Trying to get these wonderful ideas out of my head and down for everyone to read...
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My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
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Upvoted for " Princess Twinkie Starbutt McNewWings".
4069170
You peeps are CRAZY! Throw me a tiny bone of a picture, and look at what we did...
Crazy, I tell you!
If there is one thing Twilight does, it is care.
I see you used the Derpibooru comments. I know I recognize the one I wrote.
In any case, fantastic work, hilarious and touching by turns. Thank you for it.
Somebody get her an immortal special somepony stat... This is not a drill, repeat this is not a drill... Whee woo whee woo...
Cursing was a bit much but eh what the hell do I know...
I'll give the mare she was talking to some credit. In that she retained bladder control as a recently flaming alicorn basically gave her a talk that could've come from the Doctor. And nice touch at the end.
This isn't the usual 'Pony gets smashed and cusses all around' sort of doggerel I've seen. Those tend to be just excuses to make whoever's involved act as OOC as they think is amusing. This does have something behind it.
4069941
It started just as a joke, but after I put it together, I was reminded of a line from "Monty Python and the Holy Grail," referring to the Castle Anthrax scenes; when the actors broke characterization and started describing the scenes as, "...just a string of p***y jokes..."
As Cely said, "That ain't fair."
It needed more. So, I got to thinking...how would Twilight react if her teacher and friend, her heart breaking and in so much pain from loneliness, react if a Manehattenite, with their so well known superiority, decide to kick her while she was down...
"Feeling Pinkie Keen"...and Twilight Rapidash...with wings...and Princess...
Yeah...that works.
4071178
It IS a bit much...as I said, this started as a joke, a reaction post from military bronies, but things changed between the joke, and this...
I imagined a Princess, a Demigoddess, who is doing such an astounding thing as raising and lowering the SUN, having such importance in this world that EVERYPONY runs to her for advice and consent, having to be SO CORRECT about everything, so incredibly frustrated (SPOILERS) at being treated like fragile cut glass, or rubbed like Aladdin's Lamp for wishes, like she says in the story, when she also has needs and wants like every other mare, (or woman) in the world...how does she deal with it? Especially as she gets drunk?
She cusses. A LOT...
But she does know how to pick a wingmare...
Crystalheart
4071614
Well, she IS a Manehattenite, after all...or she had just been in the loo...
Thanks for the positives
Oh gosh. Something like this surely would come out of Semper Silly. Very well written though!
-Sage
4083515
Yeah, we get stupid sometimes. This was a perfect example.
Those of us that have ever been on a barcrawl have friends that just have had it so stressful, they decide to just let it all go, and as they get loaded, they get more obnoxious and stupid. But if you have your wits about you, sometimes, you hear the why behind the idiocy. Twilight heard the why that day. And Twi being Twi, she decided to do something about it.
My kind of friend.
Thanks for the read, and the comment.
Crystalheart
I finally cracked up at 'Toothpastemane up in Shiny City' although 'Princess Twinkie Starbutt McNewWings' came a close second. 'Including the Cider' came third.
Heh, as soon as you let go of what Celestia is 'supposed' to sound like and embrace the way over the top swearing it becomes a great little character study of the two alicorns.
Well done, well done.
5413369
If you look further down in the comments, another reader also noted how this wasn't just characters being played against type. That there were REASONS behind all the swearing. Celestia's loneliness and frustration of having to be the "super-y duper-y, (to quote Pinky), super special Princess" everypony expects her to be 24/7/365, (or whatever it is). That there is no time or place for her just to be Celestia. That was what I was driving at.
Thanks for the read, and the kind words!
Crystalheart
5415569
Which is exactly what I got from it. Hence the fav
LOL! I was cracking before this, but this, this right here! I freaking LOST it!!
P.S Twi is best pony and now Best Princess!!
7510817
Most everypony reading those words have that response...
Looks like I did my job...
Crystalheart
7510884 You did your job and then some pal!!
Seriously? In the bucking story description? I'm tempted to downvote just for this.
*you're
I'm more than a little worried about Twi's calm acceptence of Celestia's attempted suffocation.
This ... is already a trainwreck. It just hasn't finished crashing yet.
How do you get the kittens to ... nope, not going to finish that one.
I did not know who she meant until here.
Random cardboard NPC with a death wish. OK.
I'm not sure that counts as small, since it's pretty clear that Equestria doesn't run on the same laws of physics as Earth.
We do? Since when?
Overall ... I give it a meh. I get the stated reasons for the breakdown, but I just couldn't suspend enough disbelief to enjoy it.
8152863
You're entitled to your opinion...
But I didn't write it for you, or any of the three who downvoted...
It's for the fifty...
Crystalheart
I honestly wonder if the drama or sad tags could be added to this. Granted, it's primarily comedy, but you did a VERY good job of conveying Celestia's despair.
8173099
I needed a hook...
Otherwise, like the Monty Python troupe said about the Castle Anthrax, "It's just a string of p*ssy jokes..."
Too many have written Celestia as an oversexed mare, on the make for anypony. I wanted something different...
So, I got to thinking. Here's The Princess of Benevolent Days...she's banished her sister, taken over both Sun and Moon, running a country, (I tend to think of the Diarchy as at least Demigoddesses; whatever you may think about raising Sun and Moon and what happened in the evolution of the planet before the Alicorns took over the job, she's doing it now for an entire planet)...
And suddenly, her hopes are realized. Luna is back. So, she draws a foreleg over her brow to wipe away the sweat, says "Whew!", and with the release of at least part of the burden, she thinks about taking some time just for her...
And she seems young enough, (for her), to think of romance, release, and finding a contemporary partner. Even though she would eventually reach the Arwen and Aragorn moment, she would be happy...if only for a short time in her long life...
Suddenly, this is a much better story. It's not a joke string; it's a real event that could have happened in her life. Being "...out of time..." as the world and its events start moving ahead of her, she tries to live that moment in her life. To be loved, cared for as Celestia; the mare that hates mornings despite her role, that breaks up the monotony of immortality by playing practical jokes on her Guards, that worries over Twilight and the rest of 'her little ponies'...
Thank You for your interest. I am very glad I gave you the entertainment you wanted when you chose my story...the most precious thing you have in your life is your time, and that I gave you good value for it...
Crystalheart