841752
1. Facet

2. Facet has a ruby red coat with emerald green eyes, and a sapphire blue mane with amethyst highlights in a well maintained cut that doesn't get in his face. His cutie mark is a paint pallet with seven gems arranged in the pattern of the rainbow, with a hammer and chisel sticking out from behind it and crossed over each other.

2.1. Male

2.2. Unicorn

3. His backstory has variations depending on the story he appears in, but one constant is being Rarity's twin brother, using a dye spell to alter his color scheme and distinguish himself from Rarity. A Ponyville native, he struck out on his own and attained a scholarship to attend the renowned Canterlot School of Arts as a colt. It was during his time in Canterlot that he had a chance encounter with Twilight Sparkle, which consisted of them bumping into each other while walking due to their respective distractions, (her reading and him drawing something). Awkwardly apologizing to each other, they soon went their separate ways, but Facet developed a crush on Twilight, which showed itself in his work. He didn't stalk her, but did maintain a special place in his heart for her, and acknowledged that she had become his muse. After Luna's redemption, he decided to get back to his roots and returned to Ponyville, opening an art studio next to Sugarcube Corner. During his welcome party he once again encountered Twilight. They weren't as awkward as when they first met, but the meeting confirmed for Facet what he had always known deep down. That he was deeply, and utterly in love with Twilight.

4. Like with backstory, Facet's personality is often influenced by the work he appears in. For example, his appearance in my Fallout: Equestria side story. In which he is a broken and tired old soldier who survived the war and has become a cold death seeker with nearly zero fucks to give about the people around him. Which is made difficult because, much to his ire, he's a glutton for punishment who just won't fucking die. On the whole though, Facet is a very compassionate pony who can always be counted on for support, even if he does have an oftentimes snarky demeanor.

5. Facet is one of those rare few ponies whose talent is a concept, in this case, art itself. Usually this means he's found plying his trade as a painter and sculptor, but if something can be called an art form, he can master it.

6. As stated earlier, he's Rarity's fraternal twin, and cares very much for his sisters. Though even he is prone to rolling his eyes at Rarity's mellowdrama. He's on friendly terms with the rest of the Mane Six, and as stated above, loves Twilight like no other. Whether or not he's in the friend zone depends on the story, but his love and loyalty to that mare know no bounds. Even if the entire world turns against her, Facet will never doubt or betray Twilight. If I had to pick one trope to describe his connection to Twilight, it would be Undying Loyalty.

7. Again, this depends on the story. The only OCs he's really interacted with in my stories thus far are the four sisters that serve as the protagonists of my FOE story, and the relationship thus far has been... less than ideal since he's mostly been a dick to them.

8. When not making art, either commissioned or just because he felt some inspiration, Facet can often be found in the company of Twilight Sparkle enjoying a good book, some tea, and generally enjoying the company of the mare he loves.

9. Again depends on where he appears. In my FOE story, he's best described as the deuteragonist. While he's a major player in the story, being the guide to the Wasteland noob sisters, it's their story, not his. But at the same time, he has his own character arc that delves into his past and the role he played in the Great War. In my Deus Ex crossover, he's a support character. And in my ponies as pirates story, he shares the protagonist role with Twilight.

10. To be completely honest, Facet's creation was with a twofold purpose in mind. First, his talent being art itself allows him to fill whatever role I need him to fill for a given story, from hacker in Deus Ex: Equine Revengeance to badass soldier in Fallout: Equestria - Waking to Hell. The second was simple wish fulfillment. Which manifests in him being kin to Rarity and getting shipped with Twilight.

3296968 Um... Here I go. First of all, you have a pretty good OC here. Nice and rounded. However, I would reccomended either removing his sister status with Rarity or crush on Twilight before you write a whole story on him. Many readers dislike OCs having crushes on the mane six. All in all, 5/10.

3279996

Design: To me, the word "Autumn" brings to mind dull colors like darkish red, dull orange, and brown like leaves that have a floaty feel to them. Though the Autumn's color scheme is kinda vague (word like "yellow" and "red" leave a lot to the imagination) the you describe her makes her seem like a pony that would be much better named "Firey-Fire Blazing Sun Fire (the third)" maybe tone her down a bit (and add some brown, because brown feels left out now). The metal wings are cool to think about, but if you were a reader with no knowledge of Autumn other than her design, what time period would you place her? Me, I'd say around Fallout Apocalyptica Equestria A.D. But noo, she's from freaking Pre-HWE! I just...I can't imagine a metal wing-ed pony standing next to a bunch of peasant pegasi, and that's not even getting into the crimes against practicality these wings commit. If she's suppose to be an assassin, wouldn't those wings make her preeeeetty notable (along with her glaring coloration), especially around peasent pegasi, if she were in the dark they could glint moonlight or something off of them, how flexible are they? Assassins have to be really flexible in order to pull off their jobs, they must at least be uncomfortable and at most, clunky and dead weight. And speaking of dead-weight, how is she suppose to fly with metal wings? How heavy are they? If she can still fly, I'd bet she can't fly as fast as a normal pegasi, which would get her caught in ten seconds flat. Not to mention they showcase her most powerful weapon for all to gaze upon, taking away her element of surprise. Come to think of it, how does Pre-HWE Equestria come up with the technology/magic spells to make functional metal feathers? Can she manipulate the feathers like you would normal feathers? Because if she can't, that adds another item to the list of common sense blunders these wings create (sorry, I just went off on a tangent about the wings, I may seem angry, but I'm not really) Then the cutie mark, green on an orange coat doesn't look good, just no. I know it's suppose to look poisoned, but you could use other colors like red...or brown, brown is lonely again.

Backstory: What a polite way of saying "SPOILER SPOILER SPOILER"

Personality: I was really surprised when I saw Autumn was the antagonist, she has all the trademark qualities of a cliche Mary Sue badass. She undermines and goes against her superiors, she's a badass assassin, she has a dark (yet probably badass) past, she has badass looking body modifications to help her be an assassin, she's pretty mean and cold, and she enjoys manipulating others and exploiting weaknesses. This is all a pretty fool proof recipe for down vote (and also "kill it with fire"), but somehow, you changed it, by simply making her the antagonist, it feels strides more realistic (because really, if someone were like this in real life, they would not be a "good guy")

Score: 6/10, good start, but needs a tune up and some thought and checking before thrusting her out into the world

3313561 also, speaking of the wings, I'd assume the dagger feathers are pretty sharp, how does she hide or move or stay in any position without carefully planning out how to keep herself without accidentally stabbing herself, and that's not even assuming they are poison-laced

3313578 How'd you guess they had poison? Anyway, thanks for the tips. I'll get around to tuning her up. Thanks for the advice.

3313625 happy to help

1. Lapis Lasuli
2 She is blue, with shining coat made of sapphire and her cutie mark is a piece of broken stained glass
2.2. Pegasus (Crystal Pony)
3. She met rarity in the crystal empire and got intrigued of the elements of harmony.
4. She's a bit snappy sometimes, but usually she's really cheery.
5. She works with glass. Stained glass, to be exact. SOMEPONY'S got to make all those stain glass windows for Celestia, Amirite?
6. She knows the mane 6, but doesn't have any sort if relationship with one. She also ships Celestia and Luna her stained glass. She stated that she did not purposefully let discord personify one of her windows
7. Googol (a mathematician unicorn) has a crush on her
8. She knows a prince on a first-name basis (the main character of my fic)
9. A supporting character to the main character

1. Thaddeus Cinnamon Mills IV

2. He's on the left

3. Backstory. Son of a prominent miller in Applewood. Spent time in Canterlot and Ponyville before moving back. Recently moved to Ponyville after aged father passed away. Wife died several years ago.

4. Personality. Calm, tries to remain neutral.However, holds grudges almost to an obsessive level.

5. Special abilities, especially what they do for a living from their cutie mark. Are they A GOD OF LIGHTNING, or are they a simple baker? Miller, can take a beating

6. Relations with canon characters. Distant cousin of Rainbow Dash. Despises Rarity.

7. Relations with other OC's, if there are any. : Wife, Silver Streak- lightning weather pegasus. Fireball daughter sister. Thaddeus Mills III, father.

8. Social life. Workaholic. Only recently has he had free time. Likes to read, play with Fireball. Not many friends, but a lot of business contacts.

9. How they will be placed in their story. (I.E. Main character, supporting character, a simple one-chapter gag, etc.) Main character

10. Fireball is unsure who her parents are, was adopted by Thaddeus III and thinks Cinnamon is her brother. Cinnamon has an extreme hatred for anyone who appears to be an elitist.

3314995 I'm not sure if you purposefully spelled Lapis Lazuli wrong, or just did not know how to spell it/typo (no problem, it's not like Lapis Lazuli is a word commonly used or easy to spell)

Design: as with Smaug the golden's OC
( 3313625 I put your name in italics because you're just so special) words like "blue" "red" and "yellow" feel very vague, but I'm just going with the color of sapphires because (even though her name is Lapis Lazuli) her coat is "made of" the stuff. Speaking of that, if her coat is made of sapphires, why isn't she called "Sapphire"? However, that's just a little nitpick.

Also, I don't think a Pegasus-crystal pony has ever been shown to exist on the show, I though they were all just earth ponies by default.

I, personally, am quite fond of this design, she doesn't stand out too much against other crystal ponies and has all the features she needs to perform her job, without any unneeded, impractical, or cliche add ons. Truly, when creating an OC, less is more (design-wise)

However, when describe your OC, less is never more. All I know about Sapphire Lapis is that she has a blue coat and a glass cutie mark (oh, and she's a crystal pony) I could create hundreds of different ponies with those qualifications on pony creator alone. What's her mane style? Her tail length? Her mane color? Her eye color? The color of the cutie mark? These would be very helpful in destroying critiquing your OC.

Lastly, the cutie mark, broken glass of indefinite color, personally, that really makes me want to hear that story of that one. "Why is it broken?" Is my main question that-you-don't-necessarily-have-to-answer-because that-was-a-rhetorical-question *exhale*. As for the design choice, it makes sense, good job.

Backstory: Lapis' backstory is kind of laughable, glass maker for the princesses, I never actually thought about who makes all that stained glass (must have been a real pain in the glass to make *bum dum tiss*). Although, it does conflict canon a little, seeing as all that glass shows profecies that around really really old (let's leave it at that) or at least older than the episode where they discover the empire. (Or maybe she was glass maker for them a hundred years ago and then got put under Sombra's spell and recently got back to her job or something)

Personality: I'd bet you'd have to have a pretty upbeat personality to bear a job like she has. If I had that job, I'd also be pretty snappy, maybe more details, and a few flaws would be good.

Other stuff: "knows a prince on a first name basis" so what? Are we just going to touch on that? No "he's her childhood friend" "she bumped into him in a street or something" "he save her from ogres (or the other way around)" although, I wouldn't consider it very far-fetched for the royal glass maker to know royalty, I just need some sort of explanation, or some way he's important other than something I guess she would brag about at parties. (Or street-cred in the stain glass community)

"Googol has a crush on her" sounds incredibly cute, want to read.

Score: 9/10 (don't take this as a serious score, I had extremely little to work with from your description) sounds like she's ready, she's relatable, likable and charming in every sense of the word. Readers can try, but they won't find something to hate about her as a character, it's just so hard to hate her simple personality that isn't dressed up or requires support, job well done.

Freeze! Stop patting your ego, and consider giving her more detail, she needs to be more fleshed out like a real person (pony?) and tweaked to perfection

I hereby submit my OC for judgement, be as harsh as you like.

1. Ivory (Keys) Philharmonica

2. Ivory is a teenage filly (Sweetie Belle's body shape/horn, but a bit taller), with a white coat and light violet eyes. Her mane shape is similar to Twilight Sparkle's, but it has black and white stripes (like Twilight Velvet's).

2.1. Female

2.2. Unicorn

3. Ivory Keys was born (and is still being raised) in Canterlot along with her sister, who, despite having almost nothing in common, share a tight bond. She began to learn to play the piano at an early age under the guidance of her mother, Octavia Philharmonica. Ivory had mastered it almost as soon as she began to play, and was the first filly in her class to earn her cutie mark. Soon after she had completed all of her lessons, she was accepted into the Canterlot academy of Arts and Music, one of the most exclusive academies in all Equestria.

4. Despite her being a Canterlot filly, Ivory Keys isn't that much of a snob(she really doesn't like to get her hooves dirty though, and does have some Canterlot class.). Ivory's an extrovert with an upbeat, cheery persona, and she's a bit naive, but she cares for her friends and family very, very much. She's extremely sensitive and fragile, though, and doesn't take criticism or insults lightly. She is also scared very easily.

5. Ivory is a very good pianist, and possesses a singing voice that could rival that of the Princesses. She is rather lacking in the physical department, with little strength and slightly below average flexibility.

6. Ivory Keys is Octavia and Vinyl Scratch's second daughter, but other than that, has no relations to canon characters.

7. Ivory Keys is Platinum Record's younger sister.

8. When Ivory isn't playing the piano or stalking her sister, she's playing games with her friends, having sleepovers, shopping, or posing for one of Sketch Ink's drawings. (Sketch Ink is Ivory's best friend.)

9. Main Character or Supporting Character, depending on which story I put her in.

10. Sketch Ink has a huge crush on her :3

3315510

let me try again
1. Lapis Lazuli
2
Imagine this as a crystal pony with a crimson piece of stain glass for a cutie mark. not good enough photoshop skills to make it a crystal pony on my computer also couldnt find the right cutie mark.
3. She met rarity in the crystal empire and got intrigued by the elements of harmony. She was imprisoned in time by king sombra for a thousand years, thanks to you. I hadn't originally planned for this, so ill give you a shoutout in the story
4. She's a bit snappy sometimes after an unusually long day of work, but most of the time she's really cheery.
5. She works with glass. Stained glass, to be exact. SOMEPONY'S got to make all those stain glass windows for Celestia, Amirite?
6. She knows the mane 6, but doesn't have any sort if relationship with one. She also ships Celestia and Luna her stained glass. She stated that she did not purposefully let discord personify one of her windows
7. Googol (a mathematician unicorn) has a crush on her, but she doesn't notice.
8. She knows a prince (the main character of my fic) and goes on adventures with him. She barely gets out due to her work, so whenever she gets to she's really excited, and talks to everypony she gets the chance to.
9. A supporting character to the main character

Prepare yourselves. This will be a doozey. This was quite the pain to edit down.

Meet Silhouette Dusk, my first OC
1. (Full) name: Empress Silhouette Dusk

2. I'd post a picture, but it's not letting me.
She's an alicorn OC (duh). Between Celestia and Luna size. Dark Onyx coat, just above shoulder length silvery grey mane & tail with long bangs & red highlights. Hooves will have a red stocking pattern to them. She'll have a more stylized edgier anime-esq facial style, w/ red eyes that have a piecing sort of gaze to them. She'll have a large wingspan, her feathers having red tips. Her wings will be less like your stereotypical Pegasus, and more like a dark angels wings, the size of them unfurled will give her a more domineering presence. She also tends to wear grey & red princess wear, usually in the style of armor, like higher shoes/boots, a mid-evil breastplate and a segmented angular crown. She’ll also be wearing the Alicorn amulet since in the story, she’s the one who created it.

3. Backstory.
The legend of Hearths Warming Eve and the migration of the 3 pony tribes is only the ending of a longer story, told from one side. Equestria was already an empire that had existed before the Celestial sisters. Silhouette Dusk was born the earth pony daughter of the Empress & Emperor. Leadership status was earned via nominations though popular vote and the approval of the rulers via heroic deeds and dedicated service.
Dusk worked to build herself a legacy to make her parents and homeland proud. Through a scholarly passion for math and science, she industrialized the empire with many new inventions and contributions, even overcoming earth pony limitations by building herself augmented armor with mechanical wings and a magnetic horn. Her dedication earned her nomination from both the citizens and her parents. But one unicorn who was enraged that both citizen and royal declined him was Sombra, who attempted to use dark magic to usurp control while the leaders were away. Dusk took it upon herself to defend her parents legacy, pitting industrial weapons against dark magic. But all the offense did was slow Sombra’s advance. It came to a point where Sombra had made his way to the throne room, and a beaten and bloodied Dusk literally stood between Sobra and her parents thrones. Only through cunning and desperation did she win, using Sombras own magic to trigger a trap using crystals.
For her scientific contributions, selfless sacrifice and bravery, the public overwhelmingly voted for her ascension, a move supported by her proud parents. This meant that she also received the highest honor: alicornhood. The first years of Dusk’s reign were filled with adoration from subjects and swift victories over adversaries. But she encountered unforeseen problems, such as the complete disappearance of the Crystal Empire, destabilizing the north causing the infighting that generated the endless winter.
Refugees from the migration were accepted into Equestria’s care, but as time went on, the northern ponies wanted a home and rule of their own. Problem was that they wanted it within Equestria. Dusk said that her subjects came first and that they could go elsewhere, but outside lay Discord, his rule stopping at the border due to him agreeing to a truce. With nowhere to go outside and tensions running high inside, the tribes were ready to take a kingdom for themselves. And they would get help in the form of two alicorn sisters, who saw the plight of the northerners and proclaimed Dusk a tyrant. The sisters led the tribes in an assault on the royal castle. While the rebels were easily pushed back by the soldiers, the princesses decimated them. With her army laid waste, Dusk was the last to oppose the sisters, striking at them with all her magic clashing against theirs. In an explosion of light, Dusk was sent plummeting. Her last moments of consciousness was hearing her conquerors saying Equestria will get the rule it deserves, as she was entombed in ice where the crystal empire used to be.
1000 years later, the empire returned, the energy from the crystal heart awakening Dusk, setting her free. Now she meets an Equestria that knows nothing of it’s lineage, her legacy stolen by Celestia & Luna. But not everypony has forgotten. Generations have waited for her return, preparing an army and running an empire in secret, waiting for her to give the first orders.

4. Personality. Again, be descriptive without dragging on.
Silhouette was a pony fascinated by all things math and science, her curiosity, passion and scholarly attitude focused though the mind of an engineer, propelled her to becoming one of the Equestrian Empires greatest inventors and scientific minds. Every moment of every day was spent going out, researching, studying, building, taking notes or getting involved in massive projects. Even during her reign as empress, she always found time.
She held her subjects in the highest regard, taking a vow to defend them, knowing that an Empress is nothing without her subjects. This appreciation for Equestria’s citizens came from watching her parents rule, how they would always go out and talk with the ponies, listen to their problems and make them feel like they mattered. While she isn’t nearly as social, what she does do is for their happiness and safety, their reverence and gratitude a sign that she truly is living up to her parents legacy. No position means more to her than that of Empress. She’ll defend that honor and respect that privilage to the end, working as hard as she can to live up to the standards of leaders past.
Her policies and attitude were more aggressive than those of the modern processes, responding to threats more often than not with a show of force, even getting involved herself when things were getting out of hoof for her advanced military. When confronted with a problem, she would stubbornly work on until it was done, even if it was against all odds or was a detriment to her own survival. It was this combined with her defiant attitude and overabundance of courage that allowed her to take a beating from Sombra or oppose 2 alicorns with an army of angry rebels.
Since her release, she’s more solemn, faking a smile for her subjects in the underground while delivering a rallying speech, but secretly and desperately racking her brain for solutions, working until she collapses just to find a way to retake her rule form Celestia and restore her empire. It has almost become an obsession with her, planning a way to beat Celestia, to one day challenge her to a duel for the crown she never lost. Seeing how Celestia has hidden away all history prior to her reign, all that she, her parents, and her predecessors have done for Equestria being silenced, is painful for her to see every day. Retribution for Celestias actions, justice for her subjects and their ancestors is her single minded determination for being right now. But while she’s see’s Celestia as the enemy, she’s having a hard time seeing the rest of Equestria the same way. The ponies are happy, and they love their princesses, which puts Dusk in a quandary she often tries not to think about. Does she avenge an old Equestria, at the cost of the present one?

5. Special abilities, especially what they do for a living from their cutie mark.
Her mark consists of red tribal outlines of a Fibonacci spiral, surrounded by sun rays, setting behind a landscape bathed in light and shadow. Represents her interest in math that started her towards the path to ruling the world. Since becoming alicorn, she has become extremely versatile at magic, capable of casting any spell. If we’ve seen it in the show, she can duplicate it.

6. Relations with canon characters.
She sees Celestia as her nemesis, little more than a thief impersonating a true alicorn, a grave insult to what Dusk believes in regarding the leadership role of Equestria. She felt the same about Luna initially, but sees her now as pathetic after hearing about how Luna “rebelled” and was imprisoned. With the Crystal Empire returned, she attempts to make a connection with the only nation that remembers her, and by extension, Shining Armor and Cadence, their leadership reminding her a little of her own parents. She’s trying to keep them neutral in the coming conflict, perhaps even sway them to her cause. She is taking quite an interest in the newest Alicorn, Twilight Sparkle, for she reminds Dusk of herself when she used to be young. Her adoration of Celestia much like her own towards her parents, relating to her passion for science and having a respect for the intellect she possesses. She tries hard to hide it, but she is starting to fancy the young alicorn. Alot.

7. Relations with other OC's, if there are any.

Dusk had few close friends, but her closest of all was the one that made her truly feel like an empress, long before she ever was one. Her name was Proxy, and she was a changeling, the daughter of Chrysalis, who departed after her mother’s lust for love left her neglected and the hive reduced to a feral mess. No pony had very been so curious or so welcoming to Proxy. Dusk told Proxy that no matter who or what you are, theres always a place in Equestria for you, and that if there wasn’t one, she’ll find one. She got something else from Dusk too. Love, of the unconditional kind. Such friendliness and compassion inspired Proxy to adopt Equestria as her true home, paying off a debt of gratitude to the country that took her in, by serving in it’s military, eventually rising to the rank of general and personal advisor to the Empress. She was there when the Sisters attacked.
Before Dusk went into combat w/ Celestia & Luna, she met with Proxy. She asked Proxy to repeat the royal vows, and upon doing so, awarded Proxy her crown, and the title of Empress, telling her that the empire needed to persevere, regardless of what Celestia and Luna might do to her. She then proceeded to teleport Proxy far away, despite her tearful objections. For the past 1000 years, Proxy has been taking on countless identities, acting as resistance leader, taking up crucial roles in Celestias regime, writing history along the way while spreading the old kind to those willing to listen. She’s setting the stage for revolution, and tirelessly searching for the first friend she ever made, the pony she thought of as far more than a friend...

8. Social life. What do they do when they're not doing special things? How do they kill time? What do they often do with their friends?

She meticulously plans Celestia’s downfall, and when she’s not doing that, she tries to figure out a peaceful way of integrating the old empire with the new Equestria. She kills time by checking on all the aspects of her underground army and networks of spies, motivating her followers to continue the fight. But every now and again, signs of the old Dusk appear, her scientific ADHD getting the better of her, causing her to research some random occurrence in nature, much to the relief of her subordinates. She’ll have long spirited conversations with Proxy, which usually amount to getting wasted on apple cider & ginger ale respectively, listening to Drop Buck Murphys and Thin Dizzy records with Dusk saying how fascinated she is with changeling physiology and Proxy making a move on Dusk by transforming into her not-so-secret crush Twilight Sparkle.

9. How they will be placed in their story.
She and Proxy will be main characters.

10. Any extra notes you want us to know.

I designed her over time to be both Celestias equal and opposite, to make the conflict not good vs. evil, but have both sides be right for their own reasons. In a way, I wanted her to be the antagonist Night Mare Moon wasn’t. NMM was just your typical ego maniac w/ jealousy issues, but the way she was designed was making me think she would stand as the opposite to Celestias character, to be her arch enemy as it were, the yang to her yin. And that’s what I’m going for towards Dusk, the dark to Celestia’s light, the one character that truly challenges the sun goddess. Not some draconequus, centaur or changeling, but another royal pony to be her rival. Yet the reason the two are so adversarial towards one another isn’t what makes them different, but what makes them alike. Neither has ever had to deal with a foe that functions like they do, and that’s what scares them both.

841752 This Blog Will Tell You What You Need To Know

3370224 You do realize that Goldy isn't a user anymore?

3370235 no I did not.

3370253 He left the site 6 months ago.

3370280 Thanks for letting me know.
Any who, would you like to take a look? It's the one for the OC story.

Name
Locke "Black Hole" Smith

Gender
Female
Race
Earth Pony
Age
24
Backstory
Despite her appearance, she is one of two earth ponies in a long line of thestral blacksmiths. She used to live in a hidden thestral town of Hollow Shades until she was expelled for eating the town's lychee supply, banned from Manehatten for devastating their orange supply five months later. She's also in trouble in Canterlot for tossing tomatoes at Prince Blueblood and pilfering tomatoes from a tomato cart.
Personality
Her blank face seems to portray her as anti-social and dim-witted... and thinks with her stomach more often than her brains. Beneath all that, she's really a kind and a somewhat compassionate pony willing to give up her food to somepony less fortunate than herself. And she likes to fight as long as her opponent has some sort of combat ability.
Special Abilities
Locke's eyes enable her to see in the dark normally, and she can walk on clouds due to her thestral heritage. She is also proficient with using cleavers as weapons, but prefers to hone her culinary experience as a chef. Unfortunately, her large appetite enables her to eat two restaurants's worth of food.
Relations with Canon Characters
Has heard of "Princess" Twilight
Relations with other OCs
Has heard of a mute human that claims to be a mythical fox and wants to fight him.
Social Life
Non-existent, but seems to spend a large deal of her time running from the Royal Lunar Guard.
How will they be placed
Most likely to be a minor antagonist
Extra Notes
She is photophobic, so she wears shades for that reason and as a result is virtually blind during the day. The bracers on her front hooves serve as weights and limiters. Also known given the moniker of "Black Hole" due to her bottomless stomach.

Feel free to be harsh as you like.

I figure most people will probably flip out at my OC due to the fact of what he is, but try to bare with me (I know what I was doing making this charater.).

1. Name: Jeremy Darkworth

2. Appearance: Since I want to save myself the embarassment of using that program, I'll just do my best to describe him to you myself. Jeremy takes on the appearance of a fourteen-year-old unicorn. He has a dark brown mane and tail, a dark orange coat, and hazel brown eyes. His appearance overall is unkempt. (What he originally looked like is kept unknown.)

3. Back Story: (This will be difficult to understand due to the complex nature of story he stars in, so again, bare with me.) Jeremy, as you probably all judged by his "unpony-like name", used to be a human, but a part of an alternate version of earth where magic and other such things existed. He lived 8 years of his life with his family, which consisted of his mother, father, and big brother, before one night when Celestia from an evil and corrupt version of Equestria (one that his father created) murders his entire family and kidnaps Jeremy for the gift he possesses. Jeremy then lived the next two years of his life under the enslavement of Celestia, his humanity and his ability to speak taken away from him as Celestia tried to keep him a secret. However, one day, with the help of a few "allies", Jeremy manages to escapes the grasp of the evil Celestia and stays on the run for four years (which point his story begins).

4. Personality: After spending six years of his life baring witness the horrors of this corrupt Equestria, Jeremy had lost any sort of childhood innocence that he had before he was kidnapped, and as a result, became very reluctant to trust anyone. Thanks his anti social personality, Jeremy was without any sort of real life role model besides for a fictional character in his beloved story book (The Book of Wolf). Although the book taught him important lessons of life, he always had trouble with applying them in a world that taught him otherwise, resulting in his mixed interpretations of valuable lessons. Overall, he takes up the role of a lost and confused child in a world full of cruelty. (PS: Jeremy is also very emotionally unstable, but not in the way you may think. Hint: , this is the only hint you will get.)

5. Special Abilities: Jeremy does not have many special abilities and has yet to earn a cuti-mark, any special abilities he does have I won't mention at all (to avoid spoilers to the story and such). However, the one ability I will talk about is one of the main topics of the story, known and referred to as "the gift". I am going to be vague about this (again, to avoid spoilers and such.), but you should get the idea. "The Gift" refers to an ability to create, manipulate, and destroy entire worlds by the use of imagination. "The Gift" was extremely rare and extremely dangerous, for if the world created was to suddenly become self aware of how it came into existence, it could bare severe consequences.

6. Cannon Relationships: His relationships with cannon characters is still in the works in the story itself and I am going to avoid mentioning it for the sake of keeping spoilers to a minimum, hope you guys understand.

7. OC Relationships: Again, keeping spoilers to a minimum.

8. Social Life: As I mentioned in his personality, he doesn't have a social life. He tries his best to avoid talking to anypony and spends his time either trying his best to survive, keep his emotions under control, or escaping reality by reading his beloved book.

9. Placement: He is the main protagonist in the story.

10. Extra Notes: He hates spiders!

I have an OC to be judged.

Name: Dusk Chaser

Species: Bat Pony

Gender: Male

Description: Dark Grey Fur, Dark Blue mane and tail, Hazel eyes, a solid build for a body that of an earth pony.

Background: Duck Chaser was a human turned bat pony when he was in a coma as a human from the result of a car crash caused by a drunk friend of his. While in the coma he developed a powerful nightmare caused by memories of his past which was strong enough to reach Luna worlds away. She soon located him and she dispelled the nightmare. She looked at his memories and saw a lot of his memories reminded her of her own past and believes he earns a second chance. She returns to Equestria to ask foe Celestia's help and he was reborn as a bat pony with no memory of being a human as Luna became his adoptive mother to give him a second chance at a happy life. He gained his cutie mark after star gazing with another bat pony and pointing out constellations.

Personality: A bit shy when you first meet him. But over time he's charismatic and enjoys having fun though in small groups of friends. Can be a bit ill tempered at times. Though he is nice and is very patient. Though he is serious when it comes to his work and can get easily annoyed when distracted.

Cutie mark: A full moon with stars on it and clouds. His special talent is Astrology.

Relation to canon characters: Adopted son of Princess Luna, Nephew to Celestia and friends with the element bearers (though he calls them his aunts).

I did not know this thread existed, is it still active?

3496144 Pros:
isn't black and red(although dark blue and dark grey aren't much better)
isn't an alicorn
doesn't have a very edgy personality
cons:
dark blue and dark grey
has the build of an earth pony despite being a bat pony
named Dusk Chaser(I've seen four OCs with that name)
is a bat pony(while this is fine if it's done right, people tend to write them as edgy vampires who get to fuck the mane six for no reason)
adopted by Luna(she's a princess, she has more important things to do than take care of a foal)
former human
kidnapped by Luna
is friends with the mane six for no reason

3498441 It is now.

Name: Bitter Leaf
Pic:
Race: Born Pegasus, reconstructed as a basic bipedal

Back story: Living in a futuristic Utopia ruled by Her Majesity Twilight Sparkle, Bitter Leaf grew up under the care of her mother. Her father had not been thrilled to have children and had signed away any rights shortly after her birth, not that it affected her much. After turning eighteen she reconstructed her body to serve in the military police, serving three tours of duty over the course of sixteen years before receiving an Honorable Discharge. Bumming around for fifty odd years she decided to join the local police force on an established world in the empire, working through the ranks at a slow but steady rate. Not a rising star she nether the less earned the attention of the security AI Vigilance for her good conduct and keen eye for detail, resulting in her being moved into the investigative branch where her prior experience as an MP let her flourish. Having earned the promotion to Detective Chief Inspector in a utopia some would think she has a cushy job, but a perfect utopia doesn't exist and even though minor crimes are quickly dealt with there are still dark depths in the hearts of ponies. Being in a utopia means that the scant few who go into those depths are the ones who go deepest.

Personality: Though a honest woman and in possession of a trustworthy nature, Bitter Leaf has few friends. Her regular dealings with the worst of the worst leaving her with a very insular social group, unlike normal citizens she what few friends she makes are true companions. A detective at heart she has a knack for spotting things others would miss and the intelligence to puzzle out all but the most schemey of schemes, as befitting a DCI she has a natural leadership that demands the best from her subordinates while emphasizing the greater good behind her decisions. However she has a short fuse for those she sees as incompetent and on a bad day will chew out any unfortunate sap who looks at her funny.

Special abilities: Even though she traded out her Pegasus body she kept the majority of the genetics, as a result she still has many of the abilities a Pegasus would at a dramatically reduced effectiveness. Lacking wings she is still able to maneuver in the air with unnatural grace, like a leaf caught in the wind she at times can seemingly turn around quickly to regain her footing when being knocked off her feet or orientate herself mid air when it should be impossible. If she concentrates she can slow her rate of fall, landing with enough force to knock the wind out of her when she should be falling at terminal velocity. She still retains the ability that makes water vapor turn solid at her touch and can compress a cloud to form electricity or condense it into water. Aside from her natural abilities she also has highly advanced hardware installed with in her body that allows her to accelerate her reaction times and manually override wireless electronics at a distance.

Relations with other OC's: As a cop she is respectful but vigilant when around the public and military. Around other cops she is either keen to foster a sense of responsibility and trustworthiness with her subordinates, leading by example. When talking to her boss, the AI Vigilance, she is casual when she can get away with it but always respectful and professional.

Relations with cannon characters: Aside from Twilight, Luna and Celestia no other cannon characters exist, after 2500 years any descendants having little to nothing in common with their ancestors (Apple Family aside). Bitter Leaf is subject in the empire Twilight built and as such sort of worships her, she is her immortal queen and even though she knows the Twilight isn't infallible she has nothing but respect and admiration for her Queen. She hasn't ever meet Luna or Celestia and only knows what her school books told her about them, so no strong feelings.

Social life: When she isn't busy working, and her work is very nearly her life, she is at home relaxing with a drink and smoke. On occasion she visits bars that have live bands playing, on occasion she might take a lucky person home but only ever for one night. Her work is simply too much of her life to warrant any kind of prolonged personal commitment. A Pegasus at heart she enjoys the feeling of wind in her hair and one of her few hobbies is racing fast machines. Her other hobby is full immersion simulation battles, war games nearly indistinguishable from the real thing, a hold over from her days in the military that she uses to keep her skills sharp.

Place in story: A main character

3498554 Just thinking, one the other guy's cons was that his OC was a human turned pony...mine is a pony turned human (except not 'human' cause no earth in that setting) so is that a sin?

3498686 No, but the concept of your story has major problems, like Cadance not existing, and the entire world seeming like it just had ponies thrown in because why not.

3498715 Its a complex world, it would take way too much time to explain it all. But it's not that it had ponies thrown in but the ponies themselves progressed as a civilization to the point where the no longer identify as individual species but as a culture. When you can change a your gender race and species like changing pants you kinda stop identifying as any one species. It'd be like us identifying ourselves as the clothes we wear,instead of the person beneath them.

3498727 My point is that you could replace the ponies with almost anything and people wouldn't be able to tell that it was originally a MLP fanfic.

3498742 Ah, well yeah I guess it is. I've always loved space operas and I like FiM, so I tried come up with setting for it. I changed a couple of things, had Twilight as the leader because why not and over the course of a year and a half looked at the world I built and went 'huh, I could totally write this up, change all the pony to something else and bam, space opera'. And yeah, I know it's jarring to some who's expecting a pony heavy fic, after all this if Fimfiction. But I do honestly believe the world is a good one and a logical result of introducing that level of technology over time into a society.

And if in trying to make pony SciFi setting I accidentally built an original one, I consider that an achievement.

3498554

I actually have a story I'm working on that goes in depth about it. But he wasn't kidnapped. He was offered a chance at a new life.

Okay I have a few OCs I need looked at but before I put the ocs I'm actually using in a story (because I'm a bad author and am still developing them ) I'd like for my first oc (who I want to make a story out of but am avoiding because I know how bad non-support ocs can be).

Name: Violet Frost (yes I know its the same as my username. She's not a full self insert but she does do things that I would have liked to do but has grown beyond that scope of her character)

Description: My avatar though I would like to point out despite being a young pony (roughly the mane 6's age) she is grey on a purple base. I'm pulling from actual equine genetics here (specifically dapple grey, which can occur with any color dapples though black(there for dark grey dapples) is the most common in real life). Her mane and tail are pretty much always braided because otherwise they get in the way and she doesn't want to spend the time always cutting it short.

Gender: She's a mare

Race: Earth pony

Backstory: Violet Frost grew up in a farming community in which corn and other grains were the primary crops. The rolling hills of the area have turned out citizens (mostly earth ponys but some unicorns and pegisi live here as well) that do not trot, instead having an in between gait that is more functional on the hills (a running walk https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xlEz6CKYpTQ not sure how I would describe this in story). Violet Frost though did not pick up a farming talent, and the one she developed caused her to eventually settle down in ponyville because there was actually a decent amount of work. Unfortunatly her work deals with magical creatures and the specific line of work she is barred from getting a proper lisence due to the work being 'to dangerous' for earth ponies.

Personality: Introverted for the most part, though willing to do extra work as long as she's paid. She finds it hard to relax most of the time because she knows that by following her dreams she's breaking the law, so she also is constantly scaning for escape routes.

Special Abilities: She is good with creatures, especially carnivores and those who are very magically inclined. Because she was denied acceptance to any accademey for magical creature catchers (including the one based in Celestia's School for Gifted Unicorns) she has traveled around and perfected her work through trial and error and sometimes finding teachers in the most unlikely places.

Relationships with cannon characters: none at the start of the story, but if I were to write one she and Fluttershy would come into conflict because of some of the things that Violet Frost does to catch, rehabilitate (sometimes) and releasing the magical creatures. Even the best sneaky ponies can't avoid the law of their neighbors (not next door just in general) forever. She also knows Zecora from her time spent traveling, but did not settle in Ponyville because Zecora was there.

Relationships with other OCs: She knows a tribe of zebras, becoming known as the 'spotted hunter' or whatever name they would give to individuals who delt with wild animals. Essentially by learning from them she is bascily an honorary member of that specific tribe.

Social Life: Limited to the time she spends with her clients and buying groceries and tools. She likes to keep to herself thinking that letting other ponies in would jeapordize her lively hood doing what she loves.

Placed: She'd either be the main character, or a support character role for Fluttershy (under the assumption that supporting characters may also help other characters to grow)

Other Notes: She's not afraid of most magical creatures and acutally keeps a timber wolf as a pet/compainion/partner. Part of her time is spent teaching him commands to help her track down and catch creatures, though he scares ponies so she really takes care to make sure he isn't seen.

Alright, that's my OC. Since I haven't finished the series about him, some details might change later on. This is his description after the end of my story "Links to the Past". this description is full of spoilers, so you might want to read the stories first, if you're going to read them.

1. Hase (was supposed to be Haze initally, but I think it works out this way as well)

2. Black coat, zenith blue mane and tail, Coco Crusoe manestyle.His cutie mark is a toothwheel with two small clouds on its two sides.

2.1. Stallion

2.2. Pegasus

3. Used to be Celesia's royal inventor. Lived in a house in Canterlot with his mother. Invented an Invicibility Potion Celestia became addicted to, so he had to heal her. Destroyed the formula, so that nopony would suffer from it again, but accidentally discovered another one, that makes ponies immortal. He injected himself with it and tried to persuade Celestia to alow him to make everypony immortal. As she disagreed, he broke his friendship with her and Luna and ran away, trying to achieve what he had planned on his own, and was therefore chased as a dangerous criminal for two years. Seeing the ultimate failure of his plans, he put himself in a cryochamber to awake 1000 years later and try again. That's where The Revolution of the Century picks off.

4. Caring, friendly, following his goals

5. Inventing. Also, ( MAJOR SPOILER ALERT IF YOU HAVEN'T READ Links to the Past ) the powers of a Chaotic (it will take too much to explain here, but Links to the Past explains it), although he's still a beginner and has no idea what he's doing most of the times.

6. Friends with Celestia and Luna, later enemies. ( Spoilers again, sorry) after the end of The Revolution of the Century renewed his friendship with them, also made friends with Spike and the Mane 6. Also (I realize how this is going to sound, so get ready) Rarity's coltfriend after (spoilers again) saving her from more than a two mile vertical drop. It's a teen story, so by so far it's one or two mouth kisses and a few cheek kisses. That's all.

7. Vortex ( Spoilers, if you haven't read LTTP) - his father, also the uncle of Luna and Celestia, framed, that he'd murdered his own brother ( their father)

Thunder Flight, Gale and Rush ( again spoilers) - Equestria's flight team before the Wonderbolts, used Hase's friendship to reach their position and visited him rarely after they did so. However, he forgives them.

Formidon (spoilers. Also, this won't sound too well) The giant black dragon decides not to take revenge on his former enslaver by burning Ponyville after Hase told him he'd only please him. Instead he chose to see what friendship's all about.

8. Living a normal life in Ponyville with his friends, while trying to promote his invention business nopony seems to care about.
However by so far he's mostly doing things, although he's craving for a normal life.

9. Main character

10. He'll probably get a bit more marysue- ish as the current series progresses, but I hope, that with the right developement and with the proper amount of flaws he'll manage to stay close to the golden middle.

Now for my OC

1. Callidus/Aether

2. He is a jet black earth pony with a black mane, white hooves, and a chipped left ear with a winged sword with the tip pointing down for a cutiemark. Later in my story though he discovers that he is actually an alicorn

3. Callidus suffered from amnesia ever since he was only a child, he grew up in the country of the zebras with Zecora being his adoptive sister. He and his sister had a only a moment of happiness until suddenly they were forced to adapt to the cruel world which runs rampant with demons, literally. At around 12 he and Zecora became assassins for hire to make ends meet. At 13 they moved again only to commit mass murder against the minotaur's military out of survival. At 19 he and Zecora become professional devil hunters and they stumble upon Ponyville in hopes of finding a job which later escalates with him becoming a prince.

4. To everyone else Callidus is a very cold-hearted and stoic individual who barely shows and emotion to almost everything and thought to have nerves of steel. But in reality, Callidus is a torn and broken pony with suicidal tendencies whose only purpose to live is to keep carrying all the pain he suffered throughout his years, he believes he has lost the right to kill himself so he continues to fight until he is killed by someone else.

5. For an unexplained reason (which will later be explained in my story) he has the ability to shape-shift into a human which helps him kill and fight. In both pony and human forms he is a very skilled fighter able to adapt to every battle he is in and has a very sharp mind making him a very formidable warrior. He also has very good marksmanship, he almost never misses his target.

6. In one of my chapters he, Zecora and two other devil hunters make their way to Canterlot and the mane six join them in an effort to fight. They go by train and they get attacked by demons forcing the mane six to fight for their lives.

7. My OC Violet, she claims to be his cousin.

8. In his spare time he simply moves on to the next town until he has another job.

9. Callidus is my main character in my story.

10. He has amnesia because someone was able to tamper with his brain without him dying.

And now for the results...

This is my OC right now and I know it might not help because of how little I put in this Sheet. I did so because I have a story on the website with the Character and don't want to reveal too much before the story is done. sorry in advance.

1. Weaponry

2. It’s my avatar but he's tan colored has an X scar over his right eye which is closed and his mark on his flank are two swords in an X formation with a halberd going vertically while a spear went horizontally through them

2.1. Male

2.2. Unicorn

3. He was once a commander of the royal guard at one point before something happened in the San Palomino Desert where he stepped down as a commander and started training to the point where his body would give out. He soon started having nightmares and they became so bad that he would wake up and not go back to sleep. To be honest I have a much more in depth back story but don’t want to ruin anything since he’s in my story Past Shadows.

4. Loyal to the kingdom and his comrades. Can be a bit mean at times and puts his duties first before anything else

5. Combat magic. To be more specific, he can use his magic to materialize weapons. The max he can do is six.

6. At this point in the story, he isn’t in any relationship with any of the cannon characters.

7. Again, because of the story going on now, I don’t want to reveal too much

8. His social life revolves around training to get stronger and protecting the kingdom with his life.

9. Main

10. again, because of the story going on now, I don’t want to reveal too much.

3613590
Ok, lets get this over with.
1. Haze sounds better

2.At least his mane isn't red. That's an apparent no, no. Cutie mark sounds complex.

3. I... I don't realy understand whats happening. How did he accidently invent a potion for immortality? Why wouldn't Celestia want that? Do the sisters make them self's immortal with it? And why would I go and read your story just to understand what you put on here when your asking if you OC is good and like able? (sorry for sounding so negative. its just... )

4.Thats good.
5. Inventing. good. but that's all I realy understood form that. Stick with that. I saw powers of chaotic and just kinda... then then

6. It sounds terrible to drop him in the middle of the main 6. Unless done will, I'm pretty sure that will be frowned upon.

7.1 With vortex. Wait... what? So your OC is also the nephew of the sisters. not sure if that's a good idea.
7.2 I feel I need to see that in context to fully understand it. But I frankly don't want to read your story (wow I sound like a dick....)
7.3 uuuuuhhhhh........ refer to 7.2

8. That's nice. BUUUUUTTTTTT how did he get there? is his life really normal? I don't care about his business ether, what about everything else you said is suppose to happen to him?

10. a million times Maybe his flaws can be he's addicted to something he made by accident. Or something. I think that maybe- no, no I just cant do this, I give up... I'm only trying to participate in the discussion. Don't hate me for all of this. But your OC just sounds bad. Very bad. And out of context all of this is very confusing, and I'm completely lost.... Sorry if your feelings are hurt.

Now on to my OC that I'm sure will make someone out there groan as they read this.

1. Star Gazer

2. Refer to Avatar. His cutie mark is a crescent moon with some stars around it.
2.1 Male
2.2 Alicorn (don't instantly hate him. I have a good reason that he is. just.. bare with me

3. Ok, lets try to keep this under 500 words (no promises)
Star Gazer is an alicorn by birth, being so because of a genetic disorder that has a 12% chance of resulting in an alicorn. But, due to this disorder, he has random potentially dangerous magic out-bursts, it takes him twice as much effort put forth to cast any spell, little control over his wings which cause them to do things like flap randomly, and "soft pummels" which limit his flight to short bursts. Because of those things, he is generally avoided by most ponies. His mother left when he was young because of relation ship problems with father. He is on medications to help control his magic and wings, but hates them and finds different ways to not take them. He wants to be able to control his magic on his own, wanting to go to Celestia's School for Gifted unicorns to do so.
Also, because of his connection with the stars, NIghtmare Moon wants to use him to escape the moon. Celestia, keeping tabs on any way to get her sister back, knows about this, and enrolls him in her school. He has many academic problems, so Celestia has him go out on adventures that push his limits, and gather rare/magical artifacts.

4. Determined, lonely, and a little rebelus.

5. Mostly, its related to looking at the stars. But Nightmare Moon is trying to manipulate him in to making a pathway of stars from the moon to the Equestrian world. Celestia has the same goal, but is doing so to get her sister back.

6. Celestia, Nightmare moon, and young Twilight. Celestia just sends him on quests. Nightmare Moon only cares about escaping the moon, but Star Gazer talks to her because her voice sounds like his mothers. Twilight is just a school yard crush, and pretty much ignores him.

7.1 Astral cast, Father. He's a member of the Equestrian Royal Counsel, and works to much. Doesn't have a very large role in the story.
7.2 His foal sitter, doesn't have a name yet. She is a spy for Celestia, keeping a tab on Star, and is occasnal comfort for the colt.

8. Almost none. He's avoided mostly, and is almost constantly on quests.

9. Main character

10. Has a star Nightmare Moon gave him when showing him the star manipulation spell, and uses it as a light in dark places. He also eventually goes a little crazy, only wanting to come out at night, farther distancing himself from other ponies. As for his quests, some are pointless, fails at a number of them, and sometimes somepony has already gotten the artifact, and he has to deal with that.

Thank you for sitting though all of that. Hope you provide input.

3737940 Okay, I'll bite.

1 The name is not very special-snowflake, which is good, however it has no relation to the character's skills or abilities, which is bad. From what we understand, he doesn't do much star-gazing and thus the name is somewhat redundant.

2 His appearance is also fairly good (I.E not RnBalicorn), however I would say the color scheme could stand to be a little more complimentary. His cutie mark is something I will discuss later.

3 He's an alicorn. Stop right there. He's an alicorn... even if he's got quite a few problems to balance this (an approach which I kind of approve of), he's still an alicorn. 12% is a pretty big chance to be honest, you're more likely to be an Alicorn if you contract this disorder than you are to win the lottery. This isn't the only problem I have however. He suffers from random, potentially dangerous outbursts of magic for which he is prescribed medication, yet he refuses to take said medication. To me, that's irresponsible and dangerous to both himself and the ponies around him. It's criminally negligent in fact, and failing to take said medication could result in criminal charges for the pony in question.

Talking of criminal negligence, this is a pony who may or may not be fully grown, who doesn't have full control of his wings or magic, which is something that colts or fillies are supposed to have. From what we know of Celestia, she's a wise, nurturing character that cares deeply for her subjects and the students at her school. Why then would she be sending a pony with the aforementioned difficulties out on these highly dangerous quests?

4 His personality... I can see how someone with the backstory you've developed would grow into a fairly determined and isolated pony and likewise I can see how a pony would start to kick out against authority if he was being forced to take medication and being sent out on dangerous missions.

5 So he moves the stars? That's a fairly big red flag right there. We know of two other alicorns that have power over celestial objects, and both of them have had thousands of years to learn thier craft.

6 I can see why he would know Celestia, as his primary tutor, but why and how would nightmare moon even know he existed, from what I understand, her contact with Equestria is fairly minimal. I can get him knowing Twilight though, even if she's just a schoolyard crush, we've all had those after all.

7 I can't comment on the OCs that he knows, because they're yours and I don't know enough about them to have an opinion.

8 I haven't really got anything to say here, this is consistent with what you've told us about him being a lonely pony who doesn't get out much apart from when he goes on death-defying adventures to find magical artefacts, although I wonder why he doesn't bond with the ponies that go with him on these quests... unless he goes out alone on these quests, which stretches my credulity far harder than I'd like.

9 fair enough, nothing to say here.

10 I have nothing to say here that isn't reiterating what I've already said.

In conclusion: This pony needs further development. I can see him becoming a good character, but only with quite a bit of work and adaptation. Please don't take my words personally, but I must be honest with you for development as a writer to occur.
Rating: 5/10, not sure if heretic.

3737983
He's still a work in progress, and I fell I should elaborate on somethings, and I will do so to their number.
1. I probably should have mentioned that he does star gaze when he can. But I thought it would make his back story (more) overly long.
2. I have another picture of him somewhere that his colors are better, and complement more. I just need to find it.
3.1 Only 3% of the alicorns that are born with this can use magic and their wings correctly. It also affects unicorns, and pegisi in similar ways. I have also played around with the idea of making him a hippogriff, with his claws being a pseudo horn
3.2 He's young in this, so he doesn't fully understand why he has to take it, and frankly hates what it does to his mental state. (trust me, its not a very good experience, and can mess with your brain chemistry in terrible ways. I speak from experience.)
3.3 Basically, he learns better though being put in to situations where he has to ether figure it out himself, or learn through those situations. His teachers end up being frustrated with him, and she thinks putting him through situations where he has to do those things will help him learn to control his magic better, and gain more motor control with short flight.
4. He doesn't take the medicine for reasons already explained. He doesn't lash out against authority in any other ways.
5. He can only move a few at a time. Part of the quests are to gather artifacts to make a magic tool to amplify spells. Nightmare moon cant because of [reasons to be determined later, when I come up with them], and Celestia's magic is focused on day related things.
6. Nightmare Moon senses that he has a connection to the stars (she also notices any other pony that has a cutie mark in anything night related), and communicates by projecting her voice to where his location is to talk to him. He talks back because she sounds like his mother, who he misses.
8. Sometimes alone, sometimes with others. But Always with some kind of hidden back up to help him if he gets hurt or something. (example, in one he's captured by native zebra deep in a jungle, and a small task force attempts a rescue)

So, with all of that said, what improvements need to be made?

3737893 My feelings are not hurt at all. I guess the spoiler filled dexcription didn't explain everything the way I expected it will, and reaally made him sound like a really bad OC. Since you aren't going to read the stories anyway, I may just well clear out the whole thing.

Spoiler alert, if anyone else reading this is planning to read my stories. Also, I'm warning you all, it's very long, since it's ment to sum up two stories and a lot of backstory.

Hase, son of Vortex, was born a black pegasus foal with a dark blue mane. In order to protect his son, since there were rumours of his birth, his father, uncle of Luna and Celestia, who, due to a loss of control over his Voidan* ( check it in the bottom part) army, was accused of murdering his brother and spent the last years of the first equestrian kingdom, the era of Discord and the age of the new equestrian kingdom hiding from the regal sisters, until he fell in love with ann earth pony mare.

Hase never saw his father untill the events of " Links to the past ". He had a relatively normal childhood, although he, together with his friends Gale, Rush and Thunderflight, all pegasi foals, were the only non- unicorns in their school and therefore bullied a bit.

The life of the earth pony changed, when Princess Celestia, annoyed of the constant failures of her royal scientists, who simply, as most of Equestria, didn't understand science or care about it. With hard work Hase managed to put together a crappy waitor bot, that granted him the post. Being too young, Celestia gave him full access to the science part of the Canterlot library, until he became old enough.

During all these years, the earth pony made friends with the two Princesses, however, his old friends distanced themselves from him when they began their flight lessons with the best flier in Equestria whose services the Princesses had acquired when the colt asked them to. Hase showed surprising potential and made amazing discoveries, that only he and the Princesses seemed to care about.

Still a bit immature (before her mane became ethereal), Celestia decided to try what will it be like if she could become truly invincible. She asked Hase to create such a formula, and he did. However, there was a side effect: it was addictive. According to the inventor, the second dose could start an unbreakable cycle. Celestia fell for that and spent a few months under the drug's influence, unti she was healed by her sister and Luna.

Shortly after that, two big events occured. Luna became Nightmare Moon and was banished, and Hase, while chemically destroying the formula, accidentally created two formulas, one of which made a pony an alicorn, while the other simply made one immortal. Having always had the dream of being able to do magic, Hase used the former and presented his plan to Celestia.

After banishing Luna, Celestia's mane shifted to its ethereal form, giving her an understanding of the burden of immortality. Horrified of Hase's plan, who was planning to make everypony immortals, who would share her burden, the alicorn tried to reason with him, but the earth pony though she was simply being egoistical. Not having any choice, Celestia removed Hase's horn and wings, preventing him from becoming an alicorn ever again.

Hase left the castle as her enemy and spent the following two years gathering an army of artifical alicorns to storm the castle and siege it, while he makes everypony immortal. This plan failed, resulting in more than 20 newly alicornified ponies dying. The stallion fled in a cryochamber castle, which fell somewhere in the Everfree.

About 1000 years later, Celestia and Luna receive a signal, that Hase is awake and will try his plan again - this time using an ancient evil, created by Vortex*, to stop them. They join forces with the Mane 6 and head to the forest to stop him. Their reasoning seems to have some effect on him, but before they could convince him to the end, the evil force teleports them all to a different dimension, in which the 6 parts of this evil rule from millenia. Hase starts out hostile to the Mane 6 and the Princesses, only cooperating since it's the only way he could get back to Equestria.

However, over a week, while the group keeps defeating the evil force's incarnations one after another, he bonds with them, and (I know this isn't going to sound well) develops a mutual love with Rarity. He proves he has the 6 main virtues of friendship (the same as the Elements of Harmony). At the end, the group returns to Equestria. However, there is a threat Hase warned them about they couldn't stop. A week ago, he has set a trap in case something goes wrong. Upon returning to Equestria, the stallion triggers a dispenser, that releases his formula for eternal life in the air, making the entire Ponyville immortal.

The first story ends with Hase being convinced, that at least for now, the citizen of Ponyville have nothing against being immortal.

The second story picks off two months after that. Hase is good friends with the Mane 6, he's Rarity's coltfriend and everything seems to be fine. His invention business isn't running well, but he doesn't seem to care that much.

The Mane 6 leave for Canterlot to be invigilators in an exam in Celestia's School for Gifted Unicorns, and leave Hase taking care of the Cutie Mark Crusaders.

Meanwhile, Hase's old pegasi friends awake in cryochambers in the Everfree. 1000 years ago, they have been put in them by Vortex to be used as pawns in his plan for reunion with his son. They are told they will die in a week because of a deffect in their chambers, unless they follow the alicorn's instructions. However, Hase foils this scheme by accepting his friends and treating them with the eternal life formula. The stallion spends time getting to know the CMC better and having fun with them and his old friends. Vortex, however, sends out Voidans to do the three pegasi's job. The first one is defeated by Discord, but the second one manages to ponynap the CMC and bring it to him. The alicorn treats them kindly, but requests from Hase to trade himself for them.

After this happens, the CMC and Discord unleash the evil force from the previous story, in order to help them against Vortex, who they are still doubting. Due to a psychic bond between them and Hase, since he was the one, that tried to control them, his friendship lessons were also passed to them. As a result, they are reformed and their true power is restored. the curse put upon them by Celestia and Luna's father being lifted.

It is revealed, that actually those incarnations of the powers of nature were actually created by Vortex to stop his Voidian army and the untied forces of Equestria, led by his brother, from colliding while the negotiations last. However, one Voidian slips out of Vortex's control and kills his brother. In his last moments, the other alicorn curses the six peacekeepers, believing it was their fault.

Actually, Vortex has called Hase to lift his disguise spell and bring back Hase's real pegasus form, to tell him the story of his life and to reveal, that he's his father. He aslo tells him, that just like himself, Hase is a chaotic* and must be trained.

Meanwhile, the Mane 6 and the Princesses, having received the letter of the CMC, are also joining the party. They meet with Hase's old friends and the CMC midway to the castle.

Before that, upon seeing the release of the six peacekeepers, and believing they are still evil, Hase decides to back up his dad, who's going to fight them. He tries to summon a Voidian, but being an absolute beginner, unleashes a giant dragon, who wants to destroy Ponyville and pulls the pegasus along.

All the others meet and join forces, as they see what Hase has done. They run back to Ponyville, since Vortex is aware of the dragon's desire, so that they could stop him. However, Hase uses the lessons of friendship he was taught to turn the dragon from a foe into a friend and make him reconcider his desire. A few moments after everypony gathers and everything's back into control, a mysterious portal opens and sucks in everypony except the CMC, Discord and Hase's old pegasi friends. That's where the story I'm currently writing is about to pick off.

* Voidians is what any living being becomes after they leave their world and fall in the Void between the worlds. Their energy and colour is drained and a small piece of chaotic energy ( energy of the Void) is left in them, turning any energy they acquire into more chaotic energy. The Void is endless and consists of layers, filled with a desolate version of any landscape one can imagine.

Voidians feel constant hunger and will do anything to get inside a world and consume its energy. This opens holes in the world, from which more Voidians enter, and if they aren't stopped, soon the world gets destroyed.

* Vortex created six sentinels, each donning the form of a very tall pegasus and consisting of the natural element he wields: fire, sea, river, rock or air.

* A chaotic is what any living being becomes, after touching " an artifact ": an inanimate object, that has been into the Void and that was returned to another or the same dimension. The being becomes able to use the chaotic energy of the Void as a version of any magic there was or is ( but it is limited by the individual's nowledge of such) and also control Voidians, because of the energy inside of them. However, progress is at much slower rate than with any other type of magic, and the beginner can only use telekinesis or open unprotected portals to the Void (which should be avoided because of the second paragraph in the first *)

I'm sorry for this long comment, but I couldn't sum it up any better. I am kind of aware, that my OC is dangerously close to ( if not one) a Mary Sue, but since no- one reads my stories anyway, and I find them acceptable, I'm simply writing for my own pleasure, unlike in the beggining. Although I only have 2 stories on the site, " Links of the Past " is actually my 7th finished story and my 9th story at all.
My first story was a classical Mary Sue tale, which immeadietly got 49 dilikes ( I think that's the most attention I've ever had on the site), almost made me quit. But after a few wekks, after I got more acquainted with fanfiction and I understood why people disliked my story ( before that I knew nothing, like Jon Snow and most of the beginner writers), I began a new story. I began writing the Revolution of the Century. Not the version on the site, that's present today though.

At that time, I was obsessed with Marvel, after seeing the Avengers. Also, I still wasn't fully acquainted with the Mary Sues, and thought, that if I weren't so direct, things would be better. If I have to be honest, I would immeadietly dislike my story if I could go back in time. Back than, all I wanted to do was to have all of the Avengers in a single alicorn OC.

God knows why, the trick went. Not demonstrating his powers in any way, my alicorn OC seemed to go unnoticed, even though my ponified Avengers were tragic. So, i wrote a second. A third. Even a fourth. All of them were weird mixtures of bad writing and copying from Marvel movies (even though I still think Marvel is the best, I have to admit i was obsessed back than).

But as I wrote my fifth story, not related to Marvel in any way, I realised I liked it more than the others. Than I took a hard decision. I erased all what I have written and began from scratch for the second time. Months of work were gone, but it was for good. Having written 5 stories, my writing had improved significantly. I let Marvel be Marvel and my stories were no crossovers anymore.

I went back and rewrote my stories, making them hundred times better. I'm currently rewriting the third one, and as I write it, I think how for the time I got to the fourth chapter, I would have already finished its older version. I add details, change the story world, add characters, take something old and turn it into something new. Along the way, Hase becomes less and less Mary Sueish. Still, what I have planned him to be like for the fourth story will probably make him look like a Mary Sue.

Before I had no idea how to outweigh that. Now I know. Emotions, decision making, reactions - those, if used well, can turn even an alicorn OC into a good OC. Because when the story doesn't focus on power, but on the character him- or herself, everybody's equal.

I hope this is the right way to make a character, that probably has too much powers, look realistic. I probably won't change Hase to Haze. It would mean going over my stories again. But that's not importrant. When I see my character's name, it reminds me of what he used to be and how he's changed. Like comparing an old 90s videogame's graphics to the one of its sequel from the 2010s. It shows me how much I've progressed.

Knowing what Hase was like before, and what a bad character he was, I'll probably never be able to look at his current state as objectively as you do. I won't rewrite my stories again. I have ideas, story concepts in my head, ready to be written. If I haven't chosen to rewrite my stories before, probably I would be writing the 8th or 9th story of the series already. I can't start all over again, when I have ideas for over 20 stories in my head.

Before I craved, that people would read my stories. Each time I opened the site I was hoping I would see one of my headlines in the Featured section. Now I don't have such illusions. I'm satisfied with my work. I would feel content, if someone else liked my stories as well, but I'm not dissappointed from the fact, that nobody seems to read them after I submit them. After all, probably about 78% of the users in this site never get their story featured. Now I write for the pleasure of writing. I have a dream, that some day I will be able to see all the concepts in my mind on this site. That will probably never happen. It would require years, and you never know what will happen next in life.

So, to recap, I didn't join this group because I am a new writer. Oh no. I joined this group to check wheter my story is better than before. The big time period between my answer and the reply gave me a time to think. When it was answered, I already new my OC, described the silly way I described it in my comment, would make anyone call it a Mary Sue. Nevertheless, I don't think he is a Mary Sue now. In my story universe, right now he is a confused pegasus with weird powers, who doesn't know how to fly and can't really use those powers. Yes, in my fourth story he would have more powers and take on many traits of a Mary Sue. However, I hope, that his emotions and the problems he faces, for the sollution of which his powers wouldn't matter, would at least make him acceptable.

3738598
If you are writing for fun, not fame, that is wonderful for you. I mean it, its much more fun to write when you don't care what other people thing about your work.
I cant say if its better than you previous works or not, but it sounds like it starts out good, and sane if you will, but eventually it just kind of gets a little bit tangled in a web of plot twists, and other stuff.
And I see what you mean about the whole shorting the back story thing. Just look at my OC description. If I went on about the story itself, it would be much longer, or even if I went on to explain all about the genetic disorder I came up with.
Also, there is a correct way of making a character. But, my knowledge of that doesn't matter in fan fiction because there seams to be a different set of rules based on what the fandom will accept and what they (brutally) reject. Like, my first attempt on the story with my OC, it was instantly hated. But I've gone back, changed things, and now I'm re-writing it. I personally want it to be like day-dreams we all must have had of going on adventures instead of class work to learn the same stuff. All the while being a reflection of myself with how my life has been a weird whirl of being bullied, ignored by crushes, being used by others for their own goals, and how that has affected me emotionally, and even physically. Just to have a sequel about adjusting to what everypony else calls normal, such as what I'm trying to do now with the real world. But I'm getting off topic.
In the end, your premise sounds good at first, gets a little strange, then a little stranger. Then its like discord got ahold of it. But, like I said, if you are writing for fun, that's great. And beauty is in the eye of the beholder, and everyone has their own options. To you, its amassing, to anther its not. But what the other thinks shouldn't mater to you.

3738662 Sorry about the excessively long comment! Good luck with your stories. I saw your character description, and I think your story really has a great potential. Just never give up.

EDIT: I couldn't find your story. Did you delete it or something? Is it on another site? I was so going to read it...

EDIT 2: Just out of pure curiosity, can you tell me where the story gets strange, stranger and then Discord level strange?

3740389
I took it off because of a bunch of negativity about it. Currently I'm rewriting it, so its just in my computer for now. I'll let you know when it's done if you want.
It starts getting strange when he goes in to cryo. But that ones ok. When its starts getting in to the vortex returning, it kind of devolves in to chaos from there. It may make more since in the story, but in summary it gets a little... tangled from that point.

3740539 Thanks for your reply. I guess it really sounds weird when I sum up a chapter in a single paragraph

Also, let me know when your story is on the site. Its summary sure got me interested.

3744949
It may be 2 to 3 weeks. Currently working on the next chapters of the Celestia story I have. Chapter 2 of it I will post when it (finally) gets edited, and chapter 3 is halfway written.

1. Name: Wingsteam

2. Appearance

3. Background Story
Wingstream is a stallion born in the city of Cloudsdale and later raised at Unicorn Range, away from the crowded city-life. He lost his father not long after due to a severe storm.
Fueled by tragedy, he learned to fly at young age, way before his peers. He passed Flight School with flying colors and joined the Equestrian Guard shortly after he turned 18. He then slowly worked his way to become a soldier with the special forces, bonded to Honor, Loyalty and Courage, and trained to be an expert survivalist and an expert on long distance marksmanship.

4. Personality
Cocky, Stubborn and Friendly. A pegasus born to fly since he was a foal. He likes to push himself to the limits. Hi-speeds and high altitudes is his best comfort zone beside swimming the Ocean.

5. Special Abilities
Unlike other stallions, he is trained to withstand the brutal cold of the Crystal Mountains and the cooking heat of the Saddle Arabian Desert. His flying abilities goes beyond Wonderbolt material, as breaking the Sound Barrier and swift reflexes is his acme.

6. Relations with Canon Characters
Before he moved, he had a close relation with Rainbow Dash in his early years at Flight School, he had a major crush on Rainbow Dash. He only wasn't brave enough to tell her.

7. Relations with other OC's
Eenope...

8. Social Life
Wingstream has a quiet life when it comes to his place of residence, because he has a cloud house against Foal Mountain. But other how than that he has a healthy social life. He likes to hang out with his friends but flying a romantic flight with some pony special is something he won't refuse.

9. Story Placement
- Main
- Supporting

10. Extra Notes: Cutie Mark Symbolism

Cutie Mark Symbolism
The Trident: The Trident symbolizes a connection to the sea. The hardest element which a pony can encounter and preform in. - Wingstream can find himself most comfortable in the water. Hes definitely not scared of a swim.

The Wings: The wings symbolizes the ability of flying. The one ability only Pegasi and Alicorns can inherit. - It's an ability which Wingstream completely predominates. In matter of fact, when something troubles him, he takes flights way above cloud level to focus and relax.

Vapor Cone & Up-drafting pile of dust (or Cloud): up-draft symbolizes hi-speeds. Only while flying at high speed. The vapor cone symbolizes high velocity which brings immense physical stress on the body. - Wingstream is completely evolved in flying, which brings the ability of flying incredibly fast and maneuverable. His body is physically up against the high toll it brings with it.

Everything combined symbolizes dominance in the two elite environmental elements in which Wingstream is completely evolved. The reason why Wingstream has a trident instead of an anchor is because it symbolizes his father's role in the military.

Digging back to the present. Wingstream was an in-confident and shy stallion at first, but due to his abilities and skills in flying, he became more adventurous, confident and cocky when he grew older. His family and his brothers-in-arms stands above all. His usual mood is cocky but he is a very friendly stallion when it comes to friends and family.

1. (BH-619) Alexander ‘Colt’ Wilds
2. height 6’1”. weighs in at 185 lbs, muscular but over built, well toned. wears blue denim jeans, a forest green lightweight long sleeve shirt, hiking boots.
2.2. Bio-human, a genetically altered human, made through science.
3. was created in a top secret weapons research facility, as a living weapon. trained in hand to hand combat, weapons, field tactics. treated like a freak of nature most of his life.
4. He is quiet shy and timid, easily frightened in large crowds, often results with some pony hurt . Will defend those he cares about to the death. He is loyal, brave, strong, humble,
5. Hand to hand,dual sword and survival expert. fighting sense- can pick up the slightest detail in muscle movement and accurately predict his opponent's next move and react.
6. Fluttershy, Applejack, Twilight- lovers
Pinkie Pie,Rarity, Princess Celestia, Spike, Shining Armor, and Cadance - Close Friends
Rainbow- Rival, possible lover in future yet to decide
Princess Luna, some what of a motherly figure
Blue Blood-bitter enemies
7. Doctor Monstrum co-creator, pro/anti
8. Prefers, small friendly get to gathers, among close friends and family. Relax and just hang out after a hard days work. Maybe go star gazing, a picnic in the park.
9. Escaped through the Dimensional Doorway Generator (DDG)
10. Favors-twin fang blades, Two 3’ foot reaper swords, made of lunar steel, and black leather-like grip.

3618683

These are my comments about your OC. These are my opinions so take them for what they are worth. I will be going by the information you posted on your character as written so forgive me if I opinions may be off.

1. The names are all right.

2. Pulling off the black pony in a world of multicolored ponies can be difficult. Your character has to be quite exceptional to the rule in order for readers to over look this.

Yeah, I'll be saving the Alicorn discovery for later.

3. The amnesia bit for most stories is well over done. It suggest to the reader that the author was too lazy to make up a background for the character. Worse, there is something about this character you know is going to irk the reader and you do not wish for it to come out because the strikes it would recieve against the story.

I'm guessing his history with Zecora is going to earn the 'Alternate' tag because this Zecora is waaaaaaay different from the Zecora I know from the television show.

Assassion, meh; devil hunter, intersting; Prince, we'll talk about that later.

4. Personality needs work. Actually it needs you to pick one of side personalities and work with that confines to make this character worth investing my time in. Both are overdone to the point of being burnt. What are you planning to do with these traits thats going to make him different from the rest. Right now, he's rather uninteresting and trite.

5. He's good at killing, but nothing else. Yeah, for a devil hunter he's the guy you use for hired muscle, not the guy you who plans out how to deal with those pesky monsters. Unless thats how you plan on writing him.

6. This gives me bad feelings that he's going to save the Mane Six. Your story, of course, but knowing the history of these ponies the odds are in their favor of surviving.

7. He has a supposed cousin.

8. So he has no life other than the next job? How is that suppose to make him interesting. This guy is not a robot with no other concerns besides looking for work.

9. Okay.

10. Which I am sure the reader will find out about in the story.

EXTRA comment: The alicorn part of your character; don't do it. Its not worth the grief you will get if you fail at pulling this off successfully and by what you have put on this character sheet there is not much there for him to earn that right. I am guilty of the same thing when making a character but as said character develops I tend to shave off the silly stuff for something a little more real for the story involved.

Is it central to the plot that your character become a Alicorn. Ascending to that level takes a certain amount of pizzazz and effort, even if your not purposely working towards that goal. Cadence pulled it off because she saved all love in Equestria. You already know the story behind Twilight Sparkle. It takes great effort and sacrifice to be that level of powerful.

So far nothing in this write up warrants him getting Alicorn status.

3/10

He is a little two dimensional for my taste because nothing about his describe traits stick out. It's nothing I haven't seen before but carefully planning can take these very same traits and make them more interesting than how they are presented this moment.

That is my opinion on the matter. Happy writing.

3972781 Thanks so much for responding so well to my OC, even though I wrote this months before. I'm glad someone like you took the time to look over my OC and tell me everything that is wrong with him in full detail, it may not have been positive but I'm happy either way. Fortunately my story has reached up to chapter ten and I haven't looked back since. Thank you

1. Vell Cynthia Eclipse

2.

(Adult, planning to change one of her forepaws into a more dragon-y hand, plus will play around with her eyes)

(Teen)

2.1. Female

2.2. Draconequus x Pony = Ponyequus

3. After her sister was born by an accident, her parents (Discord and Twilight) saw how wonderful she was and decided to have another kid. Worst mistake of their lives, even if they love her. Being judged as a baby, many ponies didn't see her fit to walk around freely, to be treated like an actual pony. This resulted in her being judgmental herself, often just plain hating people off the bat due to her thinking they'll see her as a beast. School was hard, as many ponies would isolate her, so she often responded with angry gestures and such to fight off the pain, telling herself that they're just bad people. They don't deserve her kindness. She became very close with her dad due to her hating the fact her mom always acting like what society wanted a princess to act like, and her respect for Discord always staying true to himself. He's her role model, even if she's not nesscairly a chaos fan. Her friens throughout high school helped her open up a bit, but she's still very reclusive and hateful against people besides her parents and friends.

4. Personality. Judgmental, angry, warm to those she knows well, protective of the ones she loves, appreciates the simpler things in life such as nature, books, painting, etc., balls up her emotions in fear of ponies seeing her as weak, a bit of a showoff, chooses brutal justice over mercy, is socially awkward though she'll try to pretend to be cool, actually just hates hanging out with people in general, prefers a quiet day at home with a good book and hot chocolate/coffee, can get overwhelmed fast when at something like a party, oh and she's bisexual which lead to her being a bit reclusive, brave, sometimes a bit too brave, would kill more than a fly when stressed...

5. She uses her magic like Tirek does, only her antler glow. She actually has magical ties with the sun and moon due to her parent's extreme magical abilities, though since her body isn't well equipped to handle such magic she can't really use it well. The most she can do is summon a magical sword, but anything beyond that could make her pass out from exhaustion. Her special talent is using her abilities to defend Equestria in general from black magic and such. Oh, and if she gets really angry or just emotional in general her magic can go haywire and end up blowing something up, but it results in her being in a near death state. In fact, she could just die on the spot.

6. Relations with canon characters. Very close with Discord and Twilight due to them being her parents. She's also close with Rarity and Luna due to the fact they're her and her sister's godparents. Also has relationships will all of the mane six due to her knowing their kids. And... well yeah, don't really know where to go from here. Guess I could say she knows all of Ponyville .Oh, and Celestia is like an aunt to her, plus Cadence and Shinning armor and all of Twi's family are... well, her family too. Very close with her grandfather and Shinning Armor actually too due to Night Light and her loving astronomy and Shinning Armor being, in her words, "A total badass of an uncle."

7. Relations with other OC's, if there are any. Had a relationship with Applejack's daughter Willow until she died, is now dating Fluttershy's son Golden Seed, best friends with her sister Autumn Shine, plus Rainbow's daughter Rainbow Shine, meh friends with Rainbow's son Firewave, and... yeah, still working out some other relations.

8. Social life. To kill time, she'll paint, draw, write, read, or just sit outside and admire nature. Sometimes even unwind with one or two of her calmer friends. Can get wild though, and the moment she turned twenty one she drank like a dragon. Plus she's nowhere near a light weight, while Willow was on the floor vomiting in minutes. Sometimes she'll sing when alone too. Will kill prank people when they get on her nerves, or just prank someone when bored. Also may study with her mom, and sit with her dad in her very own Thinking Tree, which is the willow tree outside that she planted when younger. Yelling at people because she doesn't like them is also a hobby of hers. Oh, an laziness too.

9. Main Character.

10. Many of her friends call her a bitch, but they still love her.