• Member Since 10th May, 2013
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Sporktacles


I love sporks. And I love soup. Those two things unfortunately don't go together very well.

T

Trixie Trismegistus Trisdunamis, wandering adventurer and wizard supreme, faces her greatest and most terrible enemies yet - The Demon Queen of Fire and the Demon Queen of Darkness! Armed with her formidable magical artifacts, she stands before their impenetrable castle and prepares to crack open the horrors within.

Hear the tale of how the Great and Powerful (and also very attractive) wizard emerges victorious and brings her enemies under her control!

Chapters (2)
Comments ( 31 )

Huh, I wasn't expecting this, I sort of want a series of this.

i cast magic missile!

7016294

Ah, but are you attacking the darkness? Do you shoot magic at the darkness?

Ah, silly fun. Good read.

Look, Trixie, there's nothing wrong with LARPing. It's perfectly normal for a girl your age. Just do it behind closed doors and ... make sure to wash your hands afterwards.

C'mon, Trixie, you need to get a game of Owlbears and Oubliettes going on!

Shameless plug is shameless. I find this ironic because I also included LARPing in my Dungeons and Dragons parody group anthology. http://www.fimfiction.net/story/287205/ponies-and-dragons-just-have-fun Though maybe not as MEAN.

This deserves all the love.

This was delightful from start to finish. Thank you for it.

“Mom! Why’s that girl dressed like that? Is she one of those cultists you keep warning me about?”

His mother, a pretty lady with light beige skin and a lovely brunette braid, looked in the direction he pointed and narrowed her eyes. “Much worse, dear. She’s a LARPer.”

I was wondering what kind of story I was reading. And when I read this part, everything became abundantly clear. :pinkiehappy:

“She’s like, four feet above the ground,” said Rainbow dismissively. “The only thing she’ll bruise that ridiculously huge ego of hers.”

Applejack snorted at her friend's comment. “Yer really sayin’ that with a straight face, are ya.”

:rainbowdetermined2: Hell yeah.

She dropped to her knees before the door and peered into the keyhole. Doubtlessly they were in the middle of some kind of fiendish plotting.

Oh gosh. Err… well, it could be said that what their hands were doing was some kind of plotting, after a fashion.

:twilightoops: Uh. Well. :twilightblush: Hmmm.... :twilightsmile: Yep, still shipping it!

She would not be so easily distracted by the sight of this scene of sensuous smooching and seductive slurps surrounding these Sapphic succubi!

Well, okay. Maybe she’d be distracted for just a few seconds.

Oh, yeah.

:trollestia: Oh yeah.

Trixie smirked. “Quake in terror, Demon Queen! I, Trixie Trismegistus Trisdunamis, have come to vanquish thee! Behold the might of the Tabula Ocula, whose power is unmatched!”

Moment of truth?

“Trixie... Thrice-Great and Thrice-Powerful?”

...Of course. :twilightsmile:

“Is that an iPad?”

“It is the Tablet of Eyes!”

:rainbowderp:...
:rainbowlaugh:

“Twilight Sparkle, I am fairly sure this was not the kind of experimenting Dean Cadance had in mind when she asked me to provide you a private room for a lab.”

:trollestia: Oh, please. It's Cadance. This is exactly what she had in mind.

“Yes. Beatrix Lulamoon has been pointing it at students and school property for the past two days yelling ‘TRISMEGISTUS!’ and annoying people.” Luna sighed. “The imagination that teenagers have these days…”

Wait for iiiiiit....

Grinning like a madman, Celestia declared, “Luna? Luna is no more! Behold! For I am… NIGHTMARE MOOOOOON! The world shall be swept away by the black tides of my cursed magic! BWAHAHAHA!” Her maniacal laughter very quickly gave way to a fit of hysterical giggling.

There it is. :trollestia:

Luna buried her face in her hands in pure embarrassment. Without opening her eyes, she asked in a tiny voice, “Are you ever going to let me live that down?”

Celestia’s giggling faded slowly. She looked at her sister with a warm, loving smile that radiated with genuine sororal affection.

“No.”

Could be worse. You would be creating your own nightmares about it. (Too soon?)

"It’s a little embarrassing, but then, surely you’ve had some power fantasies back when you were younger.”

“What, me?”

:pinkiehappy: Waiting for iiiit...

An orange pegasus with an electric blue mane flew over to the top of the ruined castle, landing on one of few remaining patches of clear floor. He tried to avoid stepping on the rubble as approached the tower spire, where a red and black alicorn wearing a golden crown stood, resplendent in her majestic beauty.

Oh. My. God.

“And now, the reign of Queen Sunset Shimmer will last FOREVER! BWAHAHAHAHA!”

That is so cheesy, that is so corny, and that is so hilarious.

Sunset blushed. “Eheh… er, no. Never.”

:trixieshiftright: I don't believe you.

Trixie is off her meds

Sunset,why would you ever need to become black and red? Your orange red convination is already perfect for a fire theamed queen of evil :trixieshiftright:

Huh. It's like all those foals in Equestria pretending they are red-and-black alicorns..." mused Sunset.

Never change, Sunset. :pinkiehappy:

:trixieshiftright:

Grinning like a madman,

madwoman

This was fun. I had fun.

7378612

Oh hi! I know this sounds out of the blue, but I just wanted to say that I really really love your writing!

This fic is awesome. Princess Celestia Hunts Undead reminded me about it.

What?? So Nightmare Moon was EQG Luna's chunnibyou persona?!? Of all interpretations of the EQG equivalent this was the most hilarious! :rainbowlaugh::rainbowlaugh: Headcanon accepted! :pinkiehappy:

7378709

Hey, I don't know if you need a self-esteem boost or whatever, but I just read all your stories; and while obviously there's nothing as long as Sunset of Time or anything, I think you're just as good as Albinocorn, who I also admire. So, uh... y-yeah. I like saying nice things about authors who make me smile, and also make me want to write.

Comment posted by Sporktacles deleted Feb 3rd, 2017

At first I was like "Wha-What? What is going on?", but the more I read the more I liked it, especially when I understood that Trixie was roleplaying :D. That was hilarious, thank you for such an awesome story.

Well, that was fun. Like this but without the rocking music:

8178888

Holy cow, this is awesome!

EDIT: Omigosh there's a Japanese version!

I don't know why, but from the moment I read the story's title I assumed that the Demon Queens were Principal Celestia and Vice principal Luna. Would have made sense as the "tyrants" of the school.
That also means that I thought in the middle this were a princest story.

You know, right up until the moment Trixie barged into the closet, I thought the Demon Queens were Celestia and Luna. Naturally I started wondering if they were still related in the human world. Thank goodness I was barking up the wrong tree! :twilightoops:


Or should I rather be saying it's too bad that didn't pan out? :raritystarry:

Damn, this was great. :D poor Trixie, at the end, though. Give her back her toy!

Sunset Shimmer and Twilight Sparkle were frozen in shock, mid-kiss. It took nearly ten seconds before either of them realized what was going on, but the moment they did, they pulled apart in a sudden and frantic untangling of limbs and clothing.

Heh, I thought the Queens of Fire and Darkness were Celestia and Luna at first. Seemed weird that they would be kissing though.

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