Gather 'round, children! It's time for kindly Uncle Nic-fit's story time! And he's drunk!
A series of one-shots, short stories, scenes, and super short stories conceived and written while drunk. Un-edited and not proof read or spell checked, so you get the story as it was written for the full experience.
Strap in, y'all!
NEW CHAPTER PROBABLY THE MORNING AFTER WHENEVER I'VE BEEN DRUNK!
THESE WILL PROBABLY BE REALLY REALLY AWFUL!
Teen because I have no idea what I'll write.
Might bump up to mature if it calls for it later.
I'm so, so sorry ~ Nic-fit
To quote someone quoting someone else:
Funny, but check your grammar for mistakes. If the stories were longer, it would be like a Movie 43 kind of thing!
The fact that you apologized in the description...
These stories are terrible...
I like them.
Also:
In case the clip didn't give it away: this is basically a Hungarian "peasant metal" song about drinking until you throw up, then drinking some more. A lighter version of "Blackout," I suppose...
Ooh, a rave. Wait let me just put on some Happy Mondays...
4957136
Well, I certainly can't fault that. Unless you're lying, for whatever reason.
4957326
I could check the grammar, but it would sorta defeat the point, what with wanting to keep them the same as when I wrote them.
Longer chapters may happen, depends how well writing holds my attention while drunk, this is an experiment at the moment
4957350
I stand by it wholeheartedly.
4957554
Its a whole new kind of awful!
Also:
>peasant metal
10/10 best new genre name.
4957686
Fuckin' get Bez in on this action!
4957963
It's a rough translation. The original word is also used to describe someone as "dumb." What are derogatory terms/slang for "person who works in agriculture" in English? (other than "peasant," of course )
Actually, I screwed up. The band calls itself "agricultural metal"
Also, the title means "atom-vomit"
Tis the fuzz! We must flee!
This is the kinda humor i love. keep at it mate. no matter how many people hate this... you will have me as a true fan!!!!
4958053
Well, in UK English, I don't think there is a derogatory term for farmer. In US English, maybe Hick or Yokel I guess.
4958160
Thanks, man! All I can say is I'm going out and getting pissed tonight, so expect more pretty soon!
4957963 ...God made it easy on me!
4958200 yokel metal, it's metal... With banjos.
4958298
4958392 now for your viewing enjoyment, gypsy punk music: http://youtu.be/um1dSSPzc1I
4958392 well, that might have been the coolest thing ever.
4958922
Gogol Bordello, fucking called it!
I love you.
4959652
Love you too, babe
4959014 heh, I love those guys. They're so awesome.
Ahahah. This was awesome.
4/20 I blazed it
4964108
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4964781
media.tumblr.com/bd6fa37fb972a9a053d6aceb564e1b19/tumblr_inline_mihr86bJud1qz4rgp.jpg
Wheeeeeeeeee!
4973695
Blimps, mothafucka!
Funny as always!
It's like offering tours of Chernobyl or Hisohima, I'd take one.
4988379
Thanks!
4989299
That is sort of a thing that happens though.
Did you know the other three reactors saw use right up to 1999?
4990113 huh. Also heh, so the princess is nuclear...
4990140
Well, what with the sun and all that.
Lots of fusion and fission happening there.
4990147 Does that mean she's technically full of gas?
4990373
And is also that you can't get within a 10 million Km distance of her, or you'll be vaporised.
It's pretty awkward, actually.
4991336 the sun is a mass of incandescent gas, a gigantic nuclear furnace...
Holy shit this is the best thing I've ever heard of
das some real 420 blaze it american dream shit right there
4996512
Haha, thanks!
4996546
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inb4 first
...
wait...
4997170
What if there was an invisible comment, tho
You almost spelled it right.
5000580
Sees the work killdozer, clicks so hard mouse breakes, now ufdseing tab to navigate
You my sir, are awsome.
5022565
What can I say, the movie, the band, and the actual Killdozer are hella neat
K.
that's how stripes work in racing, everybody knows this.
5033981
This is a fact.
Well, I do like The Eels...
Also, I've been reading these stories to my 10 year old little sister at bedtime. Aren't I a good rolemodel?
5097173
Haha, that's wonderful, glorious.
5097192 yeah, she thinks this is absolutely hillarious.
5097199
To be fair, eels are funny as fuck, I mean, just look at them.
5097225 She likes the band too, her favorite song of theirs is I Like Birds.