Idea 1983:Chaos rats fight ponies with third party help

Imagine a scene in an underground lab complex.
Something like the one in the Stargate series.

A balding army colonel sat at a brown desk large enough for eight people. He ran his fingers through what was left of his hair then he sighed. “Let's get this show on the road.” Then he jabbed one of the buttons in front of him.

For a few moments, nothing happened. Then a flickering image of a lavender alicorn appeared.
“Hello, Colonel Harris.”

Colonel Harris smiled. “Hello to you, Princess Twilight Sparkle. How goes it today?”

“Well,-” She looked to her right. “Spike, press your button! You're a part of this meeting too. I hope you read your briefing packet.”

An image of a small green dragon with a purple crest appeared. “Twilight, five pages might be a packet ,but fifty is definitely tome sized. I got past the third page. Needed a lot of coffee.”

Twilight Sparkle's eyes narrowed. “Spike!”

At that moment, a white guy wearing a brown leather jacket and brown pants stepped into the room. His brown eyes widened. “What the hell? A pegacorn with a big round head!”

“I'm an alicorn and my head isn't that big,” Twilight huffed.

The guy sat at the table. “Really, that big head is sooo not aerodynamic. Can't win money from you at the racetrack.”

Twilight's eyes narrowed.

Spike giggled.

While this was going on, Colonel Harris looked into the alcove in the table for the guy's polymorph notice. A polymorph notice is a form on a datapad that shows someone their new shape. He found Stephen Hewitt's notice. “Stephen Hewitt, here's your polymorph notice.”

“Aw, crap really?” Stephen asked as a frown covered his face. “The worse missions I had except for one always involved a p-notice. Why do I have to be something else?”

“I'll tell everyone once they're here. Please take your notice,” Colonel Harris said and then held up Stephen's p-notice.

Stephen walked over and got his notice and went back to his chair. “Really, a round headed pony?”

“Do you have a big head?” Twilight asked.

Stephen shrugged. “Maybe I'll be hung like a stallion?”

Spike frowned. “Why do they hang stallions in your world?”

Stephen smiled. “Well, if you lose too many races or grab too many mare's private parts...”

Colonel Harris frowned. “Alright, enough of that.”

Spike turned to Twilight. “Do they hang stallions here?”

A quick blush crossed Twilight's face. “Um, Spike, let's discuss that subject later.”

“Awww!” Spike said and looked around.

A black guy wearing a dark suit and sunglasses entered the room. “Stevie?”

Stephen looked at the new guy. “Oh crap, Mo?” Then he got up and hugged the guy.

Colonel Harris looked through his small pile of p-notices until he found one for Morris Townsend.

“I thought you'd join us in the Ukraine,” Stephen said while heading back to his seat.

Morris took off his sunglasses and put them in the pocket of his suit. “Nah, I was still in Somalia. Not sure why they sent me here.”

“Morris Townsend, please take your p-notice,” Colonel Harris said.

Morris walked over and got his p-notice. His face fell. “A zebra? A weird two-legged zebra with a large round head like a human? What sort of mission is this?”

Stephen laughed. “Hey man, things are getting weird in the Ukraine.”

Morris shook his head. “I doubt things are that weird in the Ukraine.”

Twilight peered at the goings on. “What's a p-notice?”

“That's what you get before you have to p,” Spike said then laughed.

Colonel Harris sighed. “I'll tell you all why we need the notices when the rest of the command team is here. Don't worry, you all will be briefed. Princess, a Polymorph Notice or a p-notice is a form that notifies a person that they will be changed to another shape.”

“I wonder if they need a briefing packet?” Spike said.

"Who does the shape changing? These people know how to change their forms?" Twilight asked.

"Actually, none of the folks here can shape change on their own. A third party named Oonte will be doing the changing for us," Colonel Harris said.

The door opened and a blonde, blue-eyed man wearing a gray uniform strode into the room and took a seat.

Anger flashed across Stephen's face. “Stroycker!”

Hans Stroycker waved his left hand dismissively. “I've apologized for that so many times. Let it be Hewitt.”

Stephen shot Hans some stinkeye.

“Hans Stroycker, please get your p-notice,” Colonel Harris said while holding the datapad.

Hans got the datapad and frowned. When he sat in his seat he said,”Really, sir, a unicorn?”

Stephen grinned. “Now that's a horse that should be hung. Right from the highest rooftop!”

Hans clenched his fists.

Morris grabbed Stephen's arm. “Not now man!”

The door opened and a short white woman with wavy shoulder-length hair walked into the room. Her brown eyes locked on Hans. “Hey, Hans, how goes it?”

Hans nodded. “I'm fine, Emily A shame about world 342.”

Emily shrugged. “Who knew that the necromancer had a dead man switch or should I say, undead man switch? As they say, the dog was truly screwed.”

Twilight's eyes widened. “Humans have sex with dogs?”

Emily smiled. “Humans will screw and screw up anything. Even lavender pegacorns.”

Twilight's eyes narrowed.

“Ms. Barton, please take your p-notice,”Colonel Harris said. He held up her datapad.

Emily held out her skinny right hand, and the datapad floated out of the Colonel's hand, and across the room until she grabbed it. “Ugh, a unicorn. Why does it have to be so obvious, I'm a magic user?”

“What's wrong with being a unicorn?” Twilight asked.

Colonel Harris sighed. This meeting was already feeling like it was going on too long. “Ms. Barton, you don't have to hide that you're a magic user here.”

Emily shrugged and waved her right hand dismissively. “Fine.” She sat down.

The way the human Emily acted reminded Twilight of Rarity. Twilight found it also interesting that human telekinesis was colorless.

Colonel Harris sighed again. Now, he knew why his hair was disappearing. “Time to brief you on the mission...”