Forced to leave her peaceful hometown and flee for her life alongside a mysterious orphan filly named Primrose, New Equestrian war-veteran Scarlet Frost will have to use every resource at her disposal just to stay alive.
Princess Twilight Sparkle has done something unheard of: she's found a changeling right outside Canterlot borders! But much to his surprise, Twilight saves his life. And when life gives you lemons, you will feed.
The Apocalypse Ponies: War, Famine, Pestilence, and Death. How did they become the mystical beings of the Apocalypse? This is a collection of their tales, the Origins of the Apocalypse Ponies.
I am Nox, the strongest Xelor, or Time mage alive. Or rather, I became him. Like him, I lost my family, but unlike him THEY weren't taken from me, I was taken from them. I will find my home or I'll make a new one and change this world.
My headcanon is that Changelings don't talk. Haven't seen any evidence to challenge that. Thanks to Super_Big_Mac and Biker_Dash for editing and pre-reading. Go give them a follow!
I think my main problem is that it's dissociative - I can't empathise with the main character 'it', so I find it hard to care about the story. I'm not wild about telling the exciting opening sequence as a 'description to the reader'... it kind of kills any tension in that. Also... maybe this is just me, but I didn't get the ending.
I'm really, really sorry.
PS: There's what seems to be an uncapitalised 'it' at the head of the second sentence back from the end of the second paragraph.
perhaps, the changeling should have a name? association is a big part of these kind of pictures. give the changeling a name and perhaps dialogue? heck, i liked it... despite the changeling missing its leg, and the gashes and other assortments, but i like it. keep it up.
2043805 One of the ideas I had surrounding the making of this fic was that the fandom had done too many "changeling turn good" scenarios. I was so sick of that I decided to write from the ACTUAL canon for the changelings; just mindless drones following a Queen.
My headcanon is that Changelings don't talk. Haven't seen any evidence to challenge that.
Thanks to Super_Big_Mac and Biker_Dash for editing and pre-reading. Go give them a follow!
1704680
I can't. I already am.
Please... no applause. Just throw lots of bits in my direction. I also take Paypal and credit cards.
Cover art is from Ackdari Go check out his stuff!
Hi,
Sorry, I don't like it.
I think my main problem is that it's dissociative - I can't empathise with the main character 'it', so I find it hard to care about the story. I'm not wild about telling the exciting opening sequence as a 'description to the reader'... it kind of kills any tension in that. Also... maybe this is just me, but I didn't get the ending.
I'm really, really sorry.
PS: There's what seems to be an uncapitalised 'it' at the head of the second sentence back from the end of the second paragraph.
perhaps, the changeling should have a name? association is a big part of these kind of pictures. give the changeling a name and perhaps dialogue? heck, i liked it... despite the changeling missing its leg, and the gashes and other assortments, but i like it. keep it up.
2043805 One of the ideas I had surrounding the making of this fic was that the fandom had done too many "changeling turn good" scenarios. I was so sick of that I decided to write from the ACTUAL canon for the changelings; just mindless drones following a Queen.
2044847 tho i see what you mean, i think it should atleast gain some personality