It's been some time since you last had your chambers cleaned. Luckily for you, the maid is all too willing to take care of everything tonight.

Just in case it isn't already painfully obvious, this is a parody/spoof of the book, The Lusty Argonian Maid which can be found in various Elder Scrolls video games.

New, unique chapters will be added overtime, but let it be known that Act IV, Scene III, and Act VII, Scene II are the ones that actually follow the books found within the various Elder Scrolls video games.

You wake up in a land where magic is real and sapient ponies have built a civilisation. Being from a different universe, you have no understanding of their language or laws, but you're happy to have found yourself in the friendliest town there is. Good luck building a new life as their favourite... monkey thing.

Dating can be rough. Especially if you're a lonely human in the magical pony land of Equestria. But you've got to date. It's only human nature to want a mate, right?

The only difference is, you're a celebrity in Equestria. Everypony knows who you are. So who's fit for you? One of the Mane 6, it seems, would be the best choice. You always felt that the Elements of Harmony had the popularity and personalities to match your own. However, which one was best?

Dating each will answer that question!

Currently in the process of being edited. Featured on FiMFic sometime.

This story is a sequel to Anon Buys the Everfree Forest

Anon is here and still very much on his bullshit. While he now has the run of his expansive property, not only does he have to assure his sovereign soil receives proper international recognition, he now has a flock of citizens seeking his guidance, expertise, and wisdom.

Ah well, one out of three isn't so bad, right?

Art is once again by me, lol.

Although your new life might be as close to perfect as it could possibly get, doubts begin to surface in your mind as to why you have been treated so kindly. Why have you been accepted? Fed? Clothed? Housed? Why have any of these things occurred when you have done nothing to deserve them?

A certain Princess of the Sun provides the answer.

EDIT 11/21/2019: Now with an audio reading by StraightToThePointStudio! https://youtu.be/-K0XO7HUVNg

You love a certain white unicorn and she loves you, but why does it scare you so much to commit? You've done everything together, so why is it so hard to think about marrying her? It's not like you don't want to, but just the thought is enough to send you into a panic attack. Will Rarity be able to help you overcome? Or will everything just... Fall apart?

This is one of the works I've been commissioned to do by a certain fan who wanted to see a sequel to my previous story "Freudian Slip". In this story, there's going to be twists, turns, shockers, and show stoppers. Just wait and see and prepare yourself to laugh, be afraid, cry, and d'awww. This is going to be 10 chapters long, 6000 words each. I'll try to update it regularly with the rest of my work, but things have been pretty erratic lately. Wish me luck!

You've found yourself in a rather awkward predicament with the Dazzlings. Will you be able to evade them, or will they find out that you're not from this world?

Sequel here: Not A Trick?

You are the Dragon King! For thousands of years you have lived as the top predator in the land, doing what you please, killing anything that gets in your way, or just any one you felt like killing.
When no one was left to challenge your might you sought out the greatest powers in he land; The Alicorn Sisters.
After a heated battle they did the unthinkable; they beat you. As your life trickled away however, you found it was not the end.
You awaken 1,500 years later, your memories intact. Your once glorious body, replaced with something... smaller.

2/6/2016

12/14/2016

FEATURED!!! Thanks everyone!

New cover by Mix-up

You and your marefriend snuggle on the couch and watch the clouds roll over the countryside from the comfort of your home.

After undergoing a life-saving surgery at the Ponyville Hospital, you end up in Fluttershy's care as you take the time to recover and regain your strength.

Cover art by hioshiru!

EDIT: Featured on 5/10/2023!