7. Operation Smile Vial Flask Task Potion Ocean
The
P. E. R.
Michelson and Morely
The Speed Of Right
By Chatoyance
OPERATION SEVEN: SMILE VIAL FLASK TASK POTION OCEAN
Grey Crusader laughed as he galloped, a special, evil, devious sort of laugh, the kind of laugh that supervillains are defined by, and mad scientists prefer nine to one. And the exception secretly envied the rest who could perform it.
He leapt out over the edge of the Tacksworn Corporation skyscraper, the distant street far below his unicorn body, the poisoned wind of the city streaming his white mane back over his flanks, his tail a comet of white silk behind him. Like all Equestrians, he was front-heavy, and his large skull angled over, dragging the rest of his weight into a plummet. Grey grinned at the onrushing street, the plasteel and crystalex of the building streaming by like a dark river.
He felt the touch of hooves on his shoulders, delicate and precise. Hushed Silence transferred her pegasus nature into the mass of the falling unicorn, and he became an extension of her, like a cart she might pull, or a chariot she might lift. The effort was all but thoughtless, instinctual, yet the result profound - Grey followed her arc upwards, falling no longer, his limbs splayed wide, his mad laugh become an uncharacteristic giggle, almost foal-like, almost innocent.
Grey and Silence rose above the buildings, cutting a lazy circle through the sky, searching. It was easy to become momentarily disoriented above the complicated mess that was a human city. Grey's sharp mind snapped to recognition, there, McKinley and Twenty-First... he motioned to Silence and tried to convey the location, but the wind was too loud.
Hushed Silence, wings spread wide nevertheless understood, she always understood, it was part of her specialty as one of the Nine. With a slight smirk she sharply jerked over into a twisting, G-loaded spiraling dive that left Grey shrieking with either horror or delight - and she knew from long experience that he would never reveal which it had been. Most likely both.
At the last moment, she reduced their speed and flared her pinions, bringing them to a butter-smooth landing on the wide ledge of what had once been the main offices of the Kahuna-Heisler corporation, back in the old pre-Collapse era. Grey pretended to stretch sore muscles, but he was really checking to make sure he hadn't wet himself. Not again. Never again.
Hushed Silence laughed softly to herself. She liked being able to occasionally catch the old bastard off guard. She walked to the edge of the building and looked down. It would start soon. The Final Battle.
"What the flying... muffin... are we doing here?" It wasn't so much a question as a complex cry of anquish, anger, confusion and astonishment. Nutmeg felt as if she had just been through the middle of a cyclone, and things were not merely moving too fast, they had reached escape velocity and entered hyperspace on route to Barnard's Star.
They had spent a single night in the Oklahoma City PER Enclave. The morning was a blur of food, secret schemes that entirely failed to stick in their memory, somehow agreeing to join in with... whatever was going on... and ending up in curiously loose and thin uniforms and nothing else. No weapons, no guns, not even a knife, and it was just now dawning on them that this really was supposed to be the Final Battle, in boldface capital letters, likely even italicized, between the Human Liberation Front and the Ponification for the Earth's Rebirth. "What The Muffin?" had entirely failed Nutmeg, and she felt compelled to use the very unpony-like "What The Fuck?" simply because nothing less could even hope to do.
There was never time for a single question, nor was there any hope of an answer even if the time had existed. They had both been swept along as if by a vast flood, only to be deposited on this street, at this time, next to this large cart full of stoppered flasks, vials, glass eggs and what appeared to be retrofitted, adapted super-soaker water guns, all filled to the brim with potion, and so hot with thaumatic radiation that Nutmeg already had small black spots on her hip where she had leaned on the edge of the cart. Nutmeg's head spun, and her hip, well, it kind of itched and burned.
"I hear both of you are just one point away from earning your hooves!" It was a red pegasus mare who looked just like the one on the posters they had seen in the barracks the night before. "STRAWBERRY JAM WANTS YOU!", and with the alluring pose and flagging tail, the innuendo offered an enticement to join the PER on multiple levels. "Just keep tossing, and I'm sure you'll be ponies before nightfall!" she winked at Nutmeg and Ginger, and went on her way, apparently to confer with another pony about a thing that needed to be done, somewhere.
Ginger shrugged his delicate shoulders. Somehow they had escaped a battlefield only to end up right in the middle of another. Nopony would tell them anything, but everypony seemed more than upbeat - they seemed almost jolly in fact, which made everything seem all the more surreal. Didn't they understand what battle meant? The HLF were not hoofing around, they had these nasty things called 'guns' and they made holes where holes shouldn't be. It was as if none of the ponies of the Oklahoma City PER understood any of this.
Some of them were even laughing! Oddly, they stopped the moment that Ginger or Nutmeg looked at them. Perhaps word had gotten out about what they had endured, and this sobered them. If so, then good, thought Ginger. Good.
Ginger looked at his partner in ponification. Nutmeg looked frightened and confused. What were they doing here? Risking their lives to finish off the dregs of the HLF because of some insane notion of honor? Yes, they had been useless, but the Squamous PER would have ended up... the way they did... whether they had been in that base or not. Gladiola could have gone alone and the result would have been exactly the same. They hadn't even made a decent diversion. Did they really owe Barnsour's memory anything in the end? Nothing about that battle would have changed one bit if they had never joined the Squamous PER.
One point. Why was that so important? Between them they had saved one hundred and ninety-eight lives, humans so foolish that they played football while the entire world was ending all around them. Hadn't they done enough? More than enough? Nutmeg could be killed in this battle. She had suffered enough, and truth be told, so had he. Ginger came to an uncomfortable decision. It bothered his deep sense of honor and duty... but it also served a higher calling too. They wanted to save others. Well, right now, Ginger wanted to save Nutmeg.
The answer was utterly simple. All they had to do was leave. They could go straight to the Bureau right now and... no. Nutmeg would put up a fight. She would argue him out of it, she would invoke honor and duty and he would end up agreeing with her. They reinforced each other that way, both so stubborn they kept the other from giving up.
They had a huge cart of potion right beside them. You can't talk while you're changing. It would be so easy. He could carry her away while she was transforming. Just pick her up while her body metamorphosed. It would feel a little icky, but... so what! Ginger picked up two flasks, one in each hand. Nutmeg had moved in front of him, her back was turned. Their uniforms were so loose and stretchy that there wouldn't even be the slightest worry over being restricted during Conversion.
Ginger raised the flask of purple serum he held in his right hand. All that would be required is one sharp smash - and at that very moment the sound of heavy boots stomping, growing louder and louder filled the street. From around the corner came dozens of camo-wearing shapes running towards them. Ginger got a glimpse of guns and caps and canteens and dark glasses as vials and bottles spun in lazy, long arcs over his head. The battle had begun, there was no way to escape as ponies crowded in close to grab with teeth and hornfield at the contents of the cart.
Everything became a loud, screaming blur. Nutmeg was still there, in front of Ginger, he could tell that, as the forces met. Ponies had darted ahead towards the humans, bucking and butting them over. The sound of shattering glass was everywhere, tinkling and smashing. Ponies ran around, seemingly in every direction - it was hard to tell what was going on. Ginger threw his flasks in the general direction of the humans, in the close crowding, it was hard to see if he had hit any target or merely thrown wild. Nutmeg was tossing potions now, grabbing from the cart with her left and tossing with her right like a machine.
The sound of gunfire startled Ginger. Why hadn't there been any before? Perhaps there had been, and he simply had been too overwhelmed to even acknowledge it. At the battle in Squamous, they had hidden behind a workbench. Ginger was astonished at how confusing being in the middle of a close-quarters fight really was. How could anypony even know what to do? In the end he decided that all there was to do was just keep throwing and hope for the best.
It seemed like an eternity, yet in real time it was apparently over fairly quickly. A familiar sound of squishy, blorpy, splurty sounds filled Ginger and Nutmeg's ears as the cries and screams calmed and faded. In front of them were several dozen rapidly Converting former humans. Somehow, one had gotten within mere feet of Nutmeg's position. He - or she, it was impossible to tell at the moment - burbled and writhed, pale as dough. "Did I do that?" Nutmeg's query sounded like a small child unsure if they had done wrong or right.
A bright, brash voice interrupted "Excellent throwing arm there! Oh, you got that one, and a few others I dare say! You did well too! Good girl!" The pale blue unicorn stallion was looking at Ginger when he said the last. Clearly the long platinum hair and delicate build had confused him. That happened fairly often to Ginger, and for some reason, it always made him smile.
They must have gotten their points. More than. Ginger beamed at Nutmeg, as they looked out over what must be three dozen former HLF, all squirming and burbling as the nanotechnomagical serum did its work. Some of them had colorful coats already, and Ginger noted bright manes and tails shooting out here and there among the piles of forming ponies.
Oddly, there was no blood, anywhere. Not a single pony body was on the ground that wasn't in the middle of the conversion process. There were no dead ponies. Not even a single injury. No... wait.... there was one of the PER, limping past, an earthpony mare, ivory with brown mane. "Heh... I stumbled and strained my cannon... derp!" The pony made an embarrassed silly-face and crossed her eyes briefly.
Ginger looked around. Not a single casualty beyond that. Nopony was hurt. This was more than a little... "GINGER! We did it! We WON!" Nutmeg was yelling and jumping up and down, her hands high in the air. Ginger looked down at the nearly complete former soldier at Nutmeg's feet. Nopony was rushing to cut the clothing off these soldiers. Ginger looked more carefully. The clothing the soldier was wearing was very loose and ill-fitting. The neck and arms were wide and soft and... stretchy. The fabric was not normal.
The former HLF were now beginning to sit up, giggling and laughing with joy. They looked silly draped in khaki and camouflage patterns. The patterns... the camo patterns... they weren't abstract shapes. Ginger had seen that pattern before. On the pants he had worn in Squamous. The shapes were olive, gray and brown pony silhouettes.
"Fantastic fucking job, you two magnificent bastards!" It was Grey Crusader. He had been literally dropped in by a pegasus mare who had apparently been... carrying him. "You've both more than made the grade! Congratulations!" The look on the gray stallion's muzzle, the look in his eye... Crusader was having a lot of fun with this. More fun than one would expect at the end of a battle.
Two ponies joined Crusader, one on each side. They held potion flasks in their mouths. "Guess what, kiddies? When I run the show, promises are kept. Punishments are swift, but rewards... AH! Rewards are even swifter. Gimmie that!" Grey snatched one of the potions from the pony on his right. In one incredibly smooth, practiced motion, he tossed the container. Ginger found he couldn't breath for a moment, the impact of the flask had briefly knocked the wind out of him. He managed to gasp, the air rushing back in, and looked down, his hand already going pale and numb where he had instinctively grabbed at the spreading, syrupy, bright red fluid that was melting his clothing and actively soaking into his suddenly pale chest and abdomen.
Ginger just barely saw Nutmeg go down, drenched in purple, before his vision failed, blackness enveloping the world. The laughing voice was unmistakably that of Grey Crusader.
Ginger had been sent to the principal's office. Again. It wasn't fair. It wasn't like Ginger was doing anything on purpose. The boys just kept attacking, they said the meanest names. They cursed and swore. All Ginger wanted was to be left alone. It wasn't even worth it trying to make friends anymore. Wasn't being quiet and staying away enough?
Ginger had learned to not try to hang out with the girls anymore. They just made fun too. Somehow it had all changed because of puberty. Before that, all the girls would play. They were best friends. They shared so much, all the same likes and dislikes, the same attitudes, they spoke the same language. Dad and mom always wanted Ginger to play with the boys. Boys were so weird. They made no sense. And they were really rough and sometimes even scary.
But the world had changed. Ginger hadn't. The boys kept trying to pick fights, to push and shove and hit. And they laughed while doing it. The girls became distant and the boys just kept pushing, pushing, hitting, hurting. Finally, Ginger had fought back. Not well. Not much. But it meant a trip to the principal's office.
It was a new principal. Two of them! They were both so beautiful! One of them was pale, with the most beautiful hair, long and flowing, the shade of sunrise and glory and joy. The other was dark, with dark hair long and sparkling with highlights. Ginger couldn't stop staring at the dark, flowing hair, so shimmery and lovely. If only dad and mom would allow long hair. Ginger envied long, beautiful hair so much.
The pale principal sighed. "What am I to do with you, hmm? I know you didn't mean any harm, not really. You all come in here so filled with charity and hope and kindness. You really believe, so strongly, that you are doing what I want, that you are really following the rules. I've given up scolding you. You just honestly don't know any better, and all of you really do mean the best."
"It does work to save them, Tia. I keep trying to tell you that you should just embrace this. It is their way, after all. Humans are the ones who started this, and it is part of their culture to sneak about taking choice from each other. At least in this, they are not taking life, but instead giving it. You really should be less grim. Discord had a point there." The face under the dark, sparkling hair smiled at Ginger. It felt like laughter itself to see that almost admiring smile.
"My little filly, I suppose you have done your best to do good as you see it, and it is clear that in your heart there is only kindness. Would you do me a favor for the rest of your life?" A swirl of morning mixed with sunset swept across half of the winged principal's long, graceful muzzle.
Ginger wanted nothing more in all the world than to be a good girl and to obey. She nodded with conviction.
"Remember that love cannot live if it is forced. That's all, just that."
Ginger looked at her hooves, not quite ashamed, but aware that she had perhaps not been the best pony she could be. She wanted to please the princesses. Always. "I will remember that, princess Celestia."
"Be a good girl now!" Luna giggled after she said that. It sounded like bells.
"I will, my beautiful princess." Ginger blushed. She hadn't meant to be so direct about her fascination.
"Hah! That is one more for ME!" Luna stuck her tongue out at her sister. "Remember, foal, you are loved in return by the night!"
The principal's office had expanded, somehow, when Ginger wasn't looking. It was as big as the sky now, and caught between day and night. Once again darkness came, but after that, came the dawn.
Ginger's hooves were a brilliant white, and pearlescent. So was her coat, white as sugar, and shimmery like fine optic cable. She was still so sleepy, it was difficult to hold her head up off of her forelegs. She laid her head down on her foreknees and stared at where her hooves met her fetlocks through half-lidded eyes. She tilted her head slightly and smelled her own scent, her nose sniffing at her own silken coat, covering her legs. It smelled so good, slightly sweet, delicate, feminine. She lay her head down again, rubbing her cheek against her foreknees, feeling the velvety softness that covered them.
After a short nap of a few minutes, she felt more awake. She discovered her ears and twisted them this way and that. Somehow it made her giggle to move them. She raised her head and gave it a shake. Her soft white mane swung and rippled as she moved. She tilted her head down slightly letting her mane hang so that it draped across part of her vision, like a blanket of hair, long and straight and lovely. It shone in the light, and Ginger simply could not help but laugh with delight.
She shifted her body, feeling a blanket underneath her. She was on a bed, the bunk she had slept in the night before. She looked around, buoyant with the most delightful, inexplicable joy. It was just there, a kind of inner fountain of happiness, bubbling over. She suddenly remembered, her thoughts beginning to clear - all newfoals feel happy when they wake up. Post conversion bliss. So that is what it felt like. It was wonderful. She wished everypony could feel it, all the time.
Nutmeg! Where was Nutmeg? Ginger swung her long neck around, towards the bunk that Nutmeg had used last night. There was a pony in it. She was a soft tan color, a warm pleasant hue that felt like contentment. It was kind of yellow, and kind of light brown, and just a little golden, too. It made Ginger think of custard, real custard. They'd had it once at the Enclave... sad thoughts began to appear, but the inner well of joy inside pushed them away. Ginger felt light and floaty once more.
That must be Nutmeg! The tan pegasus mare in the bunk with the beautiful dark crimson mane must be Nutmeg. Oh, she got to be a pegasus! Ginger felt so happy for her. She would get to sleep on clouds and fly in the bright blue sky! Nutmeg deserved that kind of freedom and beauty - Nutmeg had always been such a good pony.
Ginger called to her "Nutmeg? Ohhh... heloooo? Nutmeg? Wakey wakey! Can you hear me? You're beautiful, Nutmeg! You're a lovely pegasus, isn't that splendid?"
Nutmeg began to stir. Ginger saw her ears twitch. Yes, that was fun! Now Nutmeg was moving her tail. Oh! Ginger hadn't even thought of that. She turned to look back over her flanks, and swished her long, shining tail back and forth across the bunk. That was even more fun than her ears, but it made her thighs feel cold. She carefully tucked her tail in close to her flanks, feeling the silky smooth hair press delightfully against... places... that she would have to explore more carefully another time. They were really nice places.
"Ginger! Oh my sweet Celestia! Is that you?"
Ginger turned to face her friend. Her best friend, really. She'd never actually realized that. Nutmeg was her very best friend. She really was her sister. And now they could be sisters together, forever. Ginger grinned. "Hello little sister! You look so pretty - you should try your wings!"
"I have wings?" Nutmeg looked in delight at her new limbs, and hesitantly extended them. "Look! Look at that! I can move them! I'm doing that!"
"Of course you are! They're your wings. One day you'll be flying all around leaving your poor older sister behind..." Ginger let out a mock sigh of resignation, but the bubbly feeling inside wouldn't let her continue it for long. She found herself giggling. She just felt so silly and good.
"Sister?" Nutmeg was puzzled for a moment. Then she smiled. "OK, sis!" Nutmeg had once wanted Ginger to want her, as a boyfriend would, but deep down, she knew that would never happen. Somehow, Ginger had turned out as a mare. It suited her. Of course it suited her. It was what she really was, all along. The excursion into the virtual world had proven that. Nutmeg remembered how content, how relaxed, how... herself... Ginger had been in that illusory mare's body. A sister would be fine. It would be wonderful to have Ginger as her sister.
"I love you sister!" It just came out. She couldn't help it. Nutmeg just felt so incredibly open, so utterly bouncy inside.
"I love you too." Ginger's words sank into Nutmeg's very heart. Ginger really did love her. She always had. Nutmeg thought back to all the things that Ginger had done to comfort and protect her. Ginger made a very good big sister.
"What now, big sis?" It was fun to state it out loud. Big sis. Nutmeg had always taken comfort in solid definitions and well defined relationships and situations.
Ginger stopped and thought for a moment. This was a completely new life. In her old life, she had been put in charge by circumstance. She really didn't want that anymore. "Nutmeg?"
"Yes?"
Ginger looked at her sister with pleading eyes."Could you be the big sister? I want to be the little sister. Please. Pretty please?"
Nutmeg stared. What an odd... "Of course, Ginger. I'm the big sister now. I'll take care of you, so you don't worry, alright?" It felt right to say that. Nutmeg wanted to protect little Ginger. She somehow felt stronger and more confident just thinking that way.
Ginger instantly relaxed. There were almost tears in her eyes. Actually, looking closer, there really were. "Thank you big sister! Thank you! Yay! Yaaaaayyyyy!!!" Ginger was practically singing her 'yay' and her tail was wagging so hard it made slapping noises on the bunk.
Ginger used her foreknee to delicately dry her eyes. "So... big sister? What now?"
Nutmeg raised her long neck up straight and tall. "First we find some food - I don't know about you, but I am starving!" Newfoals were always hungry right after conversion. Ginger enthusiastically nodded agreement, grinning with happiness at the thought.
"Then," Nutmeg flexed her wings "we fly this coop and head straight to the nearest Bureau, and from there to Equestria. Where we belong."
Ginger laughed with delight and clumsily clopped her hooves together attempting applause. She really was a little filly, inside. And it was wonderful to see her so happy at last. They knew where they were going, and they were done with what they'd been. They knew what they wanted, and they'd forget what they'd seen. The future was certain, and they had time to work it out.
Grey Crusader sent two of his toughest to make sure that the pair from Squamous made it to the local Bureau safely. It was probably unnecessary, but he was a pony who liked to be sure about things.
"Do you want the results from the hazing?" Grey frowned at Silence. She was an insolent little pegasus sometimes.
"Not hazing! Wargame! It was a wargame, useful training for both our regulars and those three dozen pathetic human recruits! Just because it was blanks and potions doesn't mean it wasn't a legitimate military..."
"Hazing. You just enjoy making humans dance. We could have ponified those recruits the usual way. You're a twisted son of a bitch, Grey." Hushed Silence blinked at him. Her muzzle showed not the slightest hint she believed anything else.
"Yeah, damn straight I am. Hard as cock during mating season, and cold as ice in winter." No, she didn't see. Good. He'd never hear the end of it if she really knew. He had an organization to run. He couldn't afford anypony seeing him as less than a hard-assed commander. The last thing he needed was word to get out that he had arranged something like this just to help two mixed-up ponies feel better. Fucking hell. Sometimes he wondered if the alteration the WorldGov had done to him was failing. He'd end up a syrupy sweet pony someday, and then what?
Silence turned away, the report tucked under a wing. "Don't worry, oh fierce and terrible Grand Master - I'll make sure those two get to Equestria safe and sound."
Dammit. She knew.
Michelson, Ginger: 106 Morely, Nutmeg: 103
The End
The Lost In The Herd Series:
One: The Big Respawn,
Two: Euphrosyne Unchained,
Three: Letters From Home,
Four: Teacup, Down On The Farm
The Conversion Bureau Novels:
27 Ounces: A story of eight and one half ponies
The Taste Of Grass
The Conversion Bureau: Code Majeste
The Conversion Bureau: The 800 Year Promise
The Conversion Bureau: Going Pony
The Reasonably Adamant Down With Celestia Newfoal Society!
Recombinant 63: A Conversion Bureau Story
HUMAN in Equestria: A Conversion Bureau Story
The PER: Michelson and Morely
Little Blue Cat
Cross The Amazon
Adrift Off Fiddler's Green: The Final Conversion Bureau Story
The Short Stories:
Her Last Possession
The Conversion Bureau: PER Equitum
The Conversion Bureau: Brand New Universe
Tales Of Los Pegasus
The Poly Little Pony
The very first and original
Conversion Bureau Group
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Optimalverse Works:
Friendship Is Optimal: Caelum Est Conterrens
Leftovers: A Friendship Is Optimal Story
IMPLACABLE
My Life In Fimbria
Injectorverse Works:
I.D. - That Indestructible Something
The More Conventional Fanfics:
The Ice Cream Pony Summer
Around The Bend
PRIDE related works:
Transspecieality
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I get first plox?
562030
Only if you actually read the chapter and have something to say. Otherwise, you get last plox. And I get to plotz. Oy vey.
562036 Wut.
And done... well I hope I can still hold my first but if not that was an... interesting read. Keep up the good work Chat.
Ginger certainly seems pretty accepting of his whole gender change, I would have expected maybe some surprise and then quick acceptance since he or rather she seemed rather happy with the end results. Out of curiosity why did Grey Crusader decide to douse him with cherry potion? As a joke at his expense, or was there aim so bad all they had left was cherry flavored?
562151
Grey sussed their hash, both of them, in ten minutes, last chapter. That included figuring out that Ginger wasn't just a gay man, but something more profound. Grey is one of the original agents. He's dealt with crap no human or pony could imagine, and lived. He can read a person like Twilight can read a book. (Grey Crusader on loan from Krass McWriter)
Don't worry. I am clear on the deep and intrinsic reality of gender as identity. Ginger was just acting out because she was in a lot of personal pain. The clue she was T was in her reaction within the virtual world.
Actually, I had a different ending to this story. I decided against it, because I cared about the characters and wanted them to have a happy ending.
The original ending had a big 'ol potion battle, and our pair get doused. At the very end Ginger wakes up, and goes "OH NO!!!"
"What! What is it Ginger?" Nutmeg was startled "We're PONIES now! Finally we're ponies!"
"I KNOW!" Ginger sobs "AND I REALLY DON'T LIKE IT AT ALL!"
THE END.
I came that close.
562196 I think that would have been a great ending. Or maybe you could do an alternate ending instead, describing how much they both realize that thumbs actually do rock.
Incidentally Chatoyance have you ever thought about doing a TCB story where the ponies get to Equestria and try deponfying. Kind of like a reverse conversion bureau.
562211
Actually I have. Another writer already tried a hand... heh... at the concept, he called it 'The Humanification Bureau', but he missed several tricks in my opinion. I might just someday do my own take on the concept, on a 'Humanification Bureau', where the situations are reversed.
562221 Yeah I read it, but it was basically the conversion bureau but ponies and humans positions reversed. I felt it was a bit lacking, I feel that type of story would need its own special twist to differentiate it from the regular TCB stories beyond a simple swap. Out of curiosity since you've just done a comedy TCB what kind of story do you plan on doing next?
Um, Grey is a unicorn...
But this ending is awesome! Also, did you peek my notes about Hushed Silence and Grey's relationship?
If not thats scary acurrate
. You really caught everypony's personallity perfectly. I really enjoyed the whole ride.
562234
FIXED! Grey is now a unicorn. Sorry, Krass. Stupid mistake. I know better, I just screwed up.
As for knowing about Silence... the real secret is that Everything The Can Be Imagined Is Real Somewhere, so it's just a matter of tapping in and paying attention. Or asking, but the rates can be expensive.
562296
I actually have her sloted as Forest Mint's mother in John's 'canon' verse.
One more fix to fix: "He leapt out over the edge of the Tacksworn Corporation skyscraper, the distant street far below his earthpony body,"
The ending was sweet, but the skirmish felt... rushed. Granted, it kind of was, what with Crusader wanting to get those two on the fast track to equinity and Equestria, but after all the drama and tsuris, it came as something of a shock. I guess I just wasn't expecting the comedy-drama pendulum to have an elastic band attached.
In any case, I'm happy for our two intrepid Rebirthers. I hope they show up in the background of future stories.
Woah, I wasn't expecting an ending so soon. What I felt was going to happen, judging by the pace and form, was that it was going to be a three-part journey, with Squamous as the first act, Oklahoma City the second, and somewhere else (or several locales) as act three. Also, I figured that Gladiola was going to be their permanent climatic foil. Razor intelligence, focus, and skill, yet she has a mountain of dark secrets about her. M&M are open, honest, light, and entirely hopeless. I figured the ultimate thing that you were going to be saying was about the value of the protagonists' shared virtues, regardless of species. I mean, this is pretty fun, but, oh well. You were trying something totally new, and outside your comfort zone, and it was damn good when you take that into consideration.
Nice ending....
and I guess the reason Ginger didn't mention his "investigation" of the "HLF" was to make sure Nutmeg could stay happy?
and not equal numbers at the end for the win
that's another one down.I would like another attempt at a comedy fic from you. I think you were too ambitious with your first one. Comedy done right is like a muscle, you need to work it out in order to get the proper timing down. All in all, good continuation of your expanded universe.
well that was a fast release. Kinda wish we could have seen Nutmeg's conversion dream though. Oh well, it was still a fun read. Looks like Team Rumpguard is blasting off for the final time.
In other news I totally wanna see an illustration of them ponified with Opal in the middle like Meowth
...Tacksworn Corporation?
Damn it, will you stop teasing my muse! She's enough trouble as it is!
A nice quickly done story, and for once i was here from the start to the finish. Enjoyed it almost as much as i enjoyed the stories featuring caprice and Co. Any hints you can give to your next story?
562710
Wow... that's pretty cool. I didn't think of any of that, and that would have been pretty neat, actually. I felt pretty fail, over the comedy issue, so I just wanted to give these characters a happy ending because I felt sad for them... and to an extent embarrassed for me. But I learned a lot from the story, if nothing else. Your ideas though, are brill.
562924
By doing a 'falling with style' moment right out of Ambassador's Son, having Grey leap from the 'Tacksworn Corporation' seemed like a good tip of the 'ol Borsalino to you. Good writers borrow, great writers steal?
563115
Thank you, more than anything, I just wanted everypony to feel good at the end of this story. If it was fun, then I feel glad, because I definitely felt sad that I was unable to make it a complete comedy story. As to what will be next:
I think I may do a blog about what doing this story taught me, and then I have an idea in my head that keeps nagging me. It has nagged me since I wrote the blog about the difference between Equestria Prime and Equestria Beta and... there is this part of my brain that works hard for 'No-Prizes'... the old Marvel Comics thing, where readers had solutions to when the writers screwed the pooch, solutions that patched the universe and made everything make sense after all. My brain does that, because I get so annoyed when writers screw up on continuity.
The story would probably be called 'Around The Bend'. The idea is this: Twilight Sparkle is having a normal day, when she decides, uncharacteristically, to take a shortcut through town. A shortcut that leads to a street with an unusual name, Shark Street, and she is puzzled, because they are hundreds of miles from any ocean, and ponies wouldn't name a street after a predator. More than that, she's read every map of Ponyville, and she knows for a fact that there is no such street. It's not a new street, in fact it looks really old. There's a little gap, a crack, in the walkway, that runs so deep she can't see the bottom. She doesn't want to get her hoof stuck in it, so she gives a little hop and heads down the street just to see....
563625
More and more, I'm finding stories exploring the PER to be very interesting, because there's lots of conflicting loyalty, perverted loyalty, and cognitive dissonance at work in the PER mindset. I hope more of them show up!
As for Ginger and Nutmeg, I was kind of hoping they would, through sheer accident and dumb luck, bring about an apocalyptic-scale ponification event, succeeding their 100-conversion goal by several orders of magnitude (when I saw this chapter title, I thought that might just be what happens). That may actually make for a better beginning to a story than an end, though, now that I think about it. How would the world react to a 200-mile-wide stripe of western Europe suddenly going pony courtesy of the PER? What about it happening to the urban centers of China, or the American Midwest? How would Celestia react? What would the consequences be for the human political and social climate? Would the perpetrators of such an act only get some stiff words in their conversion dream, as Ginger and Nutmeg did? Damn, I really want this story to exist now.
563625
)
Oh it's so much worse than that though! You gave that pair of dragons a corporation. Augh! (seriously, I loved the ...what do you call it? Not a cameo? A homage? it's just now you've given me story ideas again - which is wonderful and annoying all in one
99+99=198, not 181
Chatoyance, Y U NO maths?
That aside, great story, and good ending!
564303
I suck at math. Thanks for catching that. FIXED.
564303
No, the math was correct. You're forgetting the first two chapters.
Chapter 1: 15 ponified
Chapter 2: 2 ponified, 15 + 2 = 17
Chapter 3: 181 ponified, 17 + 181 = 198
198 ÷ 2 = 99 apiece
564736
)
You'd be correct, if she was talking just about the football players. But, even though it did say 'football,' I think it was used as an example of sorts, and she meant all the people they'd ponified. (I feel like I'm sounding like a jerk here, if so, I'm sorry
Chatoyance, could you clarify this, please?
563625
Oooooh, so something not tcb for once. Sounds Extremely interesting! I shall be lurking till it comes to fruition.
This story was nifty. Keep up the nifty work, nifty writer.
A beautiful ending to another wondrous escapist journey. Any chance you could tell me how you write so good? Also, Nutmeg gets to fly, and Ginger finally gets to be who she really is! YAY!
564977
I've already written... one... non TCB story. It's a very proper fanfiction, actually, about the Cutie Mark Crusaders - it's called The Ice Cream Pony Summer. You can reach it here:
The Ice Cream Pony Summer
I'm actually pretty proud of it, though I don't think many know it even exists.
Nice ending to this story. It was short but but sweet and very funny at times.
I actually think... you could keep up a TCB comedy arc with Nutmeg and Ginger as they roam Equestria, trying too hard to fit in.
And they keep running into PER victims versus properly converted newfoals...
566872
Oh wait, i totally read that already. Disregard that last comment then! Actually as i re-read that last one it seems i put it kind of rudely...I have no problem with your Conversion bureau stories and if you wanted to write only in that universe i would still be just as happy. "For once" was not how i meant to put it.
Hmm.. it seems as though the ending is open enough for a sequel.. Am I correct?
The seemingly gay man converted into a mare and soon entitled herself as the little sister?
What a weird ending. But that doesn't matter. The entire ride from the beginning was very enjoyable
Oh silly luna. Even as a welcoming goddess you still found a time to joke around.
576053
"The seemingly gay man converted into a mare and soon entitled herself as the little sister?"
There is a subset of transsexuals that act out fiercely just as some gay men do, and for the same reasons - fear, anger, pain, association with subculture, and of course possible self loathing. It is unusual, and goes utterly against stereotype - most MtF pre-transition transsexuals tend to be shy, cautious types, desperately trying to avoid detection, or often personal admission of their condition. But not all. Some few, some very few, can be flamboyant. I've actually met a few like that; initially they seemed like over-the-top gay men, but in the end, they were not.
Flamboyance is a defense mechanism as much, or more, than it is adherence to subculture in order to have a sense of belonging. It is a tool, technology, and I pictured Ginger as a trannie that grew up within a certain type of gay male subculture, and ended up adapted to that culture.
But I was careful to leave constant hints as to Ginger's true nature of being neurologically female - the scene within the virtual world being the most obvious - so that, to those who know the signs, her ending would be fairly obvious.
In previous stories (27 Ounces comes to mind) I have portrayed a future in which homosexuality was eventually accepted by culture and by even the most narrow of churches, who both then went on to find a new scapegoat to hate, which would logically -sad to say- be the transsexual. Following this future history, we can imagine Ginger trying to make do fitting the role of a gay man, as a sort of 'make do', in order to avoid facing her actual reality. Sorry, Ginger, neurological intersex doesn't just go away because you want it to.
I see Grey Crusader as the sort of individual that can pick up the truth of another from observation, after the manner of Sherlock Holmes. I see Grey as having identified Ginger's true issue immediately, and so arranged for her to be transformed into a proper mare's body, since being stuck as a stallion would just leave her as miserable as a pony as I assure you she was as a human.
As for Ginger getting to be the little sister, that was a fair and just turnabout exchange of power between her and Nutmeg. Until that time, Ginger had served as protector and leader in the pair, and she was tired of it. Nutmeg, for her part, was clearly getting weary of being in the sub role with regard to Ginger - we saw how she could become annoyed at Ginger's insane attempts to lead and make decisions.
In letting Ginger be the little sister, and Nutmeg be the big sister, both benefit. Nutmeg, the more sensible of the two, can finally have some power in her life, and determine a reasonable path for the two of them, and Ginger, far less sensible, can finally relax and not feel stuck doing a role she is manifestly unsuited for. I see that exchange as a relief for both of them, which is why Nutmeg was so agreeable about it. Frankly, I think Nutmeg was pretty much done with crazy schemes and following Ginger around. And Ginger clearly was weary of being... less than competent. She's a follower who never got to follow, and Nutmeg is a leader who never got to lead. Finally things are sorted properly, now that they are outside of the human patriarchal roles.
It's quite makes a sense.
Even though it's rather hard to see it since Ginger looked like a leader figure since the beginning (albeit an incompetent one)
The role reversal, after you described it like that, it seemed like a mighty fine idea. Minutes ago I though it was related to his transformation to another gender.
If I had three words to describe this, it would be: "fun little fic."
Once again I find myself judging fics before I bother to look at 'em... PER, they're bad guys, how could that be a comedy?
You know. I did like this one better than some of the others. Mainly because these two screw ups are so entearing, and it seems a bit more light hearted.
Oh, I have been a Rumpguard,
For fifteen days or more,
Of Unicorns and Pegasi,
I thought I knew the score,
But now we've got a weapon,
We've never had before,
HLF is looking worried,
And they're going to worry MORE!
Dear Celestia,
We Live To Serve Ya!
Harr-Harr, PER, Long Live PER,
Potion Sprayers, In the sky...
Well, I started out with Megaphones,
And convincing dopes and rubes,
With a hundred foals just like me,
We were never down the tubes,
But soon I learned that HLF,
Was nastier by far,
It wasn't very long before (Who did I join?)
I joined the PER!
Dear Celestia,
We Live To Serve Ya!
Harr-Harr, PER, Long Live PER,
Potion Sprayers, In the sky...
The Few, The Proud, The P-E-R,
The Few, The Proud, The P-E-R,
The Few, The Proud, The P-E-R,
The Few, The Proud, The P-E-R!
The Few, The Proud, The P-E-R!
Dear Celestia,
We Live To Serve Ya!
Harr-Harr, PER, Long Live PER,
Potion Sprayers, In the sky...
And then came Squamous City,
That fight we almost won,
They thought they had us beaten,
Thought we were on the run!
Earlier this morning,
They kicked in our front door,
But for every pony they took away (How Many did they miss?)
They missed a hundred more!
Dear Celestia,
We Live To Serve Ya!
Harr-Harr, PER, Long Live PER,
Potion Sprayers, In the sky...
I spent eight weeks as a vagrant,
Had time to think and plan,
Forced to flee like a little colt,
I came back a Stallion!
There's only one thing that I learned,
While in that hot bus I fried,
HLF will never leave us (Until When?)
UNTIL THEY'RE PONIFIED!
Dear Celestia,
We Live To Serve Ya!
Harr-Harr, PER, Long Live PER,
Potion Sprayers, In the sky...
The Few, The Proud, The P-E-R,
The Few, The Proud, The P-E-R,
The Few, The Proud, The P-E-R,
The Few, The Proud, The P-E-R!
The Few, The Proud, The P-E-R!
Dear Celestia,
We Live To Serve Ya!
Harr-Harr, PER, Long Live PER,
Potion Sprayers, In the sky...
And all through the days of land blockade,
I watched my family die,
Oh, in the streets of Phoenix,
You could hear the people cry,
I can't forget that massacre, that Friday in our Hall,
I salute our fallen brothers,
As I watch the monkeys fall!
Dear Celestia,
We Live To Serve Ya!
Harr-Harr, PER, Long Live PER,
Potion Sprayers, In the sky...
Dear Celestia,
We Live To Serve Ya!
Harr-Harr, PER, Long Live PER,
Potion Sprayers, In the sky...
749613
I don't know the song! What song is this a parody of? I must know!
This fic makes me feel a deep emotion that goes beyond anger, I think i'm livid right now. I need to get livid more often, makes me feel ALIVE! Words cannot describe how pissed off I am at you Chat(errorist)oyance.
770769 The real terrorists are the H.L.F., they know their world is all but finished, they know that there's only one way to come out the other side with your life, but they refuse to accept it, and actively work to prevent other people from saving themselves. P.E.R. isn't great, but their wacky antics and their (almost) entirely non-lethal methods are better than the alternative, and to me, that deserved a song, even if it was recycled from a group that rivaled H.L.F. for sheer hate. Yes, I know the song from Occupied Ireland in the mid-to-late 1990's. Deal With It. Also sorry if the source I got the song from was offensive to Most Honorable Lady Chatoyance, that was not my intention, and I beg her forgiveness.
The whole story was a fun read and I liked all of the references. It was a little sad, but it was very satisfying to know what Celestia thinks of the PER.
Aww, I was thinking all along that they would realize they could get their last two points by ponifying eachother.
I really liked this story. You had me rooting for the success of these two, at minimum, well-intentioned extremists. Pretty funny at times too. Ginger and Nutmeg are like the Abbott and Costello of the PER.
1917471
The delay potion had been engineered to not take effect until quite a few minutes after it is taken. In effect, the delay potion's nanomachines had clocks that began ticking after activation, preventing conversion from taking place immediately. When the clocks go off, conversion happens normally.
The concept of this relatively simple alteration of the nanomachine programming was to provide a time-delayed potion that could be secretly used on targets by a PER agent, who would then have time to slip away, unnoticed, so they would not get caught.
Ginger and Nutmeg were a little less than clear on the best way to apply this, though...
Now I understand the mindset of the PER members a little better after reading this story and sort of understand how they're like um... ponies (is that the right term?) and not what they're normally like in some of these fictions.
Near the end I thought Grey was going to force the two protagonists to do some rigurous training so they can become the ponies they want, but Grey did the right thing by tricking them like that though. Even if Ginger almost caught onto what Grey had planned, but he was right. While their ideas are interesting, I don't think they can handle the HLF in the final years in the end. So thank you for the ride.
Oh yeah there were a couple mistakes there but I only managed to copy one and I forgot what chapter that this line belonged to since I was enjoying the story too much to comment:
Mistake:
The were goddesses, but were so loving and kind that they called themselves merely 'princesses' and personally interacted with their creations. Everypony loved and respected the princesses.
Solution:
They were goddesses, but were so loving and kind that they called themselves merely 'princesses' and personally interacted with their creations. Everypony loved and respected the princesses.
1998704
Thank you for catching that. FIXED!