Asylum
Chapter 21
Twilight glared at the clock mounted above the door, and her scowl deepened. The arms on the clock shivered, as if considering whether or not to advance any further. There was a reluctant click as the minute hand jerked a notch to the side. With a snort, Twilight resumed her pacing.
“He’ll be here soon enough, Twi,” Applejack said around her pen, not looking up from the manilla folder that lay open on the counter before her.
“It’s not like my brother to be late,” said Twilight. “I remember how much he complained about the punishment for tardiness at the academy. They beat that into them, right after teaching them how to beat other ponies.”
“You ain’t gonna make him arrive any faster by wearing out the linoleum.”
With a huff, Twilight crossed her forelegs and planted herself in one of the chairs. Forcing herself to not stare at the clock, Twilight instead let her eyes roam around the room. There was precious little to see. It was a twin to the room where she had first met Rarity, with the welcome addition of a window to let in the late-morning sun.
Twilight brushed some of the dust off the non-descript table in the middle of the room and turned to regard her friend. “I don’t want to sound ungrateful, but are you going to stay in the room with us the entire time, or will I get some privacy with my brother?”
Applejack finally looked up and gave Twilight a strained smile. “I won’t be in your way, sugar. I’m just keepin’ you company till he gets here.”
You mean you can’t leave me alone and unsupervised, Twilight translated. Returning the smile with one of her own, Twilight made sure to adjust the mental list of questions she had prepared. No point in asking anything too incendiary while Applejack was still around. She fought down the urge to tap her hoof as she double- and triple-checked her list again.
Lulled into an introspective torpor by the ticking of the clock, Twilight only registered the sound of approaching hoofsteps when they came to a sudden halt outside the door. Two heavy knocks were enough to break her trance. Rising up from her seat as Applejack made her way to the door, Twilight moved to follow her, but found her hooves rooted to the floor. With the moment upon her, she found herself cowed by the sudden apprehension about just what the shadow could have done to her brother. Stay calm, Twilight. He might not be the Shining you remember. Be prepared for anything, and remember that this world is only temporary.
Trying to force some moisture into her dry mouth, Twilight could only watch silently as Applejack pulled open the door, hoping and dreading in equal measure.
“Hello, Doctor Applejack,” a warm and wonderfully familiar voice greeted her from just out of view.
“Glad you could make it, sergeant. There’s an excited filly in here that’s been pacing up a storm waitin’ for you to show up,” Applejack said as she stepped back from the door.
Twilight swallowed the rock in her throat, not even registering the embarrassed excuse Applejack received. Instead, her wide-eyed stare was locked on the door, her thoughts a jumbled mess of trepidation and fear.
Shining Armor stepped out from behind the door and turned to give Twilight a sheepish smile. “Hey, Twily. How is my favorite little sister feeling?”
The rest of Shining’s words were lost when Twilight nearly tackled the guardspony off his hooves. Not trusting herself to speak, Twilight just held onto her big brother tightly and closed her eyes. She basked in the memories of their childhood, the revelation that her brother had not been subjected to any of the nightmares she had imaged a greater relief than she wanted to admit. His voice, his scent, and even his warm presence were familiar enough to hold back the worm of doubt she felt whenever she was faced with something that seemed too good to be true. Instead, she felt like she was back home after a trying day at school, and her BBBFF was there with a playful grin and two mugs of hot cocoa–
A soft cough interrupted Twilight’s runaway nostalgia trip. She opened her eyes to find Shining and Applejack staring down at her with the bemused smiles of adults watching a foal do something both childish and endearing at the same time.
The realization that she was acting just like a clingy little filly was enough to send Twilight jumping back as if Shining had become electrified. She cleared her throat as she straightened up, ignoring the look that passed between the other two ponies. “Um, hello, Shining,” she said.
“You don’t need to be that formal with me, Twily.” Shining chuckled as he strode past Twilight, allowing the door to swing shut behind him. Lacking a helmet or armored barding, his dark-blue uniform was hauntingly familiar to what she had seen him wearing at the academy. Although Shining was carrying a few more inches around the waist then she remembered, nothing else seemed too much out of the ordinary. There were no obvious scars or disfiguring injuries. In light of what her friends had been subjected to, gaining a few pounds was a blessing.
Noticing her gaze, Shining chuckled again. “Sorry for the uniform. I didn’t have time to change after my patrol. Captain’s been running us pretty ragged.” His chair groaned beneath his bulk, matching his own sigh of relief. “I can’t wait to get home and kick off my shoes.”
“So, you’re not the captain?” asked Twilight as she moved over to the table and took her seat across from Shining.
“Not yet,” he replied with a confident grin that was as much for Applejack’s sake as her own. He leaned back in his seat. “But I’ve been told in private that I’m the favorite to take over for Donut Dunker once he finally retires. Evidently, the mayor herself was impressed by how I took down that group of changelings, and she’s been talking me up to the commissioner.”
“Well, sergeant, we’re all a little safer knowing we’ve got a bonafide hero walkin’ the streets at night,” said Applejack with a smirk, her clipped tone unable to hide the good-natured amusement in her eyes when she turned to look across the table at Twilight. “I know Twilight is proud to have a brave police officer as a brother.”
And there it is, just like Rarity said, thought Twilight. Not a Captain of the Royal Guard anymore, my brother’s stuck as just another lowly cop. In the shadow of lobotomies and burn scars, a simple demotion was a gift. Twilight forced a faint smile onto her face as she nodded along with Applejack’s words. Still, that can’t be all. The shadow isn’t that merciful.
“From what I hear, the mayor wants to give you an award for your help eradicating that changeling infestation we had a few months ago."
Shining shrugged. “I wouldn’t know much about that. I was just doing my job. After what happened to those patients, well, it’s not like I could just sit around doing nothing.” Reaching across the table, he gave Twilight’s hoof a squeeze. “Plus, I guess I had a bit more of a reason to get involved than others.”
Perking up, Twilight glanced up at the other two. “Changelings? What changelings?”
“You know, changelings. Nasty little bugs that impersonate ponies and feed off emo–”
“I know what they are!” Twilight huffed. “What happened with the changelings? When was this?”
Shining leaned back in his seat and glanced over at Applejack, who just nodded. “As we said, she has some memory issues currently. What she remembers can be a little jumbled up.”
The humor in Shining’s eyes had evaporated by the time he turned back to look at Twilight. “Ah.”
“So? What about the changelings?” Twilight asked again, keeping her voice as even as possible.
A stern, serious expression settled over Shining’s chubby face. “A few months ago, changelings were discovered impersonating patients. There was a fatality involved, which was thankfully the only loss of life. Still, there was a big panic back in town until we were able to locate and exterminate the nest out in the Everfree.”
“Oh, don’t be so modest. I heard that you were the reason they had any chance of finding those changelings, what with your military training and all. I don’t think the police were prepared for changelings in Ponyville,” Applejack said, some of her accent slipping into her words. She patted the blushing Shining on the back as she looked over at Twilight. “Worst folks round these parts ever have to deal with is the odd wild animal or a stallion getting too much to drink. It was your brother that took charge when the rest of the town was too scared to think that their neighbors might be imposters. Without him, goodness only knows what would have happened.”
“I was just doing my job, Applejack,” repeated Shining as he tried to hide his flushed cheeks. “Like I said, I was a bit more motivated than some of the others.”
Twilight grinned at the warmth and love in Shining’s voice, even as her skeptic side tried to remind her that it could all be a trick. As with her friends, she could sense that honest core of familiarity that couldn’t be extinguished no matter how warped the shadow made the world, the true bit of Shining Armor that continued to survive. “Well, I couldn’t ask for a better BBBFF.”
Shining’s embarrassment visibly deepened, causing Twilight and Applejack to burst into shared giggles. “Well then, I’m gonna mosey along,” Applejack said, checking her watch. “I’ll be back in an hour to collect the both of you. There will be a nurse outside if you need anythin’. Have fun!”
There was a chorus of goodbyes as Applejack strode out of the room. Twilight glanced across the table and almost choked when she saw Shining blatantly eyeing the departing mare’s backside, a different sort of warmth in his eyes. Twilight cleared her throat loudly, causing Shining to flinch like he had been caught with his hoof in the cookie jar.
“What?” he protested with as much innocence as he could scrounge up. Twilight only narrowed her eyes, causing his blush to deepen. “Hey, she’s a good looking mare!”
“And what would Cadance think if she saw you checking out other mares?”
Shining blinked. “Cadance? Who is… Wait, your old foalsitter? Gee, Twily, I haven’t seen her in… years. Not since high school.”
Twilight stared at him, letting the words sink in. After everything you’ve gone through, you’re still going to assume Shining is together with Cadance? It was Twilight’s turn to blush. “Ah. So, you’re not married then?”
There was a fleeting look of sadness on Shining’s muzzle before he puffed up his chest and lifted his chin, a pudgy monument to masculine bravado. “Nope! Your brother is still a free-roaming mustang. I don’t have any mare holding me down, which suits me just fine.”
Inwardly, Twilight winced. “Right. Well, as an ex-Royal Guardspony and local hero, I assume you have plenty of interested mares,” she said, the sarcasm flying over his head. “But what happened to Cadance?”
“She’s still in Canterlot, I guess. I don’t really know.” He cocked his head to the side. “Why are you so interested in her, Twily? You keeping track of all the mares I went out with as a colt? I know you like your lists, but that sounds a bit over the top, even for you.”
“I don’t think anyone cares about that but you,” she teased. “I’m just trying to, uh, remember all the real stuff that happened. Like Applejack said, I’ve got a bit of a memory issue, so it’s all hazy.”
Talking about her memories seemed to rob Shining of his playful spark. “How are you really feeling now?” he asked in a low voice.
“I’m doing fine. And don’t worry, I remember you and mom and dad,” she added, answering the unanswered question she could tell Shining was too nervous to ask. “It’s just… been hard adapting to everything.”
He nodded. “You look and sound much better after that new treatment. When Doctor Rose first mentioned it a few years ago I wasn’t sure it was going to work. Heck, none of us were. Then a few months ago he contacted us again to recommend the treatment, and we decided to accept. And boy, you really do seem like you’re improving.” His smile faded. “So, uh, how have you been handling the, um, symptoms?”
The way Shining asked the question made Twilight pause. It was the pain of someone for whom uncomfortable questions and difficult situations were an everyday reality, yet they never stopped hoping that things might change in the future. Of course he’s used to it. For all he knows, I’ve always been his sick and crazy little sister. Despite the need to push on, Twilight wondered how she could have handled growing up if their places were reversed and Shining had been the sick one. “They’ve been… good,” she said, picking her words with care. “I’m sure the doctors have told you as much?”
“Yes. Both Doctor Rose and Doctor Applejack said you were showing a lot of improvement. I was worried when they said you had some trouble remembering things, but just a few minutes together and I can already see the difference. You’re like a completely different filly.”
“I feel like one.”
“Sorry if I’m gushing, Twily. It’s just a real relief to see you looking and sounding so healthy and… and normal.” There was a moment’s silence before Shining blanched. “Not that you’re not normal! You’re just, you know… sick. There’s nothing wrong with being sick, either. Everypony gets sick. We don’t blame you for being sick.”
His furious attempts to keep from offending her about a past that didn’t exist was both endearing and amusing in equal measure, and Twilight found herself struggling to keep from laughing as he dug himself in deeper with every syllable. “It’s okay, Shining. I understand. I’m happy to not be as sick as I was.”
Shining Armor sunk into his seat with a sigh of relief.
“What I really need, though,” Twilight continued, “is your help on filling in some of the gaps in my memories.”
“Of course! I wanna help you get better more than anything in Equestria. Ask me whatever you want! I can tell you about life in Ponyville, or what our friends in Canterlot are doing, or–”
Twilight leaned forward, tightening her grip on his hoof. “Why did I get committed here?”
Shining was instantly engrossed in the woodwork on the table’s surface. “Why do you want to know that?” he asked with a forced casualness.
“I think I deserve to know why I’m locked up, Shining.”
Eventually the silence grew too much for Shining and he lifted his gaze. “Twily, the doctors told me before I came that I had to be careful about what I told you. The treatment wasn’t easy, and your mind is trying to heal itself. They didn’t want me talking about your fantasies or anything that could upset you.”
“I’m not asking for you to tell me I’m not crazy for talking to a dragon you can’t see,” she said, punctuating her retort with a stern glare. “I just want to know what I am supposed to have done that would warrant putting me in a facility that has a high-security wing where patients spend their nights behind iron bars.” Her expression softened. “I’m your sister, Shiny, and you’re my BBBFF. I need to know this.”
The ticking of the clock settled over them as they sat together. After checking the door again Shining sighed, his reluctant breath drowning out the steady clicking of the mechanical timepiece. “Okay, you win.” Her victorious grin vanished when he leveled the steely gaze he wore on the parade grounds when he was busting in the new recruits. “I do think you deserve to know the truth,” he continued as she adopted a more demure expression, “but this… isn’t something that comes easy to me. The doctors say you’ve made lots of progress, and I can see they weren’t lying. But I don’t want to risk upsetting you or your treatment.”
“Even the doctors say I need to recover my real memories if I’m going to get better.”
Shining nodded. “Yeah, they told me that too. I think that’s why they were so pleased to see me, actually. They were hoping I would help you remember the past and stuff. You know, remind you of what was real.”
Or they wanted to see if I’d have a mental breakdown when faced with ‘the truth’, she thought, keeping her face impassive. Even though the doubt on Shining’s face was tangible as it fought with his desire to help his sister, a lifetime spent living together meant she knew he would give in.
As if on cue, Shining let out an even longer sigh. Releasing his grip on Twilight’s hoof, he leaned back in his seat and took a deep breath. “Twily, you’re here because you hurt some ponies in Canterlot – back when you were really sick.” His tone was detached, like a doctor letting a family know their loved one didn’t make it. Silence again stretched out between them. He watched Twilight expectantly.
Despite having assumed as much, she still felt her mouth go dry at his words. “Did… did I kill anypony?” she whispered. He flinched, and Twilight had her answer. “Oh.”
Inside, Twilight felt a storm of emotion bubble up towards the surface of her thoughts. Part of her angrily resented the mere accusation that she could ever kill anypony in any reality, while the insidious sliver of doubt whispered ‘What if…’ into the back of her mind. But beneath the jumble, Twilight just felt empty. After a week of struggling against a medication she was sure was causing her emotions to go haywire, the idea that she had supposedly committed such a heinous life was as shocking as the breakfast menu.
More than anything else, Twilight just felt a pang of annoyance at being handed another challenge to grapple with, another obstacle in her quest. Twilight struggled to plaster some sympathy and regret onto her face. Better get as much information as I can. “Who did– I mean, what happened?”
“There was an incident at that school you always used to talk about, the one by the castle.”
“Princess Celestia’s School for Gifted Unicorns?” Twilight asked, leaning forward despite herself. “Did something happen during my entrance exam?”
Twilight regretted the question almost as soon as she asked it when her brother’s expression shifted to one of pity tainted with condescension. “You were homeschooled, Twily. You never had an entrance exam. Mom said you snuck out the night before. You left a note saying you were the Princess' personal student, and you had to speak with her to show your magical ability. I mean, ever since you saw the princess at the Summer Sun Celebration, you claimed you were meant to study under her, and I guess at the time our parents didn’t take it too seriously.”
As Shining spoke, Twilight struggled to mask her impatience at a story she found herself predicting with unerring accuracy. The whole history the shadow had crafted for her fell neatly into place: an obsessive filly with delusions of grandeur that believed she was the princess’ personal student; an unsound mind grappling with power far beyond her control but unable to recognize it; an accident that caused enough injury and damage to ensure Twilight would be institutionalized until she was no longer deemed a ‘danger to herself or others’.
It is just what I expected to hear, though, she admitted as her flash of irritation faded. The shadow has tweaked and twisted my entire past to fit the role it has tried to cast me into. Friends and acquaintances turned into patients and staff-members, while personal triumphs become nothing more than the delusions of a broken filly. My life in this reality is like the reflection of a broken mirror.
Twilight kept an expression of unease and regret on her face as Shining continued his tale, his somber tone starkly at odds with her own boredom. The information was helpful but never revolutionary. While she felt small moments of concern and guilt when she learned that the incident was one of the final nails in the coffin for her parent’s marriage, the sadness for their suffering was fleeting when taken against the knowledge that it was only temporary. Once she saved her friends, everything that had transpired would be nothing but a bad dream.
You don’t really care about anypony else, do you? a stallion whispered from behind her left ear.
Twilight swivelled around, but there was no one there.
“Twily? You okay?” Her brother’s concerned frown met her when she turned back to look at him.
“S-sorry, I thought I heard something wrong with the airconditioning,” she replied. “Go on, you were just telling me about… uh…” Her face turned to stone as her mind went blank.
“When I joined the Ponyville Police Department,” he said, and Twilight bobbed her head up and down eagerly.
“Yes, that!”
Her jumpy response prompted a well-practiced smile meant to reassure and calm, which only deepened her embarrassment at being caught not paying attention.
The embarrassment was short-lived once Shining resumed his story. As he reminded her no less than four times, the doctors had suggesting telling her about the past in the hopes of jogging her memories. With the obedient focus of a well-trained soldier, Shining proceeded to tell her every detail of the last ten years in excruciating depth. No element of his life was too minor to escape becoming an anecdote. Trapped in place and unable to even check the clock, Twilight pasted a look of mild interest on her face and stared at Shining like an obedient filly.
Twilight flinched when something heavy impacted with the table. Blinking away the glaze of boredom from her eyes, she looked down to find a stack of books resting in front of her. Above the tower of literature was a beaming Shining Armor. “Before I left, I wanted to make sure I gave you another addition to your private library. I did my best to match what you said in your letter,” Shining added as Twilight pulled the books closer, “but I’m sure they’ve already told you about the restrictions. I can’t be handing you books about medicine and all that brainy stuff. Even then I still had to let that cute nurse with the green mane spend ten minutes going through them all, but at least they didn’t reject anything.”
The books had, like the rest in her possession, seen better days. The faded title A Canterlot Colt in King Avalon’s Court greeted her in embossed lettering. A quick glance at the back confirmed it to be an adventure story about a modern colt transplanted in time to the age of knights and chivalry, with a splash of satire thrown in for flavor. Okay, this actually does sound pretty good, she admitted as she set it aside.
The second was a fairly tame fantasy-romance novel called Dragon’s Dance that she remembered seeing in the library as a filly but had passed over for more serious fare. She kept the disappointment from her face as she neatly stacked it upon the first novel, making sure they were correctly aligned before turning to pick up the last book from the table.
The words The Foal’s Fun Guide to Equestrian History were printed above the cover image of a young filly watching spellbound as different generic figures from history floated out of a book that lay open before her. The colors were bright and the book looked relatively unharmed. It looked… modern. Twilight pulled open the cover and checked the publication date. Her face lit up as she double checked the numbers. It’s only two years old! Her excitement grew as she flipped through the book, revealing page after page of uncensored text. Even as picture-heavy as it was, there was enough promise in its large font to leave Twilight mentally salivating.
“You said you wanted a book about more recent history, so I decided to splurge a little and get something a little more expensive,” Shining explained as he caught Twilight’s expression. “Like, something to celebrate your new treatment.”
“Oh Shining, it’s almost perfect!” she said. After making sure the stack of books were all symmetrical along the spine she jumped to her hooves and gave him a firm hug. “Thank you so much!”
He laughed and returned the hug. “Hey, what are big brothers for if not spoiling their little sisters now and then?”
“I just can’t believe they let you give me this. They were working so hard to keep any modern history away from me. Did they just make a mistake?”
Shining tilted his head. “They’re keeping what from you?”
“Modern history. I’ve got nothing in my library covering events of the past fifty years.”
“Oh, that.” Shining glanced away. “Newer books are… kinda expensive. And the stallion at the used-book shop says there isn’t much demand for them. I’ve seen a few before, but this was the first time you’d ever told me in a letter you wanted stuff on recent history. That’s not really the hospital’s fault, though.”
Twilight rolled her eyes. “Come on, it’s obvious they’re keeping something from me.”
“Now Twily, you can’t be going around believing everything is a conspiracy to get you. After all, you’re getting treatment–”
“And what if there was something wrong going on here?” she interrupted. Planting her forehooves on the table, she leaned forward, dropping her voice to a near whisper. “What if the doctors were keeping something from me? From all of us? Does being crazy mean I can’t be right?”
Shining grimaced. “No, but–”
“But nothing! I can see it, plain as day! There is something they’re keeping from all of us. That Doctor Rose is lying right to Applejack’s face, and she’s just too stubborn to see it.” Leaning back into her seat, Twilight took a few calming breaths. “I understand why you’re a bit unsure, Shining. From what I’ve learned about my past, I was a paranoid filly with lots of delusions and fantasies about the world. But you heard how optimistic they are about my treatment and you’ve seen how I’ve been acting, so you can tell that I’m not like that anymore. There is something wrong, and I need your help. Please.”
A bead of sweat rolled down Twilight’s neck as the siblings stared at one another in silence. It was Shining who blinked first. “Look Twily, I know this is a rough life for you, but you need to be here. You talked about wanting to get out in your letter, and now you’re talking about some possible plot with the staff. It might seem unfair, but even if I could take you home and support you myself, I wouldn’t. Not when you’re in the middle of a new treatment and you’re doing so well. I love you too much to sabotage your health like that.”
“I’m not asking for that!” she said, fighting the urge to grind her teeth together. “I know that you’re not gonna take me at my word right now. I can understand why, too. It’s the logical choice. I only want you to have an open mind and at least investigate the hospital for me.” She lifted her hooves to forestall his protests. “No, not in any official capacity as a police officer. I just want you to help convince me there is nothing wrong.”
“I dunno, Twily. I’m not sure if I should…”
“I just need you to come around here more often. Ask some questions and keep your ears open.” She paused. “It will give you more time around Applejack.”
The look of disapproval Shining leveled at her was betrayed when he burst into laughter. “I’m not gonna spy on the staff just to talk to a cute mare, Twily. I don’t want to throw any fuel on the fire when it comes to your treatment right now.”
“All I want is for you to look into your heart and consider that maybe, just maybe, your sister isn’t as crazy as she sounds.”
The stretch of quiet dragged on as Shining rubbed his hooves together. He let out another, more pronounced sigh. “Fine. But you need to understand that I’m not going to be interrogating nurses or getting a warrant. I’m doing this because I want you to feel a little more comfortable.” He allowed a faint smile to cross his features. “And Applejack is pretty cute.”
Twilight gripped his hooves in her own and squeezed them gently as some of the tension leaked out of her muscles. “Thanks, Shining. I knew I could count on you.”
They embraced in another hug. “Well, you did give me quite the guilt trip. There are easier ways to tell me you want your big brother to spend more time with you.”
A set of firm knocks at the door interrupted Twilight’s sarcastic retort. Applejack poked her head into the room as they pulled apart. “Sorry to interrupt the family reunion you two, but it’s time for Twilight to head on out for her therapy session.”
After another exchange of hugs and renewed promises to come visit more often, Shining made his way past Applejack to the nurse waiting in the hallway to escort him away. He gave Twilight a final farewell wave before turning to give the nurse what he assumed was a confident grin. “Well hello there, beautiful. With mares like you around, I’m starting to regret not choosing to be a doctor.”
The nurse’s groan was thankfully muffled when the door closed with a soft click, leaving Twilight alone with a cheerful Applejack. “So, did y’all have fun?”
Twilight nodded. “Yes. I’m really glad he came to visit.”
“And I bet gettin’ a batch of new books doesn’t hurt either,” said Applejack as she moved over to the table. Sliding the books up onto her back, she turned and caught Twilight’s eyes as they lingered on stack of literature. “I’ll be sure to have one of the nurses take these up to your room. But for now, we need to mosey along. We wouldn’t want you to miss any of your therapy, now would we?”
“No, of course not.”
“Now quit your bellyaching. It ain’t healthy to bottle up your feelings. Sometimes the best medicine is a little socializin’,” Applejack said as she ushered Twilight through the door and straight into Rarity, who was levitating a large stack of folders in front of her. There was a scramble of hooves as the two mares maneuvered to avoid a collision, resulting in the two of them side-swiping each other with a loud oof. All eyes turned to the tower, which swayed precariously. Like an indecisive pendulum it swayed from one side to the other before reluctantly coming to a halt. There was a mutual sigh of relief.
Rarity gingerly placed the papers on the tiled floor before turning around to give Twilight a concerned look. “My stars! Are you okay, darling?”
“Yeah, I’m fine,” Twilight said as she rubbed her flank before gazing up at the impressive stack of folders. “I’m just glad I didn’t make you drop anything.” The moment she met Rarity’s gaze, she froze. The memory of the last time she had seen her friend ripped through her mind like a razor, leaving her heart in her throat. Glancing around for a distraction, her eyes settled on the papers. “So, uh, why are you carrying around so much anyway?” she asked.
“Oh, just another busy day. I’ve got plenty of patients to see, after all.”
Applejack nodded. “Tell me about it.”
“Honestly though, I find it magnificent that Doctor Rose is willing to help so many unicorns with his treatment rather than resort to more… barbaric measures,” Rarity said, her tone growing tight and clipped. “But even with all potential for good we can’t afford to let things get out of hoof. I have plenty of patients to check up on, which means plenty of paperwork for them all – a small price to pay for such wonderful progress.”
Twilight eyed the paperwork. “That’s from all the other patients who have been going through Rose’s treatment?”
“It is. Lots of fillies and colts like you who are having their lives returned to them without the need for a knife.”
“I see.” Turning to Applejack, Twilight gave a sheepish grin. “I don’t want to be rude, but could I have a few minutes alone with my caseworker?”
Applejack’s brow furrowed as she regarded Twilight. “How long do you need?”
“It will only take a minute.”
There was a careful pause. “I don’t see why not,” Applejack allowed. “Just don’t take too long. We have a schedule to keep to.”
“Absolutely.”
Applejack’s stare lingered on Twilight for a moment longer before she turned and shuffled off down the hallway, taking up a post just out of earshot.
Rarity turned to Twilight with a look of polite interest. “So, what do you need to talk to me about, darling?”
“You said all these patients are going through the same treatment as me, correct?” Twilight asked, her voice low but hungry.
“Indeed.”
Twilight took a step closer as she gathered up what she’d gleaned from her time in Broadhoof. “Then please, I need your help. I have some doubts about this treatment and the staff, particularly Doctor Rose. Have you seen anything with the other patients that seems odd to you? Anything that might suggest there is something… wrong?”
“Now Twilight, you know full well I cannot discuss the private medical history of my patients,” Rarity said. “And I’m not going to entertain your paranoia about the staff either. Doctor Rose is working on something magnificent, something revolutionary, and has shown a deep dedication to his patients at every step of his work.”
“I’m not asking for specific information about any patient. I’m just asking for your help, as a friend.” Twilight kept her expression passive and open, keeping her excitement in check. “I just want to know more about how other unicorns have fared under this treatment. Why be so optimistic if my recovery is, like you keep reminding me, so unlikely?”
“Your results have been on the extraordinary side of things, yes,” Rarity said as she wrapped the papers in a blue glow and lifted them off the floor. “Most patients are not as lucky as you have been. However, you’re not alone. There have been other patients who have improved as well. We’re seeing very positive results now, which is more than enough to keep me optimistic about the future.”
“You and your organization help keep tabs on the staff and the treatment, making sure there isn’t anything untoward happening, right?” Twilight paused just long enough for Rarity to nod before she continued. “And this treatment Rose offers, it’s been around for about three years, correct?”
“Yes, that’s right.”
A thrill of excitement passed up Twilight’s spine as she edged closer. “And has the treatment changed in those three years?”
“No, there hasn’t been any alteration in the treatment plan.” Rarity’s disapproving stare remained, but there was a flicker of something behind her eyes. “If he were to change it then he would need approval from the government. It is still relatively new, after all, and we don’t allow doctors carte blanche to do what they will with their patients. We’re here to protect you, and I take that responsibility very seriously.”
“But that confuses me,” Twilight said with care. “You’ve called this treatment revolutionary. Wouldn’t a revolutionary treatment have revolutionary results? It sounds like you’re telling me that after three years, my sort of recovery is still very rare. Why would you be so optimistic then?”
“Because,” Rarity declared, “I’ve seen a number of unicorns like yourself take leaps and bounds in their quality of life under Rose’s care.” She lifted the paper up in front of her muzzle. “Most of these patients right here have seen their lives turned around by Doctor Rose. When I look into their eyes and talk to them I see reason to believe in a better future and evidence to make me optimistic,” Rarity said, her expression hardening. “Now, I don’t wish to be rude, but any more questions about the treatment will have to wait for our weekly session.”
Twilight raised a pleading hoof. “Please, just one more question.”
“Fine.”
Please be right, please be right, please be right, Twilight repeated to herself as she took a deep breath. “Then who did Doctor Rose get permission to change his treatment from?”
Rarity sighed. “I told you that he didn’t, Twilight. Please don’t waste my time on–”
“But you just said that the number of patients improving has gone up recently,” Twilight pressed, her words pouring out in a rush. “For three years the treatment had little to show for it, and suddenly you’re using terms like revolutionary to describe the results. Most of the patients you have in that stack are doing as well as I am, yet I’m supposed to be some sort of rare exception. Something had to change in the treatment to get a reversal like that. So if your agency didn’t approve it, who did?”
There was a long stretch of silence as Rarity simply stared back at Twilight with a mixture of annoyance and confusion. “I don’t have time for this, Twilight,” she said, shaking her head. “We can talk about this during our session, but until then I have other patients that need my service. Good day!”
Fighting the urge to call out after Rarity, Twilight forced herself to stay quiet and avoid pressing her any further. Well, that could have gone better, she admitted to herself. Turning away from her friend, Twilight set off toward the waiting Applejack. Still, at least I’ve planted that seed of doubt. With any luck she’ll start looking a little more closely at what Rose tells her, even if there is nothing to find.
“Ready to get a move on?” asked Applejack as Twilight drew closer.
“If we have to,” Twilight said, pushing her worry about Rarity to the side. Whether or not she does anything, it’s out of my hooves now. I’ll know soon enough. “So, what else is on my schedule for the day.”
“Well, we’ve got a double-long therapy session today. Plus you have your classes with Miss Lulamoon.”
“A round-table conversation about how we’re getting along without magic followed by an hour deep in study about the mystical art of subtraction. Color me excited.”
“Nopony likes a neighsayer,” said Applejack lightly.
Twilight sighed. “I promised I’d behave. I never said anything about liking it.”
From the corner of her eye Twilight caught a glimpse of Rarity standing still in the distance, her expression as unreadable as a porcelain mask as she watched Twilight turn down the hallway and vanish from sight.
Something doesn't smell right...
Twilight's a regular earth pony with the way she's planting seeds this chapter. And there's certainly enough fertilizer around the hospital for them to grow. All they need is a little watering...
i still say twilights not crazy, too many inconsisitencies in a mental hospital which can't afford inconsistencies.
Twilight's getting good at manipulating people. Mr. Shadow is out of his league on this one.
3940031
Sorry, had beans for lunch...
Huh. I was totally expecting Shining Armor to have a permanent limp and be extremely overweight. This chapter was actually downright cheerful, relatively speaking.
Achievements Unlocked!
[Hugs!]: This one's a freebie. (5 Asylum points)
[Special Snowflake]: Learn about your past. (10 Asylum points)
[Jimmy Rustling]: Press for details a total of 5 times. (5 Asylum points)
celebrates loudly and happily. a new chapter!
twi you are not giving us much confidence with your masterminding here. though at the very least she seems to be semi admitting that there could be nothing going on, jsut keeping things in mind.
actually happy we had shining as supportive as ever. knowing him he might actually keep an eye out for real even, just in case.
rarity is something of an enigma to me right now. she is as much of a mystery as any entity or phenomneone that has happened to twilight directly.........
from how she reacted to twilight when she mentioned giving smarty pants to sweetie belle, and poor sweetie belle's condition right now........... I have a gut feeling that rarity never mentioned sweetie belle to twilight. both a combination of it being so personal to her and that she would not want to scare twilight by reminding her of the keratotomy procedure.
could it be true that twilight displayed knowledge that she could not naturally possess to rarity? or is it simply that rarity's pain over sweetie belle is so great that having her suddenly mentioned like that, by a filly rarity knew was suffering from memory problems, that she simply could not hold back the pain?
time will tell........ or more accurrately a certain writer will tell it in time.
I think whoever is in control of this gigantic "Phantasmagoria" (That's an actual term) is learning and adapting to Twilight's advances. She's making progress, yes, and there are severe gaps in this place, but the other side is moving to prevent her escape, I'm sure of it.
something certainly seems odd. can't wait for the next chapter to find out!!!
When a crazy mare starts making sense, you start to wonder. This 'presence' is merely forcing the ponies to ignore it or avoid it. However, just like a tide it always comes back. Just how long till the tsunami of realization strikes and everyone wakes up from this nightmare?
...Since, I first read this story, I still think that there's nothing wrong in the real world. Rather, all the "wrong" is in Twilight's head, the real problem is she's smart...too smart. The worst thing about smart people (very, very, very...etc.) is that they can convince themselves and others that they're right and others are wrong. Also, speaking from a story-wise perspective, the sadness tag applies a lot better if that is the case...Tragedy tag doesn't quite fit, since some people genuinely do live in their heads and while that is sad, it's not tragic. Good story goin' on.
3940031 Knowing this fic, you are probably smelling a decoy of a decoy
I still hold hope that this "shadow" is just a figment of her imagination. To me this story can only end one way; She is crazy and everything is the result of her symptoms. A "boogie" man making all of this up would cheapen this excellent story, and I really hope that it doesn't end up like your normal good vs evil story. Aside from the last couple of chapters, this story has done an excellent job of giving the reader doubt about her mental stability and if it's real or no.
3940041
More like a mushroom factory if you ask me...
3940121
He is a little overweight. Bachelor life and all...
Changelings....
Also, am I the only one who thinks that the next time Twilight returns to her room, the history book will be missing and the nurses will claim never to have seen it at all?
3940294 Of course. It's *expensive* and *valuable* and those things are always stolen by the nurses.
3940294
Nope, I was just going to post that myself. If not missing, it'll be heavily censored, at the very least.
3940294 Not remotely.
3940213
Maximum disagreement.
If everything is just in her head, then everything she has struggled for is ultimately worthless. All character development resets to zero and the story goes out with a whimper rather than a bang. I'm not saying this story has to have a happy ending, but hand-waving all the inconsistencies, and dismissing the clearly supernatural nature of her problems would be a very lame cop-out.
It's much more interesting to fight off a poisonously cunning enemy within a twisted parody of the real world, then 'well, she was just crazy the whole time.'
Uhhh.... you guys? Recent books are a rare, expensive commodity of little interest?
Guys, this alternate world is all Fahrenheit 451 on us: books are considered awful.
“From what I hear, the mayor wants to give you an award for your help eradicating that changeling infestation we had a few months ago
This paragraph lacks closing punctuation.
Twilight raises an interesting point here. Why has the results of the treatment improved so suddenly with no authorised changes to it? Also, after reading these comments, I'm going to be interested to see what happens with that book on modern history. I have a feeling that's not going to be the last we here of the changeling attack either. There are a lot of questions here, the main one being wether there due to something sinister going on or Twilight actually being delusional...
I squealed when I saw that this story updated! This was a great chapter, I'm glad that we finally know what Twilight is in the institution for. I still think that Twilight is insane and that this is all in her head, but I can definitely tell there is something up with Doctor Rose. Part of me hopes that Twilight is right about the world being strange trap made by darkness just for her sake and that of the other ponies, but I don't know yet. Also the fact that the nurses are taking the recent history book seems a little sketchy to me. I wonder if they'll take out any pages.
3940430 little itneret to a guy whose business is selling older books to begin with.
3940213 unless the boogeyman in question is actually her own insanity struggling to break free.
there is also the question of what the plague doctor is. his coming has far too many coincidental electrical shortages. not to mention it appeared seemingly indepedently to the smiling shadow in that dream.
thankfulluy this is equistrai and such things can be applicable.
Was great fun joining the editors team for this chapter. Looking forward to more!
OH GOD
CHAPTER 21.... well, this is gonna scare the piss out of me.
Mr. Bone's Wild Ride has nothing on this.
Loving the story. :) Another great chapter, keep up the very good work!
3759228
Hey, I gotta give something back to people who read and comment! ... even if it is weeks later.
3759436
3759598
Fingers crossed!
A new chapter is always welcome! However, I admit to feeling a bit cheated that we don't even get to hear Twilight's alternate history. I understand the details don't really matter, and the more you include the more they could paint you into a corner with future events and fan theories, but I still was looking forward to hearing some. Who died? How? Were either Princess Celestia or Princess Cadance involved? Is Twilight exceptionally powerful, or was whatever happened within the abilities of an average filly?
Still, interesting reaction to it all from Twilight. Not only is she completely emotionally removed from the events she has decided are fiction, she can't even be bothered to pay attention to them. That's a rather extreme reaction. So much so that the whole time with her brother has an almost dream-like quality to it, as details are hard to come by in a dream. Likewise, even though she glimpses something with modern history in it, there's no indication that she learned anything from her quick look... Any pictures of Luna there, for instance? I, too, wonder if she'll ever get the chance to really read the book.
An intriguing (if occasionally frustrating) chapter!
continuation of first comment and maybe an editing.
now we know that while the incident happened in the school, she was never considered applicable for the test, likely do to her insanity. though it leaves me wondering what happened though. i would presume twilight is not outright homicidal, all things considered, so how did she kill someone.......
actually i have to ask, is tiwlight cutie mark still that strange star, representing magical talent? likely she would notice if her cutie mark was either altered or even missing, though it is not referenced. if it is still that mark, then it would give some more clarity. and yet confusion. for if she did not have that exam, then how did she gain that mark.
and twilight hears something again......... though since it is a stalloin............. oh dear, you are good at making us wonder aren't you?
in twilight's defense she is totally convinced that everything around her is an illusion, and thus felt more detached than she ouwld if she believed the world had substance. there is sitll some doubt all in all.......... though unfortunately if ti all turns out real, she will probably be crushed if it all turns out to be the truth. twilight does care for others, she is just convinced herself that it is all an illusion....... the guilt she would feel if it all turned into reality would be crushing. and it is all the worse because her memories are legitimately harmed. she remembers delusions with the same detail she remembers normal memories.
...........why would changelings infiltrate a asylum? i can see two reasons why this is heer on surface. if memory serves me someone wrote a side fic that had an incident with changelings. secondly it is to make us question twilight more. changelings attacked the asylum, could go with a certain delusion. '
but why would they infiltrate an asylum? like in that story, the changeling featured was starving from a lack of love in that facility........ so why did the chagnelings go there? what was their purpose? was it them thinking there would be love there? does not seem the changelings would make such an obvious mistake. and why were only patients replaced? why not staff an patients? if it was both then the changelings could better organize. so long as it was not someone to significant like a doctor.
though considering they all eliminated the nest two things can be inferred. either that chrysalis does not exist here, or that she was simply not there. chrysalis is a dangerously powerful creature, if far from a match for alicorns. shining armor would not be enough. and if chrysalis exists and sent them there, for what purpose?
i am hoping this changelign thing has something to do with it all. because having something as dangerous as chagnelings pop up and just be a reference to a fan seems kinda iffy to me.
cannot wait for the next chapter either way. i have a thousand a nine suspicions.
3759702
Well I'm glad I could help with school then! Keep slogging away.
As for friendships, well, the mind can create anything it wants, really.
3759828
3759935
D'awwww. Time for a group hug!
3760582
Oh, how right you were...
3760645
Effort always helps. It looks impressive. And you're obviously intelligent and astute behind it too.
3760671
Where's my- I mean, its free cake?
Okay, mental note: no matter how excited you are to see a new chapter, don't squee when you have a throat infection. But enough about that; it's time to read! :D
Changelings? Interesting.
So your reactions don't strike you as at all… unusual for you, Twilight? Even under the circumstances?
Oho, and what's this? Either we have yet another hallucination or the plague doctor is male, can be invisible, and has spoken.
…Huh. Shining left without a major disaster. A pleasant surprise.
Hm. But some possible actual evidence of something up in the hospital? I'm still far from convinced, but it now seems less implausible…
Aaaand the chapter ends. Ah well. I look forward to the next one!
3761392
Hehehe...
3761662
It's quite possible. I was looking up proper names for asylums back in the planning stages, to get a feel for what the full name should be.
3762405
You're right, at least in terms of name. My winks and nods to other works of fiction are generally as subtle as a train, I have to say.
3762806
Another fantabulous post. You have an acute mind for the analysis.
3763064
Thanks! Fix'd!
3763150
Makes sense, really. Dispersing energy (aka magic) and the like.
3763294
Plays the Jaw's theme...
3763489
Maybe you can turn them in for DLC content?
Play as Pinkie Pie and utilize 20 new skills as you...
3763808
*poker face*
3765110
Well, I was also a bit quicker back then.
3765196
Me too!
3767419
And as y'all know, I lurve me a good theory!
3766617
3769469
Who, me? *innocent face*
3771950
Just posted.
3777690
*cackles diabolically*
3779538
Hurrah!
Does that mean I win a trophy?
3779814
Delivered, as requested.
3779853
D'awwwww!
3784192
Well thanks! I'm glad you're enjoying it, and I hope you are gonna stick along for the ride.
3784268
Sleepless nights? Haunted dreams? It seems my work here is done.
3787512
Hehehe. Thanks!
3787951
I was hoping it would be a touching moment, and I'm glad it reached you emotionally.
3792423
Just wait.
3799583
Which means I've done my job as an author.
3801357
I'm glad you're enjoying it. As for the mental side... well, I'd suggest getting to work reading up on the internet, because that isn't an easy question to answer.
3830699
Hehehe. Thank you kindly.
Sometimes I like to think I can be subtle.
3833636
Oddly enough, I've never played those games. My only relationship to them was watching a Zero Punctuation review of them back in the day. But this is a fairly common theme in a lot of different places.
3842010
YES YES YES I'M HAPPY!
3847069
Of course!
3940615 my current theory is that the Plague Doctor is an avatar of somepony in the outside world observing or even trying to help out twilight.
there's nothing so far that points to him being a bad guy; the most he's ever done is scare the bejeezus out of twilight.
3847143
Sounds like someone should write that.
3848293
Ooookay...
I can't help but love this tale, even if keep us in the grey area every single chapter. Some things are revealed, others questions arise... and everything is told by a pony who is considered a dangerous psychopath.
It was good to see that Shining is still a competent pony of law, and is cute his desire of, someday, throw Applejack from a balcony "Ops, earth pony, should think about that better" :D
Liked this chapter a lot, can't wait for the next, in which I am hoping for one thing, one thing only. Twilight is "talking" with Fluttershy through an exchange of birds drawings... last chapter she did what I expected: she draw a bunny. I am hoping Fluttershy answers with a depiction of a particular rabbit...