Trixie's showpony act is just that--an act. Dissatisfied with her lack of power (and inability to live up to her late mother's hopes for her) she seeks magic relics and objects. Her search leads her back to her late mother's collection--but there's a catch. The collection is in the hooves of her estranged father and his new family.
Trixie must face her past, her father, a newly discovered sister, and the Everfree Forrest on her journey towards being "Great and Powerful".
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My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
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You've already heard what I had to say about this story but I'll say what I can remember once again.
You gave good substance to the story, you didn't just say, "Hey this is her folks! That's that." You explained her well as to why she acted how she did.
On to my nit pick. SS seems a little OOC with how subdued she seemed. Her trick worked well though to fit her character. Now I'm just basing this off of how she has been shown therefore I have no way to know how she would act around family and the like. Overall I did like this.
I would also like to say that I would like to see a continuation of this of a day of Trixie and SS together about town. I think it could be quite adorable.
That's my piece. Later.
-YBG
and if you havn't figured it out by now.
fc08.deviantart.net/fs70/i/2011/317/e/2/cheerilee_is_not_amused____by_blackgryph0n-d4g1dv8.png
I enjoyed this! This is a great backstory for Trixie, you've certainly given her a more complex and interesting character than we see in the show. There were times where things were rushed, though, places where a little more backstory could have helped tons. I understand you had a deadline. So maybe you could add onto it later, or have some sort of continuation?
2393075
I might indeed add more at some point. Glad you enjoyed it!
Trixie was a little OOC in the fact that she just accepted that Silver Spoon duped her into spending time with her. I mean she held a grudge against Twilight just for saving the town when she could not herself.
Now perhaps she admires the fillie's cunning and the fact that Silver's plan worked despite Trixie doing her hardest to hate Silver. But as you said, the last chapter was rather rushed whereas the chapters before where highly detailed an well planned out.
also her hatred for her fathers wife and disdain for Silver Spoon in the beginning came off as pure racism more then family history. I'm not sure but I cant help the feeling that Trixe would have been more receptive having her father mary another unicorn and having her sister be a uni as well.
Maybe it's not racism but a belief in keeping the race pure. I think there's a difference between hating a race and not being comfortable with mixed marriages.
All an all it was great story.
I love how cunning and yet adorable Silver Spoon was and I can only guess that the eye and mane color was inherited from the father. I would love to see more of these two.
This is really good overall and I would more in this universe!