification sound from my phone reminded me of the picture Fluttershy took me with the kitten. She had sent it to me already. I could break the ice between Sunset and me, and I knew exactly how. So I opened MyStable, looked up her profile, mustered up courage and did what could have been considered impossible a few days ago.
⠀
Wallflower_BToday at 21:35 PM Look at what new treasure I found in my garden!
SunShimToday at 21:36 PM Awwwwwwww Fluttershy told me already You two are so cute together!
Wallflower_BToday at 21:36 PM jkgfdjfdhighj Sorry, the cat walked over my keyboard.
SunShimToday at 21:36 PM Didn’t you just take this picture with your phone?
Wallflower_BToday at 21:36 PM YRHGHBVFYTFYTFYT
⠀ I put down the phone for a few hours, to wait for the butterflies in my stomach to die out. Who could have thought social media could be this exciting?
As much as I wanted to stay for longer, it was getting late. I was hungry, and I’m sure the kitten was too. So I picked him up, gently just how Fluttershy taught me, and prepared to head home. First stop, the animal shelter. Fluttershy would be excited to know I made the right choice. And also to run an extensive health check on him, probably. Before any of that, there was something I was missing. There was something I had to do first, before taking that step. An oath if you may. I couldn’t take care of him.
“If you end up coming into my house, and into the mess that is my life, can you make a promise to me?”
Not without giving myself that same treatment, too.
