On one day a pony goes missing and only the princesses know about it. But one of the princesses goes missing as well.
have fun reading.
Edited by my awesome editor: Just A Random Pegasus (give him a follow, he's a very good writer)
Im from the Netherlands!!!! 16 Years and counting. I'm a: Writer, Artist and Gamer. and Rainbow Dash is the best!! im also a beginning music producer working together with mr reader.
On one day a pony goes missing and only the princesses know about it. But one of the princesses goes missing as well.
have fun reading.
Edited by my awesome editor: Just A Random Pegasus (give him a follow, he's a very good writer)
Hello everyone, this is my first fanfic ever. Enjoy reading it.
The title should be Applejack's Secret and
Applejack is a name and nobody is for human/Equestria Girls No Pony is for the Pony world
7057610 thanks for the suggestions, ill change it imedeately.
This is my first ever fic. Hope you enjoyed reading it.
7057610
Th two terms are kind of interchangable, it's hardly 'noperson' or 'nohuman' (which I don't think are even real terms), it's just 'nobody', and ponies have bodies just the same as humans do.
Although yes, characters' names must always be capitalised
7057652 help me please what should i do?
I already changed the capitalisation of Applejack, but is it nobody or nopony.
7057658 It's just a personal preference thing, saying nopony/everypony/anypony is just a quirky thing, but no-one/everyone/anyone are all technically correct too. Maybe use the pony versions in dialogue and the general versions in narration, or use one consistently throughout
7057695 okay ill leave it as it is right now. But still thanks. I dont look at comments as critisism but i look at them as advice on what to do better.
Why do i get more dislikes then likes? I mean what did i do wrong?
7058283 thanks for the comment, i know that gores are not the most popular at this time, and im working on another story wich isnt gore at all, its about Rainbow adopting Scoots, then something bad happens (not going to tell what) but end good all good. i recently finished chapter one and it will soon be online, and chapter 2 is now being edited by my editor. its a sequel to someone else's story (i have permission) it will soon be online, its a sad story. i hope you will enjoy that one.
AJ loves her capitals.
7064022 yeah thats true
7078937 thanks for your comment. I hope you enjoyed reading it. It is my first fiction and soon my second one will be up (its waiting for approval now)
Don't be too discouraged by down votes, I personally thought that the overall concept of the story was good, and all it needs is just a little more polishing to get the reader really sucked into the story
7079006 thanks for your comment, and i know im not the best writer. And thanks for your tip.
First Fanfic? This could be interesting...
*5 minutes later*
Well, for a first try, you certainly got the horror down. I didn't see many problems other than with a bit of capitalization issues, but others have brought it up. And pointing them out might seem a bit too redundant...
Although, that ending. Hoo Boy! I was wondering why it had a "Mystery" tag! I would love to see that explained!
Like why there are so many stories in your "Unpublished Box"?
That is irrelevant!
7236230 fir the mystery tag.... it was a mystery tag..... it was a mystery where twilight was XD
7236457 Really? I thought the mystery was why Apuljak did that...
It DID state at the end that she doesn't remember precisely what the heck just happened!
7237150 yeah that is and will be a mystery forever why she did that!
Thanks for reading it!
7057581 I enjoyed it. The lack of quotation marks at some points was rather annoying though. Not to mention the excessive use of capital letters.
7266948 thank you very much for the comment! And i am currently having my proofreader checking this story for me. And thank you very much for the follow!