Chapter Four Part 7 Up! (Feb 9th) · 9:13am Feb 9th, 2021
So, our first trial part is up for this chapter! This is a two part trial only, so don't worry: you will get full resolution next part.
Also, I would like to thank Rainstorm Riddles a whole heap, as she's become a beta reader for me. With her help I've been getting a second eye view on the material yet to come, and it's definitely helped improve a couple of parts here and there, as well as catch a few silly mistakes on my part that might've slipped through to publishing otherwise.
There are also a couple of things I need to say about this part.
First, we handle Scootaloo's profile issue in this part. I'm going to be honest with you: my original plans called for Scootaloo's death by this point. The original crime for Chapter Four was planned to be Fluttershy killing Scootaloo, with Rainbow Dash's help. Now, that plan was scrapped once I neared the end of Chapter Two and realized how much I'd have to reorganize the story. But in the process, I overlooked her profile issue. This was a genuine, one hundred percent mistake on the part of the author. I know people were talking about it in the comments of the third chapter the whole way through, but although I wanted to, there was never a place I could find to insert addressing it in there. It would have disrupted pacing too much, and there was very little reason to suspect Scootaloo of doing anything in that chapter anyway, so I didn't think it would harm the story much to leave it. I'd failed to stop and think about what to do about the profile issue until it was a chapter too late.
So I used this as a story opportunity, and called myself out on it via Monoponi shouting at them. I'm not above using mistakes as an opportunity to better a story. A story problem is just an opportunity you haven't figured out how to use yet.
Second, the issue of the ice skates. As Trixie points out in the part, the ice skates could have been laid down on their sides. However, a couple of readers also pointed out in comments on the investigation that there isn't as much room as I thought there was in a go-kart, and the design of most go-karts wouldn't allow you to set anything under your legs anyway, because it'd fall through the frame. I learned this through a google image search, something I should have done before writing this chapter. This is another mistake on the part of your author, because I haven't been in a go-kart in years, and my mental picture of a go-kart, it turns out, is wrong. In my head I conflated go-karts with bumper cars, at least partially because back in the planning stages at one point the go-kart race track was bumper cars. And a bumper car has a much more sealed environment, with more room in the vehicle, enough to lay skates down. So I take the blame for this one, and will have to claim artistic license. I should have done my research. My apologies.
Chapter Six progress, meanwhile, is a bit slow, but it is on-going. It's a careful process, weaving together all the details.
Next part will post Saturday, unless I manage to finish another part to Chapter Six before then, in which case it will post Thursday. So, uh... hope I'm prolific?
Huh, at this rate, I'll have a full new case to read as a reward for finishing my HW corrections (due friday) or midterm (due Tuesday), so... yay!
Can't wait, as always.
I'm glad the plan for Ch. 4 changed over time. I just can't imagine Fluttershy killing anyone. Still, I hope that Scootaloo's talent is discovered eventually, hopefully without any more bodies dropping.