That long description. Wat.

6366520 Sorry I didn't know what I was doing, too force on playing cod black ops 3 beta this is my first story.

This name made me think it was a gaming crossover

That's more of an outline then a description...

And, get an editor.

Is it me, or is that description word salad?

6367172 it will have Assassin's creed

6367573 ok will do thank you.

6368077 I was thinking about the game evil within

6368262 No, it how much the soul and mind can take of being corrupted by around or within you.

6367573 This is the editor of the story and I'm sorry about a few of the errors but we were exhausted and this is our first story so I would like it if you would give it a chance we edited some of the first chapter and I sincerely hope its better for you

6379213

The main character Aaron Daniels has been forcefully infused with a new kind of magic called Voidbringer from Twilight and Celestia's testing project known as Nexus. During Aaron's arrival he sent a telepathic message to the eye that a capable host is able to wield it. 42 subjects were taken forcefully and tested on, only one survived the test subjects, while this is happening Nightmare Moon is back and is planning to take over Equestria. During the operation of infusing Voidbringer into Aaron's brain causing a construct into the mind forcefully bringing out a human named Yuno Gasai created by the eye as a defense mechanism to protect the eye and the host.

This giant text block. You need to break it up into two or three paragraphs.

Its not my cup of tea as a story but I do want you to do well.

6379253 what is your cup of tea?

6379336

It varies, this story doesn't really make me want to read it. However I could come back to this later and want to read it and give an in depth correction/review.

6379353 Varies how?

6379358

I like a bit of everything but I never have been a fan of crossovers. The cross over character(s) never seem in character.

6379449 One thing about Yuno she batcrap crazy and we plan to keep her that way .

6379479

I wouldn't know, to me she's another character, given I've never heard of her.

6379484 look on youtube

6379488

Oh! Oh! That crazy chick! Okay.

6379498 And that's why I love and chose her.

6379507

Just keep her in character.

6379512 With her I will.