MARES AND GENETLECOLTS...I PRESENT TO YOU... THE FIRST OF THE RE-EDITS!!! (Presented by Samsung's 16K TV's)

Yeah I'm just throwing blog updates around like it ain't shit...am I right?

Anyways as the title suggests, I've been working on the re-edits, despite me saying I would do after I finish Season 1. But two things changed my mind.

1. I'll have about 16 in total to do, and my idea to break up the stuff and also give myself a bit of a boost in moral, I could o maybe a re-edit in between every new episode posted. It'll give me a head start, I know it'll benefit you guys since yeah, it's bad that's how I have it and it shouldn't, but to put it shortly, things get fucked sometimes and you just have to lay in it and do your best to fix it. That and it'll mix things up for me.

2. I watched Boast Busters again for the 30th time last night thanks to my rips that I've got, and I watched it and got a few ideas what I could do to add to Episode 10. And the more I thought about it, the more I just wanted to jump right on it while I have that energy and strike while the iron is hot. So yeah...

So uhh, here's a rough outline of how it is going to be, I'll color mark it for your convenience so you know what is what...

And it isn't that big or long to begin with so it isn't that big of a deal. The original one was only 1,690 words long. Which is really weird considering what I write nowadays...by a lot... like 200K...

So yeah, Ill get that out as soon as possible, shouldn't be long. And I know I jinx myself when I say that and it ends being half a year, but I believe it this time since what you'll see is all there is. I just need to write it and that's it. I'm only expecting it to be around 20K, little less, little more. Something like that... so yeah... I'll let you know when it's done.

Also please excuse any spelling errors, it's still a work in progress and I typically take care of that later. I mean I was on the fence on showing you guys but fuck it, with the Re-edits, it doesn't matter, you already know so show away. Also the Title wile be changed from The Magnificent Douchebag to Boast Busters Your Blue Balls. I liked the other name, it's just that I want to be consistent with the other parody episode titles...

Blue = Details / New Story bits yet to be added
Red = What was from the original
Green = What new stuff was added recently

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Episode 10: Boast Buster Your Blue Balls HD (Re-Edit Version Presented in Samsung 16K

Well, we finally continued with history repeating itself. Ain’t that a son of a bitch. But hey, that’s how the Universe was treating me, like a fucking dog. The minute think I can live, it keeps putting me down. I think that’s a good anaology. Whatever, when this day came, it was all about repeating Episode 6, Boast Busters. Not the greatest of all episodes to repeat, but hey, it couldn’t be any worse than Mare Do Well, am I right? Sad part is though, I jinxed myself a long ass time ago, but eh, what do I care anymore?

In addition, just to let you know how everybody went with his or her fake memories, it was ok. Although, Arrell has a little hazy memory of those events, but doesn’t remember it completely. If he does remember it, then I’m sorry, but I have to put him down. The Jews don’t want him to remember. If he knows too much then it will ruin the Jews plan and all of their sheckles will be have meant for nothing. I mean what Jewish conspiracy. The Jews weren’t kicked out of 106 countries. It is definitely was the 6 million that dies and not just a front for the mafia so they can get a tax write off as a business expanse every time they eat at a Subway.

Shhhhh, the Jew nose, and you do not.

Anyways, after the last time I had to repeat an episode form the show in this world, I was given a letter by Celestia to practice some magic. She gave me something’s that I could practice with as well as a letter from Twilight where she gave some suggestions on what shecdule I could go on and what I could to better myself and my self esteem. And in at the end she gave a little heart, implying that crush she had on me then was trill strong as steel.

Spike event wrote a letter, written in crayon and looked like it was written by a retard child that was meant to be put down, but then the mother said, “But my baby is perfect. There’s nothing wrong with my baby. Look at it, it’s beautiful” as the child has bulged out eyes and a lisp with a survival chance of less than point five percent. Yeah we’re talking about that kind of child.

Anyways, Wolf got a letter from Spike on what he could do to help me, but at the end of the day Wolf just pukes up the letter whenever he pukes up last night’s drinks. To put t simply, Wolf hates how Celestia made it to where Wolf can receive letters. But sometimes it is an amusment to me to watch Wolf forcibly upchuck paper against his won will. It gives me a chuckle every now and then reminds there is a little hope in this world.

I know it sounds like I’m an asshole, but hey, come on…we’re all a little bit of an asshole at heart. Except for Jack, he was a one hundred percent asshole. And he was proud if it to, in which case… fair enough? Anyways, in the end Wolf didn’t read Spike’s letter as it just gets mixed in with the puke and it gets fucked up to where you can barely read it, so it didn’t matter much anyways.

And to add insult to the wound, I didn’t care about the letters as usual. I just threw it to the side lines as usual. Besides, doesn’t she know how powerful my magic already is? Well, she probably does, but she thinks I can improve, in which case that’s true, but do I care? Nope, by this point, I’m only here for the fre housing and money that gets sent to me every now and then from them while the Universe pegs me from behind. She, I’m not all fucked, sure the Universe is metaphorically raping me from my ass, but at least I get free stuff out of the tax payer’s money. Now morally that’s wrong and under normal circumstances I would actually cxare and get a separate jb to support myself, but this isn’t normal circumstances. This is a land where colorful talking ponies that use magic are involved, so to that, I’d say give me all the free shit that you can give me and I’ll make the ebst of it.

I mean I’’m not upset about the whole talking pony thing, I’m just upset that I don’t get to go my own way ahd have to instead relive the episodes. I mean it would be cool I guess if it was with the Elements of harmony, but at the end of the day, that is not case.Instead, I’m living through twisted versions of the episodes from the show, and sometimes I wonder if the Universe itself is a Brony, you know? Who knows, maybe the Universe is a clopper as wel, and cloppers usually get defensive about their feitsh so I better shut my mouth now. I’m kidding, I’m kidding…except for the clopper part. Look, you want to fuck a horse’s ass, I get it. There are live horses where you are at, just go ovet there and let the horse peg you because I know yo’re a sicko that’s into that sick shit. Just don’t come complaining to me when a baby horse pops out of your asshole nine months later.

Anyways, still I didn’t care about Celestia’s letters. I mean, I have over a thousand spells written and created by me. Well not really, those numbers are inflated in hopes the dexcription for the journal sells. Really it was like acouple of hundred spells that were created by me and half of it was for the covinence of me and Wolf. But mostly me, and sometimes only for Wolf. Hey, that weed and sometimes alchoal has to come from somewhere you know. And the princesses don’t give me and Wolf enough bits every two weeks to spend it on fllierish things. I have to pay bills every now and then. I need to pay a “tax” that is really just a money laundering scheme to the town of Stalia. Well ahyways, I just ended up smoking weed while Wolf got drunk.

But that’s not how I’m starting this part of my life off. Oh no, we’re starting off somewhere else…the day when we repeated Episode 6: Boast busters… and it was in the morning…

(Add intro here; Add where Knight talks about the bills and how he only gets 21 for being Stalia’s libarian)

My Little Pony: ([Strike Through] Friendship Is Magic): Universal Magic: Episode 10: The Magnificent Douchebag:

(Add where Knight and Wolf are smoking weed and chilling, and then a knock is on the door which makes Wolf jump u and try to hide the weed from the “cops”)

Just to also let you know, that I have been smoking weed a lot, and it’s not for comedic proposes, but it is somewhat is relaxing. It really takes the edge off sometimes, that and I feel like I’m rebelling against the system you know? I know by this point it doesn’t matter in my life, but eh, makes me feel like I’m still a teen back on earth. It makes me feel cool and that I’m hanging out with the cool kid that my parents and teachers tell me that is a bad influence on me, that bad influence being Wolf. And let me tell ya, he is a bad influence indeed. I mean I wouldn’t listen to the wooden fuck if he told me to jump off a bridge, but I’ll would probably end up, I don’t know, staying up pass curfew if it came to that situation.

Yeah, take that society, thinking you can tell me what to do and when to o to bed. Fuck you! I’ll go to bed when I want to go to bed. I AM YOUNG AS THE NIGHT BABY! Sorry, I think I had a little too much to drink last night. Celestia wouldn’t let me have any alcohol so I had to go to rubbing alcohol. I know it isn’t much and you can barely get a buzz on, it does the trick. And the best part, Celestia doesn’t know. Although she is going to get suspicious about where the alcohol is going to so I’ll have to find an alternative soon.

(Add continuation from intro here that leads to the two colts)

Well, all of a sudden, two colts, or I believe the correct term is colt. I don’t know. Two small boy children. Whatever. Two colts came up to my door, and told me to come and see the magnificent Harry.

I’m not kidding. That’s the Trixie pony for me. His name is fucking Harry. Of course, that sounds like Harry Potter, since he’s a unicorn and all.

There’s just one problem though. He’s not British. I mean, I always joked back on earth, that all British people are all wizards and go to Hogwarts. I also joked that Rarity had a British voice accent a little, and I just said she was a wizard. I even gave her a somewhat funny back story. She was once owned by harry Potter.

I also had one for Fluttershy as well.

The thing is with this one, is that the reason she is shy and is because she is trying to forget painful memories that she had when she was in the Vietnam War. Don’t ask where that came from. Although it doesn’t really compare to a hambone skeleton in a wheelchair that was also in Vietnam. Which reminds me… of something…that I probably shouldn’t mention right now…

(Add introduction to Harry and crowd here)

Anyways, I got the two colts names, and they were dog and tales. That seemed to make sense. It really does if you think about snips and snails.

Well, I went to the crowd, and all my friends were there, trying to be better then Harry.

In addition, I still find the name Harry for him doesn’t fit him. From now on for the story, and this is still what I call him to this day, the magnificent Douchebag. Alternatively, just Douchebag for short.

Well, Douchebag was just like Trixie, an arrogant fool.

He was also were beating my friends in their skills that they had. He then saw me, and challenged me.

(Add details about his friends here)

I then said fuck off, and out of nowhere, a mare comes in, that wasn’t even from this town. In fact, she had an 80’s look. The mare went up to Doucebag and said I wasn’t cool anymore and I lost the skill of magic.

(Add details to the 80’s joke)

I then said, “Who the fuck are you?”

Doucebag also said how I wasn’t great and magnificent like him.

Then another mare and a stallion came up beside me, and told Doucebag to leave me alone. Doucebag then said, that he will leave this town and me alone, if I challenged him to a magic contest.

The stallion then said that I would defeat him in that challenge.

I then said, “who are you ponies!? Where the fuck did you come from!?” then everybody just left.

I was told by Forest to come back in three hours.

Then wolf said to me that I knew what to do. He was right. I knew what I needed to do in this situation. And that’s by doing an 80’s movie training montage.

(Add training scene where Knight is training inside his home while Wolf lounges around and add “original” 80’s training montage song here with lyrics. And then part way, Knight asks if he is any stronger and then Wolf just points out he has only improved his muscles, not his mind / magic abilities. Knight says he doesn't know what to do and Wolf suggests some Zen stuff or something. So Knight goes into his mind, he is on a tall, snowy mountain and meets one of his inner selfs, and starts to "fly" and mentally train himself... for a short period of time... and when the training ends, everything moves backwards.)

While I was training, I also cast a spell, where music will play in the background while doing specific things. I basically had she’s a maniac, the power of love, back in time, no easy way out, best of the best, mighty wings, burning heart, push it to the limit, the workout theme from Rocky 4, you’re the best around, hearts on fire, and we fight for love.

Yea, those a list of the songs from the 80’s that I listened to.

(Add part where this part down below is all in his mind…)

While that was going on, I ran up a snow covered mountain, did exercises physically, and with my magic, punched a punching bag for a while, and did other training exercises from Rocky 4.

After that was over, it was time to face Doucebag. Well, I saw him, and that mare chick who said I wasn’t good anymore was there, giving Doucebag a boner.

Well, we then started the competition, and I kicked his ass real easy.

As I said, I write my own magic very easily. In fact, that’s what I did to the completion. Most of them were just for shits and giggles, but some were pretty impressive. Not even Celestia and Luna can’t do.

By the way, since I was a human before, and if you’re wondering how do I, a regular unicorn, have more power than a god like being? Well, I wondered about that too. And uhh, short answer is that’s a story for another time.

Anyway, one of the spells that I used, that I wrote myself, was to turn off gravity. Another one that I had was a spell that made a big flat long metal thing that covers over a city.

(Add details here about the fight)

It’s mostly goes along with the gravity spell.

I also have another spell that goes along with the metal top one.

It’s just basically a reference.

(Add detail about how they both tie but Knight somewhat barely comes out on top?)

All the spell does is give you a device, that has several buttons on it. Well what happens is, you press one of the buttons in a certain order, and its makes music. Then the big metal top responds with a deeper tone to the notes. If you haven’t guess by now, although, it was a shitty description of it. I was referencing the close encounters of the third kind movie. It’s when the humans were communicating with the mothership with the musical notes.

(Add details to the ending of the fight)

And that’s why you shouldn’t stick your dick into vodka after outing your ding a long into a woman’s crusty vagina or else you get the dick cheese. And if it burns, well that’s your fault, maybe you shouldn’t be banging every whore you see. The rule is you only bang the ones that have a tattoo because they think they are being bad ass that way and they are strong. I mean what?

Well, that’s how I defeated Douchebag. Nevertheless, of course, just like an angsty, edgy teen’s depression it was far from over. In fact, it couldn’t be more than 9/11. In the end, Harry was only more or less pissed that he ended up getting beat.

(Add detail here about how Harry makes the ultimate challenge about defeating an User Major and whoever does it first wins and is the better one. And add joke where Knight says he doesn’t care but the universe forces him to do it anyways.)

I fucking knew it. Wolf and I even betted on it, which means I fucking win, and he would owe me 20 bits.

So anyway, the strange mare chick still stuck with him, while the other two from before came up to me and said don’t worry about Douchebag and they will find a way to get him out of town. Of course, I thought, maybe they would try to prank him out of town, but I don’t know… something 80’s I guess. So, I also said to them, “Who are you ponies!? I don’t even fucking know you!”

(Add detail about how Harry talks to Dog and Tails about finding an Uder Major and telling him about it when he does)

(Add detail where Knight is looking in his libaray, trying to find info on n User Major, Wolf asks how he doesn’t know since he was a Brony, but he doesn’t. And he needs to know to defeat one and where to find one and blah blah blah)

(Add detail where Knight goes to Arrell since he is the animal expert. But find out he doesn’t know as much since he sort of making abominations against nature. But he tells Knight what he knows, and Knight tells Arrell he’s a scuffed Fluttershy. He claims to be better than him and tries to prove that he is in the right to show how he is more important than Fluttershy by going along wih him show him an User Major)

(Add detail where they go hunting in the everfree, they find one in a cave, and they make a plan. Arrells plan is overly complicated and stupid but think it should be held in high regards. It involves with him and rope and jumping off a tree. He falls off with AssHat and hangs upside down)

(Add detail where Knight thinks that was stupid and just walks into the cave, winging it. He does and finds that the User Major is a male and lives alone. He asks where the Minor is and he tells him while drinking a cup of coffee ina calm town how his wife left and took the kid. So he’s been living on the other side of the Everfree ever since. And that he also knows Harry and how he is a douchebag and owes him 20 bits. Knight asks what he is going tod with money, but then the conversation turns into a heated one and then the Major is pissed that his wife took his kid and wants to see her as he runs rampaent through Stalia.)

Well, later that night, Douchebag was in his trailer, while dog and tales were outside his home. They were two retards and thought maybe they could boost his popularity, by bringing an User Major and I mean an USER MAJOR to town, so Douchebag could defeat the major with his magic.

(Add somewhere Dog and tails is related to Ateir Heartess, just a hint…)

Well, those two idiots did just that, and Stalia was in a panic.

(Add detail where Knight makes it back to Stalia.)

Anyway, I then saw Doucebag trying to use his magic, but he was nervous, because he didn’t know how to defeat an user major, because he said he did know how.

(Add details where the Major is destroying stuff like an old folks home where a couple is looking at the stars and the moon and saying how old threy are and how beautiful life is…before Major crushes them and kills them brutally. And so on and so on.)

(Add detail where Harry attempts to defeat the Major, but the Major remembers him and is pissed and just fucks him up.)

(Add where Knight tries to think of a way of taking care of the Major.)

(Add where the other three guys, because Neon is doing something else, where Mac tells Knight to use his magical spells to get rid of the Major. But Knight says he doesn’t know how, he doesn’t have a fuck off spell. What does he look like, a wingless purple bundle of sticks?)

(Add where the everfree police then show up (and sort of become the Dues Ex Machnia I suppose) where it’s a few ghostly spirits of the past or something and, almost anthropormothic but not quite and put both Major and Harry under arrest. The police also taser the Major, and they arrest Major for not paying his due child support and not showing up to Everfree Court along with other charges. And Harry for doing something illegal inside the forest. And both get hauled off to Everfree Prison)

(Add detail where the Everfree Police talk to Knight and the three other guys for a bit)

(Add detail where Knight lazily writes a letter to Celestia that just ends up ebing changed by The Universe in the end)

Well, Doucebag then left in embarrassment and fled Stalia. Then the chick that was with him, came up to me, and said she was sorry she ever doubted me, and the other ones from before said how great I did and I was the best. In addition, while they were saying that, some victory 80’s music was playing in the background.

I was surprised no one noticed.

I also said, “You know what, I just give up. I just don’t understand where the fuck you ponies came from, but I just give up.”

(End it here with a thing to tie up the whole 80’s pony joke thingy)

Therefore, I then headed back to my house, and waited for episode 7 to come.

In addition, those guys never returned.

I did the right thing for giving up on it, because I think it was the universe getting back at me from trying to resist repeating history.

In addition, if you all wondered what Doucebag looked like, he was the same color as Trixie, but the mane was black, and was a male, of course.(Add detail towards the top…)