Before the Night Alternative · 8:52am Nov 5th, 2023
so, i plan on making another sequel for Before the Night. It forks off from the rest of the series, and basically goes… what if Starlight never showed up during the party. I have the half of the first chapter.
Give me your thoughts, and here is that first draft for those who wanna see it.
Tonight was going to be a special night for me, according to Luna. It’s already been well over a year since I’ve come to Equestria, and she and Celestia wanted to give me an award for so handily defending Everfree City through sheer force of will. So, like any good coltfriend, I snuck out of the palace instead of trying suits on. Me and Blaze wanted to go explore, maybe pick up an odd job here and there. I hopped up on Blaze’s back, since she grew a little over the last year, and was the size of Celestia now. So I just hop up on her back and ride her on occasion. Since she is apparently defiant in gravity, she can jump out a window on my back, and land on her paws without breaking me or her legs.
I guess. My fox doesn’t make a whole lot of sense; she’s literally a magical fox.
“You know, Luna is going to tear into you for leaving before she can dress you up in a suit before the big party later, right?”
“Meh, women beating their boyfriends up is nothing new. The only difference is Luna can, and will kick my ass harder than most.” I chuckled as we started walking around town.
The main difference with how I walk around town now, and how I walked around town before I saved it from getting slaughtered was… Less glares, I guess. Foals absolutely loved and idolized me. There were a few pegasus families judging by the census, and they all happily waved at me and would even let their foals near Blaze purely because she was my pet. While we wandered around, we came across a caravan of… familiar ponies setting up apples, carrots, all sorts of various crops and a couple stacks of hay bales. “Oh fuck…” I saw Crab Apple and Golden Delicious amongst that group of ponies.
The Apples were back.
“Yo!” I galloped past Blaze, who was busy being harassed by a bunch of foals… as in she flopped on her back and was letting them rub her belly. Her eyes opened, and she gently moved the foals before running after me. “Crab Apple! It’s good to see y’all!” I skidded to a stop… and fell on my face before the petite mare.
“You still can’t run properly,” Crab chuckled. “It’s good to see you, Ostri… Why the buck are you still in Everfree City? I thought the nobles would’ve made you throw up by now.”
“Oh, that’s pretty simple. I’m sleeping with a Princess now,” I said plainly.
“You’re Celestia’s new consort?”
“No, she’s dating somepony else, and I think she wants to try and introduce him publicly at the party later,” I shook my head. “No, I’m dating Luna.”
“Yer dating the devil?” Golden asked as she trotted up to us.
“Oi, that devil is my marefriend…” I rolled my eyes. “Seriously, you’re a cute mare, Golden, I don’t wanna have to give you a black eye because you insulted Luna. She’s actually really nice once you get to know her, and when she’s out in public with Celestia, I catch more stallions trying to look at her flanks over Celestia, so I know I got the better Princess,” both mares present snorted.
“Stallions, only caring about a mare’s flank, and not the mare herself-”
“Luna squeaks like a kitten when I nip her neck,” I said shrugged. “She also snores like a kitten. Seriously, Lulu is very sweet, and yelled at me for defending the City from a fuckload of griffins, while on the front lines… I sucker punched the general and stabbed him in the shoulder. It was great.”
“We heard about that,” Crab said. “Which is why we decided to stop by Everfree City first to trade our stuff… Things like carrots grew fine while potatoes didn’t grow at all for some reason. We used the same fields at our camp, so I don’t know why they didn’t grow.”
“Oh. Next time you grow potatoes, grow them in the carrot field, and grow the potatoes in the carrot field. I don’t know the full jist of how soil works, but switching fields every year helps the soil stay fresh or something. So next year, swap which fields you grow which crops in, and then swap them back the year after that. Rinse and repeat. That should help, I think.”
“And how do you know this’ll help?”
“Celestia has researchers looking into it. A benefit of dating royalty, aside from cuddling with a very fluffy Luna, is access to behind the scenes research. So far, it seems like swapping crops out each year is very effective for farming.”
“We’ll have to try that then,” Crab nodded. “So how is Luna in bed?”
“She showed me what she looks like in her battle armor one day… That was pretty hot. Though we’ve only been in bed together, to do the birds and the bees, once. Once we get married, I think Luna’ll wanna try for foals, and we’ll have all sorts of fun later. For now though, I’m mainly making sure she stays mentally stable; being demonized since the ripe age of twelve, and then being seen as a demon by your own subjects can fuck with a mare’s psyche.” I grabbed a newspaper from a nearby newspaper boy. “Look at this shit, dude.”
“I’m a mare, not a stallion.”
“Shush. Just read,” I handed them the headline. “Demon rides off success of Celestia’s consort’s escapades.” I said before shrugging. “By the way, this article’s about me. Me and Celestia are good friends, but I’m not her consort even if she and Luna can legally share me. They’re saying I’m Celly’s consort,” I snorted. “Yet I'm sure a few of them saw Luna in a sundress, at night, with me shortly after I recovered from my injuries, having a lovely little picnic with me.”
“...Jeez. We country folk just make her out to be the boogie mare to keep our foals in line. The nobles-”
“Yeah, they hate Luna for no reason. If shit doesn’t straighten out, I’m taking Luna next month, and we’re leaving ruling to Celestia. Sure, Sunbutt’ll hate that I made that call, but she isn’t doing shit to help Luna out at all. They barely even interact just… as sisters unless the government shuts down because of a blizzard. When they act as sisters, they’re absolutely fun to watch; seeing Luna get teased over trying to look at my butt is very cute.” I chuckled. “I’m probably gonna kill a noble at this rate.”
“I wouldn’t blame you,” Golden looked over the article. “Some are making you out to be a demon as well, sent by Luna to corrupt Celestia.”
“...By listening to Celestia as she reads out a play she wrote when she was twelve?” I shook my head. “Oh well. How long are y’all staying in town? I think I can get you guys into the big ol’ party that’s happening later. I can even show you what Luna is actually like, or you can sell your food at the party and get some extra bits. Maybe… nah, you would not want to date some stuffy prick who can’t see his hindlegs ‘cause he’s a fatass, worthless sack of shit.”
“Sheesh, Ostri, those are some mean words… and you’re right, I wouldn’t wanna date a noble,” Crab chuckled. “If you can get us in though, we won’t pass up on the invite.”
“Sick. Well, me and Blaze wanna go check out some odd jobs we can do.”
“Blaze?” I pointed at the fox that was now resting her head on top of mine.
“What the buck is that?” Both mares said in unison. Blaze simply answered them by barking and nuzzling me.
“My pet fox. She’s a bit overgrown, a bit magical, but she’s my pet fox. She’s a sweet little thing; she won’t bite.”
“I also can communicate-” both mares flopped on the ground, their legs twitching. “I broke them, Ostri.”
“...God dammit Blaze,” I chuckled and helped the Apples move their fallen family members into a nearby wagon so that they wouldn’t get trampled while the rest of them did some work. After that, the two of us made our way down to town square and picked a random job. There was a job that involved going through traps that had been placed by a previous odd-worker, and seeing if there was anything in those traps. Such as furs for clothes, weird creatures, anything at all. Since it paid a fair amount, and because it would take the least amount of time if Blaze carried me, we took it.
The first few traps we came across were empty, but part of our job was collecting the traps so that they could be used for later. So Blaze pulled a wagon that she let me strap on her. “I’m more than a farm animal, you know,” she scoffed as I tossed another trap into the wagon.
“Hey, in my world, if I were the way I am now, I’d be the dumb, stupid animal pulling the cart. I even offered, but then you said I’d throw my back out if I did.”
“You got shot in the butt with an arrow, Ostri, I am not allowing you to get hurt again. And I’m not going to let you hurt yourself by pulling something. I have no muscles, or bones, as I am mostly made of magic. So I might as well take the load.”
“You just wanna complain for the sake of complaining,” I pointed out.
“I’m hoping to guilt trip you into massaging me after the party later. I may not have muscles, but I still have senses; you touching me feels good.”
“Wow, that can be taken so poorly out of context,” we both giggled. “Hey, what’s growling and hissing?” I asked as we came upon the location of the last trap. It was only midday, and the party in my name was to be at sun down. As we got closer, we could see… a pony of some sort. It looked very buglike and was nearly as tall as Luna, but she was clearly younger. Her voice sounded a lot like a teenage girl, as she was muttering and panicking slightly at how dead she was.
Her hair was wispy and almost looked like it was made out of the same membranes as her wings. The tail matched. Her legs were long, lanky, and were more slender than even Celestia’s… She looks half-starved. On top of that… her left foreleg was caught in the trap we were supposed to grab. Apparently, the traps had a magical locking mechanism, a recent discovery, that could only be undone by whoever set the locking spell up, or if you had a special key that I was given for the job. Basically, this girl was stuck. As we got closer, the mare noticed us and started hissing at us. A snakelike tongue slithered in between some very, very sharp teeth.
“What the actual fuck are you?”
“Why should you care, pony? Just kill me and-” he horn lit.
“Whoa there,” I raised my hooves. “You’re clearly not a dumb animal, so let’s not get violent here. Who are you, what are you, and will you try to kill me if I let you out?” I asked.
“In your language, my name is Princess Chrysalis, secondly, I am a Changeling Princess, and lastly, if you free me I will not cause you harm. I… Will you hurt me?”
“Tell me why the hell you’re out here, and if you keep being peaceful, I won’t lay a hoof on you.”
“I… My kind feeds on love,” what? “I know, I am quite weird, the last few pony settlements told me that before chasing me out. I’m trying to feed, mostly so I don’t die, but also so that I may mature into a Queen. Once I am Queen, I can begin looking for a spot to build up my own Hive, to have children. I swear, I can get love ambiently, but it tastes better when it’s willingly given, and I don’t want to hurt anyone for love. Just… Don’t hurt me, please?” She tilted her head. Her big ol’, snakelike eyes dialed in on me as I got closer.
She’s adorable!
“Well, I still did my job if I brought back empty traps,” I reached down to her hoof and slid the key into the lock. With a click, it came off, and her hoof… This lady’s in a carapace. That didn’t stop her from caressing her probably aching limb.
“...You actually believe me?”
“Hey,” Blaze spoke up. “Ostri, the pony you’re speaking to believes you are adorable and deserve to be hugged. He was the same with me, and he had taken a job to, unknowingly, kill me. It’s how we met.”
“A kitsune?” Chrysalis tilted her head. “What are you doing out here?”
“...My mother was a bit… dramatic,” Blaze answered.
Chrysalis then turned to me. “Deserve to be hugged?”
“Hey, to me you sound like a teenager who was just trapped, and now you sound like a teenager who just needs a hug.”
“...Well, a hug would feed me with affection; I can feed on other emotions, but love is very important,” she hummed. “Will you hug me?” I scooped her up and hugged her. “Oh this feels nice…” she whispered. “Thank you,” she shivered when I let her go. “Now I’m full… and I genuinely did need the hug, as you said. It’s been so long since I’ve interacted with anyone who would’ve been nice to me, and that was when I left my mother’s Hive to start my own life.” She dug at the ground for a moment. “Can I follow you home?”
“...Why the hell not? I wouldn’t mind having another friend. Just know my home’s a little big.”
“Why is that?” Chrysalis tilted her head again and her ears flopped. Seriously, changelings, judging from this one, are adorable.
btw, i might put New horizons on hiatus, since i do have an end goal in mind with this alternative universe, whereas New Horizons does not have an end goal. plus it would get hard to write for Ostri in New Horizons, who’s more pissed and mentally broken than Before the Night Ostri.
Calling ostri might accend or something similer by accident
That seem good! It felt a little too rushed that this special day, return of the apples, and meeting with chysalis happened at the same time. Maybe expanded it a little bit? How about a scene where they decided to give ostri award?
Looks pretty good but if this au that works the same expect for starlight shouldn't he have met queenie already.
So, for future reference, any similarities between the Kitsune in your stories and the Kitsune in my stories are merely coincidence and i am not copying off anyone.
I like this AU a lot!
to be honest I didn't manage to finish the timeline where Ostri goes to the present, didn't really vibe with the turn of Luna being a massive witch