Hands: Correlation or Causation? · 3:27pm Nov 19th, 2019
After Fluttershy reforms Discord she ascends to alicornhood: Much to her and everyone else's surprise...
Shepherd: "Woah! That's amazing!"
Fluttershy: "O-Oh my..."
Twilight: *Hugs her with a smile* "Wow! Great work, Fluttershy! Welcome to the ranks of royalty!"
Shepherd: "Will she need her own castle?"
Fluttershy: "I-I hope not..."
Rainbow Dash: "So... Every pony who's ever slept with Shepherd has ascended to alicornhood, huh?
All eyes are now on Shepherd, who coughs
Shepherd: "I'm sure that had nothing to do with it... Right Twilight?"
Twilight: "Well, we can't rule it out as a factor without experimentation to determine if it's causation-SHEPHERD GET BACK HERE!"
Shepherd is running for his life.
Shepherd: "NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE!"
And everyone else is galloping after him.
Pinkie: "I WANNA BE PARTY PRINCESS!"
Dash: "I WANT TO BE THE PRINCESS OF AWESOME!"
Rarity: "ROYALTY HERE I COME!"
Twilight: "SCIENCE!"
Fluttershy: "DON'T SLEEP WITH MY COLTFRIEND WITHOUT ME!"
Spike: "DEATH TO HUMANS!"
Applejack: *rolls her eyes* "Hopeless, all of 'em..."
And then she adjusts her hat to better hide her horn. The wings she's kept close to her sides, letting change blindness do the work.
Hey, she's in no hurry to trade that hat for a tiara. They don't even realize she's Duchess Ponyville.
5157703
Also, the entire town is her Demesne, and therefore all seven of them, by virtue of being residents, are technically her property.
That poor guy is going to become a very popular fellow in Equestria whether he wants to or not.
> Is still running after him
They are going to dry him!
The Grand Archmage watches as Shepherd runs past him, several strings of mares closing on his heels. He can only catch a few words in the galloping herd, but some of the phrases he caught indicated sex and coronation. Frowning, he shakes his head.
"THAT ISN'T HOW THAT WORKS!" Steevn shouts above the roar of the crowd, "NOW BECALM THY TEATS!"
"Uh, howdy there, stranger," a familiar voices says to Steve's right. The mage of the Terran Empire looks down to see a gamboge pony in a Stetson hat.
"Howdy," Steve replies.
"Say, uh, ya'll wouldn't happen to know how a pony becomes royalty, would ya?" this tangent's Applejack asks the human.
"I might know a thing or sixteen," Steve answers, "and I'm 99.99999999% certain that having sex with a man like Andrew Shepherd does not guarantee Ascension to Alacornhood."
"Ah, I see," Applejack says, "much obliged. Oh, 'fore I ferget, what's yer name, Stranger?"
"Steven," The Grand Archmage states, "Steven Edwin Ambrose, Grand Archmage of the Arcane Empire of Terra. And you're Applejack, owner/operator of Sweet Apple Acres."
"Well gosh," Applejack exclaims, "how'd ya know alla that?"
"Where I come from, there's another just like you," Steven answers, "right down the cute freckles that bridge your muzzle."
"Aw, shucks," Applejack says but before she can formulate a decent reply, there's a brilliant light and the human in sweeping robes is gone…