Writer of The Day My Life Ended. Always working on my next story. Spotty with updates.
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CURRENTLY BEING REVISED!
Morgan Spencer is a reality traveling fan girl. After Twilight Sparkle reads a spell out loud, the Mane 6 end up in Morgan’s world! Morgan has to juggle her two lives, and figure out who she really is along the way.
(Be warned. Chapter 49 contains slight gore (at least by my standards of writings). The rest is still good)
The prequel. is up. Read if you want.
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Um.
I only read the first couple of chapters, so correct me if I'm wrong.
But the main character has pretty much completely unexplained magic powers that let you "jump" into media, and... doesn't affect canon at all?
And time works differently here and there? So the protagonist can convieniently visit anywhere she wants for a FEW DAYS during her FREE PERIOD?
Hm.
Not liking it, but not disliking either.
2763586 if you've only read a few chapters then you haven't gotten too far with the actual plot and her powers are explained later :)
I think you need to fix the italics. Great chapter though.
...
Ohhhhhh snaaaaaap.
Something tells me your plan didn't exactly go as you had planned it to go Morgan.
~ Super-Brony12
Hey, birds of a feather. Morgan has the same power I like to give some of my characters.
(Sure beats having to explain how exactly they wind up in different worlds.)
....
This isn't good.
~ Super-Brony12
I hope Dominic gets his arse served on a silver platter for everything that he's done and caused.
Good chapter! Look forward to the next one.
~ Super-Brony12
Dominic, I hope that when this is all over, that you rot in the very depths of Tartarus where you belong. And even them taking you in might be a long shot because of how despicable you are.
And your right Darcy, I too, hope Morgan has a plan. Because if she doesn't, then no matter what, you, Morgan, and Lilac are all going to be a few corpses.
Good chapter and I can't wait to see the next one come out!
~ Super-Brony12
Oooooo, things have just gotten really good! You have me psyched for the next chapter now! Still looking forward to Dominic getting his ultimate comeuppance.
All it takes is for one seed of doubt to be planted in the mind of a person, and from it, a revolution can blossom and grow. So all in all, nice chapter here and I'm really anxious for the next chapter too!
~ Super-Brony12
Wow, 47 chapters, cant believe it went so far.
Ah yes the fuck up that all bad guys cause themselves either early on or later. Dominic's mistake was not fully and utterly checking if they got the right girl. Now he has to deal with the original owner of all the dark emotions that made up Darcy. In short he will need a lot more men and probably a tank.
Edit: And I mean an actual tank. Mostly to make sure she is dead. With me the motto is if your going to kill someone be absolutely sure they are dead.
Hmm...well guess what Dominic. You are royally screwed. Hope you enjoy your impending trip to Hell. Because the way I see it, Hell is going to be a lot nicer of a place than what is about to be unleashed upon you.
In other words, good bye you cold, spineless, sadistic asshole.
~ Super-Brony12
Wooo... Nice.
Great Chapter! Can't wait to find out what happens next!
Yes! Down with Dominic and huzzah for Morgan!
Also, that cliffhanger you left at the end there sounds really ominous. Makes me even more excited for a sequel!
More importantly, however, thank you for creating such an interesting story to read.
~ Super-Brony12
I go away for a few months and this story is finished...
I can dig it
Wowowowo! I just see that this story has a prequel. Its necesary that I read that one first? Been honest not really interested in it :/
3868535 The prequel is not necessary to read, it's just has some funny stories about Morgan before this story.
it's also what I'm writing to slowly give the identity of who caused all of this in the first place. (cue evil laugh)
4007091 Give it time.
Huh, you wrote the sequel before the prequel. Or is the prequel going to be a giant retcon? ;p
Just kidding, I can guess the reasoning behind doing it that way. Now, off to read the story we go!
4633712 I wrote it that way so I could finalize some things for the sequel, The Day My Life Continued. TDMLB will also reveal some important events that I feel are necessary for both the story and Morgan’s character development. At the end, I am planning on showing how Morgan became human in Equestria which lead to the events of this story. Just to be a heartless bitch, I am also adding the main villain of the sequel.
4635306 twenty-six, and I wrote that later. Keep in mind, this story was not as well thought at it is now. Most of her abilities I came up with on the spot, then I had to fully think them out later on. I apologize for that.
And with Morgan, you have to realize she has not much experience in the friend department.
I apologize for any future confusion.
4638595 oh hey, just checked the story main page since I figured you would have replied somewhat. There's a bug with the site where users won't get notified of replies if it wasn't posted on the same chapter as the original comment. When posting on the stories main page, this means the comment is posted on the latest chapter (in this case, chapter 50),which means I would never have seen the reply save I came back and checked (or at the very end).
Food for thought. ;)
We laughed when your reply basically said the same thing I did afterward. Too funny!
4660257 damn it! I thought I fixed that! That’s what I get for publishing that chapter from my iPhone.
4663139 4660797 Lol no worries.
It seemed a little backward that being unable to breathe proves the ability to breathe, but then the whole point is the novelty of recognizing the ability to be unable to breathe.... Does that make sense at all?
Is it bad that we have no trouble reading your code speak? Though pronouncing it is nearly impossible for most of the words....
Yup, felt it was too easy.
Hmm the mane six were rather thick here. I mean, Darcy is vicious, but wouldn't usually go out of her way to appear clueless. It took way to long for them to realize she wasn't acting right....
Ha, too easy. Felicity walked right into that one.
Stupid Morgana, escaping like that! Oh well.
And that's a wrap folks!
I'm only a little upset she didn't hack up another way to get Darcy back, but there's always more time for that later?
We love how you keep the timeline fixed correctly, the more things change the more they stay the same.
The Twitchplayspokemon of Dominic was rather boring, come to think about it, it could have been so much worse...
One thing that strikes me is how little we see of other travelers. Especially when traveling, unless each one gets their own instance when traveling initially to a new place.
Well, let's see what you have coming down the road next!
Keep going! ;)
4676823 Thank you for all your comments. It's really helped a lot. And yes, I know that we see very little Travelers during this as well as TDMLB. Still working on the explanation as to how there can be thousands upon thousands of these guys yet Morgan is the only one seen in Equestria. It might not b a perfect one, but still an explanation. There are going to be a ton of Travelers in the sequel.
I'm also going to be adding various explanations for other things into the sequel, and maybe one or two in the prequel.
4678456 Yeah, my head cannon for the missing travelers is that they each get their own "slice" of the universe they're jumping into, unless they're specifically traveling with regards to another traveler (how Lisa was able to go with Morgan).
I would imagine that anything brought back would have a unique energy signature that could be traced to the particular Traveler they belong to, which is how they would be able to send them back even without the Traveler doing so themselves, and how it's generally unlikely for them to be sent back to the wrong universe.
This would also explain why it was so difficult for Morgan to "guess" the right universe to travel to, since she did not have a latch signal to hook onto (and why it was more difficult than normal).
Anyways, just a few ideas.
4681578 wow. That’s way better than what I was gonna do. It was pretty much just the first paragraph. That was as far into it as I got.
her mom was a what?
8216358
OMG I always miss something! Thank you. I fixed it for you.
Is this completed or not?
8643603
...it’s completed but I’m rewriting it.
Love this!
9328230
Aww! Thank you!
Lol, I'm laughing at my AN. Oh past me, nine months is nothing.
A lot of things in this chapter make no sense in context of chapter 7.
In chapter 7 Morgan told her human friends about her powers while sitting in the tree. Here it seems to be implyed that she told them "during lunch" which chapter 7 implyed they hadn't eaten yet. "Go eat lunch without me."
The comversation about not knowing what happened kinda makes no sense either, since the humans were literally standing under the tree and talking to Morgan when she fell. Sure, there would be confusion about why she is unconscious but the tone of the conversation doesn't project that (to me at least).
And all the apparent reactions of the humans couldn't have happened in chapter 7, because there was no time between Morgan telling them and falling out of the tree.
It feels to me like some ideas got mixed up here in the 10 months between revising chapter 7 and 9. Or maybe the whole thing will be explained later on, but as of now I am confused. I will continue reading but I wanted to put my thoughts down here before doing so.
WIth all that being said, I like the story so far. I wanna see where it is going.
Why is Luna angry? It was said that Luna and Raspberry were friends, that Luna send the m6 to find her because she was worried about both Raspberry and the bipedal creature. Even if the m6 disappeared and even if enough time has passed for the princesses to have become worried about them, Lunas reaction still doesn't make sense. She should be relieved or worried or surprised or maybe inquisitive about what happened to Raspberry and the m6, but not angry. She shouldn't know about the connection between Raspberry and
Morganthe bipedal creature she has seen and therefore not be suspicious.9821301
I think I'll go into it at a later chapter. But thanks for it!
It just so happened that I reread the fic just yesterday so the old chapter 19 was still somewhat fresh in my memory when I read the new one and I have to say:
You have improved a lot. The new version's Morgan feels a lot more like a character and a lot less ... Mary-Sue-ish, a lot less like a generic self-insert power fantasy.
The whole rewritten parts look really good so I can only encourage you to keep it up. Though it may have been a better choice to just start a new fic as the rewrite since the rewrite and the original have diverted enough that continuing to read at this point without having known the original is basically impossible. Half the info is missing, like Lila never introduced herself to Morgan, Morgan hasn't had time or opportunity to reseach Danielle, so her being murdered is unknown to Morgue and the readers. Stuff like that. Since you are gonna have to keep that in mind you are basically writing half of a new fic at this point but I guess once you are done it'll be a none-issue.
Now for the thing that irks me.
Spoilers for basically the entire fic till this point ahead. You have been warned.
I can usually overlook certain things in fanfiction, in fiction in general actually. One of those things is timings and timelines; however sometimes - when a fic is good enough to keep my mind on it for a long time - I notice inconsistencies especially when they get pointed out in the fic itself. In this case it is "The phone said it was 2:30." and that felt wrong to me. Why? Because when Morgan collects her friends she says the following: "our best bet is to reach the police station before they close. Cops tend to rush stuff near the end of their shift, so long as it means they can leave", which implied to me it was afternoon or evening. Trying to figure out what time it was (basically trying to see if Morgan's "it was morning" could fit) I found myself digging deep into the timeline of the fic:
When Morgan got the m6 out of her house it was morning before school, when the m6 got to school "They had been walking for nearly two hours." Afterwards they hear the scream. Therefore that scream was probably somewhere around lunch. (I am not going into the inconsistencies between ch7 and ch9 right now since I already commented on that under ch9.) Going by ch9 it was even after lunch.
THEN Morgan ends in the hospital and here it gets even more confusing since Morgan herself spend a night over in MLP so I gotta ignore her personal timeline as I am currently interested in the timeline of earth. On earth apparently things progressed a lot slower considering Morgan getting there and AJ/RD getting arrested happened on the same day: since the doctor talked with Morgans parents after the surgery and "soon" afterwards the arrest happened. When Morgan awakes the not-a-nurse tells her "Those kids haven’t left your side through all of this, even when your parents walked out." so either Anna, Caroline and the m6 slept in the hospital room (which I highly doubt) or she woke up the same day. I do not know how to interprete Pinkie Pie's "you slept for almost a whole day"... since it's Pinkie Pie that could mean anything from half an hour to 23h 59m. But as I said evidence suggests that we are looking at still the same day so Pinkie is exaggerating. The doctors saying Morgan "should have woken up by then" however means it's not an insignificant amount of time.
Afterwards Morgan has enough time to read the entire book before Dominic shows up. Then the whole spiel with Morgan getting out of the hospital and being brought to her home happens. After which she immediately drives over to Caroline where that previous quote about the police station happens: "our best bet is to reach the police station before they close. Cops tend to rush stuff near the end of their shift, so long as it means they can leave" Then they go to the car to get going.
Note there hasn't been a night in between there meaning that this is all the same day unless I am missing something.
1. Now at the police station is the first indication that the time may have flipped here as Morgan says: "Wednesday, this early? Flannigan is on shift with Hillary at the front desk." Back then I assumed that meant that it wasn't end of shift yet so it can technically be called too "early" for closing time.
2. Then Robert drives Morgan around and ends up on the parking lot where the following sentence is said when he takes Morgan out of the car: “Tell me you aren’t doing this in broad daylight.” Since it is January one would assume we are already past sundown (we are in the western hemisphere, after all) but the wording could also just be metaphorical which is what I assumed.
3. The conversation between Felicity and Dominic is vague enough to happen at any point in the day but Dominic indicates that it is getting close to closing time when he thinks: "Dominic spent the better part of the week cleaning up her messes. He would much rather have gone home."
The conversation between the technically yet unnamed girl and Morgan gives us no idea of when it happens.
Those three points are all vague enough that they can cause confusion on what time it actually is in the human world.
Now with all that in mind in ch19 we enter MLP for a short while and come back to earth and suddenly it's 2:30, the drive to the police happened at 8 AM before school. And that is the moment where my mind screeched to a halt and told me that this can't be true.
I know I went on a huge tangent here; I just needed to confirm to myself that I hadn't missed a night somewhere along the way. I don't want to take the wind out of your sails or nothing but this just doesn't fit and since you are in the process of rewriting the fic, I believe this is the best time to point it out.
Also I am also still a little salty that we never got to see Morgan tell the m6 about what her powers actually do. The best we got was her telling them that this was another reality and it would kill her to transport all 6 over and she'd pass out with 2. Or the reactions of Morgan's human friends to her telling them about her abilities. Their reactions are referenced later but they never happened, as referenced or otherwise.
Why did you make this story before you made the prequel?
11132438
Cause I like the idea so much that I couldn't wait for the prequel
11112436
You make a lot of good points. So much so, that it may take me a little bit to get to all of them. I'm gonna get to the big ones that weren't spoilers. Or, they are spoilers but also not spoilers?
1: I love your comments. I know I'm about to be hit with good constructive criticism and genuine praise when I see your name pop up. I'm also happy that Morgan feels more real here than before. It's kinda disturbing to read the past chapters and go "oh no, Morgan would never say this. Why did I start her off this way. What was I thinking- she's smarter than this." I rewrote her entire meeting with Dominic by that logic alone.
2: Chapters 1-2 take place on January 14. 3-12 take place on January 15. 13-20 on January 16. If you want hour by hour, I can make it for you. Yes it says 'end of shift' but at the time, I figured that as like the night shift changing into the day shift kinda thing. Cops gotta work nights too, yeah? I explained that poorly. My bad. I made like a dozen notes keeping track of all of this- but didn't wanna boggle the fic with all the time stamps.
By my own checks, Morgan passed out from the tree Jan 15 at Noon, woke up in Equestria at the same time. She, Lilac, and the princesses flew to Ponyville. I have no idea how long it takes to fly long distance like that. Also, there's all the conversations taking place and then the fact that neither of them would've slept well for real. She wakes up January 16 early morning, the sun shining through her window. Yes she slept a long time. Yes so did Lilac. She does a few things before going back Home, 'waking up' somewhere between 5 and 6am. Her friends talk and leave from 5-6. The nurse leaves her a book at almost 6. She reads it very fast- she's got that skill. At 6, Dominic and her talk for the first time. Her parents argue with the hospital staff from 6-7. At 6:30, they take her home. 7, they leave for work. 7:30, Morgan gathers up her friends. 7:50, police station. Almost 8, what I deemed a good 'end of shift' time.
8am- chapter 17. 8-2:30- chapter 18. 2:30- chapter 19. 2:30-3- chapter 20
Dominic's comments about the 'better part of a week' are mainly because: Monday night, the ponies are seen wandering. Not a big deal at first, but you better bet they made a show when they arrived that his people caught. Tuesday: multiple sightings and disturbances, including a whole ass arrest about people that don't exist on record. Then he spent most of Tuesday night up until Wednesday morning keeping tabs on Morgan and co. to see what work was being done to get them home. As he saw little progress, he decided to bring Morgan in.
3: Originally, this wasn't meant to change as much as it has. Only when I changed one chapter I ended up wanting to change the next chapter and so on and so on and...yeah. I keep thinking about posting it as a whole separate thing. It's like that on AO3 and FFN, but I think I've mostly kept it here like this because it's the OG site for me, and this keeps a better track of my word count than I can.
4: If there was anything I missed, sorry. I'm working on it without a beta cause like...how do I catch them up at this point?
5: Okay I read the last paragraph and: ...wait yeah I don't think I've written that properly. Like she's thought about it, and maybe told others, but never to all of them in a linear, cohesive way. Next chance they get, Morgan will spill the beans. Or someone else will do it for her.
6: You didn't take the wind out of my sails or anything. Constructive criticism like this is always welcome. Can't wait for what you say about the chapter I just posted.
This chapter hit me like a ton ... no, an entire truck load of bricks. In itself it is a great chapter, it's well written and it has given a deep look into the poor soul that is Morgan. What her parents did to her is abuse, emotional abuse, pain and simple, no exaggeration. I wanted to reach through the screen and hug Morgan as well as beating the crap out of her parents. Even knowing that neither would help the poor girl.
Morgan's inner turmoil and her view and perception of her parents hit closer to home than I would have liked but that also means that you did a really great job writing it.
I know I always had something to criticize when I commented on the rewrite but this time I got nothing. Well done, I enjoyed the chapter immensely.
PS: If anyone else finds themself in Morgan in this chapter, please consider getting a therapist in deep psychotherapy. That kind of upbringing and dealing with emotions is extremely unhealthy. I got help and it helped. .
Rereading this chapter to mentally review before reading newer chapters makes me so glad I spent time reading Norse runic when I was younger, which is technically written Omni-directionally in circles and to learn to read upside down I had to learn to read backwards naturally