My Roommate Is Not a Vampire

by Ave Celestia

The Unclean Beast

Octavia sighed in pleasure, content simply being so close to the pony she lo... she sniffed. She raised her head from Vinyl's mane, wrinkled her nose, and sniffed again. She frowned and cracked her eyes open. “Vinyl, I smell pee.”

“Huh? Octy, you must be imagining things,” said Vinyl, dreamily.

“No, really! It's gross!” Octavia half sat up and experimentally sniffed herself, sniffed Vinyl, then sniffed the black cape on which they both lay. She squirmed back in disgust. “Ugh! Vinyl! Where did you get this cape?”

“I found it.”

“Where did you find it?”

“In an alley in a dumpster! Can you believe somepony was trying to throw away this awesome vampire cape?”

“Can I believe somepony was trying to throw away trash? Yes, I can believe that.” She pushed at Vinyl.

“Aww, come on, Octy. Can't we just enjoy this moment? Here? Together?”

“Enjoy laying on a pee-soaked dumpster-cape? No.” She gave Vinyl a solid shove and stood up. “I'm going to go shower.” She looked over her shoulder, then down. Her voice was stern. “I expect you to have that rug cleaned.” She entered the bathroom and closed the door behind her and the sound of the shower came through the door.

Vinyl feebly reached out to the empty spot where Octavia had just lay. She groaned in frustration, flailing her legs uselessly. “Just put a stake in my heart and be done with it!”

The bathroom door cracked open and steam poured out. Octavia's voice echoed from inside. “Vinyl, you stink.”

Vinyl rolled upright, her ears perked. “Yeah?”

“...so get in here, you filthy vampire!”

Vinyl scrambled to her hooves and raced to the steamy bathroom.

“And take that disgusting cape off!”

The long, black cape fluttered to the floor as the bathroom door clicked shut behind Vinyl.

Author's Note:

A/N

Comments

[GenerousGhibli]

This was freakin adorable! I kinda wanna see it animated.

[Shadow_Wolf]

Bwhahahah! That was awesome

[Rubystars]

Cute story

[Bottom Out]

Awh, is it over already?

[Spider8ite]

This parody was pure gold and cuteness, I need more

[pjabrony]

This was cute little comedy between two friends/lovers.

[Ave Celestia]

6790519
6790608
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Thank you all for your kind comments! I'm glad you enjoyed reading the story!

6791900
Yes, I enjoyed writing that. It makes me laugh.

6791472
To be continued in our imaginations. I myself foresee Octavia giving Vinyl a thorough and vigorous scrubbing with a stiff-bristled brush and a rejuvenating eucalyptus mint shampoo with volumizing conditioner beneath the hot water of their steam-filled bathroom. Their entire apartment will smell of it for days.

[gchamp89]

Cute Story, Nice buildup

[BlueYoshi]

What a hilarious story it was. I loved every moment of the story, including Vinyl's unsuccessful attempts at trying to prove to Octavia that she's a vampire, Vinyl "losing" to Octavia after getting poked in the chest with Octavia's bow, and the little romantic moment at the end. Oh, and I bet Octavia and Vinyl had a wonderful time in the shower as well.

[Headlock1_0]

I'm too tired to form good sentences right now, so I'll just give you some words:
adorable, funny, lots of yes, made me smile and chuckle.

Now for me to go to sleep before I rope myself into another fic....

[PresentPerfect]

This is the best ScratchTavia-fic-where-Vinyl-isn't-a-changeling I have ever read. :D

[Ave Celestia]

7143476
Wow, thank you! I'm glad you enjoyed the story so much.

That's really rather high praise! What did you like so much about this story? The most commented on element seems to be “cute.” I'm Moderately Encumbered with non-creative stuff but do I have a different fic under construction. Tone is not completely nailed down yet and I figure I should work on further developing whatever was best about this story.

I'm receptive to suggestions! (from anyone!)

derpicdn.net/img/view/2014/3/9/570342__safe_solo_cute_glasses_octavia+melody_book_alternate+hairstyle_ponytail_adorkable_artist-colon-zacatron94.png

[PresentPerfect]

7150179
It was funny, you characterized Octavia and Vinyl the way I liked, and somehow I didn't barf myself inside out when it got shippy, so that's a win in my book. :V

[Ave Celestia]

7150211
That's good, honest feedback there. Thank you!

[D-JDOC]

Expectation: joke version of My Roomate Is A Vampire

Reality: cute fic that captured my vision of TaviScratch

[ObabScribbler]

Hi there. I hope you don't mind, but I liked think fic so much I've adapted it into an audio version on YouTube:

[Dustchu]

Aww, so shippy and yet so awesome sauce~ :heart; I like it!
I hearby approve of this story.
dl.dropboxusercontent.com/content_link/vUkvSNYheBIPMsnec6QKmEz4pyRVIum4I0BH2qBJlViZgh3W3fEtl79C79zcvApB/file

[Ave Celestia]

7550372

No, no I don't mind. I just laughed in delight literally for twenty minutes straight, the whole time through the reading and then five minutes after. The back of my head hurts from smiling so hard and so long.

I really, really needed that right now at this time in my life. I feel so much better! Thank you so very much!

[Cpt_MysticStirling]

I'' usually talkative and all -react to almost everything - but don't feel like it. Not when I'm in the mood for some lovey dovey. Also, sent by Scribbler. Loved the narration and this story itself! Though I will say this: Still a better love story than twilight

Best wishes,
~9thRoyalPirateAssassin (Mystic Stirling) ;P

P.S. Insta fav!!!

[QueenCartoony]

Aww this is such a cute story, one of the best ones of the OctavScratch I've ever read.

🎼🎵
10/10

[MixMassBasher]

Hilariously adorable Octavia Scratch foreplay!