Ah, what an amazing event is Comic Con. So many people, so many costumes, and so many merchandise sellers. Who knew that a simple bronze key and an amazing costume you can be transported into another world, oh well. At least this Equestria is not that different from the one in the show. Well, how saying goes: "If life give you lemons, make lemonade!"
Gore tag is for some of the creatures, sex tag is for some of the jokes. Teen for the same reasons plus language.
May contain some creatures from Swedish folklore, the game Year Walk, and I think from some north Europe folklore.
Maybe I`ll make some illustrations
Mlp by Hasbro,
Year Walk by Simogo.
A good start to what I think to be a great story, looking forward to the next chapter. As for any errors i didn't really see any while reading thru. Keep it up!!
>its a random loser getting powers/abilities for no reason and going to Talking Horse Land
More please
This is amazing pls make more
8467107
How is this amazing? Is it the cardboard "OC"? The copy/paste story progression? The bland dialogue?
Do tell.
8467122
I am enjoying it so don't care what you think 🖕
8467131
You made a statement now I'm asking you to actually back it up.
How is this a good story? Stop being triggered and just give an answer.
Hope to see more soon
8467138
Meh. We don't really need a reason to enjoy this story or any others, we like what we like and the same applies for everyone. You don't like like story, that's fine, but there will always be people who enjoy it regardless.
I'm not trying to sound like I'm hating on you or others like you, cause I'm not. Your entitled to your opinion and us to ours. There is nothing wrong with that, and anyone who says there is, has no idea what they're saying.
Deleting comments now? Are you that thin skinned "author"?
8467909
Just stopping the flood in comments. And yeah I get your point. But you know what? It's the first story I ever started to write! Of course its not going to be amazing, or even pretty good! So please stop that senseless flood and spam about how you annoyed by the fact somebody enjoying my First story.
With love and hopes for understanding, the Author.
8467918
I could point out everything you messed up on, but first: the snowflake font? Why are you choosing to further embarrass yourself?
8467929
And what exactly is "the snowflake font"? I really don`t know.
8467936
Regular text isn't in queen purple.
Wait, are you that Skittles fruit?
Spelling and punctuation are fine but grammar is a little bit off. I am enjoying it regardless!
"Why does she keep flying off al the time?" Seems to be what you meant.
Should add the 'a' where it is bolded and remove the 'the' where it is underlined.
Did you mean "Well of course you are."? This line confused me and took me out of the story.
I think you mean "Aren't we all".
There's a few more but I am currently on my way to work so I have no time.
I am enjoying the Year Walk crossover immensely. I loved the game and to see some character and humanity added to these cosmic beings is going to be interesting!
Keep up the good work!
8468476
Thank you so much! I completely missed that all.
Some grammar errors but the story is amazing!!!
Hey look, my name :D wow wow wee woo.
Well twilight fucked up
The irony the elements are supposed to protect equestria but yet they may just doom it
Or to put it simply they don goof
Jolly good show, Jolly Jolly good show indeed.
I hope you all enjoyed this chapter, as much as I did. Now, to be honest, I did not do that much editing. Only things here and there, but whatever. Also, I would like to say thank you to everyone who is liking and actually reading his story, and my editing. (Which is bad.) I know it's not the best, But I'm working with limited resources, Namely, Time. (Witch thanks to this four day weekend I have plenty of. :D) so yeah. I hope you all a pleasant day, and an even more pleasant life, With love, the Editor of anyone and all. :P
( P.S. I'm up to doing edits on (anyone's) stories if you need me. Just PM me, and ask.)
Well twi has unleashed something that hungers
Holy shit this is good for a 'first' story
Lemme rewrite this for you...
This story is decently executed for a Displaced so far, but the writing could use a bit more work.
"Conquer"
Would you like a second proofreader?
MORE
8555245
Just you wait friend, I got done with editing the third chapter yesterday, and oh boy is it something. So you just need to wait for the author to fix up and release the chapter. Also, the ending is...... interesting. So I hope you all enjoy it, I know I did.
8569341
yay!~ its out! I’ve been waiting forever! ;D (Not really. :P)
!!!It's a tra!... Nevermind, it's just a Pinky party.
Even with the fact English is your third language your story and chapters came out great! I can't wait for more
8476776
Yeah. The Church Grim was there, for a reason. What's more, it's Clear that The Ponies don't seem to understand what 'Neutral alignment' is, since they tensed up after he said he was Not Evil, but Not Good either. Apparently, they seem to think, 'If It's Neutral, then it MUST be plotting Evil!'.
You have a talent with words my friend. While i noticed a few small errors in wording here and there, great work. Keep it up.
8673161
My idea of neutral is,you don’t shoot me, and I don’t shoot you
update please
I think you meant to say conquer.
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8467122
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8468198
Oh, its you. I remember you. Your that fag who has nothing better to do than cut other people down because he feels insignificant. Do us all a favor and complain to someone who actually gives a shit.
Don't have a nice day,
Gizmo, the guy with a true heart.
8468705
hay come back to this!!!
Oh... it’s back.
IT LIVES!!!!!
it's not dead
IT LIVESSSSSSS
No problem your health is more important anyway
It's alright man! Ya gotta take the time necessary to get your life in order! Glad to see your back!
I was not informed that he was just gonna drop it like this, otherwise, I would have edited it beforehand, oh well.
I hope you all enjoyed it nonetheless.
[Yes, the editing's done, just need to wait for the author to implement said edits.]
Cheers!
I love this story a lot, I noticed it hasn't updated in quite some time but I still hold out hope. The storyline is really intriguing with where it's going and I absolutely love how it's been written, I'm not sure if it'll be continued but I'll happily say I love it, and it's going on my favorites! ^^
really like the story concept wish it would continue with some more chapters
…..
I really like this character I hope Grim will never reveal his Human past.