• Member Since 15th Oct, 2014
  • offline last seen Yesterday

IndiBrony


We're all stories in the end. Just make it a good one, ey?

Comments ( 11 )

Pretty good. A few errors here and there that an editor should sort out. RD and AJ were well-written.

Huh surprisingly good.

6838191 An editor is a good idea at this stage, I think. Was there anything glaringly obvious to you that I've overlooked?

I try and re-read my stories a few times over before submitting, but that doesn't always get rid of the errors, nor does it always help in keeping the story neat and tidy - an editor is probably a good idea, hah.

this is different. i like it :D

6838687 I'm glad you enjoyed it and spared a space for it on your bookshelves! While you're here, why not check out some of my other stuff? I'm not sure what else would fall into the categories in your library, but be sure to check out the featured stories my page - they're mostly very short reads compared to this one.

6838727 Okieee I'll be sure to check 'em out. and if my bookshelf doesn't fit anything, I could always make another lol

Wow! this was scary, well written, and the pace was right. Everything felt real.

The situation resolve easily, but felt ok to.

Wow.

6851754 Thanks for the compliments!

I feel my writing style has improved somewhat since I started writing, but I'm always looking for ways to improve.

Endings are one thing I've noticed I struggle with. After the climax of the story, I get extremely messy. 'Spike: The Dragon Princess' was a good example of this. I ended it rather abruptly after the main conflict had been resolved, leaving many unresolved plot points. I'm planning an entire sequel to rectify that one.

I think my biggest downfall, story-wise, is that I don't plan a story - everything I write is free-flowing and almost spontaneous in a way - and that leaves me open to forgetting certain things I've written, especially if a story is taking me a while to write. I've found myself re-reading my own stories several times over just to remember the important points and remember what I was thinking at the time of writing it.

I'm glad you enjoyed the story, though. It puts a smile on my face knowing I can genuinely entertain people with my writing. :twilightsmile:

6838767 Well I notice you've added a few more to your bookshelves. If you find yourself enjoying my work, why not subscribe and receive updates on all of my new releases? I'm always looking to increase my fan-base :heart:

Wow. This story is amazing! Yet all I can think about is how happy I am that you wrote Rainbow's character with abs! :raritystarry:

Excellent work. I’m impressed you didn’t take the easy way out where Spitfire actually does roofie Rainbow. Leaving the events of that night somewhat unclear makes Applejack’s trust in Dash that much more meaningful. Plus, the fact that both ponies absolutely regard what happened as rape sends a good message about the necessity of unambiguous consent.

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