A/N
This is a really short plot bunny. I fell in love with Derpy- well, I already liked her, but I checked the net for art of her, and saw angsty pictures on DeviantART, and my attention was drawn to muffins. So, I got two ideas for stories: one was a sad and angsty story (The Doctor disappears, Dinky is taken away by CPS, and Derpy fights to get her daughter back by proving she can take care of her without the Doctor) and one was a lighthearted muffin-related story.
This is the happy one. So, Derpy and Pinkie Pie get in a fight over whether Muffins are better than Cupcakes (no, not THAT Cupcakes!). It’s all light-hearted. Please enjoy!
End A/N
/x/x/x/
ApplejackPOV
/x/x/x/
“Muffins!” the wall-eyed Pegasus cried, leaning on the counter at Sugarcube Corner.
“Cupcakes!” the pink earth pony yelled back, leaning on the same counter full of cakes and various other baked goods.
“No, Muffins!”
“Nuh-uh, Cupcakes!”
“I said Muffins are better!”
“No, Cupcakes are a bajillion times better!”
I seriously have to stop this, and now. They’ve been arguin’ for five minutes now, and they’re startin’ a scene. I cleared my throat, hopin’ they’d hear me, but they didn’t, and continued with this fight of theirs. It’s gratin’ on my nerves, so I put my hoof in my mouth and whistled real loud-like, just so I could get myself heard.
That got their attention.
“Hi, Applejack!” Pinkie turned to me after I whistled. “I didn’t see you there. What are you getting?”
“Well, I was just gonna buy a couple o‘ cupcakes for Apple Bloom’s sleepover with her friends in their treehouse, but that can wait a few minutes. Is there a problem between you and-” I turned my head to greet Derpy. We exchanged ‘hello’s, and I focused back on Pinkie. I continued, “Your friend here?”
“Nope,” she nodded. “No problems here! We’re just having a pleasant discussion about how cupcakes are better than muffins.” Derpy coughed. “Wouldn’t you agree?”
“I guess it would depend on the time of day. Muffins, you eat at breakfast, and you eat cupcakes after supper or at birthday parties, right? Plus, muffins are usually full o’ fruit or spices or both, while cupcakes are pure cake or swirls with frosting on top. Ye can’t really compare the two.”
Suddenly, Pinkie and Derpy started to giggle. Why? Is it something I said?
“Oh Applejack, you poor naïve soul.” Miss Hooves put her hoof on my shoulder. “What do you bake them both in?”
“Umm… a muffin tin.” Pinkie pulled one out of the counter- wait, how’d she, where’d she- oh, whatever. I guess they have one thing in common. She set the tin on the counter surface.
“And Applejack, don’t you put paper in the holes before dropping the batter in?”
“Umm… I guess so.” She’s kinda right. I’ve made apple-cinnamon muffins before, and apple-cinnamon cupcakes, and now that I think of it, I don’t remember any difference while makin’ ‘em.
“Plus,” Pinkie Pie continued. “You can have sweet or savory muffins, and sweet or savory cupcakes. If you take a look at this chart here- thanks, Derpy.” I look to my left and she’s holdin’ a big chart with some pictures on it. Where did she…?
The grey Pegasus was holding a pointer to the first picture, which was of some muffins. Pinkie provided commentary for the presentation. “This is a muffin. Normally, muffins have some kind of fruit. There’s a banana-nut one, blueberry, and a cornbread muffin.” Does corn count as a fruit…? “But next to them, are some that are a bit unconventional, and some even that are my creation. A chocolate muffin- with no frosting,”
Derpy interrupted her. “You don’t need more chocolate frosting if the cake’s already chocolate! That’s like…” she looked up, and her right eye spun around. It’s a bit… unnerving. Dangit, Twilight and her big words… Derpy cut my thoughts off by yelling “That’s too much chocolate!”
Pinkie facehoofed. “There’s no such thing as too much chocolate!” she shouted. “Anyways, chocolate isn’t a fruit. Well, it comes from a bean, which is a plant, and fruits are plants…” she took a marker out of her hair- don’t ask me- and scribbled that one out. “Bottom line is, muffins don’t have icing. I rest my case.”
“My turn!” Derpy cried. She moved her pointer to the second picture, which were some cupcakes. “Okay, here are some cupcakes. Usually, they’re made of cake. There’s chocolate, and vanilla, and yellow, and red velvet, and carrot, and…” she faltered- Dangit, Twilight!- at my stare…
“Umm… okay, there’s a bunch of cakes used in cupcakes. And you can put on different icing, like chocolate, or vanilla, or cream cheese, or… um… anyways, there’s too many different combinations. It’s too confusing! And when you lick off all the frosting, it’s all flat and blechy. Muffins get all puffy at the top, and they’re so delicious! I rest MY case.”
“So,” Pinkie started to say. Then, simul- I mean, at the same time- they both said, “So which do YOU think is better?”
I looked back and forth between the two. On the one hoof, Pinkie’s got a point, and I like frosting. On the other hoof, Miss Hooves has got a point, and I like muffin tops. Hmm… this is a hard choice…
Wait! I’ve made my decision!
“How about, you bake muffins, then cut the tops off, then put frosting on the bottom half, then put the muffin tops back on the top?”
Pinkie’s jaw was hangin’ open, and her eyes were wide. Derpy… had the same expression on her face, only, while her left eye focused on me, her right eye drifted off to the side a bit. Uh oh… Maybe that was a bit too- oh, nope, they’re blinkin’. They’re fine.
“That…” Pinkie said.
“Sounds…” Derpy said.
“Awesome!” the pony standin’ behind me yelled. Er, Dragon, it was Spike. “That’s a great idea, Applejack! Hey Pinkie Pie, can you make that?”
The pony standing behind him agreed, asking “If you do, can you make it a regular here? That sounds delicious!” and the other ponies around the shop started clamoring- uh, gathering- uh, coming up here by the counter, asking the same thing.
Pinkie and Derpy exchanged glances- er, looked at each other, then smiled.
“Yes, everypony!” Pinkie exclaimed- er, said- to the crowd. “I’m making my first batch right now! Fillies and Gentlecolts, starting in about an hour, I will present Ponyville’s very first…” she stopped, and started thinking about something. I moved out of the way of the crowd- how did so many ponies get in here, anyway? It was almost empty when I came in here…
Then, Derpy and Pinkie yelled two different things at the same time.
“Mupcakes!”
“Cuffins!”
They looked at each other in shock, gasping.
“Mupcakes!”
“Cuffins!”
“No, Mupcakes!”
“Nuh-uh, Cuffins!”
“I said Mupcakes are better!”
“Nuh-uh, Cuffins are a bajillion times better!”
I sighed… Looks like the cupcake muffins will have to wait…
/x/x/x/
A/N
So, how is it? Are Pinkie, Derpy, and AJ in-character? Et cetera. I’ve got no internet at the moment, so I wrote this on late Friday night. I guess I’ll hear from you readers whenever.
EDIT- Internet's back!
End A/N
Love it! You get a free Luna! dl.dropbox.com/u/31471793/FiMFiction/Luna_lolface.png
Derpy doesn't have a canon character, so she can't be out of character. Applejack..hard to judge, since her dialogue isn't even in quotation marks half the time. Pinkie Pie is in character just fine, because Pinkie Pie's character can include just about anything.
Also I want a cuffin now. Neither name sounds all that great, though they are the logical word structures. Mupcakes just make me think of tasting a mop.
Yes! I'm faving this! Liking it! Watching you! This story was amazing!
Wat. No, never mind. That was awesome.
GENIUS
I found the story entertaining. Because that is the sole reason I read on here, I will be awarding a thumb uppy thingy.
I didn't notice any major grammatical or spelling issues, other than the obvious term for a cupcake/muffin hybrid being a "Cuffincake" Am I allows to post links? Meh. I'll remove it if mods give me flak for it.
What was I talking about? Oh, right. The characters were decent and I could imagine a scene like this in the show. The story could be a bit longer and feels a tad rushed, but it's not a big deal for a story this short.
There were a couple things that bugged me , but I know that I'd never be able to create something as good, so I'll keep my mouth shut.
I could go on, but I'm starting to ramble and I want to go to bed.
I would definitely recommend it to someone looking to spend a few minutes reading without wanting a long or difficult read.
Edit: I spent twice as long writing this as I spent reading the story. I think something is wrong with me.
I had an idea for a fanfic titled "Muffins" where Derpy makes a "franken-pony" completely out of muffins and brings it to life. It was going to be the polar opposite of "Cupcakes" (pony kills another pony, makes cupcakes. Incredibly bloody and grimdark VS. pony brings another "pony" to life with muffins, incredibly goofy and random)
I want a mupcake, cuffin... whatever they are.
943880 I always wanted one of those!
943974 Ah, okay. I forgot the technicality of fanon characterisation. Did I at least get Applejack's thought processes right? Ultimately, I'd name them Muffcakes. But, they needed something to argue about... for a sequel with a grammar nut maybe?
944021>>944129>>944208 Thank you to all of you!
944266 Yes, I wanted to go for entertainment. And, I figured I might get opposition for my hybrid name. Yes, you can post links. I'm sorry it's short, I might make more debates between Pinkie and Derpy, and if I do, I'll make them longer.
944271 Unfortunately, I investigated the creepypastas to write an alternate ending for them all (I've got the first chapter up, if you're interested). But, your story idea sounds pretty interesting. Will you let me know if you publish it? Or, I could put you on my watchlist.
944285 I can't cook. But, I'm sure someone, somewhere, makes them.
AJ seemed to be channeling Twilight there.
Brilliant story. I totally want a Mupcake.
944606 As in the characterisation made her seem like Twilight, or is it a mutual joke about how her influence rubbed off?
944681 Thank you. As soon as I find one I can transmit virtually, I'll email it to you.
944712 Sweet.
You'd think that in the year 2012, we would have the technology to virtually transfer things.
944752
If you think that's funny, watch Back to the Future Part I.
944828 Oh man, don't remind me. That makes me want self lacing shoes, and hover boards.
Sorry though, I didn't give you my full thoughts on your story. It was very easy to read, which are my favorites. I also love how Applejack was trying to avoid using "fancy words", and I thought was a nice touch.
Most excellent.
On a technical note: While both muffins and cupcakes can share the creaming method when it comes to baking. Muffins, due to their crumb structure, are a quick bread, while cup cakes are, well cake batter baked in cups.
Did you know that cupcakes were original baked in cups in a fireplace?
--Thanks Good Eats.
944904 Thank you! I'm glad somepony noticed!
944982 First of all, love your username. Finding Beauty in Negative Spaces is one of my favorite albums of all time.
Second of all, I know there are a million different ways to cross them together. I was staying with generic muffins and cupcakes, but, thank you for your input.
No, I did not know that. But, I guess it kind of makes sense.
945114
Thanks, but to be honest I took this username for the evil pilot in Wing Commander 4. Everyone always thinks of the band though so I had to go listen to their stuff.
I wonder if you could just bake some muffin tops (they make pans for that) Then bake some cupcakes and use frosting to glue them together. The cupcakes would have to be trimmed or baked with flat tops(but that should be hard as long as your oven isn't too hot).
945194
...
encrypted-tbn3.google.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcRzezJ6Z7HvFCwsBniWYhEDpUDrryQBjMOD9T9IuoCrj3c3nFKG
So... umm... yeah.
That sounds like a decent recipe. Perhaps I'll explore the possibilities in a sequel?
YOU GET 12 Derpys FREE with the purchase of one Muffin. Deal ?
944712 A bit of both. Also, when AJ told Pinkie and Derpy her idea, it looked more like Twilight talk then AJ talk, eyup.
That was great. Applejack's Mupcake/Cuffin idea sounds absolutely delicious.
I MUST HAVE IT!
947626
Well... crap. To be honest, I only picked AJ because I needed a backstory as to why somepony needed cupcakes or muffins or whatever. I'll try to be more careful with that in the future. I don't have southern family, so I can never really nail that accent perfectly. Plus, I've got a major case of OCD and Asperger's Syndrome (aka autism) so I can't help but sound like a methodical person whenever I type anything to explain something. And whenever I try to force an accent, it comes off as offensive, annoying, or sometimes racist (accused of that once). Should I edit it, or leave it as it is?
953639
Okay, I'll go to culinary school for four years and then make one for you. Give me your name, email address, social security number, the deed to your house, the keys to your car, you PIN number, your credit card number, your wife, children, and pets, and offer yourself to me as a servant.
[this is a joke, not an attempted hack, don't give me any of the information]
THIS TOTALLY NEEDS TO BE AN EPSIODE
976667 If I had any skill at artistry, movie editing, character voices, or anything involving the whole thing, I'd probably make a YouTube episode of it. Up for grabs, if anyone wants to do it.
Derpy arguing with Pinkie Pie about cupcakes vs muffins... classic.
Holy crap, I am having a debate over this right now with my best friend! We are planning on(dont laugh at me now) founding an entirely new branch of science to the study of baked goods. Think about it, Confectionology, the study of all baked goods. This is a serious issue and needs to be addressed.