Hi. My name is Tale Spinner, and I like to read about adorable ponies doing adorable things.
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My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
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Because everyone makes mistakes:
I'm fairly certain there's a dialogue change in this paragraph. It needs a new paragraph.
It shows certain promise. I'm assuming TwiDance. I approve. To the point I'd like to offer my services as an editor, prereader, and amorological advisor to your story.
Sounds interesting. For the moment will add this to read later.
Hmm... I'll give this story a chance... It might take me a while to get around to it but i'll get to eventually... Curenly i'm in an all out war over the next chapter to my story Unseeing Eyes so forgive me if it's like a week or more (Also please forgive the shameless self promotion )! So... Read you when I read you!
5695353 Yes, there will be TwiDance aplenty. However, I'm a bit confused as to where you see the dialogue change? There isn't one, but I'd like to know where you see it. Feel free to send me a PM, should you so desire.
As for being an editor... Well, I could always use one. Especially when I'm a bit low on self-confidence and pretty sure my work is full of errors. We can talk about that in a PM too.
And I'm glad you approve!
5695401 Well, I'm actually off to bed right now. So I'll take a looksie tomorrow, probably after my classes. I look forward to your input, even if it is a week later!
5695380 As I said to the above, I do look forward to hearing your input, should you so deign to give it. I'm glad you at least think it sounds interesting. I struggled with the idea for a long time.
This was interesting indeed.
I am going to love this. A lot XD
What the fuck did celestia do to shinings mind? I saw what she did there.
*groans* Don't tell me that celestia fucked everything up
5695417 if Shining is the one calling the ambassador the "Griffon Thingie", why is he expressing a theoretical concern if Cadence was the ambassador?
I also added your story to several groups to reach a broader audience.
If you'd really like it, I'd be happy to reserve a service slot for you.
5695479
This line was directly prior to Shining calling it a griffon thingie.
Also, I suppose I'll send you a PM of the next chapter upon its completion?
5695479
5695525
My guess is that it's actually Chrysalis disguised as Celestia. She wants to switch out his guards for her Changelings and ruin his marriage to push a wedge between Cadance and Shining Armor.
That's not Celestiaaaaaaaaa!
5695525 I will have you know that I read a chapter at least three times while editing so I don't miss things like that. Sounds good, your service slot is reserved at number three.
Honestly... I kind of want to read this, but at the same time I fear that Shining Armor is going to get the short end of the stick, because he often seems to in TwiDance stories...
5696844 Well, I can honestly say that while Shining Armour and Cadance will probably break up due to this... thing... His story will end well. Not well with Cadance, but I don't give my ponies sad endings.
5699042
Well there's no evidence it's definitely going to go wrong, and no reason to doubt that you intend to give all your characters a happy ending... but I will say the central concept is that the Alicorn of Love rejects Shining Armor over something (as to yet unrevealed) and then moves on with his little sister instead.
Pulling Shining Armor out of that pit of self-esteem obliteration satisfactorily is going to be a challenge. So, if you've got a good plan for an outcome for him, I'm looking forward to it.
and the manipulative bitch they call 'Princess' makes an appearance, and shows her true colors so early in the game. stupid power drunk whore.
Rings false.
Shining Armor just recently had an experience with impostor using mind magic.
Now Celestia is acting weird and using mind magic on him? He should`ve raised an alarm just for that, not mull over the "guard assignments".
wow these comments you can really feel th love and tolerance
5706529 The love is real up in here :D
nice. Just. nice. XD
I reserved a service slot for you, but never received a message regarding those services from you. If you don't want me to edit, that's fine, but then its a slot I need to reopen.
Oh. Never mind then. Oops.
A Game of Thrones and a Skyrim reference in the same paragraph? Too much!
5707004 If you really want to edit for me, I'd be happy to have you. But there are better stories you could put your efforts toward.
Further, it's just... I've never had somebody edit my stories before. I'm not too sure how you'd want the story, and in what format, all that fun stuff.
All in all, I've always proofread my own stories, and I've never had anypony's help. If you can forgive my incompetence this time and PM me the format you want the story in and all those other details, I'd be willing to give it a shot and have you as my editor for the next chapter.
I hope you understand. But if you'd rather put your efforts toward a much better story, I'd understand too. Once again, it's not that I don't want you, it's just that I don't have the easiest time working with others on my stories, especially when I'm an ignorant little fuck who doesn't even know what I'm supposed to be doing.
5695417 *Finishes Reading Chapter 1 Does Double Take at The End*
...
...
...
Yeah shit's going to hit the fan explosively... Excuse me while I go prepare my stabbing pillow... Also will you be needing SA after the story is over? Something tells me that he's going to need an introduction to one of my specially patent Gender swapping Potions and a rather rude machine that I discovered while perusing New Grounds' Adult section.
5711850 Well, Shining will fall to a secondary character eventually, but I may put him in the sequel so he can help Celestia with... Whoops...
i.imgur.com/G2D6dEg.jpg
It's not might.
It's yes. XD
So it appears that our bug is building something in the crystal empire eh?
interesting
5714800 twilight.ponychan.net/chan/arch/src/130779226755.png
5714920 'Twould seem as if the mystery is deepening. I wonder what good ol' Tia's up to in that new palace of hers? Hopefully she's not breeding an army to destroy the world of men. Naw, she's just putting in a new home theater system. Nothin' to worry about.
5715481
A plot can also be used as a really good sex device
s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/736x/d0/63/95/d063957a0fd768f266e34fe45a764c38.jpg
5699850 you...didn't look at the character tags did you? I mean...seriously. this should be obvious.
Are we having a case of bitchlestia here?
5715481 so is this story dead.... or what?
8130323 Yeah, kinda. For some reason, the whole thing with Flurry Heart in canon really sapped my love for Twidance. I might come back to it some day, but for now it's pretty much dead. Sorry.
If it helps, here's some coot princesses doing adorable milkshake things
s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/originals/a2/62/24/a26224b4866c9ef7354dd76029793c3e.jpg
Hope you come back to this story spinner! Never let a good story go to waste, game of thrones should have tought you that too!