Adventures Are No Fun.

by AxalKay

Endings.

Doctor Lash explained puncture wounds should never be opened by removing the sharp object. He also explained bat ponies can heal their prey to presurve them for later. Lastly he explained Funny would have died if Screech had let go of him a few moments earlier. His wounds were less than half way healed.

In his office Doctor Lash said, "It would be very bad for you if word of this got out. Screech would surely be sent back to Luna's Home For Journying Children."

Cradle glared. "What do you want!"

"Screech. Her healing bite could help a lot of patients. Our spells and potions are fine. Her fangs can heal internal injuries in minutes. With her magic fangs and her natural talent for fixing things, under my guidance, she could be the best doctor in town."

"I will think about it," Cradle lied. "She is going through a lot and she is still a child. I don't like the idea of her seeng mangled ponies in an ICU."

------------------------------------------------------------

Screech cowered a few trots from the broom. She had not moved in three hours. A puddle of tears reflected her fear.

Cradle went to pickup Shcreech's wing. She didn't need to be a bat pony to know the low rattle snake like hiss was a warning. She left the wing and decided to pick up the broom.

Cradle didn't scream. Screeche's fangs punctered the bone in her leg, but she did not scream. She didn't want to upset Screech any further. Very calmly and evenly she said, "Screech, please remove your fangs from my leg. I know you are upset, but biting is not allowed in this house."

Screech slowly pulled her fangs from Cradle's leg.

"I am sorry I hit you. I panicked when I saw you bite Funny. I promise to trust you more. Can you promise you will not bite anymore?"

"No. Biting is part of how bat ponies comunicate. I have trouble communicating as it is."

"Screech, I need you to promise me no more biting."

"If I don't will you send me back to Luna's?"

"I am sorry but we may have to."

"I promise. No more biting."

Cradle smiled brightly. "I got you something while I was out." She showed Screech the local paper's headline. It said Screech saved the entire town from a rabies outbreak. The story did not mention the death of Mrs. McVey.

"You are a hero," said Cradle. "You will have more friends in Dodge than you ever had in Canterlot."

Screech nodded. "I only had one friend in Canterlot. It is hard to find unicorns who wanted Nightmare Moon to rule."

Cradle beamed. "You will have no trouble finding earthponies who are happy Princess Luna is back."

------------------------------------------------------------

Screech ran from her mother. She felt her body being torn apart. Chunks of flesh tore from her like pices from a 3-D puzzle.

She woke in a small dark room. Her room. She put on her sunglasses and prosthetic wing. She wrote a letter to Carver.

------------------------------------------------------------

Prey sat on the kitchen table. He wore a reflective orange vest.

"Do you like the vest?" asked Cradle. "Berry made it so you can see Prey during the day."

Screech nodded. Her mouth was full of oats.

"It's funny," said Periwinkle betwen bites. "A week ago I was afraid of racoons and loved dogs."

"Dogs are violent monstrosities," agreed Screech.

Funny smiled a wicked smile.

------------------------------------------------------------

The adults at Pinwheel's baby shower drank decaf and bad mouthed the father to be's family. Cradle and Periwinkle drank the coffee but refrained from the gossip.

Screech was excited to play with ponies her own age.

Swinger took one look at Screech and shouted, "Monster! A vampire pony has come to devour us all!"

Screech sat in the back yard with the teen age ponies. Seam sat beside her on the trampoline. Ledger and Twink were kissing on a lawn chair. Duckey balanced a soccer ball on each wing and strutted in a straight line.

Seam stroked one of Screeche's ears. She was surprisingly gentle for a pony with four face peircings and neck tattoo of an impaled heart.

"I hate parents," whispered Seam. "Claiming their kids will magicaly learn right form wrong just because they get older is like claiming apples will mature into oranges instead of giant piles of rot. I knew better when I was that age. You know better."

"I would have kicked the little pests' teeth in!" Ledger mimed kicking a child.

Twink giggled. "That would have been so hot. You are the coolest."

Seam insited, "Those kids are not being raised right. I was not raised right either." She showed off her forlegs. Under her fur was dozens of of small straight scars. "My hardships taught me empathy. Those kids are being taught to be public nuisances."

"I feel bad for them," Screech lied because she thought it was the adult thing to say. "I was lucky enough to have a smart caring mama."

Ducky stopped modeling for a moment. "Wasn't she a psycho who cut your wing off?"

Screech hissed. "That was an accident! Her spell missfired!"

Twink teased, "Little Duckey is going to get his butt kicked by child psycho."

Duckey scoffed. "Yeah. She is a child. I would not fight back."

"I would pay to see the little monster fight," Ledger looked at Screech. "I bet you could do some serious damage. I want to see you fight a timberwolf. That would be the coolest thing ever." He howled like a wolf.

Screech sniffled. She fought back tears. She tried to breath evenly. She sobbed and burst into tears.

------------------------------------------------------------

Pinwheel seemed happy her neice and the bat pony were leaving. She didn't want monsters around.

Seam led Screech down the street to her house. They sat on Seam's bed, but it felt different than sitting on the trampoline.

"Sorry about my cousins. They are always like that."

"I was not crying because of them," Screech lied badly.

"I know how to make you feel better," Seam proudly declared. She softly pressed her lips against Screeche's.

Screech pulled away. "What are you doing?"

Seam cocked her head and pretended to be confused. "Kissing you. When you scraped you knees didn't your mom kiss you to make you feel better?"

"Yes, but not like that."

"Ofcouse not. She is your mother. Trust me. Kissing will make you feel better." She stroaked Screeche's ear and softly kissed her.

After a few moments Screech pulled away. "Sorry. This is not making me feel better."

"You have to do it more." Seam leaned forward. Screech pushed her away.

Seam frowned. After a moment her face lit up. "I know why you are not feeling better. They hurt your heart. I need to kiss you chest to make you feel better."

"No!" Screech jumped off the bed. "I am sorry, but I want to go. I don't feel right. Your kissing is only making me feel worse."

Seam failed to hide her anger behind a smile. "Okay. Let's go back to the party."

"I am going home."

Seam sighed with relief. "Yes. You should go home."

------------------------------------------------------------

Screech was too lost in thought and churning emotions to notice her bedroom door was always open. Twelve muts greeted Screech the moment she opened her bedroom door.

------------------------------------------------------------

Funny yelled, "You make it sound like this is my fault!"

"This is your fault," scolded Cradle. "Screech was bred to kill dragons. What did you think would happen when you scared her?"

"I thought she would scream. No normal pony would tear twelve dogs into ribbons."

"Screech is not a normal pony. You can't treat her like a- you can't provoke her."

"She is dangerous! We can't handle her. You have to send her back," Funny pleaded.

"I won't!" Cradle slammed her hoof against the kitchen table. "I can't. She needs a mother."

"She needs other bat ponies. And a psycatrist."

"That is not funny!"

"I am not joking!"

Cradle frowned. "You are going to clean Screeche's room until it is spotless. Then you are going to wash the blood off your coat. Then you are going to appologize to Screech. Then you are going to tell our neighbours you could not handle their dogs. That a fight broke out and they killed eachoter. With any luck Mr. Nick will think one of these dogs killed Houdsly."

"How many dogs had Screech killed!"

"Two. One was rabbid. One was Houndsly. Ten fewer than you killed."

------------------------------------------------------------

Screech sat under the sun to dry her coat and mane. She took two baths and used an entire bottle of pear scented shampoo.

"You okay?" asked Berry.

Screech smiled. "Yeah. I feel a lot better now."

"Are you sure? I imagine killing all those dogs would haunt me for the rest of my days."

Screech was confused for a moment. Then she caught on. "I said I am fine. Can we talk about something else."

"Why do you walk around the house every night with that intence look on your face?"

Screech could not tell Berry that if she did not walk around the house seven times his father would never return. "I used to fly around Canterlot every night. I get nervous unless I search for dragons."

Berry went into the house. He returned a minute later. "Can you search with this?" he asked as he handed Screech a spyglass.

Screech looked through the spyglass. It didn't help. "I do feel a little more safe," she lied effortlessly. "Thanks."

From inside, Pereiwinkle scramed, "Why is Funny covered in blood!" A few moments later she ran outside and hugged Screech. "How could he do that to you after that rabbid dog attacked us? You must have been terrified. I am so sorry."

------------------------------------------------------------

Prey slept on Screeche's vampire bat plushy with half a cracker in his mouth.

Perriwinkle delicatly dabbed a small canvas with paint. Screech watched and delicatly drew on a sheet of paper with a crayon.

------------------------------------------------------------

Screech sat at the kitchen table. She slowly read her latest letter from Carver. She wanted to make it last.

Leaf kissed his wife.

Cradle beamed. "How was your trip?"

Leaf proudly declared, "It was marvelous. We will not have to worry about foreclosure any time soon." He handed Screech a small plastic yovidaphone. "How is the newest member of our little family doing?"

Screech hissed out of loyalty but her heart was not in it. "I am doing fine. I had a little trouble adjusting. I am having fun living in Dodge."

"I have a big big- knock your shoes off- big gift for you. I told some ponies in Manehatten about you. They put together a charity drive. In a few months you are getting a new prosthetic wing. Top of the line. I asked and submerging it in paint will destroy it. Nothing else will though. The whole family is going to Manehatten in four weeks so you can get a fitting."

Screech didn't hiss. She hugged Leaf.

------------------------------------------------------------

Screech smiled at Brass Lantern. He smiled back.

A lot of ponies in Dodge (still) had dogs. Brass was the only pony who walked his pet chicken on a leash. Screech was the only pony who walked her pet racoon on a leash.

The two young ponies chatted for a while. They both hated dogs, loved Nightmare Night, felt weird around Seam, thought unicorns were overrated, wanted to be alicorns, prefered warm oats to fancy food and never knew their fathers.

Even Prey and Qill (the chicken) were fast friends.

"I worry my mom is going to drink herself to death," confided Brass.

"I worry I will never see my mama again," said Screech. "Just knowing every day my mama is in jail is one less day I get to spend with her fills me with a desire to cry and kill things."

Brass nodded. "I understand what you mean. Who is your therapist?"

"Mrs. Berry. She is good at lisening to me and validating my feelings."

A cart down the street rolled backward. A colt screamed. Funny lay on the ground with his leg pinned under the cart's wheel.

Screech lifted the cart and Brass pulled Funny to safety.

Funny's leg bent in places it was not supposed to bend.

Screech bit Funny's leg. In minutes his leg was compleatly healed.

Funny beamed. "Thank Celestia you were here. I am going to tell every pony you are a hero."

Screech pinned Funny to the ground. She displayed her bloody fangs. "Tell one pony I bit you and what I did to the dogs will sound like a slap on the wrist."

Funny nodded to show he understood. He had a momentary lapse in judgement.

"Why were you behind a bread cart?" asked Brass.

Funny looked at Screeche's fangs. "I was making sure she does not kill any neighborhood dogs."

"I was the pony who killed the rabid dogs," said Screech with a hint of pride. "Now he has it in his head I am a monster."

"You killed fourteen dogs!" yelled Funny.

"I didn't realise the outbreak was that bad," said Brass with admiration.

------------------------------------------------------------

Screech spiraled and fell to the ground.

"Screech," called Periwinkle. "You should stop trying to fly before you hurt yourself."

Screech explained, "I have to fly above the clouds. It is a full moon and Nightmare Moon will not know her loyal bat ponies are awating her return if we don't fly above the clouds."

"Screech," said Berry. "Nightma-"

"I know!" Screech snapped. "I don't point out the flaws in your religion!"

"In a few months, when you have your new wing you can fly as high as you want," said Periwinkle. "If you keep trying to fly with that broken wing you are only going to hurt yourself."

"Thank you for the new information," Screech seethed.

Funny smiled wickedly. "If Screech hits her head hard enough she might see Princess Luna in a dream. Or her father in the after life."

Screeche's hooves pummled Funny's face. In only a few moments she knocked three of his teeth out.

Screech hissed as she was pinned to the ground by Periwinkle and Berry.

"What has gotten into you?" Periwinkle asked with concern.

Funny spit a mouth full of blood onto the ground. "I was born by chance and may or may not grow berries. She was bred to kill."

"Screech has moments," snapped Periwinkle. "She is not violent. She is not a murderer."

"She can't fly," Berry said thoughtfully. "Bat ponies need to fly. They get nervous unless they can look for dragons. She is scared."

Periwinkle smiled at the revelation. "Poor Screech. Funny, this is your fault for breaking her wing."

------------------------------------------------------------

Screech stood just behind Perrywinkle in the greenhouse.

"Have I ever told you, Dad built this greenhouse for me when I was six?" asked Periwinkle.

Screech wondered why her father didn't love her as much as Leaf loved his children.

"I was obsessed with flowers when I was a filly. Every pony thought my cutie mark was going to be a flower."

Periwinkle was strong. She could easily survive a few bites.

"I am happy my specal talent is painting. I am just as happy when I garden."

Screech felt a desire building in her. She wanted to steal Periwinkle's strenth. It grew to an impulse. She was certain that if she bit Periwinkle's flank all of her pain and suffering would vanish. One bite and she would be happy.

Periwinkle reflexivly bucked when Screech bit her. Luckily she didn't hit Screech. "What are you doing!"

Screech tackled Periwinkle. She easily took the adult earth pony to the ground. One bite was not enough.

"Get off me," Periwinkle commanded.

Screech bit just above Periwinkle's heart. She waited only a few moments before removing her fangs.

Periwinkle pushed Screech away.

Screech hissed and bared her fangs.

"Screech, get off me right now!"

Screech tried to bite Periwinkle's neck. She got her leg.

Periwinkle summoned all her strenth as an earth pony. She launched Screech three ponies away. She climbed to her hooves only to be tackled again.

Screech bit Periwinkle's hooves and legs. With each bite she felt more incontrol. Less alone. Less scared.

Periwinkle frantically swung her hooves. Her strikes had little force and made the pain radiating from her bite wounds worse.

------------------------------------------------------------

Periwinkle hobbled into her home covered in blood. She carried a barely conscious Screech on her back. "Mom, we had an accident."

Had Screech been an adult or had less of an aptitude for healing everthing she bit, Periwinkle would have died.

------------------------------------------------------------

Screech ran from her mother. She felt her body being torn apart. Chunks of flesh tore from her like pices from a 3-D puzzle.

She woke in a small dark room. Her room in Luna's Home For Journeying Children. She put on her glasses and looked for Prey. After a moment she rembered he was in Dodge. Luna's did not allow pets.

Screech put on her new prosthetic wing. It was exactly like her old wing was before Funny broke it. She hated the blue color even more now that she knew how it would look if it were pink.

She looked at her framed certificate of heroism. She hissed at the piece of paper that ruined her new life.

The last time Screech saw the Berrys the Department of Children, Youth, and Families promised to 'rescue' all of the Berry children. She only lived with the Berrys for one week and she managed to ruin their lives.

------------------------------------------------------------

I warned you at the beginning. Not all adventures have heroes. Not even the ones that need them most.

Author's Note:

I hope you are enjoying AANF (Adventures Are No Fun). This story was origally supposed to be just these four chapters, but my good friends A Random Casual Person (the creator of Adoabella) liked Screech so much I decided to continue writing about her. Although this was supposed to be the end of her adventure it is just the beginning. I hope you stick around to see Screech grow, learn and do cute things.