Despite being her unofficial sister, Rainbow Dash has yet to meet Scootaloo's parents. This changes when the young pegasus has something to show them and Rainbow tags along for the ride.
Chapters (10)
- Member Since 23rd Jul, 2012
- offline last seen April 29th
Bud Grazer
The beauty of thought. The infinity there. Nowhere is as near as I to anywhere. Everywhere is the same from some point in thought and the same point is in some thought from everywhere. ~ Sun Ra
Bud Grazer
Joined 23rd Jul, 2012 ·
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Pretty good though I get kind of tired of the constant jabs at Detroit. I live in a suburb of it and I get pretty tired of hearing how run down it is. I remain hopefull that the Emergency Finacial Manager can tunr things around considering City Council has done everything except cut their own salaries.
Very well done. I like this novel approach to Scootaloo's family and origins.
great work! i appreciate it even more for the whole "not native" thing! keep going!
Oh my...
Great story
2765440 Eh, what can you do. It's not like you're the author and can change it.
2765460>>2765472>>2765693
Thank you very much
2765440
Sorry about that, I honestly don't know anything about Detroit except for its wikipedia page. I picked it mostly at random since it apparently has a pretty bad crime rate and an easily ponyfiable name. If it bothers you, read "Las Pegasus" instead.
Me like..,
Question concerning the fight with Scootaloo's mom: Isn't Rainbow Dash a black belt in some form of martial arts? At least, she was seen wearing a black belt when teaching Apple Bloom karate in "Call of the Cutie".
I have but one thing, and ONLY one thing to say...
FUCK. YES. Very well done and DAMN deserving of it's place in the feature box.
Any chance we can see the boxing match?
~Skeeter The Lurker
Um, Rainbow is a black belt, just saying.
2766055 , 2766124
The only real qualification to be a black belt is owning a black belt; there's no real regulation, so anyone with enough cash can call themselves a black belt and open a studio.
The story, overall? Beyond excellent. I am happy.
Hey dude? Why do you put a space before your question marks and exclamation points?
2766124 Then if Scoots' mom is an equally skilled boxer they're about even. Most martial artists are taught to avoid hits. Boxers spend about as much time toughening up to TAKE them.
Edit: This is what I get for not reading the whole story before I comment. Yeah, Dash really should be familiar with how a boxer fights if she's gotten formal combat training. At least she should get it conceptually if she's not familiar with the forms.
Awesome read, but I wanted to read about the fight! Hehe, still great.
2766159
Yeah, but is that something Rainbow Dash would do? The point I was making is that Rainbow probably would not try to use a boxing stance when getting into a fight; she would go into the stance for whatever martial art she knows. Also, she should have mentioned her training to Scoot's dad. Aside from that small issue, the story was great.
Interesting take on Scoots' family. Definitely gets a green thumb!
2766214
I feel confident that her black belt is in Rainbow Dash. Or possibly in Being Awesome.
...
Hm. Do you suppose Dash went to Crazy Go Nuts University?
2766233
For someone like Rainbow Dash, learning a martial art would be a good way to build up strength and raise agility. Also, I am pretty sure that Dash understands that there is no point to an award that isn't earned.
Also, if she did go there, all of her friends would probably be pretty impressed by the diploma on her wall.
2765833 Well pretty much any downtown area has high crime. Detroit just happens to get more publicity because it's in a location that no one moves to unlike L.A.
Thanks for the praise, people !
2766055
That... was a changeling ?
Okay I completely forgot about the 5 seconds she's seen with a black belt... Pretend that never happened and I will try to write that fight. Deal ?
2766160
Because I'm used to it. Like I said, I'm not a native english speaker so I'm used to a different typography.
2765833 Ok, so this is a great story, but it says "complete" on the main page, but you've left the sort of ending i would expect for if it is multiple chapters. If it is just one chapter, then you may want a more closed up and finalized ending. If it is multiple chapters, then you need to change it to incomplete. Personally, I think that this was brilliant. Not one of those cliché Scootaloo sob stories and not one that overplays on the pity. Basically, I loved! And I think it would be great if you did more.
2766291 ... What language puts a space before some punctuation but not others?
2766252
You mean this diploma?
img.photobucket.com/albums/v295/shadowslayer/Humor/raindow-dash-diploma.png
2766327 Seconded! What goes on with RD and Scoot's visit to Rainbow's father?! I'd love to hear more!
(65th like/thumb-up, by the way.)
2766124
Rainbow is a black belt in KARATE. This is going to be a BOXING match.
Now, if it was say Ultimate Cage Fighting, I would understand. UCF is no-holds-barred. But it's not, it's a legitimate boxing match. Only boxing techniques are allowed.
Anyway, I don't hold this against you. Lots of people don't realise that you can't use stuff like Karate it a boxing match. Even I didn't until a few weeks ago. I took a guy out, thought I won, then was disqualified for using a Karate Kata.
Meh, waddya gonna do?
2766451
I know that the karate wouldn't help in the actual match, but when Dash was getting ready to just fight against Matchstick, rules go out the window.
Very cool story. I really hope for some more in this particular universe. Like introducing Scoots to Rainbow's family and when Red gets out. Plus more of Rainbow and Matchstick getting to know each other.
2766465
Huh. Forgot about that part.
Well, ugh, I guess Dashie coulda kicked Matchstick's ass?
2766291 Mind Blown.
I hate to sound rude but this was one of the best Scootaloo parents story I've read.
My hats off to you.
This is the 2nd best but that one was more of a comedy.
But if I had to separate serious one and the comedic ones the yours would be number 1.
I could not detect your ascent the first time around, if you didn't say something I might not have noticed.
I'm a language student myself.
I still have a lot to learn too when it comes to writing so all I can say is I am glad you liked writing it, that is impotent you got to love your writing.
Thank you for writing this piece
and I wish you the best of luck in the future.
Somehow this got featured ?
Really didn't expect that, so thanks again everypony !
2766327
I wanted to do something that was neither depressing or 'sunshine and lollipops', just like life is after all. Glad to see that worked.
Now, I didn't select 'complete' by mistake, I just like open endings like this. Besides, how do you write a definitive ending to a slice of life story ? Write until the characters all die ?
I really have no plan to write a continuation right now. Maybe I'll get ideas some day, but don't get your hopes up. I may still write that boxing match, but a complete story ? That's something else.
2766357
Try to guess
If the only think that looks un-english in my writing is the punctuation then I'm happy.
Because Witness Protection is for pussies!
An absolutely fantastic read! I would have never guessed that English wasn't your native language. Will there be a sequel to this story?
that was nice. I really enjoyed reading this
The odd thing is that Red just made a good impression on just about the only pony that could make a difference with him getting out and seeing his family.
A few good words with Celestia could make his next parole hearing go a lot smoother.
Even if she wouldn't, the way parole hearings work, having the element of loyalty speak up for you during it would be huge.
All I can think is I wonder what Good Behaviour + the help of an Element of Harmony bearer who has saved Equestria twice, and helped save another kingdom also, could do, for a guarded day release?
this story needs to be continued.
Very well done, you should be commended by many.
However, I can't tell if these are ponies or people. You seem to know quite a bit about how the prison system works in terms of visitation. Or perhaps I'm a bit niave on the whole thing. Either way, this all leaves a particularly human ache in my stomach, and I'm not sure how to deal with it. There's a grey space that I'm feeling.
It all feels very real. Too real. Well done in the writing, but I'm not sure what to take from this. Perhaps it was too strong for me.
Edit: I've written a blog about this. Maybe a few more readers will come admire your very real talent.
I rather enjoyed it. Gold Star from me. 2767700 The feeling real part just felt good to me... I like it when the story makes it feel like I could of been in the room. Know what I mean?
bf2142.free-gfx.com/bf2142_awards/medals_bf2142/medal_big_05.png
great story!!
hope my first story is as good as yours!!
2767298 Maybe after they have a few more conversations; I can't see Dash speaking up for somepony she only met once in that context.
Excellent story, and no I have no clue what your native language is. I'm going to guess Hebrew, though. Because non-latinate typography suggests a non-latin alphabet.
I gotta say, one of the best Scootaloo's Family fic I ever read
Wow nice one shot! That was a very good story and I like Scootaloo's parents as well. Even though her mom has an anger problem that would almost rival Raindrops, she is still an interesting character. I guess I like the idea that she at least has parents.
2765440 I don't think anything short of Robocop could help Detroit.
I'm sorry but I'm confused rainbow still has to fight Scoot's mom and you have the story as complete is it over?
This was a good story. I wouldn't have had any clue english wasn't your first language.
I would say it's a delightful read but it doesn't do this story justice. I've been linked here by Aegis Shield through his blog. It's simple and yet complex. If it weren't for the fact that I'm reading a story about ponies,I thought I was reading an excerpt from a person's life. So cheers for a great read. A definite favorite
2768064 You might be right unfortunately. Regardless Detroit will probably never fully return to it's glory days.
Dude you are phenomenal
I really enjoyed this story! It was a great read. You did a great job with... everything really. The grammar was nearly dead on; I didn't notice a single mistake (I only say nearly, because with twelve thousand words, there's probably something SOMEWHERE in there). Keep up the good work! A favorite from me
2768127 im from Lansing m.i. nothing short of a nuke could help Detroit.