About where the pumpkin boat sails next

On the street stood a warm spring day, birds sat on the wires and sang, the flowers were blooming, one orange bastard looked from the bushes near the pond into the clean water, planning to snatch a carp from there, and overhead, for the first time in two years, some loud big-ass plane flew by.

Enjoying all this near his house stood P_R_O_T_O, flipping meat with one hand, holding a tray for meat in the other, waving it to fan the flames, and with his third hand typing text for this blog on his phone. With his foot, he pressed on a rubber hedgehog with a hole in its belly, and from the pressure, a soul-crushing squelching sound and water poured out of it.

After sufficiently stinking himself with an expired firestarter liquid, burnt pages with geodetic calculations and charcoal, he took the meat off the fire, placed it on the tray, carried it into the house to the kitchen, and then went further inside. Sitting at his computer chair, apparently to let it soak up the smoke from his clothes, he began to type the blog text, this time for real, because unfortunately he didn't have a third hand.

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So, hello world and hello people.

Since I've hung out on the featured page for so long, I guess I'm allowed to pour out an unrequested stream of my consciousness on strangers now. Or maybe not, I feel like the combination of Anon + sex tags is a direct ticket to featured that anyone can take if they wish.

But, to the point. First of all, remember - tarot is a scam, do not believe anyone who uses it. Real fortune tellers just breathe in car exhaust and then see visions of the future, past, and present in oil spills on the ground and in the schemes of the Chinese rail network.

Second - what to expect from me next. For now, nothing. Definitely nothing this spring, extremely unlikely in the summer, maybe in the fall, and most likely in the winter. My second project has been marinating on my Google Drive and elsewhere for three months now, and it's far from completion. Not because there's a lot of text there, it's just 10k words for now, but because text is not the only element there. Does it relate to fimfiction at all? Well, kind of... Anon is still there at least. A little too much of him.

I could of course post its textual part right now and then continue to work on everything else separately, but that's all wrong, that will ruin the integrity of the project and the surprise effect. After all, I'm writing comedy, and in jokes, the main thing is delivery and surprise. A good joke is like ten flying refrigerators smashing into your windows in the middle of the night - it's unexpected, absurd, overwhelming, somewhat stupid, and smells like meat. Which I'm going to eat now.

So thank you for your attention, dear readers, your feedback moves me forward. And now I will disappear into the fog.