The Rewrites To Redemption: Chapters 13 & 14 · 12:25am Jan 21st, 2020
Alright horsefuckers, these two chapters are where the story started getting longer and now there's about 6 thousand words added to both. First and foremost, with Re: 13: Max has more reasons to like Velvet Breeze and their relationship generally makes more sense. I also gave her some background that was much needed, gave her an actual age, and made the woman less... bland in general, I guess. As for Max and Sunbutt, their reunion is a little less 'Oh shit, um...' and is a bit more 'Yeah, so I replaced you already... My bad'. It's generally sweeter, changed up some tones, and made the story read a little better to my eyes. Here's hoping it worked.
As for Re:14, the entire interaction with Applejack got revamped and is now more Human, I'd say. There's no more silliness involved, and the first reunion with Fluttershy might be a touch more hostile. I also touched up the sex so that it was better in my eyes, but that reminds me that there really isn't all that much in the story. I'm not mad or even disappointed about that.
Rewrites will continue, but putting over 6k into each of them and probably doing 4k apiece of reworks to diction in them bitches...
Rough. Just rough. We'll see how the rest goes, but I don't know where I'm going to stop with rewrites as of yet.
As Always, Stay Cool, Kids
At the rate you're going, maybe half or even the whole story will get some rewrites. Woo now i can read it again, finished some other stories i was reading.
5189526
Right now I'm hoping to pump half the story up, but iImight do the whole thing. There's a lot of crap iI want to touch up, which was easier in the chapters I've been doing, but 14? Difficult and time consuming. There was a lot to change and it was a long boi anyway at 25k