You can't

by TwiwnB

Epilogue: anti-moral of the day

Author's Note:

This epilogue can be seen as an extended ending. It isn't really part of the story, it was just something that I wanted to have written somewhere and that was supposed to be in the story when I conceived it. So you can see it as an extended ending, but not as "the" ending.

It's just that the moral of that ending is not really a good one... or maybe it is. I've actually got no idea.

The engine of the locomotive was holding, the speed was more than satisfactory, so Twilight began to relax and closed her eyes for a second.

“Alright Twilight!” said Rainbow Dash’s voice behind her back. "You see that you are very smart!"

“Yeah, we knew you could do it from the very beginning. And you who doubted yourself.” added Applejack.

“Seriously, dear, you made quite a lot of drama back there. I mean, relatively speaking, but still.” almost complained Rarity.

Hearing those voices, Twilight used her magic to stop the locomotive.

“What are you doing?” asked Applejack. “It’s time to go back.”

But Twilight didn’t make any gesture.

“Hum… Twi’? Time to go back? Shouldn’t you make the locomotive move?”

“No.” she replied. "Look, I know all you did was to help. But you better stop right now speaking about it."

Her friends looked at each other without understanding.

"You just don't want to admit you acted like a drama queen back there." affirmed Rainbow Dash.

“Care to repeat what you just said?” asked Twilight.

“What, the part about the fact we knew you were able to repair the train all along and that you shouldn’t have made so much drama about it and that it was just a piece of cake for that huge intellect of yours?” asked Pinkie Pie with a huge smile and a weird tone of complicity. “I’m not sure if I remember, but I can try if you want.”

“Get off.” replied Twilight.

“What?” asked Rainbow Dash. “Why?”

“Just get off my train.” Twilight answered. “Now.”

Her friends obeyed and went off the locomotive, wondering about what was going to happen. Only Pinkie Pie seemed not to care so much.

“What now?” asked Applejack. “Surely you aren’t going to leave us here all alone… How would we go back home?”

“Well, I’m sure that, for a strong pony like you Applejack, and a fast pony like you Rainbow Dash, and a creative pony like you Rarity, it will just be, how did you say already? A piece of cake?”

“But, Twilight…” tried to say Rainbow Dash, understanding that the alicorn was serious.

“Make your own train. Don’t worry, I believe in you.” replied Twilight. “And use the journey to learn your lesson!”

Then the alicorn, princess of Equestria, put a few logs in the furnace a let the locomotive retrieve all of her speed, leaving her friends away with a feeling of deep satisfaction.

And shame yes.

But mostly satisfaction.

As she knew her journey had taken a new turn and that everything was going to be fine. And she was feeling free, at last.

THE END

Comments

[TwiwnB]

4363126
Actually, I think the "open introduction" (where I pretty much don't explain anything), the picture I used, the fact the story still isn't very good and the mass of different chapters are the primary reasons.
I personnally like it, because it speaks to me, but I imagine that I'm blinded and that, in fact:
- the story is too obscure for the reader to identitfy with Twilight and/or understand what is going on
- the subject of the story is a little bit restrictive (and therefore only targets very few readers, as the others wouldn't "feel" or "understand" the problematic which they may have never encountered in that way)
- the style is quite poor (not much humor, lot of lost opportunities here and there...)
- also, the ending probably feels rushed... I tend to be very bad with endings.

If you have time, it would really help me if you could tell me if those hypotheses are right, because, at that point, I'm only guessing.

4363208
That is the sort of humor I wish I had put into the story instead of being so serious all the way. .

[ferret]

Was this like a metaphor for puberty or something......

[TwiwnB]

4483252
Sort of. The metaphor was (second degree reading):
- the track of the trains are the path we follow in life to make our journey through it
- the locomotive is the mean we need to successfully make our journey (from getting a diplom to getting a job...)
- Twilihgt's friends are the friends and family who show support but cannot help because they cannot do it for you
- Twilight's friends when they party are the people that have already succeeded (or seem to have succeeded) that we observe and sort of envy when we still haven't succeeded

for puberty

Puberty is having to "prove" ourselves as "adults". In that sense: maybe. It just wasn't directly my intention.

Finally, the whole story was just there for me to shout (to people who won't read it ) "Stop thinking and telling me that I'll succeed easily, because I can fail and I'm afraid to fail."
But that's more a "third degree" reading.

[ferret]

4484750

I like.

[TwiwnB]

4492449
I tend to forget how pleasant it is to hear such words. Thanks .