• Member Since 23rd Apr, 2020
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Mockingbirb


A pony of mystery in the darkness. Or I forgot to take the lens cap off. (They/them is fine.)

T
Source

When Equestria is infiltrated by changelings, the only solution is to starve them out. No matter how long it takes.

Content Warning: See story title.


(It's 1000 words long...I guess I could enter it in the contest.)

(#1000words 1000words 1000 words)

Chapters (1)
Comments ( 9 )

I regret that I have but one like to give this story. Because it was a riot.

Social media and texting were a little different in Equestria. Instead of fancy, high-tech mobile phones, or dragonfire messaging that almost nopony had their own dragon for, the usual method was to write a note, roll it up, put the note inside a long, hollowed-out cork, shove the cork inside the end of a message tube, and blow really hard.

"Pomp!" An arriving message flew out of a receiving tube, and struck the opposite wall of Pinkie's "party planning cave." The cave where she used to plan fun times for dozens or even hundreds of ponies to celebrate all together.

Yeah, I can see they would use that to send messages.

But Pinkie had NEEDS. A LOT of ponies had needs. Even if she couldn't get her loving snuggles and nuzzles and scritches, NON-loving snuggles and...other stuff...were better than nothing at all.

Cuddle deficiency is a horrible illness!

Do you love me?
o Yes
o No
o Buck off
o Buck you (just an expression)
o Buck you (I really mean it! Like, right now, you stupid bucker!)

P.S. You're ugly and stupid and I already hate you too.

Hate,
Zephyr Breeze

At least he's self-aware.

Zephyr being a changeling, a being who wants love but can't give it, makes too much sense.

Anyways, thanks for a good laugh!

I should be mad about Zephyr dying, but the rest of the story was too good. :rainbowlaugh:

A enforced lockdown on physical affection (now why does that feel familiar)? :duck:

Zephyr Breeze being a Changeling (which makes way too much sense). :derpyderp1:

And poor cuddly Pinkie Pie having to deal with a snuggles withdrawal. :pinkiecrazy:

Truly a master piece that I was privileged to read. Thanks for writing!:twilightsmile:

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Warning to readers! At least one spoiler in the comments, sorry.

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It is extremely fixed now, thanks. :twilightblush:

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While I am leaving comments (and unfortunately diluting other comments that I like better than mine), please let me say that I enjoy your detailed appreciative comments so much! Even if I'm so grumpy-fussy about spoilers.

I just hope some ponies don't decide the infiltration is over long before it actually is, go out for big cuddle parties, and cause a resurgence even worse than the first wave.

But really, who'd be silly enough to do that?

Bizarre, but definitely entertaining. Thank you for it and best of luck in the judging.

Social media and texting were a little different in Equestria. Instead of fancy, high-tech mobile phones, or dragonfire messaging that almost nopony had their own dragon for, the usual method was to write a note, roll it up, put the note inside a long, hollowed-out cork, shove the cork inside the end of a message tube, and blow really hard.

hehehe, that is a very accessible pony solution to this, yes

But Pinkie had NEEDS. A LOT of ponies had needs. Even if she couldn't get her loving snuggles and nuzzles and scritches, NON-loving snuggles and...other stuff...were better than nothing at all.

oof, Pinkie is down bad!

o Buck off
o Buck you (just an expression)
o Buck you (I really mean it! Like, right now, you stupid bucker!)

i appreciate the precision in communication here. also that the effect of a list is replicated by using just the letter "o"

"Hmm," Pinkie said to herself. "Zephyr is Fluttershy's brother, isn't he? He's a real jerk. I hate him. But I NEED my...physical stuff."

Pinkie is down really bad!

Pinkie walked up an escape tunnel, unlocked the tunnel's several locks, went out the door, and relocked everything behind her.

dang, just how bad did the Changeling infestation get?

"No! Bad Pinkie! Don't try to make ponies smile! If you make ponies smile, they might LOVE you. And you know what happens then!"

heartbreaking to see Pinkie pre-emptively blame herself like this :(

She imagined the changeling queen, Chrysalis, laughing and cackling, sucking up love energy into an enormous egg or cocoon or something...Pinkie wasn't too clear on the specifics of how that worked. But she knew it was something bad!

hehe, this does feel very much like a peek into the mind of Pinkie Pie

"I knew you couldn't stay away." He leered. "No mare can resist the 'cool Breeze.'"

so Zephyr Breeze, i both hate him and love him

Breeze tossed his long blonde hair, posing unattractively.

i like to think that this is not the result of the narration being reflective of Pinkie's perceptions because it is close-in on her perspective, but rather an objective description of the world

"This is a whole new world, and everything's different. Now everypony wants me. I'm practically a social amenity, like a public bathroom."

you know what, i honestly can't tell if this is a self-own or not

Zephyr said, "The reason I've always acted the way I do is, I'm not CAPABLE of feeling love for anypony other than myself. And I'm no good at faking it, either."

that is a really neat worlbuilding idea, that in a world under siege by Changelings, ponies that can disconnect displays of affection and actually feeling affection would have a useful skill to give to ponies that i can easily see would see that as a "need". and i guess this makes Zephyr the closest thing Equestria has to a sex worker? there are very many layers here and it is fascinating to think about in terms of what the analogues to all these pieces would be in the human world...

The interrupter proclaimed, "This is a STING! Ha ha ha, what a pun. I amuse even myself."

hehe, nice

When he was the size of a mouse, Twilight leaped out from behind a bush, clapped a jar over him, and fastened the lid to trap him inside.

and now you've gone ahead and put a pegasus in a jar...

Fluttershy came out from behind another bush. "My family always used to give him air holes before, when he was a bad little colt and he misbehaved and we 'grounded' him in our giant bug jar." She shook her head. "And he never learned to behave any better. So let's try WITHOUT air holes."

now that just raises further questions!

Pinkie gazed up woozily. "Really, Fluttershy? You let Twilight kill your own brother?"

Fluttershy shrugged. "I thought I cared about every little creature in the whole world, but I guess even I have my limits."

and oof, way to twist the knife! now this is how you give characters very out-of-character moments, for the purposes of heightening a cynically absurd comedic bit

The reason Zephyr Breeze can't move out of his parents' house is, nocreature else will ever love him and he'll die. True story! Just ask the writing team!
:trollestia:

and your Commentary on aspects of the show writing really is spot-on here! i have nothing to say that could possibly contest this.


very fun stuff, combining an out-there and interesting worldbuilding premise with the logical conclusions of how one of Equestria's least savory characters would fit into it. thank you for writing!

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