As the time of heroes come to a close in my world I can feel the need for a hero in an alternate world. As for the hero in question well... can she live up to her self given title of The Great and Powerful?
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Lastofakind
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I read this on Fanfiction.net and loved it when I tried to find this here I was sad but here it is so I hope.
"Our story continues."-Theresa
I find this story very interesting. Favorite pony in one of my favorite video games. Hellz yeah!
I read the description and the only thing going through my mind at that moment was yes.
2830079
Haha thanks hope you enjoy the read
I can already see the respective roles in this story.
Gilda is the hero of strength.
Octavia is hero of skill. Reason me thinks she is cause she can play the cello. But her skill is locked.
Dirk is good ole sir Walter beck.
Theresa is the seer which is self explanatory. Although the seer role should belong to Gabriel from the journey. Though this story was made before the release of that game.
I can see this story is coming along great. Can I ask will there be certain items from fable like the guild seal?
Ah, Listbutt McJerkass. I was guessing some stupid and unlikable person was behind that, and there you were. Who gave a glorified mailroom clerk military authority, anyway?
I haven't actually played any Fable, so I'm lost there, but I'm hoping you'll provide relevant information when needed. So far I'm probably not more confused about things than Trixie and company.
The writing could be better. There's intermittent typos, bad grammar, and incorrect use of apostrophes. Not overwhelmingly so, but enough that it's noticeable. You could do well to recruit a prereader, or at least run the chapters through the spellchecker in MS Word.
The premise, disregarding my ignorance of Fable, is very interesting. Trixie gathers faithful companions and proves her true heroic nature. She's my favorite pony, so I like to see her be heroic. The whole idea of her having untapped potential and being held back by past mistakes is very interesting. Likewise Gilda is portrayed interestingly. We get to see how she treats somepony who's earned her respect, probably like how she treated Rainbow Dash before they had their falling out. Nice to see Gilda being some semblance of natural self, instead of a huge jerk or a woobie.
Octavia is an interesting addition and I hope to see good things of her. It's always fun to have the one sane guy who's just dragged along for the ride. Dirk likewise has potential, and he has yet to be an overbearing Mary Sue who gets all the mares, which is always good. Thumbs up for him too.
All in all, a good story so far. The writing could be better, as I said, but I like it and will follow it.
3431775
Thank you, your review has been very helpful
I'm going to try and answer questions as the story goes on so don't worry about that. My goal is that even if you never played Fable you should still be able to pick up on it.
Time to fight the creatures of Albion. Whether it be Hobbe ponies, undead, Balverines, Bandits, or even a troll. We will see if what lies ahead will be the end or the beginning of this Journey.
Na you forgot your first enemies in fable 2 are beetles not to say their pushovers but they do go pretty easily also does trixie need her horn to cast will spells i don't know anywho here's hoping that nothing BAD happens
3539961
You ask a good question sir
>>LastofakindI ask cause she couldn't use will magic until Theresa "taped" her potential I personally believe if she loses her horn her will will grow stronger maybe even as strong as Garth
Doing good so far but your battles need a little work that was nowhere near as tense as a first fight should be oh well hopefully you can improve on that not necessarily more gore just more action you know like the last part you could easily have made it where gilda suddenly jumped on the stallion making it where he had to turn in order to shake gilda giving trixie the split second she needed in order to make the "money shot" now this is soully my opinion so please take this with a grain of salt also i can now definitely say you are writing off of fable 2 good day looking forward to future updates you ever annoying fan, arthur(five gold if you get the reference.)
You have done well my friend the horde of enemy Mechanical Beetles is a great starter enemy along with that dare I call it assassin at the end.
So let me guess. Trixie is the Hero skill will and strength or just will. Gilda is strength Octy is Skill and Will is still a mystery.
3651395 to answer your question
2846859 Has been the closest so far
Finally my good old friend steel katana and steel turret rifle!
Ahh good ole assassin's.
Go Iron Will! Say what you want about the guy, but he's awesome.