Shipping 💖11,678 stories ·9,746 members
The Fillyfoolers3,950 stories ·3,489 members
The Writers' Group56,503 stories ·9,301 members
One-Shots18,927 stories ·2,369 members
Sensual Fiction (SFG)1,192 stories ·1,724 members
Fluttershy4,017 stories ·2,923 members
Applejack and Fluttershy have been together for a while, and Applejack wants to take the next step.
When Fluttershy is hit by a case of the feather flu, however, Applejack will have to put everything on hold to care for her marefriend.
My entry to the Appleshy contest.
Enjoy.
Page generated in 0.37 seconds
Total duration
665 users online
1,118,484 hits today, 2,151,698 yesterday
My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
Designed and coded by knighty & Xaquseg - © 2011-2024
Support us
SubStar
Chat!
Discord
Follow us
Twitter
MLP: Friendship is Magic® - © 2024 Hasbro Inc.®
Fimfiction is in no way affiliated with or endorsed by Hasbro Inc.®
@Karrakaz...
1. No glaring/major technical writing errors? Check.
2. Hale & hearty word-count? Check.
3. Descriptive & detailed with writing out the scenes and emotions? Check.
A very strong entry. Even if you do not win, you still get to hold your head high with the work you have done with this fan-fiction.
Unique ship? Well you've just tickled my fancy.
Aww. This is a very sweet story. I am pleased.
Adorable,
.
This was such a great read and adorable beyond belief.
Very nice indeed. Though I did spot Twi having a case of Schrodinger's Wings.
I thoroughly enjoyed this story. AppleShy isn't the easiest of ships to find (at the very least, there aren't any notable that come to mind), and I'd say it's pretty high on my list for cutest pairing.
Thanks for writing.
3649770
Really? I thought I'd gotten rid of those pesky things.
3650385
Twi is an alicorn up until the sauna, then her wings fall off.
Oh hey, I haven't seen this ship yet.
To the read later list you go, for after work.
Aww, we never found out if Twi and Rares got together.
Nice and cute little story you got here. Take out the romance and you could probably pass it off for an actual episode. Definitely a nice change from all of the serious readings that I have done lately. So here, have a thumbs up.
Oh no...
There goes my heart.
My heart 'daawwspoded.
Sequel! I demand a sequel! I want the sequel to go deeper in the Rarlight thing too!
3650816 It's implied that they did with Twilight standing closer to Rarity near the end... though, she was also doing things like that earlier on... Well, I choose to believe that they did get together.
3652275 *waves* Hi, friend!
3652577 Hello! For such a huge site, you would think that you would rarely see people you've met before!
3652577 I choose to believe that too.
Honestly, this story was incredibly fluffy, but felt kind of unfocused. The bit with Rarity and Twilight in the spa didn't really seem to fit into the rest of the story, and the whole story just felt very long for what it was.
Was it cute? I suppose, but it left me feeling unsatisfied at the end, as the complete lack of any sort of conflict or... anything really just meant it was a bunch of characters putzing around. The dialogue was fine and the story was reasonably written, but I just didn't feel enthralled by it.
Is cute, which I always appreciate, but needs a bit of polish to really get the shine out.
You're over-using words a bit too often, and the effect is jarring. 'Marefriend' in particular in the opening scene, along with names being repeated too often jolts me out of the story and makes my OCD twitch.
That would be she is is, so I think you only need one of those.
Anyway, very cute enjoyable story. Applejack and Fluttershy both seemed in characters, and the RariLight was nice too.
I think this story was exactly what it needed to be: a super-cute bit of warm fuzzies about family and ponies.
well done.
Why did I wait almost 3 days to read this?
(saving the warm fuzzies for a cold, snowing night, I'd wager)
True; heart-warming without being utterly saccharine (not that I mind sugar in my blood), and it feels real. Well, about as real as a romance between magical ponies (but I could substitute for "real" things and it would still be the same story).
Also, this...
...made me think this.
derpicdn.net/img/2012/8/11/71768/large.png
Ok, this was really perfect. The characters well worked, the whole situation also well worked... It's, no doubt, a very, very good story
3652275
I agree. I like to see a sequel
Yay for a story with my fav 2 ponies! it was excellent!
Great job with this story. Really liked seeing Fluttershy written fairly, meek and shy but not overbearingly so. It's a good balance that's not achieved all the time.
Not sure why you didn't use italics for Applejack's internal thoughts. Made it a little confusing to figure out when certain lines were supposed to be internal dialogue.
The presentation of the extension was a little underwhelming when they first saw it, but it picked up really well after they began to look at the interior. It somewhat reminded me of those Extreme Makeover shows when they show a family their new remodeled home for the first time.
Thanks for letting me enjoy a ship that I don't commonly see.
i14.photobucket.com/albums/a331/brittmcgee/MLP%20Minecraft/TLSOA_zps2aa17c49.png
What happened between Twilight and Rarity?! I want to know!
Good story.
Very cute and sweet
RariTwi? RARITWI? WHY THERE NOT MORE RARITWI?
Such a sugary sweet, warm-hearted story.
You can has review!