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My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
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Perfect timing. Reading time!
Seems to be lacking in funerals though?
Scootmble?
Rumbaloo?
Scrumble?
I dunno
Heh, a Scoots/Rumble romance?
I can dig it.
Loving it!
~Skeeter The Lurker
SCOOTARUMBLE SHIPPING
Acceptable filler until more EoP is ready for viewing.
Shipping by Skirts that's... not AppleDash? And straight?!
Is... is that even legal?
Anywho, will read tomorrow when I'm stuck at work doing nothing. WHEEEEEEE!
3234397 Rumbleloo.
3234582 Have yet to read it. Have high hopes, though.
Just finished it, and I gotta say... I really enjoyed that. I'm not a fan of shipping in general, but this pulls it off in a life-like, cute, kiddish kind of way that young love tends to be. It didn't feel like it was focused on pushing love between character x and y as the objective; rather, it felt more real. A story about two broken souls reaching out to anyone who might understand them, finding each other, and finding healing together in the process.
Blah, what am I blabbing about? I'm certainly not qualified to critically examine fics or anything... All I know is what I got out of it. Complaints would be that Scoots felt a bit out of character to me, or at least out of age. My mind kept imagining a 13 year old Scoots in this story over a 9-ish one. Also seemed like she was escalating things like crazy, but I'm certainly no expert on how that real life stuff works >_< And where did everyone go during that time that they were hanging out alot? No acknowledgement from Sweetie/Bloom about where she's been, or teasing in class? All small things that were on my mind, but understandably left untouched.
Anyways, thanks for the good read. Short, sweet, cute, sad undertones, but a happy ending. Left me with a smile on my face in the end. Love ya always Scoots, now go have fun with Rumble
3234462
Just do what I do. I've already worked this story into my own mental EoP pseudo-fanon, until such a time as the actually story proves it otherwise hehe XD
Skirtsaloo? Romantic Skirtsaloo? Cannot love enough.
Rumbaloo? Commencing instantaneous read expecting to like and fave.
Well, I suppose that in a society with no nudity taboos, short skirts wouldn't have the same appeal.
In any case, a most adorable story. "The grease is beautiful" is at once the funniest, the most adorable, and the most heartwarming thing I've read today. Though I admit, I was expecting something like that on Apple Bloom's rear end...
Eh. Happy orange minipone is best orange minipone. Thank you for giving us some.
Lastly, what is it with you and fuzzy ears?
3234397
Derpibooru uses "Rumbloo" as the tag for the pairing.
3234397 I like Scrumble.
Slow clap...
I love how you make them right for each other beyond both liking pegasus stuff. It's really cute how Scoots is all "you can be like boy yknow, cuz that's what I'm supposed to like" and Rumbles all "you're allowed to be girly" and scoots is like "huh, you're right, I never thought of that".
Poop got pretty heavy towards the end. It's your tragic implications of family problems and physical deformities that will keep this rattling in my skull.
It is good to finally see some Rumbleloo that isn't the heart-crushing angsty bullshit I write. This fic just made me feel so goddamn happy.
Ah, young love. The only reason I didn't favorite this sooner is because I was too busy reading. Shipping is hard to do well, but you pulled it off spectacularly. How can you write something so good in under a day, when it takes me over a month to write something half as long?
Also:
As a wise pony once said, "Don't ever sell yourself short."
3235119 As do I!
Anyways, I was listening to this song, and this fic popped up in my head. Because I had just read it.
But still. For your listening enjoyment.
3235441 Sufjan Stevens is pretty much my favorite modern song writer besides Paul Simon.
3235734 He deserves more exposure. His work is just so heartfelt and beautifully painful.
Wonderful for reinterpretation, too. Rumble can be the narrator and Scootaloo the wasp.
Not bad at all.
Daww.
You know, I can definitely say I'd love a sequel to this. Of course, I'd love to see sequels to a lot of stuff, but that has yet to happen 99% of the time... Maybe you could use Sweetie Belle as a focus for a story within this universe?
Where's Twistclops?????????????????????
Simply amazing. And cute, too. Now I feel like reading romance all day long.
3236134
Do yourself a favor and just end it on a high note.
3236247 that is so god damn true... its usually all ether clop, or ones that throw you into a hole and fill it with feels cement
3234397 Scrumble that bitch
HNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNG
Have some feels
I've been following you for a long time, man. Since multiple fandoms ago. So you can probably appreciate the gravity of the statement when I say this in my new favorite piece of yours I've ever read, in any fandom. Absolutely precious, and very well done. Much like Spelling it Out, you take subtle shipping to an art form, even moreso with young characters barely aware of what love and attraction even IS.
Thanks for cluing me in to how adorable Rumble/Scootaloo is.
--CG
The FEEEEEEELS!
Pssst, you mean 'red'.
3234895
Fuzzy ears are rather endearing. While possibly unintentional, he tends to utilise them as a base method in forming an emotional connection to the primary female who is the emotional forecast for the story. When utilised multiple times throughout a story, they're used as a method to retain a good connection, or even strengthen it, over a series of chapters that require a stronger connection so as to allow the turmoil to remain potent with even the gaps of time between readings. Because of this, he can easily play with the Heartstrings as he's wont to do.
Really though, they're a drug carrier. Get used to it.
Oh my God I love this story! So much talent and oh so enjoyable. Another one for my favorite list!
The world will never know now, and that is why you will be remembered for all time as the world's most horrible person.
Honestly, the story really didn't do anything for me. I think it was the voice of the characters that ruined it for me. They didn't sound the right age, if that makes any sense. Scoots especially sounded very world weary. Not really an elementary school student.
Man, this is good. I love a little foal romance. There were a few OOC moments, but that's nothing much to mind. I love how you shaped these guys, and that metaphor with the silver lining really hit home. A little bittersweet ending to tie things off, and you have your fic. Well done.
I'll give you a follow, I'm all for reading more of your stuff. Keep up the good work.
oh man that was adorable! i do love these sorts of romances
any plans for a sequel?
3242951 gotta love portal 2!
Why are you always so mean to Sweetie Belle? Gosh!
But anyway, this was super-duper cute. You really captured the innocence of young love, and even the way you told the story accentuated the youthfulness of it - a sort of silliness of tone, tempered, as it was, by more dramatic, emotional elements, which you balanced well. Your pacing, while characteristically leisurely, never dragged, and gave a sense of naturalness to the development of their relationship which kept it from feeling forced. And the final scene was a really nice payoff to the whole thing.
If I had one complaint, it would be the characterization, especially regarding Scootaloo. As someone else said, she felt a little too old. Maybe that ties into whatever trauma or loneliness it's suggested she's experienced, but it's hard to imagine the show's Scootaloo doing or saying some of the things from this story. Not that that's the damnable sin some people make it out to be - I've never been one for manacling fan content to canon at the end of a hayfork - but it almost tripped the story up a little in this instance.
That pseudo-complaint aside, I really enjoyed this. It's nice to have stories like this to tide us over as we wait for funerals and cellists and temporally-challenged yardbirds. And sub-par crackfic or not, I hope you continue Twistclops. It'd be a shame for it to go the way of BDO (
which I'd still like to see finished, btw).4.bp.blogspot.com/-vEc4MGUJ9yM/UHd-zDeCmEI/AAAAAAAAESo/rb10CmnnmbE/s640/tumblr_m375i8CsgD1r5yyzuo4_r1_500.jpg
Love it, but 2 small problems.
1. You used 'uhhh' and 'ummm' a lot. It was distracting, and felt like that was most of the dialogue.
2. Needs more! I wanna' see actual Rumble/Scootaloo romance. playing coy is all well and good, but I need me some payoff.
First off, apologies for my rusty review. It's been ages since I've read other people's fan fiction, so it's hard fighting that temptation to compare your writing style to mine's.
Generally, this was an okay to good fic. The dialogue between Rumbles and Scootaloo had some humorous moments and I had enough details to picture the scene -- a little on the short side but okay given the story's relative pace. I did notice a heavy use of ellipsis, maybe too much. It's actually something I'm guilty of as well and after reading your story, I understand better how visually distracting those can be from a reader's perspective. You could either rework the dialogue or use commas instead.
Characterization, that was a little iffy. There's not much I can say with anypony other than Scoots/Rumbles since they're mainly ancillary characters. I will say that Snips and Snails teasing Rumbles early in the story feels right even though my mind says otherwise. With the two protagonists, my main issue is what I notice with a fair number of other fics involving the CMC and other schoolchildren. What they say and do makes sense if they were much older except they're just small fillies and colts. I could buy Rumbles as he's essentially a clean slate but I had much more trouble believing the Scoots you presented is the same as the one we see in the show. I'm not saying that I didn't like the presentation; it's that this Scootaloo is somewhat meaner and more glum. I'd even say that she's been transformed into a Tsudere whereas she might be someday but not at that point yet.
Finally, the ending was a little too abrupt and it actually had me scratching my head. Not sure why. I may have to read the last section again for clarification.
Anyways, I did enjoy reading this. Some cleverness and humor mixed it although I had some "Huh?" moments.
Awwwww....
If this wasn't just downright adorable, I don't know what is.
...wow...the ending was just...wow...pure poetry...
Interesting story. In the beginning when you were writing about how people who just had fun became weirdo, that really applied to the last five years of my life. It is so true, and it reeled me into the rest of the story.
Awww...Scoots and Rumble romance. And little kid romance too! (Not that fakey 'seem-too-mature-for-their-age' crap. Gotta love their little arguments~)
Thanks for the cute story skirts!
This story was amazing, dont call it junk. Can you make a sequal, I honestly can say it was that good. Im begging you, make another one about these two!!!
I can definitely get behind any steampunk contraption that launches elephants into the sky.