Off Course

by Bottled Tension

Getting Scurvy

Off Course

Pinkie Pie sat at the front counter of Sugarcube Corner, surrounded by a colossal stack of ancient books and albums. The pink party pony was at the moment looking through a dusty brown scrapbook, her snout deeply embedded into the pages, making her oblivious to the ever growing line of angry ponies waiting to have their orders taken.

“What the hay is goin’ on around here?!” a certain honest country pony shouted from the back. “I ain’t got all day just to pick up some cupcakes!”

Pinkie instantly gazed up from her tome, the harsh tones of one of her best friends reminding her of her OTHER job. Extending her arm to an impossible length, she soon pushed every scroll and novel to the other room.

“Oh, I’m super-duper trouper sorry everypony, I won’t let it happen again, Pinkie promise! I’ve just been really busy lately with some future pla…”

“Just get me my croissants!” the first pony in line exploded. “I’ve been waiting in this line for two hours…I’m going to go insane!”

“Oh, I know what it’s like to go insane…” Pinkie whispered.

Soon, everypony was given their sweets, and the line dissipated. Applejack was last, and wanted to know what was going on with her favorite Pink Pal.

“What were ya doin’, Pinkie? I don’t usually see your head buried in books. Somethin’ botherin’ ya sugarcube?” she asked as she took her rainbow frosted cupcakes. However, when she looked up, her friend was nowhere to be seen. “I’ll just ask her at the pony pet playdate later today…” she sighed.

Later that day, in the Ponyville Park, all of the mane 6 had gathered for their weekly pet get together. As usual, Angel was abusing Fluttershy, Rarity was grooming Opalescence, Twilight was analyzing Owlowicious’s bone structure, and Rainbow Dash was trying to fix Tank’s helicopter pack. However, Pinkie and Gummy were nowhere to be found. Applejack was a little worried though, of all of her friends she hadn’t expected Pinkie to be late to any party related event. She thought it may have had to do with what happened at Sugarcube Corner earlier that day.

“Have any of ya’ll seen Pinkie yet? When I saw her today, she was acting weirder than a rattlesnake at a triathlon! She wasn’t focused at all, and she was readin’ all these giant books!”

“So what?” Rainbow Dash replied as Tank began to rise up, “She’s Pinkie Pie, she’s always acting weird and random. She’ll probably come any moment, she was probably polishing her party cannon or flossing Gummy or something like that.”

“What’s so wrong with reading books? Books are the most amazing things you can bury yourself into! Why, once I went a whole week just reading the entire history of Equestria, it was so interesting, especially the Griffin Wars! The sea battles they had there would go on for weeks, sometimes even months, oh and don’t even get me started on…” Princess Twilight had gone into one of her book tangents, and there was no stopping her. Everyone began to sigh, until Applejack felt a drip of liquid come out of a tree.

“What in tarnation…?” Pinkie Pie was laying on a branch of a tree, hidden from everypony, books still surrounding her as she laid, and her head resting on a large atlas. Pinkie was fast asleep, and she had made a trickle of drool flow down the tree branch. “Oh, there you are Pinkie. What was goin’ on this morning, and why are you still surrounded by books?”

“Oh my gosh, oh my gosh oh my gosh oh my gosh!” Twilight began to shout as she teleported to Pinkie’s side. “My atlas! Pinkie, you got drool all over this! Do you realize how much it costs to get a Royal Equestrian Atlas nowadays? I may be a princess, but I sure am no Fancy Pants!”

Pinkie’s eyes immediately fluttered open, and she jumped.

“Oh I am soooo sorry Twilight, I just haven’t slept for days, and I couldn’t control myself.” She was beginning to sniffle, and soon tears escaped from her eyes like fire hydrants.

“NO! You’re going to get all of these books wet!” Twilight screamed as she teleported all the books away and Pinkie to the grass.

Rarity stopped braiding Opalescence’s fur and walked up to Pinkie. “Even though they say curiosity killed the cat,” Opal meowed at her. “…I suppose Applejack’s curiosity is contagious. What were you doing up there Pinkie?”

“Well, I’ve been looking for some family to visit for a month.” Pinkie admitted.

“What? Pinkie, why are you leaving?” Fluttershy asked, swatting Angel aside from her mane.

“Well, you guys know how the cakes are going to Fillydelphia this month? Well, after that whole baked-bads incident a while back, they’re still worried about how I’d manage the bakery while they’re gone, so they’re closing it down until they get back.”

“Well, you don’t have to leave, sugar cube,” Applejack responded. “I mean, you can still rent your apartment upstairs while they’re gone. You don’t need to find somewhere else to live.”

“I know that, but without the Cakes, it would be so boring to be alone for a wholesale month. I’d go super loco in the coco!” Pinkie’s eyes rolled around and around before she fell to the floor. “Anyway, I want to try a new mini apprenticeship, have a little change of scenery! Imagine, I could be baking and/or partying on the moon,” Pinkie jumped, and she slowly fell back down, “Oh, or maybe, I could be the apprentice of a famous sailor-mouthed chef!” Pinkie took out two knives and started grinding them together.

“I doubt you’ll find any opportunities like that.” Rainbow Dash whispered.

“That’s exactly what I’m saying Dashie!” Pinkie came out from behind her Pegasus pal. “My family has been rock farmers ever since the dawn of time, and not a single family member so far has given me anything to offer!”

Applejack had been thinking, when suddenly, a light bulb lit up in her head. “Well, I can’t offer you a job on the moon or a job on Tartarus’ Kitchen, but I just so happen to know someone who may take you under his hoof!”

Pinkie’s neck stretched all the way to Applejacks face. “Oooh, who?”

“Prepare yourself Pinkie, I’m gettin’ you a job on the Harmony’s Heave!”

All the other ponies looked at Applejack with confusion. Applejack continued,

“A royal Equestrian fleet ship, manned by my Aunt Orange’s brother, Scurvy!”

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"Hey Twilight, welcome back!" Spike greeted to the six mares walking in the library. "I didn't think you'd...!" Suddenly, he burped a letter from Princess Celestia out of his signature green fire, into the purple alicorn’s face.

My dearest Twilight,

I have been flooded with requests from all over Equestria for the presence of their newest princess, and of course, the ponies that made her ascension possible. Manehattan will be hosting an elite exhibition gala in two weeks, and the citizens have been begging to see all of you. I will also be attending, as well as Princess Luna, Cadence, and Shining Armor. Enclosed is a page in which you may write who is going with you. We won’t be having ticket troubles again. Feel free to bring as many ponies as you wish. I will see you soon.

With fondest regards,

Princess Celestia

“Girls, I guess we’re going to Manehattan.” Twilight monotonously said as she levitated the letter to the other side of the room. “Well Pinkie, I guess you can’t be a pirate pony, you have to come with us to the big city.”

Pinkie Pie had been wearing a pirate costume during the entire trip to Twilight's library after Applejack’s announcement, and she couldn’t help but sing pirate songs every other minute. As Pinkie heard Twilight, her eye-patch popped off and her hair began to deflate.

“But, but, I want to be a PIRATE PONY!” Pinkie began to cry.

“You can’t just refuse Princess Celestia, Pinkie, if she says we’re going, we have to go.”

Applejack interjected. “Now just wait a minute.” Pinkie’s hair began to inflate again. “Of course Pinkie can do both. Scurvy told me all about the ship’s journey at the last reunion, and it just so happens that Pinkie can do 'em together.” Applejack grabbed a map from the corner.

“Now look here, Scurvy told me that next week the ship will be starting its course in Baltimare, it’s docked right now at Horseshoe Bay. Scurvy told me the ship is mostly used for trading with Griffins, and that they’ll need to go to Manehattan for a few days for supplies and exports. I’d say that the ride would take 5 days tops, and Pinkie would be able to be at the gala early. Heck, we could even go with her. I’ve always wanted to see how it is on a ship.”

Fluttershy jumped into the conversation. “Oh, I’ve always wanted to commune with the creatures of the sea, it would be so amazing to meet so many types of creatures…I mean, if it’s okay with you, Pinkie, if I tag along.”

“Maybe we could rendezvous with Pinkie for a few days.” Rarity chimed in. “I’ve heard that the air and water is simply divine for the pores, and who knows, I may come up with some ideas for my fashion line. I can picture it now, Saltwater Styles! Or is that too tacky?”

“Out on the sea like that, I could practice some new moves I’ve been trying to practice.” Rainbow Dash spouted as she flew over the others. “I wouldn’t have weather duty getting in the way, and I also need to work on my swimming for the new Iron Pony Competition section next moon.” Rainbow swam through the air, when she hit a wall and Twilight became covered in texts.

“Well, as fun as all of that sounds,” Twilight muffled while trying to tunnel out of her own books, “It would be much more efficient for us to go directly on a train instead of a boat. After all Applejack, did you even ask your uncle if Pinkie could be his apprentice?”

“Well, no, I didn’t yet, but I'll bet my hat if he doesn't say yes. After all…” Applejack leaned in close to Twilight, “You bookworm types never get to study oceanography and all that stuff outside. Besides, this could be a good way for our new princess to get herself familiar with the whole foreign affair deal.”

Twilight gasped.

"Pinkie, we're going to get you aboard the Harmony's Heave!"

“Hooray! Boat Partaaaaaaaaaaaaaay!”

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“Package for Mr. Scurvy,” A grey pegasus swerved into a bar at Horseshoe Bay, where a dreadlocked pony lay asleep, salt surrounding his lips. The unnamed mailmare was pointed to Scurvy by the owner of the saloon, and while attempting to tap him awake, dropped the box on top of his head.

“Yarr, what ye be wantin’, lass?” The pony took a sword from his side and pointed it to the pegasus’ snout, where she began to have her eyes move in opposite directions of distress. “I could slice you up like a carrot. A grey, cute carrot.”

“Uh, I just have a package for you sir, direct from Ponyville. I didn’t mean any harm. I just don’t know what went wrong…”

“Ugh, it be fine. Just don’t be droppin’ any packages on salt-drunk ponies, it could get ye in a mess of trouble one of these days. Trust me, I’ve seen it all,” He sighed as he slid his blade back to his side. “Now, what be in this package anyway? It be as heavy as a bag O’bricks!” He carefully opened the box, when suddenly, explosions of confetti jumped out, accompanied by polka music and a cake.

“What the-”

A recording started to play from the cake, going as fast as lightning.

“Oh my gosh, Oh Mr. Scurvy, my name is Pinkie Pie and I’m friends with your niece Applejack, and I just heard you’re going on a super awesome Pirate ship and you’re gonna be fighting evil sea monsters and opening portals and going over the end of the Earth and having fun… and Partying! And-”

“Well howdy Uncle Scurvy, this is your niece Applejack, and my friends and I, Fluttershy, Rainbow Dash, Rarity, Princess Twilight Sparkle...” Scurvy could hear a voice groaning in the background, “...and especially Pinkie Pie, the mare you heard at the beginnin’, asking to join you on your trading excursion to Manehattan. We’d all be as pleased as plums if we could come aboard. Write back soon…”

“Say Yes! I’ll bring cupcakes!!”

“Hmmm, so my landlubber niece Applejack and her friends wants to join the crew, eh?” He asked to himself. “Better ask Avast about that...and I better stop talking to myself.”

Scurvy boarded one of the ships docked outside, and immediately knocked on the door of the Captain’s quarters, when the door magically opened.

“What is it, Scurvy?” the captain seemed annoyed with his lackey’s presence. Scurvy took the recording from his saddlebag and played it in front of his boss. “Hmmm. Yes, I suppose they can come,” A smile spreading on his face. “We could always use more ponies in the crew.”

Scurvy replied, “I’ll get to writing a response right away sir.” He took a quill and parchment from his cap. “I can’t wait to see my niece, and there was that one pony who sounded like she was eating too much sugar. I think I’d like her. And I’ve also never seen a real princess before.”

“Yes, I can’t wait to meet them as well.” Captain Avast responded with a smile on his face.

Author's Note:

Coolio! My first fanfic! I'll be adding more chapters soon, and quickly, hopefully. They'll all probably be longer than the first. Please leave comments below and tell me what I could do to become a better writer!