I am not a normal person... I have two personalities, one of them is when I'm normal, when I'm nice... the other one, is when my mentality snaps, I go from a nice, carefree person, into a mass murderer... a killing machine that can't be stopped. So when I get transferred to a world of cute little ponies... I try to control my other side, but he is desperate to get out... but I don't wanna hurt the ponies here. P.S. My spanish is not on point, so it may not be 100% correct, and yes this is a Jeff the Killer story as well.
y tho
This doesn't even..
just why
6006456 Why are you even here if you hate both ponies and bronies
More please, but when you do the spanish parts have the english at the bottom please.
Here we go again!
6006771 Ok
I highly suggest that you check how to properly use grammar, write dialogue, and have an editor by your side.
Your story is too dialogue heavy, meaning that the characters are speaking more rather than being described, or bringing the reader into a more descriptive case.
Correct Dialogue: "Seems fine to me," said Ridgee.
Incorrect Dialogue: "Seems fine to me." Said Ridgee.
That's not the only problem, but your story contains Spanish at the end, which may confuse your readers.
6007694 Thanks
wouldn't this count as a crossover?
6009146 donezo
cool like fav follow I hope to see some more chapters in the future
- Razor Wing out
Maybe like Dave regaining control of his body and how to get rid of Jeff?
That last chapter kind of stump me. There is no way Jeff can't be stop or invisible, every enemy must have a weakness.
Also I think Jeff is way too OP.
6053284 No no no no, Dave believes this because he hasn't found anyone who can kill Jeff, yet... you'll see
Ok but cn i be featured no one special but cn i be dragon borned anc for u daaaa and say yeaaaaaaaa
And yea have jeff get raped by a trollface
just the thought of someone talking to someone else with no one else knowing what they're saying cracks me up
someone translate NOW!!!!!!
6053284 yes he is OP'd, but that makes it all the better
Have Jeff go on more rampages! That's why I read this story. Oh, maybe have him massacre the changelings! Idfk what pint in the show you're at right now in the story, but you should make him massacre them! It will be fun to read!
6272053
Indeed. Changeling massacre. Omg. With a chainsaw. Chainling massacre. Yeah references
LAWLZ>=O
6166521 use google Translate it helped me
Best chapter 10/10
Would rexomend
Jeff and pinkie....who would be angry at me if i said ship this?
Dude, talk about overkill.
Im confused right now /-l
So much plot 10/10 -IGN
gr8 b8 m8; I r8 8/8...
tse4.mm.bing.net/th?id=OIP.M7b946c1169c7312faddae2916d0840c0H0&w=252&h=188&c=7&rs=1&qlt=90&o=4&pid=1.1
6914511 no Jeff and pinkiminia
Sir I have no words his chapter was beautiful have all the fat girls ( gives you ice cream ) here is there food ( before you can talk I run away leaving you with the fat girls sniffing the air and when they look at you they let out a roar and tackle you to the ground and eat all the ice cream)
*slow claps* you sir have fucked all the ducks congrtz you've triggered all the 10K word athours you dead now 10/10????...sure
Jeff has no eyelids and can't close his eyes. Just so you know.
I hope it comes down to Jeff vs pinkamenia
10/10 would read again
...sir, I believe this chapter is not even complete if my reading of the title of this chapter is correct.
I like how they act like nothing happened even though Jeff just killed shining armor