Before he returned to his land, Scorpan went to see his brother in Tartarus. Scorpan decides it's time the two had a talk.
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Now, that was awesome! You captured Scorpan and Tirek's personalities perfectly.
Scorpan - A benevolent gargoyle that only wants peace and loves his brother no matter what he says or does.
Tirek - An irredeemable, power-hungry monster that would destroy the entire world just for more power.
The way the two verbally clashed was expertly done. Although, you may want to work on your sentence structure. Regardless, this was really good.
8100122 too many commas?
8100192 No. I was referring to the fact that a lot of the sentences blended together when they shouldn't have been.